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Summary; Apparently, he's one of the hottest hockey players in the country, and you had just agreed to be his fake girlfriend. Satoru Gojo is hard not to notice. With his coy smirk and rock-hard abs, he's the cockiest of all the jocks.
Tags; satoru gojo x reader, hockey player au, figure skater x hockey player, college au, roommates au.
Warnings; 18+, fluff, angst, smut, college au, partying, drinking/alcohol, weed usage, romance, jealousy, pining, slow burn, enemies to lovers, cheating.
Notes; Taglist is open!! also this chapter is so short compared to my other fics since i rewrote this like 7 times and this was the one I liked the most..
3.5k words
masterlist! ⤏ next chapter
The sound of ice being scraped by the skates of the hockey players filled your ears, making you cringe at the unpleasant noise.
Crossing your arms, you watched as they skillfully passed the puck to each other, determined not to let the opposing team take control.
You hated hockey, and it wasn't just because of the sport itself. It was the type of men who played it - cocky, entitled, and overly aggressive. Every time you came to the rink after their practice, you would find the ice in terrible condition, thanks to the rough way they played.
The University of Tokyo was notorious for its hockey team, and not in a good way. The players were known for their douchey attitudes and their reputation as "fuck boys." As you watched them play, you couldn't help but notice their ridiculously attractive appearances. It was almost as if the only requirement to join the team was to be a 6-foot-tall, handsome guy. Despite their looks, you couldn't stand them.
You sat next to your friend in the cold arena, her eyes glued to the fast-paced hockey game unfolding in front of you. She munched on her popcorn, a smile spread on her face as she yelled your friend's name, "Go Yuji!!" You couldn't help but laugh at her enthusiasm, even though you weren't a fan of hockey yourself. Suddenly, she exclaimed and started choking on her popcorn, causing you to quickly pat her back and make sure she was okay.
As you looked back at the game, your eyes narrowed at one of the hockey boys who had stopped full speed and scraped the ice so badly it made you cringe. This was one of the reasons why you hated coming to these games - the roughness of the players and the damage they caused to the ice rink. The poor ice rink didn't deserve such treatment. Wondering what the ice rink did to deserve this.
You couldn't help but feel a sense of annoyance as the game went on, the constant yelling and cheering from the crowd only adding to the chaos.
The fans roared with excitement as one of the Hockey boys received the puck, deftly dribbling past the defender with ease. As he stopped momentarily, a wide smile spread across his face before he swiftly went left, skillfully dodging the goalie and scoring a goal for his team.
The crowd erupted into cheers as the score changed from 1-2 to 1-3, with Nobara screaming and spilling her popcorn in excitement. She saw Yuji skate towards her, a grin on his face. "Next one's for you, Kugisaki!" he shouted, before skating back to his original position.
As the team huddled up before getting off the ice rink, you couldn't help but feel bored. Hockey was never your cup of tea, despite your father being a huge fan and dragging you to countless games as a child. But as you watched the boys high-five and congratulate each other, you couldn't help but feel a sense of camaraderie and team spirit in the air.
The energy in the stadium was infectious, and even though you weren't a fan of the sport, you couldn't deny the sense of excitement and unity that filled the air. As the second half began, you settled back into your seat.
Nobara looked at you with a small smirk on her lips as you both sat in the stands, watching the hockey game below. The arena was buzzing with excitement as the home team took on their rivals.
Nobara noticed your gaze and nudged you, "So Y/N, what about that one?" She pointed towards a tall blonde man, his hair disheveled and stuck to his forehead from the sweat buildup on his helmet. As he lifted his jersey to wipe his forehead, the "puck bunnies" in the stands went wild at the sight of his chiseled abs.
You shrugged and replied, "No thanks, not looking right now." You grabbed your bag and took out your phone, snapping some pictures of the action on the ice.
Nobara pouted and scooched closer to you, placing a hand on your shoulder and shaking it. "Don't be like that, Y/N. You have to get over Toji soon." She was referring to your recent breakup with your long-term boyfriend, who happened to be a hockey player on this very team.
