God Spousal- An Overview
Hello! Happy Venus Day! ✴️
This is the first educational post I've made in our little community but I figured I'd share it here too.
This post is far from comprehensive, but it will provide you with some insight and resources that you can dive deeper into if you’re interested. This is specifically about God-Spousal and Sacred Marriage, I will be writing other posts in the future about related topics like trickster spirits, religious psychosis, etc, so be sure to pop by to see those.
Buckle up because this is a long one.
So what even is “God- Spousal” ?
In essence, God- Spousal is the practice of courting a deity, god, spirit, or demon in an intimate, usually romantic and erotic manner.
It’s important to distinguish between our modern understanding of “god-spousal” (and even spousal in general), and the historical understanding of “sacred marriage” as it was practiced by ancient peoples.
Historically speaking, Sacred Marriage was usually performed between deities and humans of high ranking or authority (king, priest/priestess) to establish a divine union. The priests involved were usually meant to represent divinities, oftentimes kings would marry goddesses to legitimize their reign. There were numerous motivations for these rituals in the ancient world, but they primarily served to provide political legitimacy or to ensure agriculture fertility or prosperity.
In Mesopotamia for example, the Sumerian-Babylonian sacred marriage was performed by a king and high priestess (often of royal lineage) conducted in ritual temples (like Uruk’s Eanna, Nippur, Lagash, Babylon). The king represented Dumuzi/Tammuz, while the priestess embodied Inanna/Ishtar. This ritual was done explicitly for political influence and agricultural fertility. We can see evidence of this in cuneiform hymns like the Love Song for Shu-Sin (Istanbul 2461 tablet c. 2000 BCE), temple artifacts (vases, seals) dating as early as 4th millennium BCE linking myth to ritual practice, as well as royal inscriptions, like Gudea of Lagash commemorating bridal gifts to deities.
In Greece Hieros Gamos was performed by multiple different cults. In Athens the Basilinna (the wife of the archon basileus- a ceremonial position in the religion of ancient Athens) participated in a sacred rite during the Anthesteria festival: the ritual “marriage” to Dionysus. The Gerarai were fourteen priestesses responsible for these rites and played supportive roles and maintained ritual secrecy. At Heraion festivals (Samos, Argos, Olympia), rituals celebrated and re-enacted the marriage of Zeus and Hera. Here, civic priestesses/priests symbolically embodied deities.
In Ancient Egypt, temples featured “divine birth houses” (mammisi) with mythic divine unions depicted in reliefs. Pharaoh symbolically married deities like Hathor, Isis, or Mut during festivals (Opet at Luxor Temple) to reaffirm divine kingship. Mammisi were chapels celebrating the “birth” of divine kings through god–goddess unions like Amun–Mut or Hathor–Horus. The rituals confirmed Pharaoh's divinity and rightful rule, while nourishing the nation’s maat (order).
And in Ancient India the Shiva–Shakti union was a symbolic divine marriage central to Tantric practice, representing cosmic balance and creative power. In the Devadāsi tradition, temple-dedicated girls married a deity (deva or devī), and performed rituals and dances as “spiritual brides”. The Devadāsi were seen as divine consorts, their worshiped role linked to fertility and maintaining sacred order. Symbolic rites including yogic visualizations, mantras, and sometimes sexual rites (Maithuna), were performed in temples. Devadāsi ceremonies included initiation, vows, dance offerings, and lifelong devotion to their deity. They served daily: lighting lamps, dancing, partaking in processions, teaching arts, and accessing inner sanctums. They were also legally barred from human marriage (nitya sumangali), but could take secular patrons for support- sexual or platonic- with autonomy.
Seals, reliefs, and cult objects in temples allude to sacred unions- originating as early as Neolithic carvings in Anatolia interpreted as fertility rites. Similar rites are seen in Canaanite Anat–Baal and later in Israelite texts (Song of Solomon interpreted as hierogamic). It’s also worth noting that practices similar to these were practiced all over Africa (I am just highly ill qualified to talk about these).
