※ STARKID’S THE GUY WHO DIDN’T LIKE MUSICALS ※
starters from starkid’s new musical the guy who didn’t like musicals ! feel free to change names/pronouns/places/etc !
“The apotheosis is upon us.”
“He’s destined to go viral.”
“He definitely won’t like this.”
“I don’t want to, though.”
“Sweetheart, it’s… cuddle night.”
“Don’t you think I’m tired, too?”
“Maybe tomorrow night then, huh?”
“I’m sorry, you can’t smoke in here.”
“She thinks you’re cool. Maybe you could talk me up a bit.”
“You’d rather do nothing than come with us to see Mamma Mia.”
“I’d rather do anything than go see Mamma Mia.”
“The idea of sitting there, trapped, in a musical, that is my own personal hell.”
“I don’t wanna show you up.”
“I don’t wanna give my money to some corporate chain.”
“I don’t wanna disturb anyone.”
“Did you do that to be nice or did you do it to be an asshole?”
“Oh, no, what am I gonna do without that dollar that I have to split with five other people?”
“I still haven’t gotten my hot chocolate.”
“I have very low blood sugar.”
“I just tipped because, you know… people should tip.”
“Not that you’re an asshole. Well, maybe you are.”
“Oh, no, that’s for you. I don’t give a shit about them.”
“I think I had to see that. I did not like it.”
“Some things are worth it.”
“I see you in here all the time, don’t I?”
“This has to be the last time.”
“You’re such an asshole, but that uniform is so fucking sexy.”
“If anyone thinks that makes me less of a man, they can talk to my fucking gun!”
“Are you sure you don’t want me to pick you up?”
“Come on, you bastard! You don’t think I’m ready for you?”
“What the fuck was that?”
“What’s happening? I’m very confused and concerned by all of this.”
“We get there, and the whole theater was exploded by a god dang meteor!”
“You got enough coffee in the sugar?”
“Is today some kind of, I don’t know, Canadian holiday or something?”
“I just have a bad feeling about all of this.”
“I don’t know why, but it frightened me.”
“What’s that one concrete goal that motivates all your actions?”
“I don’t know, I want money..?”
“A man so vague just can’t be trusted.”
“This seems like a private moment. Like, who is this for?”
“I forgot what I wanted to say.”
“Please, God, I just want a black coffee!”
“You’re talking to me, like a normal person.”
“I think there’s something terribly wrong with the world today.”
“It is scary, if you think about the implications. Promise me you’ll think about the implications.”
“Whose decision was it to line an alleyway with tons of shrubs?”
“There’s a dead end here, so… just go the other way again.”
“I know this is probably a bad time, but, uh, do you like film?”
“You were right. I didn’t think about the implications.”
“If you want to stay in our hiding spot, you’ve gotta stay quiet.”
“You grabbed the wrong one, you noodle!”
“I don’t need to see it, thank you.”
“I theorized this exact scenario thirty years ago.”
“Look no further than my robot assistant, Alexa.”
“Do you have anything to take the edge off, like… drink - or something?”
“I love him. I know I shouldn’t, but I do.”
“Where am I? Why am I tied to a chair?”
“I really don’t wanna die alone in here.”
“How the hell am I supposed to make a Shirley Temple without any cherries?”
“If it’s as serious as all that, I figured we might need a designated driver.”
“If you make one more crack at me, I am gonna… do something to you!”
“I’m gonna kick your- head!”
“I wanna see you kick above your waist.”
“Okay, it was a dumb threat, stop rubbing it in.”
“This is supposed to relax us, not make us kill each other.”
“Weed’s the future. It’s gonna be legal nationwide soon, bet you any money…!”
“Sing the beginning of Moana!”
“I didn’t like that movie.”
“Alright. That was terrible.”
“Right now, you need to run and hide.”
“Everything’s going to be fine.”
“I knew we were gonna need a designated driver!”
“You screaming is gonna get us killed.”
“What was I supposed to do? Lie?”
“Whatever I said this morning, I’m sorry.”
“We need to leave right now.”
“Why does it hurt to love you?”
“Wear a watch! Time is a precious thread in the fabric of the universe! It deserves its own tool of measurement!”
“I was trying to save something that could not be saved.”
“I don’t think it can do that…”
“If they hear us, they will kill us!”
“This song’s pretty good, huh?”
“Last week feels like ages ago.”
“Five o’clock can’t come soon enough.”
“We’ve gotta get out of here while they’re distracted!”
“I say I’d be a better person, I’m still not a good person!”
“I hate to say this right now, but this is what seatbelts are for.”
“I don’t know your friends’ fucking names…!”
“Our coffee was shit ‘cause we didn’t care.”
“Is my integrity worth anything at all?”
“You’re sure there were no other survivors?”
“Don’t you want to see me happy?”
“Can I - can I use your phone, please?”
