a i j a

For a Thousand of Kindness

[ai-ja]

It's been already few days after Christmas, not even New Year yet. Come to think of it, it's been a while since the last time I wrote here.

Six years have passed.

People change and I might have changed as well.

Those intrusive thoughts, the voices (in my head) have felt so real, but lately been getting less and less affecting.

"Thank you for staying alive, thank you for standing strong, and thank you for still being you even after all things that happened. Be kind to people and to yourself, always and despite everything."

[ai-ja]

Halo

Hai diriku, Kamu yang sudah jatuh berulang kali, rapuh berkali-kali, dan bangkit terus lagi-lagi. Terima kasih untuk terus berjuang. Ingatlah, jiwamu adalah langit yang lapang dan ceria. Pemaaf dan bijak. Teruslah berbuat kebaikan dan teruslah berbahagia.

Hai kamu-diriku yang dulu, Terima kasih atas segala luka yang kau lewati. Semua airmata yang kau arungi. Lihatlah semua kesabaran itu, segala pertarungan itu membuatmu menjadi lebih kuat. Menjadi dirimu, diriku yang sekarang.

Hai aku di masa depan yang datang dalam sepersekian detik lagi, Bersyukurlah atas semua yang terjadi, segala yang dilewati, teruslah bersyukur. Ingatlah Tuhan selalu ada di jalanmu, melindungimu dan memberimu senyuman dengan cara yang tak pernah kau sangka, tidak diduga.

[ai-ja]

It’s amazing to know that: “Don’t text me during my vacation” means “I will be the one to text you first” and “Don’t call me during my vacation” means “I will be the one to call you first.”

[ai-ja]

The truth is I never stop loving you. I just stop letting myself get hurt because of loving you.

And one thing for sure: we aren’t supposed to hurt each other.

[thegirlwhocrieswolf]

langleav | Sea of Strangers

[ai-ja]

Pada sebuah garis waktu yang merangkak maju, akan ada saatnya kau bertemu dengan satu orang yang mengubah hidupmu untuk selamanya. Pada sebuah garis waktu yang merangkak maju, akan ada saatnya kau terbuka dan kehilangan pegangan. Pada sebuah garis waktu yang merangkak maju, akan ada saatnya kau ingin melompat mundur pada titik-titik kenangan tertentu. Maka, ikhlaskan saja kalau begitu. Karena sesungguhnya, yang lebih menyakitkan dari melepaskan sesuatu adalah berpegangan pada sesuatu yang menyakitimu secara perlahan.

Fiersa Besari, "Garis Waktu: Sebuah Perjalanan Menghapus Luka"

[ai-ja]

Terima kasih untuk kesempatan mengenalmu, itu adalah salah satu anugerah terbesar hidupku. Cinta memang tidak perlu ditemukan, cintalah yang akan menemukan kita. Terima kasih. Nasihat lama itu benar sekali. aku tidak akan menangis karena sesuatu telah berakhir, tapi aku akan tersenyum karena sesuatu itu pernah terjadi. Masa lalu, rasa sakit, masa depan. Mimpi-mimpi. Semua akan berlalu, seperti sungai yang mengalir. Maka biarlah hidupku mengalir seperti sungai kehidupan.

Tere Liye, "Tentang Kamu"

[ai-ja]

Work for Loyal Employers who value your talents, hard-work and loyalty!

I worked for a company for 3 years and only got two interviews for internal jobs I applied for. I never got promoted even though I was acting in the

Things I noted from the article that: Too many of us are hanging around in places, relationships, jobs where we are not being valued - where the life is literally being sucked out of us. Why? Because of fear or lack of confidence in ourselves and in our abilities. I do really love my job, my current job. Perhaps, I could even describe many things I love as a part of Project Control Management Team in an expat company, well... despite it's crazy working hours. Sadly, I couldn't say the same for my past relationships, the way I keep lingering to those toxic feelings. After jumping from one relationship to others, I realize that those feelings would keep haunting me if I didn't let them go with whole my heart, and say to myself: “Okay, hon. You deserve better and you can be happy without depending on things or others.” Period. And yash, I quoted: your value does not decrease based on someone's inability to see your worth. Now, I am totally happy with my life. Things in my life have taught me that yes, sometimes it is good to listen to other people's opinion, yet too much listening would just do no good to yourself. If the people around you only spread negative vibes and make your life even worse (both physically and mentally), just stay away from such toxic environment. Moreover, your real happiness is not based on either you are in relationship or not. Anyway, the above article is not about love. But it is worth reading! Really. Have a nice weekend!

[ai-ja]

Rejection doesn't mean you aren't good enough; it means the other person failed to notice what you have to offer.

Mark Amend

And so does the work.. as well as love.

[quotemadness]

Finding someone you can really connect with is like winning the lottery — It happens basically never, but if it does, you really shouldn’t blow it.

Jessica Verdi (via quotemadness)

[ai-ja]

Tuan, selesaikan urusanmu, cepatlah pulang. Aku mengantuk.

[ai-ja]

To you. Yes, you.. All of you

Thanks heaven! I found you.

Thank you for all those crazy things we've done together, for all the hugs and comfortness in the darkest times, for all laugh and tears in our shared stories, for getting me to the road where I could be a much better version of me than I was yesterday, for being next to me when I need the most, for a thousand of kindness.. for being you.

Thank you very much.

[ai-ja]

Judul, jika kamu mau

Lagi-lagi aku menulis tanpa judul. Kadang-kadang sudah separuh jalan barulah terpikirkan, "Mungkin aku perlu judul". Namun di detik-detik terakhir, setelah kata-kata saling mengikat menjadi cerita, yang ada di kepala hanyalah gumpalan awan tanpa nama.

Akhirnya ku kosongkan saja, tidak bersisa.

Dini hari ini, kusadari Tumblr dengan senang hati mengisi ruang kosong tanpa judul itu, samar-samar tertulis:

Judul, jika kamu mau

Aku mau, tapi tak tahu. *krik krik krik

[ai-ja]

Nang: Kamu wanita yang menakutkan.

Njay: Lalu?

Nang: Kamu tau apa yang menakutkan dari dirimu?

Njay: *menggelengkan kepala*

Nang: Karena kamu tau dengan jelas apa yang kamu inginkan.

[ai-ja]

Passion-art Life: His Brain and Her Heart

As Chinese Lunar New Year on 2018 will be on February 16th [which is a week to go], AIJA, with the help of AHK, proudly dwell into our passionate-imagination-comes-true.

New year, new plans, new projects. May God bless our will and our way.

©austijnkero

[ai-ja]

Life is a game and you are the player of your own game. Play to win is good for you. Either way, play till you get bored, but that would be the worst of all. Play with passion and that's the best art you can do in life, to match your fate. Make the best game of your own.

[ai-ja]

Ko,

I’ve never been lonely. Never once. Ever since we’ve parted our dreams God knows when.

I’m just sad. Merely sad. A kind of sad with simple signs of losing appetite and lack of sleep. That I need to watch sad movies or write a bunch of nonsense just to make sure a few drops of inks..and tears spilled over. To relieve what’s buried deep down here, in this shattered-into-the-dust heart. Fool, eh?

Felt like ages, yet letting go has never been like a walk in the park.