Now I know what you’re thinking, none of these examples explicitly show humans and Gods engaging romantically with each other for the sake of pure love or presence. There are numerous myths and epics about Gods courting mortals. But historically speaking, there are very very few (nearly nonexistent) first person accounts of divine entities and humans engaging with each other as explicitly romantic or affectionate partners for the sake of love.
You could go as far as to say that the modern understanding of “God-Spousal” as we understand it is simply not in the same cultural zeitgeist as “sacred marriage” or Hieros Gamos as the ancient peoples practiced and recorded it traditionally. (Also please keep in mind that I can only speak on sources recorded or translated into English, I am quite sure more examples of this can be found in other languages like Sanskrit for example).
But this also makes sense (to me at least). Oftentimes these intimate relationships were kept personal and not clearly recorded or simply have not survived the test of time. Aside from the taboo nature of theophilias, these relationships often hid well under the guise of traditional deity worship. And it’s incredibly important to remember that a lack of surviving text does not at all imply a lack of practice, especially with erotic pagan (demonized) practices and mystery cults.
The one historical example I find worth noting was literally written by the world’s earliest known author. She pioneered the first person point of view in literature in certain religious hymns.
Enheduanna was a high priestess of the moon god Nanna (Sin) in the city of Ur (c. 2285–2250 BCE, Sumer), and daughter of Sargon of Akkad. Considered the world’s earliest known author, she wrote in her own voice across a series of deeply personal hymns.
Her hymns to Nanna/Sin (Nanna's Prayer to Enheduanna) are very intimate. She addresses him as a spouse/consort, speaks of receiving divine favor, living in his presence, and experiencing his voice. Her religious devotion is synonymous with her personal attachment. The inscription on the back of the disc states: "Wife of Nanna (the moon god of the city of Ur) and daughter of Sargon.
In the “Exaltation of Inanna” Endheduanna frames herself as the goddess’s chosen vessel, beloved and maintained in her role. Various temple hymns depict emotional closeness- praise, grief, and reassurance, as if from a spouse to a partner. These poems resemble erotic love hymns from one woman to another.
Enheduanna writes:
“O My Queen, Beloved of An… I have set fire to the coals… prepared Your nuptial chamber. Now may Your heart embrace me!”
She speaks of herself as Inanna’s bride, longing for acceptance and intimacy- opening a nuptial chamber in metaphorical devotion The act of preparing a sacred space for a divine lover to enter is highly reminiscent of god-spouse dynamics.
(And yes I am geeked as fuck that the first evidence of a divine-human romantic relationship is between Inanna and her girlfriend thank you)
But aside from that one example, there are no historical records of the divine having intimate relationships with devoted humans.
Just kidding!
Ironically enough, the most prevalent examples of theophilic relationships between mortals and a God can only really be found within Medieval Christian Mysticism, notably among women who wrote in the first person about being spouses of Christ. These are not proxies but deeply personal spiritual unions expressed through vows, visions, and writings. This also makes sense to me considering that Jesus Christ was one of the few deities that has historically been considered acceptable to love. Because of this, many nuns’ erotic and passionate writings to Christ have survived through the threat of colonization and censorship despite being highly controversial.
Accounts from people like Teresa of Avila describing their experience of religious ecstasy read identically to musings written by our modern day god-spouses.
From Teresa:
"I saw in his hand a long spear of gold, and at the iron's point there seemed to be a little fire. He appeared to me to be thrusting it at times into my heart, and to pierce my very entrails; when he drew it out, he seemed to draw them out also, and to leave me all on fire with a great love of God. The pain was so great, that it made me moan; and yet so surpassing was the sweetness of this excessive pain, that I could not wish to be rid of it. The soul is satisfied now with nothing less than God. The pain is not bodily, but spiritual; though the body has its share in it. It is a caressing of love so sweet which now takes place between the soul and God, that I pray God of His goodness to make him experience it who may think that I am lying."