You sighed and leaned your head against Nobara's shoulder, taking in the energy of the game and the cheers from the crowd. Despite your best efforts, you couldn't help but feel a pang of longing for the excitement and passion that came with being in a relationship with someone like Toji.
You couldn't help but feel a pang of nostalgia as you watched Toji, the man who you used to love before he cheated on you with some random sorority chick, interact with his teammates. You remembered how much you used to admire his skills on the ice and how he always seemed to effortlessly lead his team to victory. But as you watched him now, you couldn't help but feel a sense of bitterness towards him. You were still hurt by the way he had treated you, but at the same time, you couldn't deny the fact that he had genuinely treated you well at some point.
As you continued to watch him, you couldn't help but wonder how things would have turned out if he hadn't cheated on you. Maybe you would still be together, cheering him on from the stands. But now, you were just another face in the crowd, trying to hide your emotions as you watched your ex move on with his life.
Kugisaki, your best friend, noticed your gaze and followed it to Toji. She let out a sigh, knowing all too well about your past with him. But she didn't say anything, just letting you take a moment to yourself.
Toji Zenin, a living legend in Utokyo. He was the captain of the hockey team before being demoted due to the fact that he was the reason why the ice rink was broken during your freshman year. He may have been just a year older than you, but he seemed so mature and confident on the ice. That was one of the reasons why you had fallen for him in the first place. But now, as you watched him interact with his teammates, you couldn't help but see him in a different light. He was just another guy, no longer the perfect image you had created in your mind. And although it hurt, you knew it was time to move on and let go of the past.
You remember the day you met him like it was yesterday, sneaking into the ice rink to practice late at night. You were startled when he caught you, but instead of getting angry or telling on you, he just teased you and then let you go. He was the man who showed you what love was, and you were grateful for his presence in your life.
He was the reason you continued your skating career, the one who motivated you to finish tryouts even when you wanted to give up. And now, as you looked at your calendar and saw the upcoming final, you couldn't help but feel overwhelmed. Just 20 more minutes until the game was over, and you could finally go home and take your mind off of everything. But for now, you couldn't tear your eyes away from the man who had once meant everything to you, and still held a special place in your heart.
You were supposed to be studying for your midterm in sports medicine, but here you are, stuck at a hockey game. The players were fiercely competing, their skates gliding across the ice as they chased after the puck. The sound of sticks hitting the ice echoed through the arena, and the cheers of the crowd filled the air. Suddenly, the referee blew his whistle and signaled a roughing penalty, causing the crowd to boo in disagreement. You couldn't help but feel annoyed at the interruption, wishing you were back at home studying instead.
But you knew you couldn't just get up and leave without your friend Nobara dragging you back in. Sighing, you resigned yourself to staying for the rest of the game, trying your best to enjoy it despite the looming thought of your midterm.
One of the players had gotten up from the ice and was now furiously cussing out the referee. His white hair stuck out in all directions, his angry words audible through the mic attached to his helmet. You knew instantly who it was - Satoru Gojo, the star of the hockey team and the most popular guy on campus. Girls flocked to him like "puck bunnies," as they called it in hockey slang. But to you, he was just the man you absolutely despised.
Growing up, you had always been in the same social circles because your parents were close friends. Your father and Satoru's both shared a love for hockey, so you were constantly in the same presence as him. And it seemed like he was good at everything he did - sports, academics, socializing. It was infuriating. As you watched him being escorted to the penalty box, a scowl immediately replaced the look on your face. Satoru Gojo was the last person you wanted to see.
The enemy hockey team slammed into the glass, right where you were sitting, causing it to shake. The sound of their bodies colliding with the glass was loud and jarring. Nobara, who was sitting next to you, looked both amused and thrilled by the intense action happening on the ice. One of the players fell to the ground, but he quickly got back up and flashed a smile at Nobara before returning to the game.
You couldn't help but notice her blushing and giggled at her reaction. "I'm definitely coming to their next game if this is my view," she said, fixing her hair and staring back at the player.
