Angstpril 2025!! | Day 5: Memory Loss
Fandom: Love for Love's Sake / Love Supremacy Zone
Relationships: Cha Yeowoon/Tae Myung-ha
Ratings: Teens and Up Audiences
Warnings: Attempted suicide
The ocean stared at him, asking him what's wrong, pulling him in for a comforting hug.
He hesitates, the coldness of the water reaching his knees. It felt like a wake up call, to ease the tension plaguing him— it felt like an intervention.
But abandoning himself felt better.
—What if both Myung-ha and Yeowoon got transmigrated? After completing the mission, they both return to the real world, but Myung-ha forgets.
Tags: memory loss, attempted suicide, alternate universe, transmigration, adult characters, orphan
“You should have let it end there.” A voice interrupted the silence, and Myung-ha belatedly realized it was his.
“Now.. What's all this for?” The words flowed so easily out of his mouth, yet he knew he didn’t have control over it.
The scene in front of him seemed like a memory, yet he couldn’t remember anything remotely similar in his mind.
“You regretted it,” Another voice spoke, and in contrast to the hidden anger of his, this voice was somber— like it was sympathising with him.
“I'm just giving you a chance. I was hoping if you saw yourself from someone else's perspective, you would learn to love yourself.” The man couldn’t hide his melancholic smile. “I thought if you learned to love someone, you would be a little happier.”
Myung-ha wanted to scoff, but words came out before he could.
“Learn to love, and then what?” His eyes ached, lips trembling, but he faced the man with the words he finally wanted to say.
“Everything was over. Both my lives at 29 and 19.”
As he said those words, a slow medley whispers through the airless darkness. It gained his attention. But as he looked around the endless void, he couldn’t find its source.
He looks back to his Sunbae, wanting to ask of the sudden unwanted music. Only to find a blank space from where the man once stood.
And suddenly Myung-ha wakes up.
Blinking blearly, he whips his head to the side, finally recognising the soft medley that woke him up.
He sighs, pressing snooze as he lays on his back again.
He’s been having these dreams too often than he could count, and he frankly doesn’t care. If these dreams served as a premonition of something— well, it was annoying as hell.
He laughs, both out of pity and self deprecation.
He raises his arm as he covers it over his eyes, another manic laughter coming out of him.
The stair’s cold pavement didn’t shake his exhaustion, nor did the laughter of the people around him.
He sat there, staring at the starless night. The cold air caressed his face, as if to copy a hand gently nuzzled at his.
He remembers, but he doesn’t, of a hand cupping his face. He welcomed the feeling, he chased it, longed for it– but he doesn’t remember anyone holding him as preciously as those mysterious hands did.
His eyes traced the person’s arm, up to his face– but he couldn’t recognize the man. He tries to remember those eyes filled with tender devotion, an emotion he longed and craved, and he belatedly realized it was for him.
Yet he doesn’t remember, so he thinks it's just his brain’s way to make an escape for him, a way for him to be distracted.
He opens his eyes again as he lets out a sigh.
“It would be nice to have someone.” He mutters in the air, watching families pass by him, couples laughing with their hands interlocked, a kid running up to his mother– asking to be carried.
He tries to smile, to enjoy this beautiful night, but he feels he’s just grimacing– so he stops.
“It would be nice to have someone who cares by my side, someone who gives me chances when I fail and feel hopeless.” But he knows he can’t, and he knows he isn’t deserving of it.
From the corner of his eyes, he makes out a strip of light in the air.
He watches it pass by, leaving behind a crystal trail.
For the first time in the night, he smiles.
“I wish I’d disappear.” He wishes to the sky. As the star fades, so did his smile.
The shallow waters at the edge soaked his shoes. He can feel the sand and rocks piling underneath his insoles, an underwhelming but irritating feeling if he’s gonna be honest.
He tries to breathe in the salty air, but even such a simple task made him despise the sea even more. He wonders how his mother loved it here when all there was to it was saltwater and fishes.
He tried to love it, to please– or to let her see that Myung-ha was also her child, that they are similar in some ways.
Despite forcing himself, to change his life for the better, It was never enough– for him or time. There was never enough time, because he lost it all before he could even realise it was gone.
He tried a lot of things to redeem everything back– yet everything was taken from silently.
The ocean stared at him, asking him what's wrong, pulling him in for a comforting hug.
He hesitates, the coldness of the water reaching his knees. It felt like a wake up call, to ease the tension plaguing him— it felt like an intervention.
But abandoning himself felt better.
The sea merged with his body, quickly reaching his chest. The water felt nice brushing up his skin, filling him up with the warmth he always wanted.
From a distance, he could hear a shout–a discrepancy from the loud waves of the sea, but he ignores it. It's none of his business anyways.
The water finally reached his neck, and the feeling of being choked by life disappeared in an instant, replacing it with goosebumps.
The waters suddenly turned erratic, and the waves pushed him deeper into its depths.
The airways in his body relished the smell of sea water more than the water he coughs out. A hand behind his back soothes the pressure, rubbing it methodologically.
He swerves his head, facing the person supposedly there. He regrets that, as his vision suddenly darkened.
“Sunbae, don’t move too much. You just got out of the water, you still might feel lightheaded.” Worry echoed in the stranger’s voice, but he ignored that and focused more on the word he said.
He finally had a good look at the man. His dark hair rustled in the wind as he kneeled down beside him, his eyes worried as if looking away would make Myung-ha disappear— it's funny how expressive this person is despite meeting for the first time.
“Thank god I got here quickly, I— I almost lost you.” The man’s eyes reddened slightly, but he quickly masked it over with a pout. The man opened his arms as he engulfed Myung-ha in a hug. Snapping out of his thoughts, he pushed the stranger off immediately.
“The hell?” Myung-ha said, his voice filled with confusion and anger. “Who are you? Why’re you hugging me a— and calling me your Sunbae? I don’t have a Hoobae with your face.”
The sand quickly sticks to his body, and it was starting to annoy him.
The man just stared at Myung-ha, stunned by his actions.
“Sunbae.. Do you not remember me?”
“No, and I don’t think I had brain damage since I remember my childhood up until now.” He spat, standing up as he dusted off the sand of his pants. Great, now his attempt failed by someone who had mistaken him for someone he knew.
But at the back of his mind, those expressive eyes and his touch sparked something in him— recognition? familiarity? But he doesn’t know the man in front of him.
He tsk’ed, walking away from the kneeled man.
He’ll continue it next time.