- The Life of Teresa of Jesus
For obvious reasons, explicitly sexual descriptions involving God were very taboo, however the erotic tone of this passage still translates. Theresa shares the common anxiety of most god-spouses in not being believed in her experience.
The same can be said for St. John of the Cross whose writings are similar in their tenderness and romantic tone:
"In the inner wine cellar I drank of my beloved, and when I went abroad
Through all this valley I no longer knew anything, And lost the herd that I was following.
There he gave me his breast; There he taught me a sweet and living knowledge;
And I gave myself to him, Keeping nothing back; There I promised to be his bride.
Now I occupy my soul And all my energy in his service; I no longer tend the herd, Nor have I any other work, Now that my every act is love
With flowers and emeralds Chosen on cool mornings We shall weave garlands Flowering in your love,
And bound with one hair of mine.You considered That one hair fluttering at my neck; You gazed at it upon my neck; And it captivated you; And one of my eyes wounded you. When you looked at me
Your eyes imprinted your grace in me; For this you loved me ardently; And thus my eyes deserved To adore what they beheld in you.
Do not despise me; For if, before, you found me dark, Now truly you can look at me Since you have looked And left in me grace and beauty."
-The Spiritual Canticle
The concept of living itself becoming an act of worship is very reminiscent of god-spouse dynamics where life experience in itself is an offering to the Gods. It also explores how within god-spousal, even mundane tasks can feel devotional.
"O guiding night! O night more lovely than the dawn!
O night that has united the Lover with his beloved, transforming the Beloved into his Lover.
Upon my flowering breast, which I kept wholly for him alone, there he lay sleeping, and I caressing him there in a breeze from the fanning cedars.
When the breeze blew from the turret, as I parted his hair, it wounded my neck with its gentle hand, suspending all my senses. I abandoned and forgot myself, laying my face on my Beloved; all things ceased; I went out from myself, leaving my cares forgotten among the lilies.”
-The Dark Night of the Soul
This reads nearly identical to writings provided by god-spouses reporting astral experiences with a divine lover. Not always grand revelation, but gentle presence.
And especially from Hadewijch of Antwerp:
"On a certain Pentecost Sunday, I had a vision at dawn… My heart and my veins and all my limbs trembled and quivered with eager desire, and, as often occurred with me, such madness and fear beset my mind that it seemed to me that if I did not content my Beloved, and my Beloved did not fulfill my desire, dying I must go mad, and going mad I must die… And I was in such a state as I had been many times before, so passionate and so terribly unnerved that I thought I should not satisfy my Lover and my Lover not fully gratify me; then I would have to desire while dying and die while desiring. At that time I was so terribly unnerved with passionate love and in such pain that I imagined all my limbs breaking one by one and all my veins were separately in torturous pain."
This one actually speaks to me very deeply as a person with an intimate divine relationship. Specifically the line regarding an intense and insatiable yearning to serve and please your God, so strong that it almost feels like physical pain. For many god-spouses the relationship is not only romantic but existential, archetypal- as if being unified is simply right. This passage also touches on a very common anxiety of god-spouses: the double edged feeling of holding a deep desire for a deity and wanting to express that desire through carnality and love, but feeling unable to for multiple reasons, be it shame, access, or fear. This is so much more than a desire to be a good Christian, this is the yearning of a good wife and an extremely devoted devotee with a deeply intimate relationship with their God.
Also from Hadewijch:
“When the loved one receives from her Beloved The kisses that truly pertain to love. When he takes possession of the loved soul in every way, Love drinks in these kisses and tastes them to the end. As soon as Love thus touches the soul, She eats its flesh and drinks its blood. Love that thus dissolves the loved soul Sweetly leads them both To the indivisible kiss- That same kiss which fully unites The Three Persons in one sole Being. Thus the noble dew appeases the conflagration That had been raging in the land of Love"
-Hadewijch: The Complete Works
Again, this also hits hard as a devoted lover, especially the idea of God taking possession, literally and symbolically, of the loved soul in every way. This is again not simply a typical display of worship but complete and total surrender initiated by love.