The game continued, the energy in the arena was palpable. The coaches and fans were yelling and cheering, urging the Utokyo team on as they made their way back to the goal. You could feel the intensity building as the clock ticked down to the final seconds. And then, with a swift and powerful shot, the Utokyo team scored another goal, solidifying their victory with a final score of 4-1.
The iconic music of the game began to play, the Utokyo hockey team skated onto the ice, their sharp blades slicing through the smooth surface with ease. Each player had a look of fierce determination on their face, and you could feel the excitement building in the air. As they reached the center of the rink, they gracefully removed their helmets, revealing their sweaty, yet glowing faces.
The girls in the audience erupted into screams and cheers, their excitement and admiration for the team palpable. You couldn't help but feel a surge of adrenaline as you watched the team prepare for the game ahead. Their strong and confident presence was enough to make you believe that they were the best hockey team in the world.
Grabbing your things, you followed Nobara to the front of the gymnasium where everyone was eagerly waiting for the hockey teams to come out. Tapping your foot impatiently, you scanned the crowded room, trying to find your ex among the sea of faces. "When is Yuji coming?" you asked, crossing your arms in frustration.
Nobara rolled her eyes before interlocking arms with you. "He's coming soon, now help me look for that hot hockey player we saw earlier," she said, a mischievous glint in her eyes. Just then, the Kyoto boys walked in, some of them looking dejected and others trying to hide their disappointment after being defeated.
But your attention was immediately drawn to the tall, handsome guy who walked in, laughing at some joke his friend had said. He had a confident stride and a charming smile that caught everyone's attention. Your eyes widened as you realized it was the same guy Nobara had been drooling over earlier. And it seemed like she wasn't the only one, as you saw several girls in the crowd blushing and giggling.
As he made his way towards the group of girls, your heart raced in anticipation. You could see Nobara practically melting as he locked eyes with her and walked up to her. They both looked nervous, fidgeting with whatever they could find in their hands. But before you could even process what was happening, he left with her number and an invitation to one of the parties she was throwing later that weekend.
You were tired and hungry, and all you wanted to do was go home and rest. But you knew how much Yuji loved playing hockey and how important it was to him, so you waited patiently.
Finally, after what felt like hours, Yuji emerged from the locker room with a huge grin on his face. His hair was a mess and he was drenched in sweat, but he looked incredibly happy. He immediately ran over to you and gave you a tight hug, causing you to wrinkle your nose at his sweaty smell.
"You reek of sweat," you said, playfully pushing him away before he could hug your friend Nobara.
"Nice to see you too, Y/N," Yuji replied with a chuckle, his light brown eyes sparkling with mischief. You couldn't help but smile at him. He was like a little brother to you, and you were proud of him for pursuing his passion for hockey.
Ruffling his hair, you couldn't help but praise him for his performance on the ice. "I saw your shot, good job," you said, a genuine smile on your face. Yuji beamed with pride, and you knew that your words meant a lot to him. Despite the fatigue and hunger you were feeling, seeing Yuji's happiness made it all worth it.
His eyes glistened with excitement and his cheeks flushed with a rosy tint as he listened to you compliment him. You couldn't help but giggle at his reaction, finding it endearing and cute. But before you could say anything else, your attention was caught by a certain someone sprinting towards you, looking like he was silently cursing to himself. It was your neighbor , and he seemed to be in a rush.
He came close to you and let out a sigh of relief as he reached you. "I'm stealing her real quick," he said, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
You raised an eyebrow in confusion, but before you could question him, he grabbed your body and pulled you close. Leaning his arm against your body, he whispered into your ear, his hot breath sending shivers down your spine. "Just go along with it, okay?" he said, propping back up with a smirk on his face.
You turned to look at the white-haired male, opening your mouth to say something before being interrupted by the sound of his mother's voice. She let out a loud squeal once she saw the two of you, quickly hitting her husband's arm before coming close to you with a warm smile on her face. "I always knew you two would end up together," she exclaimed, causing you to blush and your friend to avoid your gaze because he knew you would be furious with him for this stunt.
