Just realised in THAT SCENE
Gendry pulls Arya’s hand to help him undress himself
I’ve still got to write metas for how it gives them both agency, and that y’all reaching.
“I’m not the red woman. Take your own blood pants off.”
Arya’s giving him room to make his own decision, to consent to her with his actions. She gives him time to push her away.
The real problem people have that they don’t want to address is that Arya was an 18-year-old virgin, having agency over her own sexuality, her own virginity, and her own nudity. That that scene wasn’t for the audience. And it wasn’t for Gendry. It was for Arya. Arya’s nudity was for Arya alone. That Maisie was the one who got to decide how much was shown. That Maisie decided on how her body was to be portrayed. That Maisie got the agency in a scene that many actresses never had. Many actresses never will have.
That Maisie, who’s first sex scene was so uncomfortable for her at 17/18, that she didn’t enjoy making it. That she got to enjoy making this one, having fun with this one, have a hand in crafting it. She was 17/18 being rutted against by a 26-year-old actor in the Falling (released 2014, Maisie born in 1997), and she didn’t enjoy it. I don’t recall the complaints then? Was it because she didn’t get naked? Maybe.
In a show where Dany was raped at 15 (implied and then brutally on screen), Sansa was raped at 17 (on screen), Robb Stark lost his virginity at 16/17 (in a fit of passion parallel to Gendrya), Jon lost his at 17/18? Missandei was a slave, Doreah was said to be 12... Of all our leads this is the one people have a problem with... when y’all still congratulating Pod having such skills when he was coded being 15/16 in s3. Wonderful shit guys.
And if your problem is with Gendry’s trauma. That’s fine.
Although I would say, Arya was not aggressive with it. In fact, Gendry pulls Arya to help him undress. The line of questioning she took was very important for what she wanted. How much experience does he have? Does she need to make it more special for him? Is his only experience the red woman? He implied sexual assault. Arya’s not knowledgable enough to fully understand what that means, but the hint was there in tied me down stripped me, and she made her behaviour appropriate. She forces nothing. If Gendry wanted her to stop asking he would have told her to stop- and she would have stopped. Arya’s not one to treat Gendry like shit. They have banter, he calls her milady. in the books she calls him a STUPID BULLHEADED BASTARD BOY. It’s not so off beat for her to say earlier “Even a smiths apprentice can do better than that.” If it was Jon failing to describe wights she’d say “Even a Man of the Night's watch can do better than that.” She’s called everyone in her life Stupid before. Because Gendry was a smith’s apprentice. She asked if he was with her. That’s medieval for did sex happen. He is quick to say no. He still knows what it was, and I think it’s about here that Arya STARTS to fully come to grips with it. With just what he was telling her. So she changes it up, other women only until comes time she wants to give him a chance to leave again, change his mind. “I’m not the red woman.” She’s not her. This is Arya, and Arya loves Gendry, and she doesn’t want to make him do something he doesn’t want to.
It wasn’t even aggressive questioning, it was three lines of questioning. “Was that your first time?” “Your first time with a woman. How many others? One? Two? Twenty?” She gets her answer, he tells her. Three. coincidentally the same amount of times Arya got stabbed by the waif. The same amount of arrowheads she threw. The number of scenes they have in the season where they make love. The season they separated. She gives him time to push her away, to say no, to leave. She would’ve accepted that. She pauses twice to let him to this. Before she kisses him, when she tells him to take his pants off. Her pants are still on then. They can leave now and stop. The sexual assault hasn’t been brushed over from Gendry’s end. He mentioned it in s7, he implied it to Arya now in ep 2. Arya didn’t gloss over it either. I’m not the red woman.
If we’re giving Arya shit for this, let's give Jon the same shit for approaching the woman who- for the first time ever confessing to being raped- announced to him she had been raped, for... what specifically felt like sex when I watch that. Arya didn’t know until that scene. Jon knew episodes before. Daenerys said as such explicitly. Gendry implied it.