And from Mechthild of Magdeburg:
"Lord, you are my lover, My longing, My flowing stream, My sun, And I am your reflection."
"God said to the soul: 'I kiss you. I embrace you. I press you to my divine heart. You are entwined in me and I in you. We two shall never again be separated"
"Lord, I lie at your side, naked and free. My heart beats with yours, My soul melts in your fire. Take me, my Beloved, and make me wholly yours"
Again, clearly romantic and sensual in tone. The detail about laying naked beside each other is certainly more than mere worship. “Lord, you are my lover”, is as plain as it gets.
Also from Mechthild:
"Then the bride of all delights goes to the Fairest of lovers in the secret chamber of the invisible Godhead. There she finds the bed and the abode of love prepared by God in a manner beyond what is human.
“Stay, Lady Soul.”
“What do you bid me, Lord?”
“Take off your clothes.”
“Lord, what will happen to me then?”
“Lady Soul, you are so utterly formed to my nature That not the slightest thing can be between you and me. Never was an angel so glorious That to him was granted for one hour What is given to you for eternity. And so you must cast off from you Both fear and shame and all external virtues. Rather, those alone that you carry within yourself Shall you foster forever. These are your noble longing And your boundless desire. These I shall fulfill forever With my limitless lavishness.”
- God, Desire, and a Theology of Human Sexuality
Again, this is obviously highly erotic, the demand to remove clothes, the promise of being utterly entwined with nothing between them, fulfillment of boundless desire, is intentionally intimate.
It’s incredibly important to remember that these accounts were written by nuns who usually did not have romantic or sexual partners aside from Christ. As Hadewijch put it: “God alone is enough”. It is very evident in these writings that the roles of divine father, lover, guide, and erotic caretaker, are all being fulfilled by the same divine presence.
These examples though, however spicy, were recorded by Christian and Catholic nuns who very much subscribed to theological standards of purity culture and celibacy. Therefore, many of these writings were justified as symbolic metaphors. The women writing these highly intimate accounts would likely never have outwardly admitted the erotic nature, and although they quite literally are god-spouses, they likely would not appreciate the comparison to modern pagans and demonolaters.
Speaking of pagans and demonolaters, specifically in western demonolatry, the practice of god-spousal and erotic magic is very common. Do not at all mistake a lack of historical text for a lack of legitimate practice.
There are many creators you can currently find in online spaces that explore their personal relationships to the divine in great detail. (r/demonolatrypractices has tons). I don’t consider these to be valid “historical” or traditional examples of theophilic relationships simply because it was majorly popularized this century. This doesn’t mean demonolaters haven’t always been courted by their de(a)mons, more so that we have very few examples of this throughout ancient history. Which also makes sense, in medieval times contacting a demon, let alone courting one, could land you a death sentence. Most of the information we have on demons and fringe spirits in general were collected from highly regulated mystery cults and personal family grimoires. But even if this was a totally new phenomenon, that wouldn’t make it any less real or valid.
First, we have to establish how demonolatry was recorded by the people who observed it as opposed to the people that practiced it.
For example, Ludovico Maria Sinistrari’s (17th c.), ‘De Daemonialitate et Incubis et Succubis’ is one of the earliest detailed essays on human–demon sexual relations, written by an Inquisition theologian. It offers a detailed treatise on sexual relations with demons, distinguishing them from both bestiality and fantasy. It explores demonic semen, intercourse mechanics, and spiritual offspring, treating these encounters as real supernatural unions. Sinistrari cites both ecclesiastical and court records to assert that witches not only fantasized about, but “vere carnaliter corpore conjunguntur Dæmoni”- “truly copulated in the flesh with demons.”
It was said that witches or wizards formed formal pacts after an elaborate ceremony with 11 ritual steps, including explicit renunciation and oath-taking. The demon then delivers honors, riches, and “carnal pleasures”. With non-magicians, incubi and succubi engaged in erotic encounters without the ceremonial pact.