"Y/N, I'm so glad! I've always wanted another girl in my family, besides my baby girl now," she said with a bright smile as her husband propped up Satoru's baby sister. You couldn't help but smile at the adorable sight of the 4-year-old girl with her white hair tied into two small ponytails and her face covered in chocolate.
"I'm glad to be a part of the family," you replied, placing your hand on the back of Satoru before pinching his back, making him wince. "I'm going to invite your family to dinner tomorrow! We haven't had a get-together in years... We definitely have a reason to have one now." She covered her mouth before giggling, and you couldn't help but feel a slight sense of dread at the mention of your family coming over for dinner.
Excusing herself, his mom walked away with her husband and child, leaving you and Satoru alone. You could feel the anger radiating off of you as you stared at him, if looks could kill, Satoru would have been dead long ago.
"You told your parents we were together...?" you asked, your voice dripping with disbelief and rage. Satoru's face fell, knowing he had made a grave mistake. He tried to explain himself, but you cut him off with a smack to the head.
"You're kidding me, right?" you scoffed, crossing your arms and raising an eyebrow at him. He looked like a child being scolded by his parents, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of satisfaction at that.
"Uh, about that," Satoru started, a sheepish smile on his face as he scratched his head. Before he could say anything else, you stormed away, pushing open the gymnasium doors and striding towards the parking lot.
This is dangerous. So fucking dangerous, playing this game with you. You know that getting involved with someone like Satoru is a recipe for disaster. He's charming and confident, but you've seen the way he treats women. He'll use them for his own amusement and then discard them without a second thought.
“What if I pay you to date me?” He asks with a mischievous glint in his eye, watching as you stomp towards the parking lot, completely ignoring his request.
“No,” you say firmly, not even turning to look at him.
“But I got plenty,” he says, following close behind you.
“Don't care,” you reply, your tone laced with annoyance.
“All right, so it’s obvious you’re not interested in money,” he muses, as if you haven't spoken. “Has to be something else then.” He pauses for a moment, deep in thought. “Booze? Weed?” he suggests, trying to find something that might interest you.
“No, and no, and get lost,” you say, your voice dripping with sarcasm.
He continues to follow you as you walk towards your car, his footsteps matching yours on the sidewalk. “Okay then. I guess you’re not into party favors,” he teases, a hint of a smirk on his lips.
"How about a date?" he offers, leaning against the doorway of your car.
You roll your eyes, trying to ignore the smug look on his face. "Why would I want to go out with you, the most arrogant and obnoxious guy on campus?"
"Because I'm charming, handsome, and irresistible," he grins, winking at you.
You scoff, not buying his ridiculous act. "Yeah, keep dreaming, Mr. Hotshot Hockey Player."
He laughs, clearly enjoying your banter. "Come on, just one date. I promise to behave."
You shake your head, crossing your arms over your chest. "No way. I have better things to do with my time."
"Like what? Study?" he teases, raising an eyebrow.
"At least I have priorities," you retort, trying to hide the hint of a smile on your face.
"Fine, be that way. But just know, everyone wants to go out with me," he says cockily, flashing you a dazzling smile.
You can't help but laugh at his confidence. "Just out of curiosity, after you wake up in the morning, do you admire yourself in the mirror for one hour or more?”
"Two," he replies without hesitation, causing you to burst out laughing.
"Do you high five yourself and talk yourself up?" you ask, unable to resist teasing him further.
"Of course not," he smirks. "I kiss each of my biceps and then point to the mirror and thank my old man for creating such a perfect male specimen."
You shake your head, trying not to smile at his ridiculousness. "No thanks, I'll pass on that date.
"Three months." He mutters, his voice confident and determined.
"Three months and if I don't convince my parents or get Naomi back, I promise I won't ever bother you or contact you ever again." He sticks out his chest confidently, smirking at you as if he knows he's already won.
"Three months?" you ask incredulously, your voice laced with disbelief. "Seriously? Three months is too much," you say, pursing your lips before letting out a heavy sigh. Three months of pretending to be in a fake relationship with him just to make his ex jealous.
