When youâre depressed (or anxious, or triggered), staying in all weekend, not answering the phone, binge-watching TV, and not getting dressed sounds great. It might even sound like âself-care.â And aspects of it can be self-care. But self-care is not just about soothing yourself in the moment, itâs about setting up the supports and structures that let you be okay enough in your day-to-day life. So while depression says âletâs watch Buffy instead of doing the laundryâ the reality is that tomorrow youâre going to wake up to clothes everywhere, nothing clean, and one more thing you havenât doneâwhich will add to the guilt and shame that seem to come hand-in-hand with depression.
On the other hand, depression-challenging behaviours are hard and not fun in the moment, but set you up to a) have small victories (SO important when dealing with mental health issues), b) have some structure and routine in your life, and c) set up the support and structure to let you deal with the root of your issues or cope with issues that arenât going away anytime soon.