Sinistrari frames these acts as spiritual rebellion and sin, not romance, and this is a common theme. Their writings are colored by fear, condemnation, and religious doctrine. However, the descriptions acknowledge that demons actively sought physical intimacy, offering pleasure, wealth, or knowledge as incentives. Witch trial records (Romania, 1489, Germany 1587) include confessions of repeated, pleasurable intercourse with demons, sometimes described as marriage-like or orgasmic, where witches claimed their demon-lovers called them “wife” and had good physical form.
Likewise, Nicolas Rémy’s ‘Daemonolatreiae libri tres’ (1595) is a witch-hunter’s manual that complies with testimony from across Europe, citing archived trial accounts of people forming pacts and sexual unions with demons as holy contracts rather than mere allegory. The manual describes demons appearing in alluring forms to initiate sexual relations, sometimes as part of structured diabolical unions or pacts. These were understood as literally binding relationships, not solely allegorical or imagined.
Medieval folklore includes tales of people who married or bore children by incubi/succubi. Some Talmudic and Christian texts speak of cambion offspring from unholy unions. For example, the demon Asmodeus allegedly fell in love with Sarah (Book of Tobit), or tales of a German woman who sustained years-long illicit relations with a demon lover.
All of these accounts legitimize the practice, or at least confirm the idea that human practitioners, witches, pagans, and heathens themselves likely had deeply affectionate relationships with their demons- inspiring their loyalty-, or were overtly engaged in sexual acts with them. This is likely a blend of the truth mixed with religious propaganda that viewed anything remotely foreign as inherently perverted.
The question of if demons and spirits could even love humans has been the topic of theological debate for centuries. Ancient demonologists (Augustine, Sinistrari) assert that demons experience passion and desire, sometimes to the detriment of humans- draining vitality, causing illness or death. Rémy and the trial records suggest that demons could have affectionate or possessive bonds, calling women “wife” or forming lasting liaisons. Historic writings like Sinistrari’s and Rémy’s depict demon-human unions as real, erotic, and pact-based- driven by desire, power, and sometimes affection.
Modern demonolaters integrate spiritual marriage, ritual sex, and emotional bond-building in their practice for power, growth, and companionship. Whether demons can “love” humans depends on how love is defined. These unions at the very least reflect affection and interest, though within a spiritual and often asymmetrical relationship.
In traditional demonology, demons were said to feel lust, desire, jealousy, and sometimes possessive affection, but not "love" as humans know it. In modern demonolatry many practitioners report that demons express genuine love, protection, playfulness, grief, even heartbreak. This love is not always human in form, sometimes it is energy, attention, transformation, or devotion returned.
These ideas are maintained within the writings of real world practicing demonolaters and pagans who are not influenced by religious dogma.
S. Connolly’s Daemonic Pacts, The Complete Book of Demonolatry, describes formal binding rituals- including oaths and intimacies with demons as real spiritual marriages. Some practitioners report energetic sex and affection within devotional partnership. The Complete Book of Demonolatry includes sex magick rituals with demons for purposes including empowerment, transformation, or deep connection. The text features formalizing initiation rites involving blood, oaths, and vows to establish personal, spiritual partnerships akin to marriage or mentorship. This is usually done out of pursuit of magical power, knowledge, or psychospiritual growth through intimate engagement with a demon’s energy.
And of course, many share online, producing essays and long term documentation of affectionate, romantic bonds with demons including full-time spiritual marriage lasting years. Modern practitioners report demons offering genuine guidance, protection, and emotional bond, similar to love, though defined within a spiritual, non-human framework.
Tantric magick is highly popular within demonolatry. It intersects ancient esoteric principles with daemonic invocation, erotic trance, and energy work in complex and powerful ways. While demonolatry does not claim direct descent from traditional Indian Tantra, modern practitioners have adapted and incorporated tantric principles, especially in the context of spirit work, god-spousal, and sex magick with demons.