"You're my only option." He pleads, his eyes boring into yours.
"Incorrect." You scoff, crossing your arms over your chest. "There are plenty of other women out there who would be more than willing to help you make your ex jealous." You wanted to say no, to turn him down and drive away.
"You're right, but she hates you the most." He says, his voice barely above a whisper. You hated him so damn much, but you couldn't deny the fact that you were intrigued by him.
There was something about him that drew you in, that made you want to know more.
You couldn't believe it. You thought this kind of shit only happened in movies, in books, or in some ridiculous fan-fiction.
But no, this was reality and the touch of his hand squeezing yours made you realize just how utterly fucked you were. You tried to laugh it off, thinking he was just playing some sick joke the hockey guys told him to do. But when you saw the serious look on his face, you knew he wasn't joking. He didn't even have a glint of mischief in his eyes, just pure determination. Your heart raced and your palms started to sweat as he shook your hand, his strong grip making you feel like a limp noodle.
You could feel the pulse in your ears as he squeezed your hand. But as you stood there, feeling like a deer caught in headlights, all you could think was, "Fuck."
What’s the uploading schedule for this feeling in summer going to be like?
I have it all written out, but MY LAPTOP LIKE BROKE also tumblrs been weird i’ve been trying to post chapter two and some drabbles but my phone won’t let me???
Warning: Language, implied sexual content, abuse, violence: this book will explore topics of abuse further down the line please don’t read if you’re a minor. Also I originally wrote this as a Natsu x Lucy book for Fairytail but I kept it and now it’s an Eren fic. So if y’all saw it on wattpad SHOUT OUT TO U!
Rating: M
SYNOPSIS: -> Y/N L/N wasn't always the most well behaved girl. She got into trouble plenty of times and was constantly on her fathers mind. As a dirt bike racer she plans on going pro but when she makes a big mistake, her father leaves her one choice. Spend the summer with her grandparents with no social media or technology far away from her friends and boyfriend.
Eren Jaeger, a 21 year old pro dirt bike racer who visits Houston Texas for the summer when his grandparents get sick. But when the girl next door catches his attention he cant help but wonder her name.
Can Eren help Y/N pull her life together or will she return back to her old ways and blow it all?
Chapter One: I’m a mess (and I’m gonna blow it all)
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“Y/N L/N don’t you dare!”
“Fuck you!”
“Put the trophy down, damn it!”
The sound of yelling and screaming fill the trailer as voices echo and bounce off the walls, your blotchy red cheeks and hot salty tears blurr your vision. Stinging and aching as you rub them hard, your father holds his arms up in defense as you throw your third place trophy against the wall behind him. Smashing the golden plastic to bits, a golden female racer falls off the tip and rolls under the counter.
You reach out behind you to grab your motocross helmet off the shelf, the sound of old first place metals clattering onto the ground. Your pictures lay shattered against the floor as the helmet hurdles straight for the door. Denting the metallic entrance.
“Fuck!” You scream, crying out and screaming to the dark abyss of the night. Another tournament, but this time you weren’t coming home with a first place trophy and a happy trainer. No, instead, you have a third place shattered trophy, a dented helmet, a messed up dirt bike, and all you could do was scream. Y/N L/N the daughter of Erwin Smith the owner of Titans Motocross Race Tracks partnered with Levi Ackerman, was caught in third place. Motherless you were as you stood up for nights on end since the age of five riding your dirt bike, or at least till you could master turns. Your mother never supported your father's decision to put her eldest daughter in motocross back then.
In fact she was so against it that the time she birthed your baby sister Gabi the two agreed to have her in a more feminine sport.
Of course before the death of your mother, she knew you would one day break. You were competitive, impulsive, a control freak, a perfectionist. Of course you had friends in the titan team, but they were just friends. On the track they were competition.
But everyone understood that, Sasha and Mikasa knew that.
But that still wouldn’t stop you from poking fun at your friends.
But when it came to Aubrey Kelper; oh it’s on. That girl was known for being dirty on the track and off the track.
