poesia

ang mga letra at salitang nakalapat dito ang aking mga hinanakit at mga salitang di ko mailapat sa aking dila; bawat tula ay ibang sakit ang hatid ngunit karamihan ng tulang nailathala ay para sa iisang taong aking sinisinta; mga ilang opinyon at nagaganap na pangyayari sa aking buhay ay dito ko ring ilalahathala. At kung meron mang makatagpo ng aking blog ika'y hinihikayat ko na wag na itong basahin dahil ito ay tungkol saaking mga damdamin na nakaaukit sa akin puso't isip ngunit di maisabi at maipadama dahil ako'y duwag.  

[alexkshu]

I can't cry anymore but help me God to overcome this. I know that I am hurting but I don't know how to cope up witht his.

I know he is hurting but I don't know how could he explain to me everything, his mind has shut down.

All I want is an explanation. Please help me Lord.

[alexkshu]

https://open.spotify.com/album/4MAvj1GAKdPhtQiqIEoaGd?si=V4FSnd-dTtG7sZvzkycj0w

Right now, all I have is you God.

Help me heal, help me heal.

Help me love my self more.

Help me forgive myself and him.

Help me understand things.

Help me overcome this.

[alexkshu]

Lord,

I surrender everything. Whatever the outcome is, its all up to you. I surrender everything. I know my heart what it wants but if he does not want it. I understand. I fully understand.

Whatever happens, I surrender it upon you.

Jeremiah 29:11 : "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"

My heart may cry for help, for sorrow, and for mourn - but I trust you. I trust whatever you would like me to do.

It might be hard, but, whatever it is -- might break me or might satisfy me. But whatever it is, the glory is all yours.

[alexkshu]

We're in a moment of uncertainty. I believe this is our make-or-break moment, and I sincerely hope for a positive outcome. Regardless of where life takes us, I thanked God for this experience. Please be cautious; I am fragile enough to let go and break this momentum.

[alexkshu]

I don't know what to write, but I needed to release this emotion. I can't dump it all on my friend.

I am still haunted by the fact that the moment I left - it would be the end of us. I knew that from the very beginning since you came back to my senses. But, are you sure you're not fighting for us babe? I know that you're fixing yourself why does it feel that you're fading away. I know that I am the one who told you that we need to fix ourselves before delving into a relationship, and you told me to wait no matter what but why I feel that you're fading away as well as what you've felt to me. Can you tell me, what went wrong? I know we havent spoke since then but we know that were meeting halfway and groping for the emotions that we have - what went wrong? Can you please talk to me, and maybe we can talk this out - we dont need to force ourselves to have something but we can talk how to make things work in the future. I hate that were falling apart and still don't know how to communicate with our feelings.

[alexkshu]

solitude

[alexkshu]

please Lord, please help me - us, to be free from this hellhole.

pa-graduate-in niyo ako ng 2026.

please let it be my year.

[alexkshu]

ano kaya pakiramdam ng may pangarap?

ang hirap pag naka-hang lang yung buhay mo at any time pwede ka mag-fail.

nahihirapan na ako huminga eh, tangina bakit ganito?

[alexkshu]

i don't want to go through this pain, again and again

if you don't want me, just please. please let me go.

[alexkshu]

please let me go

[alexkshu]

Carson,

I'd still cry for you - no one can understand how you have a special place here in my heart. You represent my soul when it comes to love; loving somebody without asking for reciprocation is brave-and that's what you do, and offer. You don't need to be loved back, as long as the person you love is happy - even if that happiness in romance doesn't count as the love that you gave.

You taught me how to love someone dearly without asking it back, You taught me how to be selfless just to be around a person that doesn't know how to look back or even to look at what it feels like to be loved by you.

Hopefully, someday, we will get the love we deserve so that our love can be reciprocated and appreciated.

You are brave, Carson. I hope someone can be as brave as you to you.

[alexkshu]

We're dealing with ourselves today; we don't know what the future holds but I am really hoping that soon we'll conquer the world, together.

[alexkshu]

7 years

Dio and Carson, its been 7 years and I'm still here.

I'd still cry for you, carson, cheers to the love we've given and not been reciprocated.

Dio, 'di mo naman kasalanan - pero tangina, hindi ba, kahit minsan, kahit saglit, 'di ba sumagi sa isip mo na mahalin rin si carson?

Dio..

[alexkshu]

unclear

01062024

pang-anim na araw pa lang ng taon, pero gulong gulo ako.

ang daming bagay na gusto kong mangyari pero ang daming hadlang. gusto ko lang naman sumaya, pero bakit parang hindi pwede?

gusto ko magbakasyon ng payapa pero hindi pwede kasi may research kami na kailangan ulitin - hindi naging sapat yung unang gawa namin , na kesyo mali ganito ganyan. yung isang sem ko andoon, pero nabalewala lang. pagod na ako.

gusto ko lang makita yung seventeen, inayos ko yung schedule ko na hindi matatamaan yung concert dates [ saturday sunday ] pero tangina nabago rin yung exam schedule kasi may holiday, gusto ko lang kayo makita ng payapa, bakit parang hindi pwede?

parang awa naman Universe, pagbigyan mo na ako. kahit sa ganitong pagkakataon lang pagbigyan mo ako, kahit makita lang yung seventeen at mapirmahan yung papel namin.

ito lang, parang awa mo na. kinuha mo na yung pangarap ko, baka pwedeng ito naman pagbigyan mo.

[alexkshu]

its different, when you're not the only one who is drifting apart but our worlds too.

why is it hard to hold on?

[alexkshu]

To the love we lost.

5 years, In those years we felt a roller coaster of emotions--but luckily the most dominant emotion that I've felt is to be loved. Loved by you. However, this dominant emotion caused us bruises and wound that I don't know how to mend and treat. The wound that it left, makes me anxious because who knows whose wound would heal first. It scares me to know that the most beautiful emotion that you gave to me would be given to someone else.

How could I ever forget the most wonderful years that I had with you, if I can still remember the worse days of my life? 5 years... I can't believe that it's really over for us. H

[alexkshu]

Leap of Faith

With a leap of faith, I surrender upon you Lord. Please help me to survive the remaining weeks that we have. Please let me in. PLM BSA please Lord ;-;