jess @all-thats-known - Tumblr Blog

mr brunner: percy, there is no ms. dodds on this trip. as far as i know, there has never been a ms. dodds at yancy academy. are you feeling alright??

percy:

percy: what kind of “there is no war in ba sing se” bullshit is this i just KILLED my pre algebra teacher please just tell me what’s going on

stardustschild

Apparently my director went to see a production of West Side Story a few years ago, and the guy playing Chino forgot his gun before coming out for his final scene. Once it got to the big scene where he is supposed to shoot Tony, he screeched “Poison Boots” and kicked the actor playing Tony until he went down. The girl playing Maria then had to jerk the shoe off of Chino’s foot, and had to do the gunshot scene asking “How many kicks Chino? How many kicks, and one kick left for me”.

tbbackus

There should be a blog dedicated to theatrical urban legends. Like that opening weekend of Dracula where Dracula (still hungover) vomited all over the audience during the first stage direction that everyone has a friend of a friend that worked on the show and was there.

crutchie-morris

or the one where the bridge never came out for Javert’s suicide and so he just pretended to stab himself and then lay there until the lights went out

musicofthestage

best story i heard was when a friend of mine saw a show where juliet forgot to bring the dagger out on stage so she just ripped the squib out of her chest and blood squirted everywhere

agatharights

During a passion play a friend of my brother was supposedly in, one of the roman soldiers who was supposed to stab jesus on the cross and accidentally grabbed the wrong spear- he was supposed to grab one with a fake tip, but instead he grabbed one with an actual metal tip and, well

Jesus screamed “JESUS CHRIST YOU STABBED ME”.

Since that Jesus had to be taken down due to a bad case of stab-itis, the backup Jesus came in, but he weighed significantly less than the original Jesus- which would have been fine, except that at the end the cross was supposed to ascend upwards with Jesus on it, and the weights hadn’t been adjusted.

So Jesus, instead, ROCKETED UP into heaven (or, just, above the stage).

soulpunchftw

This is wild from start to finish

totalspiffage

I was in Peter Pan once and one night at a performance, the adhesive holding our Hook’s mustache on was wearing off. It was near the end with a big fight scene and when he got attacked, he let his mustache fall and went “YOU RIPPED MY MUSTACHE OFF!” in a scandalized tone and it added a new note of hilarity to the whole scene (which was supposed to be funny anyway)

punkbatsarchive

In my seventh grade play, which was a midsummer night’s dream, Thisbe didn’t have a sword so she stabbed herself with a coathanger

redheadeddisneyfreak

My junior year we were doing Romeo and Juliet and after Juliet poisons herself it was supposed to go dark and she’d get off the stage. well the light crew accidentally turned them back on and Juliet who was sitting up slammed back down on the wooden bed with a loud bang. To which my theater teacher says into the com “zombie Juliet” and everyone who heard that had to keep as quiet as possible while our eyes were filling with tears.

sammywhatammy

i attended my county’s performing arts high school majoring in vocal studies, (mostly geared towards musical theater and opera styles) and once a year we got a field trip to new york (we were in jersey, so it’s not exactly far). we would do one touristy thing, an actor’s workshop with friends of our teachers working in various performing industries in nyc, and then see a show.

my first year doing this, our industry contacts were 1 actor, 1 casting director, and 1 producer to get different aspects of the business, and they all gave us amazing advice and told fantastic stories. the actor in question was Zazu on Broadway’s The Lion King for several years, and told the best story by far.

in The Lion King, there are only two pieces of pre-recorded noise in the whole show. one, when Pumbaa does a MASSIVE fart while fighting the hyenas, and the other being Mufasa saying REMEMBERRRRRR as Simba climbs Pride Rock. the actor told us while struggling not to laugh that, during one night’s performance, someone forgot to flip the tape of these pre-recorded noises.

so, at the end of the show, the great climax where Simba finally accepts his place in the Circle of Life, the heavens parted and-

PFFFFFFFFFRRRRRBTFTBTBFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

everyone froze. and then all ran off stage positively HOWLING with laughter.

the lesson: sometimes there are fuck ups you just can’t recover from.

cinder-ember

During a high school production of Beauty and the Beast, where I was assistant costumer and assistant prop master, our director decided that we needed to spice up Gaston’s introduction. You know: in the movie, when Lefou runs in trying to catch the duck/goose that Gaston has just shot out of the sky?