“You wanna make a scene? Fine by me, you wanna keep racing and go pro? Keep acting like that and I’ll cut that contract right up.” Your father threatened. His stern glare battling with your E/C ones as you battle silently.
Your breath hitches, the dirt and dust on the tip of your nose and cheeks reflect the bloochy tinted skin beneath your sun burn, skin burning from the tears.
You stay silent, your face moving towards the direction your helmet sat. Walking over to it and grabbing it. “Now go shower, I’ll drive the trailer back home. Did you make sure you have all your stuff?” Erwin arches a brow taking a look behind his daughter, his keys jingling in his hands as he tosses them around. He was referring to the bike and gear, “The bikes trashed, I need to bring it into the shop, see if they could maybe fix it up for me again. If not, I gotta get a new bike by next week, tomorrow I won't be able to ride.”
Your father sighs in frustration before going to grab his cowboy hat off the top of his head. “Y/N, I’m really trying here. You need-”
“Yeah yeah yeah, try harder. You tell me every fucking day, I’m not the daughter you wanted me to be I get it.” You snap your head towards him, glaring. In your head, you always believed the reason your parents put Gabi in a much more feminine sport like gymnastics, ballet, and figure skating was to keep her away from being like You. Yes, you had the grades, the beauty, skill and talent. But your father wasn’t always so pleased when you hung out with her current boyfriend, Floch, who also happens to be a Dirtbike for Marley Race Tracks Motorsports.
And, of course your tracks didn’t really collide well with their group of racers. Never did, never will.
But it also didn’t collide well with your father, “You listen up here young lady, I don’t know where this little attitude of yours is coming from. But I don’t like the way you’re speaking to me. So if you don’t wanna be grounded this summer I suggest you keep that smart mouth of yours shut. Now go pick up this mess, and go shower. I’ll go check the back to see if everything is ready to go.” He sneers, walking passed you and slamming the door shut causing you to jump.
A small tear of frustration escaped the corner of your. eyes, mascara smudging underneath your eyes slightly. Turning your body to face the bathroom, you walk in to see your dusty nose and piercing red eyes. Your phone in hand from the counter top she looks at the chipped screen, a picture of you and Floch appears as the wallpaper on the screen. A photo of the two of you your father definitely wouldn’t approve of if he were to happen to see. Levi, who also happened to just be an Uncle figure to you already lectured your ear off when he peered at your phone once. And that was something you simply don't wanna repeat, the photo is of you bent over his bathroom counter - his hand pressed hard against the small of your back as you slightly arch your butt to his pelvis. He smiles so wide as your freshly manicured fingers cover your face partially.
Though the two of you never did anything like what your friends have done. Or what your father thinks the two of you do when you’re alone, the closest you have ever gotten was in his pool last summer. Floch has certainly went for it. Especially when you were pressed hard into the side of the pool, you legs wrapped tightly around his waist. Your father walked in… a memory you want to delete forever. You look straight at yourself in the mirror in front, wiping away the tears. The more you tried the more times you got hurt. There will always be competitions, they will always get harder. You knew that. But what you didn’t know was that your father loved you more than anything.
Even when it seemed like he hated you.
And he’d do anything to save you from the path you were walking down, even if he had to send you away…
Three nights later:
“Shhh! Mikasa! Sasha! You both are gonna get me caught!” You say, struggling to get out your bedroom window, your feet dangling on the right side of the house. Sasha presses her palms against her mouth, as Mikasa facepalms. “You fucking idiot,” she curses as you continue to struggle.
“Just let go!” Sasha whispers, containing her laughter, “Are you kidding? I’m not falling!” You whine, you attempt to gain better leverage but it’s no use. The flower beds would be crushed and you’re father would definitely hear your seeing as you were dangling outside of his window. “You should’ve just went through the front door!” Mikasa scolds you, taking a picture to capture the memory. You give her a slumped look, annoyed, “Sorry,” She apologizes.
You decide to finally let go of the railing, falling into the flower beds tipping over the pots.