I actually asked a friend who watched the J*nerys scene and how that felt to watch “ ... weird, and forced. like? the writing leading up to that point didn't make me feel like there was much chemistry between them at all “
Compared to the build-up of Gendrya “ A bit better. There was precedent for it, at least. It's a well-established ship, and the relationship between the two of them was developed enough to the point where it didn't seem like it came out of nowhere”
If the problem’s with Gendry’s age? Y’all didn’t have a problem with Bronn’s age in s8 ep 1 when he started having sex with three gratuitously naked girls young enough to be his daughters, or at least playing his daughters. Gendry’s in his early twenties. People ship Sansa with men twice her age - Jai.me, Tyr.ion, Little.finger, Wil,las Ty.rell. People ship her romantically with Ramsay. The guy who raped her on the show. People ship Da.ny and Dr.ogo when even in the show she’s still some 15 years younger than him, and he raped her. Again, not judging that, ship what you want, but really? That’s the one that’s okay?
It was mutually consensual and desired, touched on Gendry’s trauma with the characters both actively showing this is not the same. “I’m not the Red Woman.” I’m Arya. “Take your own blood pants off.” If you want this to continue, you have to do that. I’m not making you do this, and I’m not forcing your pants off. She wants his consent as much as he has hers. Because we know Melisandre yanked them off. Arya gave him a choice. And he chooses he wants to continue. He undoes his own pants.
The gravity of the situation? They could die in minutes, in hours, they don’t know, and Arya wants to do this before that happens. Gendry wants to do this. There’s urgency, they need each other, they want each other. She pushes him on the sacks- but he doesn’t leave. He doesn’t at any point stop her. We know he wanted her too, and that he understood that this is arya, and arya likes to be a leader- likes to be in control
Arya undressed herself for her. Not Gendry. Not the audience. Herself. Arya took control because it was her virginity. Not Gendry’s. Her’s. Gendry shouldn’t be the one in charge just because he’s been a victim. Arya needed to be in charge because it was HER VIRGINITY. She needed control over this. And as an 18-year-old virgin, do you know how much that meant for me to see? A virginal woman taking control, and not being demure for the man having her virginity.
In a world where people aren’t as offended by the rape, misogyny and murder in the show... a consensual act between an 18 year old and the guy she likes is too far?
Where were the cries that Arya’s too young when she was stabbing Meryn Trants eyes out? When the Hound smacked her over? When she was blinded? When she took out House Frey? When she was beaten? When she was stabbed?
Was dialogue clunky? yes? Could it have been different and better? yes. But I’m happy with what we got. As someone who loves Gendry, and loves Arya, and can differentiate my muse from the writing of the showrunners, and even sometimes the decisions that george makes and continue to love her.
No complaints about much that Arya does when she’s killing... Because sex is only for the pleasure of men, I forget. If she was a boy, and Gendry a girl, people would be celebrating her. Just like people congratulated Jon for sexing up Dany.
I’ve seen that too “If the situation was reversed there would be petitions”
who the fuck petitioned for Jon//erys to not happen again? Because that’s what Jon did. He approached the sexual assault survivor Dae..nerys for sex bc uwu they’re in love, and all that was talked about was the incest and boat sex. I don’t remember a criticism of Jon doing that. Guy shows up at your doorstep for sex and he’s in control of it? Gendrya did the opposite. Guy showed up at doorstep probably to confess love, girl takes control of what she wants.
Anyway tldr: Both characters had agency in this scene. Gendry had the agency to reject Arya’s advances, to stop them, she gave him the chance, he decided he wanted to continue and be naked. Arya had the agency over her sexuality, over her nudity, over her own virginity. Maisie had agency over her nudity, and it was so tastefully shot. Most actresses never get that.
And you know what? I liked it. I liked it a lot. Shout out to Maisie and Joe for doing so fucken fantastic. Shout out to Bryan Cogman and David Nutter for giving a shit about Maisie’s comfort. Shout out to Bryan Cogman for recognising parts of these characters. The fact it feels straight out of a fanfiction shows the general lovers of Arya, Gendry, and Gendrya felt it was done well. No shout out to Bryan for not giving more tact to the situation of Melisandre.
And you know what? It was.
Update: Wrote this in 2019 and it’s been stuck in my drafts since