Originally, the actors were going to stroll on stage with our Lefou hauling in the really neat (and real!) taxidermied deer head that we had found in a local thrift store. Now, two days before opening night, our director wants Lefou to run in from off stage and catch a stuffed duck that Gaston has just shot. This, of course, requires two things to work properly as a scene: a gunshot noise, and a stuffed duck.

The gunshot noise, we had covered. Blue-collar, redneck school? Guns a plenty to record. The stuffed duck? Harder than you might have thought to obtain.

Three hunting stores, two taxidermists, and one Pet Supply Store ™, I’d finally found a semi-realistic pheasant squeaky toy. What follows is an account of the ways this dog toy managed to be the nightmare prop of the six show run.

Opening Night: The stagehand, who was supposed to drop the bird from the ceiling catwalk, missed his cue and didn’t drop the it. Lefou’s actor rolls with it and does an excellent job of looking around foolishly before getting cuffed upside the head by Gaston. The stagehand then drops the bird squarely on Gaston’s head. Cue laughter.

Saturday Matinee: Different stagehand throws the bird instead of dropping it and beans Lefou directly in the face with the prop. Lefou falls over. Cue laughter.

Saturday Night: Bird is missing during curtain call. Director hauls the deer head down from it’s place on the tavern wall and tells Gaston and Lefou to revert to the old blocking i.e. no gunshot, no bird, just walk in with trophy. During Gaston and Lefou’s conversation, gun shot sound goes off and a stagehand throws the bird onto the stage…from the wrong side of the stage. Lefou and Gaston stare at it in awkward silence for a solid thirty seconds before Lefou makes off-script, subtle joke about Gaston’s gun going off late instead of early. Cue adults in the audience laughing.

Sunday Matinee: Director begs the stagehands to get the cue right at least once. Gunshot and bird prop go off without a hitch. Lefou accidentally catches the prop when it falls from the catwalk. He’s so startled that he caught it that Gaston runs right in to him. They drop both the gun and the bird props, and grab the wrong prop in their scramble. Gaston spends the rest of the scene gesturing dramatically with a stuffed pheasant, instead of a gun.

Sunday Night: Director is fed up with bird prop, decides that Lefou should just carry bird prop in after gunshot happens off stage. Lefou accidentally squeezes the prop during the intro conversation, startling both actors into silence with the squeaky toy noise - apparently, neither of them realized it was a dog toy.

Monday Elementary School Show: Lefou walks on stage with the bird. Accidentally drops the prop during conversation with Gaston. Gaston doesn’t notice the dropped prop and steps on it. Cue depressingly sad squeaky toy noise. Cue ten years olds laughing.

fat-hippie

I was in Twelfth Night during high school and we were lucky enough to have identical twin girls playing Viola and Sebastian. Due to the blocking in the first half of the play, their characters didn’t appear on stage together but rather almost consecutively one after the other for a majority of the first act.

It was awesome because when people saw the play and didn’t know the girls were identical twins, it literally looked like it was one actor doing multiple, uber fast costume changes.

One of our first performances was for our peers and it was a big school so lots of people didn’t know the twins. This - for some reason - was also the performance they chose to record.

Listening to the confusion of the audience during the playback was fantastic and completely topped by the moment Viola walked off stage left just as Sebastian walked on stage right and someone right beside the camera goes “OH WHAT THE FUCK” so loudly it drowned out everything else.

The best thing? That was the copy of the play that was made available for purchase by family and parents. Haha.

whereismyvillage

Oh my god. I went to one of the Spiderman shows where he flew out above the audience and then got stuck and had to awkwardly hang there for about 10 minutes, but these stories are brilliant.

andthereisnotragedyinthat

okay so, my senior year of high school and I’m part of the stage crew for Peter Pan. There’s a scene where Hook and Smee are searching for Peter and the Lost Boys. Now the theater department at my high school isn’t very well funded (in the southern USA, football is king), so the sets we managed to make were pretty kickass for the money we had. We had a structure painted like a big tree stump for the entrance to the Lost Boys’ hideout. You could climb to the top of it, but also go inside it through a trap door that we kept locked up during most of the play.

It’s like our third show and everything has been going surprisingly well. Hook and Smee climb to the top of the “tree trunk”, supposedly looking for Peter and not knowing they’re standing above his hiding spot the whole time.