In this context, "Tantra" refers to ritualized, energetic sex used to alter consciousness, raise power, and merge with a spiritual force or being. It operates within the belief that sexual energy is sacred, and can be harnessed to enter trance, connect with daemons, or reach divine union. It emphasizes the union of opposites- masculine/feminine, light/dark, human/divine as a metaphysical act. This is done for a variety of reasons but is usually done for the purpose of becoming unified with a daemon, harnessing energy through pleasure and sacrifice, and transcending ego to access higher (or deeper) states of being.
How It’s Practiced in Demonolatry:
Solo Sex Magick / Masturbation Rites
Described in S. Connolly’s works (Sex Magick and The Daemonolater’s Guide to Daemonic Magick), solo rituals may involve:
Invocation or evocation of a daemon (like Asmodeus, Belphegor, Sitri, or Lilith)
Use of the daemon’s sigil, incense, and colored candles
Directed orgasm as an offering, binding act, or energetic gateway
Often paired with visualization, trance, and blood offerings
The objective is to merge with the daemon’s current, receive insight, or seal a pact through orgasmic release.
Partnered Ritual Sex
In some traditions, two or more people take on the roles of divine/daemonic opposites or act as channels for daemons, quite similar to historical examples of sacred sex. The sex act becomes a ritual drama meant to invoke a third divine force.
This may include:
Chanted enns
Symbolic penetration or fluid exchange
Post-sex offerings or ecstatic devotion
Possession of one or all members engaging in the act.
And similarly, the goal is manifesting desire, achieving gnosis, or empowering magical work.
Spirit Sex / Astral Union
This is especially common among daemon-spouses or those engaging in devotional relationships with spirits. Practices include astral visualization of the daemon during masturbation or ritual sex, possession-style trance where the daemon takes over or “rides” the body, energetic merging or sexual feeding between human and spirit, and like the other forms, is often enhanced by blood offerings, prayer, or intoxicants. Practitioners report extreme pleasure, transformation, or even fear. Physical effects can include feeling physically altered or energetically charged/drained afterward. In many long term marriages and initiations the The daemon may request this regularly as part of a pact or bond.
For those called to it, tantric sex magick with demons is a way to channel divine energy, shatter illusions, and forge intimate, transformative relationships with beings who are erotic, complex, and deeply present. But it’s infinitely important to keep in mind that consent and mutuality must exist even with daemons. Sex with a daemon should be initiated by invitation and trust, not coercion. Not all daemons desire or accept sex as a form of offering, discernment is crucial. Sex magick can blur boundaries and lead to obsession, depletion, or spiritual imbalance if not properly grounded.
Recommended Demons for Tantric Magic/Sexual Work
Asmodeus: Lust, domination, sacred sex, deep possession
Lilith: Shadow work, liberation, erotic sovereignty
Belphegor: Hedonism, relaxed eroticism, power through pleasure
Sitri: Glamour, seduction, astral lust
Naamah: Dark femininity, submission, erotic transformation
Lucifer: Pride, erotic transcendence, illumination through desire
There is often a distinction made between true god- or demon-spousal as a deeply committed, often lifelong spiritual marriage with a being, and other forms of devotional, magical, or sexual interaction (such as one-off spirit work, channeling, or dream sex).
According to demonolaters like S. Connolly, god- or demon-spousal is a formal, binding, and mutual pact with a demon (or god), recognized ritually and energetically as a kind of spiritual marriage. This often includes oaths, sigils, offerings, and blood rites, though it may also emerge over time through intense emotional and magical work. This is a lifelong (or at least long-term) relationship that is not casual or temporary. It comes with spiritual responsibilities, sometimes even exclusive loyalty. It usually includes emotional intimacy, sexual or energetic union, and deep trust and devotion on both sides. Formal marriages and ceremonies are held to solidify the pact.
In her works Connolly emphasizes that god/demon-spousalry is: “A spiritual path of service, transformation, and union… not something you ‘try out.’”
The following may involve demons, sex, or ritual, but are not considered god-spousal:
Dream sex with a demon can be part of the experience, but without intention, oath, and ongoing devotion, it’s not spousal. Some demonolaters distinguish between a "demon lover" (a frequent sexual or magical partner) and a "demon spouse" (a bonded, oath-bound divine partner with whom one shares a life path).
