anything and everything.

when im dead, throw me in the trash.

[blameaspartame-deactivated20200]

One pig

[pointnclick]

Horgsville

[imposterogers]

me, charging any random cat i see: cat!!!!

cat: *fucking books it*

me, hulk voice: FRIEND STAY

[tremblegay]

it’s oingo or be boingo’d on this bitch of an earth

[unclefather]

me in a pet store: i’d like to speak with your manager

cashier: what’s the problem?

me: you have ratatollie over there in a cage with no equipment… nothing to cook… you think these are fair living conditions? he lives to cook

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[bring-the-homo]

I’m v offended I haven’t seen some of those in the rip vine videos so I made my own

[universi-tea]

airport security is like when you’re trying to put your money back in your wallet before it’s the next person’s turn in line except you’re barefoot 

[smosh]

[watershalation-deactivated20191]

why are there so many days?? i feel like we just had a whole day yesterday… they don’t stop

[foreverimthatgirl-deactivated20]

[aprilwitching-deactivated201808]

candles are how we keep fires as pets

[annabellioncourt]

this is unnecessarily adorable

[just-shower-thoughts]

Nobody wants to work during the weekend, but our society wouldn’t function without those who do. Props to those Saturday afternoon cashiers.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Fitbits are just like Tamagotchis, except the stupid little creature you have to keep alive is yourself.

[im-the-batmann]

[sejient]

this is the most unsettling episode of cutthroat kitchen i have ever seen

[one-in-lemillion]

Please,,,you can’t leave us hanging like this what’s the name and episode number

[canalsobemoe]

season 4, episode 2, you wanna pizza this?

[unpretty]

i turned on the light in the dining room but Tubby had been sleeping in a chair and it woke her up and she was Not Pleased

[unpretty]

[lumnch]

[zagreus]

there is honestly nothing more gorgeously tacky than bowling alley carpet

[zagreus]

Don’t even talk to me if all of your clothes aren’t made out of bowling alley carpet