Turns out someone didn’t close the trapdoor properly, because the second Hook steps on it, he plunges through the thing. He’s able to catch himself, but he’s got his ass and one leg dangling through this hole where it’s like a ten foot drop to the ground. All of us stage crew are literally two feet away from him offstage, just gaping at him because???? Y'all this fall looked BAD. Looked like my dude did the splits in mid air. The whiplash caused his fucking wig to come off. The audience is dead silent, all of us backstage are dead silent, the director is like already looking up how to treat a broken groin.

The kid who was playing Hook was like a fuckin sophomore and he KILLED it. He gave himself a second to catch his breath, never broke character, just looked up at his castmate and growled “Smee, you fool, help me up!”. He ended up playing off the wig thing as an embarrassing comedic bit for Hook, and the play went on. He was completely fine. It was the best thing I’d ever seen.

squidspawn

There was an infamous performance of the opera Don Giovanni where in the last act Giovanni was suppose to be dragged into hell via trapdoor but the overweight actor got stuck, leading someone from the audience to shout: “Hey everyone, Hell’s full!!”

sarahviehmann

I’m pretty sure I’ve reblogged this before but the Lefou story has me in tears every time.

dwlostcompanion

As someone who did Tech stuff in High school for 4 years, Lefou!

five-very-happy-years

I was a costumer on a stage version of Titanic, and in the scene where the women and children are getting in the lifeboats, one of the men (who was supposed to be saying goodbye to his wife he knows he will never see again because his is about to die), realized his fake mustache was falling off and instead of playing it cool… he rips it off his face, and hands it to his wife with the line “Something to remember me by”…it was the funniest thing that I have ever seen in my 8 years in theatre, the entire cast lost their shit laughing at the most dramatic moment possible

edensgardener

I am laughing so hard I’ve been crying for ten minutes. Thank you

#this is so funny #im crying

romangod

CAMP HALF-BLOOD | Brand exploration | PART 2

Continuing my brand exploration project, here are the business cards and additional brand elements! In this set I included some graphic elements to be used throughout the brand and collateral. Short and sweet but I have so many ideas and things I want to cover, they will make more sense in separate posts.

[PART 1]

ghostlypawn

alice spencer + the five stages of grief

rustic-space-fiddle

So I loved Bandstand before I even managed to see a coherent performance and now I’ve finally seen one and I am w e e p i n g

jasonsscar

i know that we will never get more percy jackson musicals from the original cast. or maybe ever. so, i just want to make a post about iconic moments in the books and the kinds of songs ive imagined we could’ve gotten if it happened

Sea of Monsters

Percy’s weird dream at the beginning

Tyson having a solo. I’m-

Imagine if we got a ballad for Clarisse here

Tantalus and Percy just being like “fuck you” the whole time

WHEN THEY RUN INTO THE SIREN’S. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO GOOD

Circe’s Island

Guinea pig Percy. Don’t talk to me.

If we got DOA when they entered the underworld. Imagine what we would’ve got when they entered Polyphemus’s cave.

The final song with Thalia waking up and then the song arubtly ending and that’s how the musical ends. I’m not okay.

The Titan’s Curse

PERCY AND ANNABETH DANCING TOGETHER. NO SONG BUT I M A G I N E.

Intense singing and then Annabeth is gone when they save the di Angelo kids

OKAY. NICO SINGING TO PERCY ABOUT MYTHOMAGIC CARDS. IDBKADJ

Artemis singing the rules of the hunters of artemis

Thalia and Percy fighting/singing battle

Nico making Percy promise to protect Bianca on the quest. Really good song I bet. Short. But sweet.

The entire dam sequence. Has the same vibes as “Drive”

WHEN PERCY MEETS APHRODITE. PL E A S E

The audience knows. Everyone knows he’s in love with annabeth.

Percy coming back and telling nico about Bianca. AND THEN NICO SINGS ABOUT HOW HE PROMISED AND WE GET THE SAME INSTRUMENTALS FROM WHEN HE MADE PERCY PROMISE THE FIRST TIME.

Percy and annabeth dancing at the end to a song Percy’s singing that he is always going to protect annabeth but she can’t hear him because it’s an inner monologue

The Battle of the Labyrinth

Percy going to orientation and he becomes friends with Rachel. RaCHEL WOULD HAVE THE COOLEST VOICE. YOU CANNOT CHANGE MY MIND.

WAIT. PAUL BLOFIS. MY MAN. GETTING A SOLO. SINGING ABOUT HOW HE WANTS PERCY TO DO WELL. GENUINE CONFUSION FROM WHEN HELL BREAKS LOOSE AT SCHOOL.