One-time pact or spellwork, unless sealed with mutual bond and enduring relationship, it’s a working, not a marriage, and that’s totally fine.
Erotic possession, while intense, is not god-spousal unless grounded in long-term relationship and consent.
Projection or fantasy- while there is absolutely nothing wrong with fantasy, without discernment, practitioners might mistake imagination for partnership. (I plan on making a whole post about this, stay tuned)
HOW DOES ONE DO IT PROPERLY?
There is no one way to do god/demon spousal properly. But these are some general guidelines to keep in mind.
Discernment
Establish that the entity is genuinely willing to enter a spousal dynamic. Ensure that you are ready for the level of commitment of a god-spousal dynamic (do you have the time? Are you emotionally available? Are you willing to rearrange your schedule for them if need be? Why do you want to be a God-Spouse?).
This often comes after months or years of devotional work, dreams, visitations, testing, or invitations with an extremely clear recognition of current and energy (you shouldn’t be unsure if it’s really them. If you’re still not sure if it’s them, you’re not ready to marry them.).
You’ve worked with the daemon or deity long-term (months or years).
You can reliably identify their energy, voice, presence, and personality.
They have shown up consistently (via dreams, trance, channeling, or synchronicities).
You’ve had difficult conversations with them, not just pleasurable ones.
You’ve challenged your own biases and been humbled or tested.
Mutual Consent
A demon or god must actively agree- either through direct communication, divination, or signs. Practitioners report that some spirits refuse, while others initiate. You must actively agree and have a clear understanding of what the relationship entails. This is not something you blindly stumble into, you should be very aware of your marriage, asking questions and giving answers with absolute clarity.
Signs of mutual consent include:
A clear yes in divination (cards, pendulum, scrying, trance)
Recurring dreams or visions where they propose or refer to marriage
Rituals or pacts feeling anchored, permanent, or acknowledged by them
Clear boundaries and rules emerging from the relationship
This is not a vibe. It’s a contract. You should be able to name your roles, responsibilities, and what the bond is and isn’t. Consent works both ways.
Ritual Oath or Pact
This often includes:
Invocation or evocation
A vow of fidelity, devotion, or service from all members participating (human and daemon)
An offering (material, sexual, or spiritual)
The giving or receiving of a sigil, ring, or mark
Sometimes a spirit wedding ritual (alone, within a coven, or with a human officiant)
Some demonolaters mark this pact with an astral wedding night, the placement of a collar, ring, or binding charm, or an alteration of energetic or emotional state (permanent link, daily presence).
Integration into Daily Practice
Spouses typically keep altars, offer regular gifts, and experience ongoing interaction- sometimes channeling the demon in writing, art, or ritual. The relationship may evolve over time into mentorship, dominance, protection, or even familial roles.
As Connolly writes: “Daemons don’t love the way humans do. But they honor loyalty, truth, and offering of the self… if you return it.”
Why is God-Spousal so transgressive?
Gods court mortals CONSTANTLY throughout myths. Why is anyone surprised or offended that real pagans would also be courted by their Gods?
The thing about god-spousal is that it isn’t about worshipping a myth or concept, it’s about inhabiting it, mutating it, and carrying it forward as a living, erotic, and relational experience. In traditional religious models, a myth is something to be read, revered, re-enacted from a distance. You’re not supposed to become the lover of Dionysus or Inanna. You might play the role in ritual, or visualize it in meditation, but the boundary between story and self remains intact.
God-spouses, by contrast, do not just believe in a deity, they enter into direct relationship with them. They do not keep the myth static, they become co-authors of its ongoing expression in their waking and dreaming lives. They experience the god not just as a symbol, but as active, present, and emotionally engaged. This shifts the myth from narrative to experiential reality, which is inherently threatening to religious orthodoxy, academia, and even parts of modern paganism that want to keep the myth safely in the past or the abstract.