Annabeth singing about how she does NOT like Rachel. But in a very sarcastic way.

When they find the Labyrinth. Mini duet song from percabeth. Sbaksb.

More Tyson singing?? But like softly in the background throughout the quest

When they meet Janus that song would be so fun omg

AND THE SPHYNX TOO

When Percy sees Nico giving the dead McDonalds?? I’m sorry that would be so funny and like sad at the same time. It would be one of the best songs.

The kiss on Mt. St. Helens. Need I say more

Calypso and Percy. Calypso would have a ballad song about how she is cursed to fall in love with every hero and how they always leave. And Percy is like “damn that sucks” the whole song so it’s not even that sad but we are feeling for calypso

Percy walking in on his own funeral would be wild in a musical lmfao

Daedalus would have the COOLEST techno song?? I can’t imagine it any other way. Someone please work with me to write the music for this musical. I’m begging you.

Pan’s song would be so sad omg. I’m crying thinking about it.

At the end it’s Percy singing alone on his birthday and then Nico appears in the song and interrupts Percy. And Percy invites him in. Ugh. So good.

The Last Olympian

Rachel starts off this musical and don’t try and convince me otherwise.

DON’T TALK TO ME. CHARLES BECKENDORF BASS VOICE. I’M SCREAMING.

And it’s a GOOD song about them invading The Princess Andromeda.

But we will never see him again but he had a good run with that song

Percy learning his prophecy. Imagine the song being so chilling and serious. It sends shivers down your spine and then the song ends with Percy’s voice cutting in after a couple seconds with “what?”

May Castellan. I don’t want to talk about but you guys know what’s up.

There was originally a song that the creator of the musical talks about that he cut out where Clarisse and Selena are arguing about who’s side they would be on if there was a war. I want that vibe of that song HERE.

The River of Styx. It’s so emotional about how he sees Annabeth sbaksb

When they’re in war already and Annabeth takes that stab. AM I THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS HAPPENING?? Her laying at base and singing to Percy. AAAAA

Okay hear me out. When Selena comes in as Clarisse to fight. The original “Put You In Your Place” music comes on here. But Percy knows it’s wrong because it’s not Clarisse’s voice

Kronos’s songs would be SO badass

Percy summoning his father to join the fight

Percy summoning that HURRICANE. The amount of toilet paper this would need oml

Luke dying would be so tragic in the musical. Annabeth and Luke duet. Eugh.

Rachel becoming the new oracle.

Annabeth singing to Percy happy birthday and they get thrown in the lake but it would be different cause there is no lake. But it’s the campers singing a cute mocking song about the two lovebirds

It ends with the same vibe as “Bring on the Monsters” but we’re all crying instead because it’s over.

I KNOW I MISSED A LOT OF MOMENTS BUT IF YOU GUYS HAVE ANYMORE YOU THINK WOULD BE AWESOME PLEASE ADD THEM IN. I KNOW ITLL NEVER BE POSSIBLE BUT WE CAN DREAM!’

forr-everrmorre

my favorite things about the Anastasia OBC recording

the ensemble singing those lines from The Neva Flows with Ramin FUCKING Karimloo Gleb talking on top of it

“They can call it LeninGRAD, but it’ll always BE Petersburg!”

the large collective “shhh” at the end of A Rumor In St. Petersburg

the way Christy sings “and I hear a voice whisper I’ll meet you right there” that line will actually be the death of me tbfh

everything about Learn To Do It

yes, I mean everything

“Am I floating?” “Like a sinking boat”

“I’VE HAD IT and I hate you both, I’m sorry that we ever met!”

Ramin Karimloo is just great ok

“Could I have pulled the trigger if I’d been told?”

My Petersburg is a blessing

“…but tonight, there’s a sky and quiiiite a view”

the background harmonies in the middle of Once Upon A December cleansed my soul

all the harmonies in Stay I Pray You are blessed

“this chaaance” “this chaaance” “is allllllllllll” “is allllllllll I’ve gooooooot, keep a grip and take a deep breath and”

the end of We’ll Go From There is so pure

Ramin Karimloo

“a son becomes a man at his father’s kneeeeee”

“I’m innocent she cries but then you see her eyes and something in them tells you that she absolutely liiiiiiiies”

tbh Ramin could punch me in the face and I’d thank him

Journey To The Past is just iconic k

“Home, love, faaaaamily”

Lees verder

muppetmagic

crickets wander, murmuring

#alice by heart #spring awakening

eposettelesbian

epilogue, les misérables // light, next to normal // road to hell (reprise), hadestown // those you’ve known, spring awakening

tango-marvin

Just Deaf West Spring Awakening Things

Wendla’s heartbreaking “Mama Who Bore Me” and “Why didn’t you tell me everything????” because not only is her mother keeping the facts of life from her, but there’s also a Deaf/hearing barrier

Also this is like 10 years after sign language was banned all over the world in school so the teacher and Melchior don’t sign in class, and the teachers fail Moritz just like they failed Deaf kids who couldn’t speak. Mortiz’s father is also Deaf which makes his anguish even more poignant.

Wendla’s voice grabbing her hand as they march off together sassily

Martha is Deaf because she keeps quiet about her abuse. Ilse is not because she does tell (and then get kicks out)

“Mariana Wheelin” **Anna (Ali Stroker) wheels by, giving him the hand**

Everyone rolling around on the floor during “Touch Me”

Everyone signing “I don’t feel anything!” with Wendla

Wendla’s voice handing her the switch and then later picking it up and hugging her

Moritz and Otto, who are both Deaf, signing “You start to ask, can’t hear a word”

Just all of the girls joining Martha in Ilse in “The Dark I Know Well” and all of the boys joining Moritz in “And Then There Were None.” Both on the bed. Because the problems are at home.

There’s actual hay in the hayloft!!

Melchoir signing “forgive me” to Wendla, using her hand

Wendla’s voice getting closer and closer to her during the sex scene

Moritz’s scarf

“cuz you know” **JUMP** “I don’t do sadneeesssss!”

Moritz’s voice HANDING HIM THE GUN

The explicit signs like “fucked” is middle fingers pointing at their heads

The girls jumping around on the floor like groupies with the guys on the edge of the stage during “Totally Fucked”

Hanschen just mooning everyone in “Totally Fucked”

Hanschen “skimming off the cream” by sucking on his middle finger; Ernst moves away but then his voice hits high dissonant notes on the piano

Hanschen sliding closer on the piano, signing “your bruise” on Ernst before kissing him, leaning back dramatically for “I know,” moving Ernst’s arm to sign together…this scene is SO GOOD in this version, way more serious and intimate

Idk why but Melchior’s “Child??” at the reform school is so much more poignant when signed

All of the kids lining up to support Melchior and repeating “not gone” at the end of “Those You’ve Known”

just how much the cast loves and supports each other and help each other with accessibility!!!

agentmcfly24601

You: Ryan Gosling did his own piano-playing in La La Land

Me, an intellectual: Corey Cott did his own piano-playing in Bandstand

orpheusmyth-deactivated20200916

the earth will wave with corn. the day so wide, so warm. and mares will neigh with stallions that they mate, foals they’ve borne and all shall know the wonder. i will sing the song of purple summer.

deaf west theatre’s spring awakening (2015-2016) dir. michael arden and spencer liff

ladyproserpinas

persephone: please stop turning our home into an industrial wasteland and maybe i’d want to be here more

hades:

reynaisalesbian

percy literally routinely gets distracted by how hot annabeth is in battle and u think he’d SURVIVE it if she took to strapping a dagger to her thigh ?

reynaisalesbian

like u KNOW some monster or other crashes senior prom and percy’s like oh can i not have ONE DAY and annabeth’s like no babe dw i got it it’s fine and whips out a dagger and cuts off the bottom of her dress & before percy can even think to help her she’s killed it and percy’s just like

reynaisalesbian

one thing that NEVER fails to crack me up about the lightning thief is how everyone is like oh haha percy is so SLOW on the uptake, but it’s ABSOLUTELY not his fault nobody explains SHIT to him lol

reynaisalesbian

percy: hi mr brunner

chiron: oh that’s not my name actually

percy: um okay. does mr d stand for something?

dionysus: names are powerful things. you don’t just go around using them for no reason.

reynaisalesbian

percy: can someone tell me what the hell is going on

chiron: did ur mom not tell u anything?

percy’s mom: *is now dead, had been keeping secrets because it was dangerous to tell him which chiron should KNOW because HE DID THE SAME THING

reynaisalesbian

*percy sees the oracle* what’s up there?

chiron: not a single living thing