God-spousalry often includes emotional intimacy, erotic energy exchange, oath-bound fidelity, mystical or even physical experiences of union. These are not performances, they are lived. The spouse doesn't just say, "I love Dionysus" or "Lucifer guides me." They say, "He comes into my bed. He claims me. He changed my body."
That’s no longer theology. That’s mythopoesis, the creation of new myth from the body outward. Most spiritual systems want to control the myth to canonize it, to keep it in the past , and prevent deviance from the common understanding of what Gods and Demons should represent. But god- spousal re-personalizes the divine, making the god partial, biased, intimate, even possessive in ways that upend collective orthodoxy.
God-spousal is private and relational and keeps myth alive and vulnerable. God-spouses often report dreams where the god subverts expectations, changes in divine personality or behaviour. New names, sigils, or roles emerge from the relationship. This suggests that deities themselves evolve through intimacy, not just as archetypes or projections, but as entities shaped by love, blood, rebellion, and fidelity.
The spouse, then, becomes a mythological agent and a liminal figure between mortal and divine, claiming themselves as a living gospel of the god’s present form. And in doing so, they disrupt the notion that myth is fixed. They insist that myth is a relationship: alive, sexual, in flux, and most importantly, real.
The god-spouse says:
“I belong to the god. And he comes to me in ways no one else sees.”
To some, this is blasphemy. To others, it is the only real form of devotion.
Enheduanna’s hymns don’t just praise Inanna, they record struggle, exile, longing, restoration. She isn’t describing mythology, she’s inside it.
“May your heart return to its place… I am yours!”
Christian mystics like Catherine of Siena describe mystical marriage with Christ in sensual, intimate terms, not symbolic ones.
“He placed a ring on my finger... we are one in flesh and soul.”
Modern demonolaters describe pacts, possession, astral sex, emotional guidance, and real-time divine evolution, demons who weep, change, protect, or burn their human lovers.
God-spousalry is myth that bleeds.
It turns worship into intimacy, archetype into partnership, and tradition into transformation. It’s so controversial because it dares to say the gods are still moving, they still fall in love, and you can become part of their becoming.
I personally have flirted with the label of god-spouse more recently but have never fully took it on myself fully even though I share a great deal in common with them. We’re not technically married, although our bond is as strong as one.
I hope that those who do identify as god spouses might have learned a bit about the practice and themselves from this post.
Thank you for reading if you made it this far. Sources down below. :)
Happy Venus Day!!! 💕✴️
Literary Sources:
“Sacred Marriages: The Divine-Human Sexual Metaphor from Sumer to Early Christianity”- Martti Nissinen & Risto Uro
“Chapter 6: Hieros Gamos in Ancient Greek Religion" by Aphrodite A. Avagianou
“The Wiccan “Great Rite” — Hieros Gamos in the Modern West” (Samuel Wagar, Journal of Religion & Popular Culture, 2009)
“The Stages of Hera: Deconstructing the Sacred Marriage” (2022) -George Topalidis
“A Brief Study into Sacred Prostitution in Antiquity”- Kelley Rickard
“The “Sanctity” of Marriage – Mythological Origins…”- Yolanda Dreyer
“Mystical Marriage: Symbol and Meaning in Divine‑Human Encounter”- Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee
“Revelations of Divine Love”- Julian of Norwich
“A History of the Goddess: From the Ice Age to the Bible” - Edward Dodge.
“Demoniality: Sex Between Humans and Demons”- Ludovico Maria Sinistrari, Candice Black
“The Complete Book of Demonolatry”- S. Connolly
“Daemonic Pacts”- S.Connolly
“Sex Magick”- S. Connolly
“Liber Azazel”- Frater Tenebrius
“Liber Lilith”- Donald Tyson
“Infernal Compendium”- Anathema Publishing
Sources (Links): Please check the community post
https://www.tumblr.com/communities/cult-kink-coven/post/788832870038896640/god-spousal-an-overview
Feels like a good time to repost this