The two burst out into laughter, “Come on we’re gonna be late for the party!“ Sasha whines, jogging to pick you up, Mikasa runs to start the car. “Don’t turn on the lights, dad will see!”
Sasha lifts you up and pats down your jeans, the both of you run and throw open the passenger door. Climbing into the car and pressing the gas.
The party is full, crowded, and bumping. Music blaring from the outside as cans of beer and bottles litter the lawn. People smoke on the porch couch and there are two people passed out. But you, Mikasa, and Sasha walk by them and straight into the open house. Body sweat and weed filling your nose, afraid the smell will stick onto you even though you showered. Sasha leaves to find Nicollo, Mikasa holds your hand and leaves you into the living room.
“Hey! Where’s Floch?!” You yell over the blasting music, Mikasa shrugs and let’s go of your hand. “Go find him! I’ll be around, I might go hang with Sasha and her boyfriend!” She exclaims, whipping her black hair over her shoulders. You nod and make your wait upstairs, fishing into your back pocket and dialing his number.
In two rings he picks up, “Babe! Are you here?”
“Yeah,” you say walking down the hall heading to his room, “Are you in your room?”
“Yeah spilt some beer on me, come in, we can go in the pool after.”
You walk closer to his door and turn open the knob, his brown hair covering his eyes as he turns back to look at you. His room covered in racing trophies, photos, autographs, and track signs. You smile at him, closing the door behind you. He opens his arms out, his legs open wide for you to get close. Your body makes it way between his legs, his arms wrap around your waist and his face lays on your stomach. “I missed you,” He says, “Does dad know you’re here? I highly doubt that old man knows.”
You smack the back of his head lightly, “Watch it.”
He chuckles, “Sorry,” his face digs into your stomach. You run your hands through his hair smoothing out the peices that stuck out. Floch has been your boyfriend since freshman year of High School. He was all you knew and your friends sometimes said you deserved better, he in your eyes, was doing the best he could. You loved him. You love him. But, that doesn’t erase the times he’s cheated on you, the times he’s maybe ripped you out his car by your hair and let you walk alone at night, the times he’s cussed you out only inches away when you swore if Mikasa wasn’t there he’d hit you. That is why Erwin Smith, hated Floch, not because he was dating you. But the way he treated you, the fight that broke out at you home in front of Gabi was terrifying, you planned a dinner so maybe your father and him could establish at least a civil bond. But instead the mashed potatoes were thrown, the dining room table was flipped over, glasses were shattered and Floch was kicked out of your house by the hem of his shirt.
He was a terrible boyfriend.
But you don’t see that.
He pulls you in tighter leaving small kisses on your naval, you feel your phone erupt in messages and calls but Floch just slithers his hand to your back pocket and throws the phone to the other end of the room. “You like the party? Even better than my last one.”
You scoff, “Whyd you even throw one after what happened last time?”
“School ends tomorrow, babe. Summer is just getting started.” He smirks, pulling you down on top of him. You feel the mattress between your fingers, you’re straddling his hips, your crotch on his pelvis as he grinds against you. “You and me, all summer long baby.” He smiles, the friction between your thighs intensifying with each thrust. You grind back down, his hard just pocking through the fabric of his jeans.
“We can’t do this here..” You moan as he pulls himself up to meet your neck, peppering small kisses on your skin, biting and marking.
“You never want to do it.” He groans as you slide off of him, you don’t want to tell him that you just don’t feel ready to do it with him. You extend your hand to him, pulling him up from the bed. He kisses your forehead, and grabs you by the neck, his fingers tightening on the sides as he pulls you in. “I love you, you know that?”
You nod.
“You’re mine right? You know your mine.”
You nod again.
You spend the night, drinking, smoking with Floch and jumping into the pool. Your hairs a mess and your mascara is smeared all on your bottom lid. Flochs arm is draped over your shoulders pouring beer into your mouth when Mikasa and Sasha come running to you. They yank you away, leading you into the bathroom. Mikasa quickly rushes to place eye drops in your heavy red eyes, and Sasha cleans your smeared makeup, patting down your hair. Confused, you push off their pestering hands. Scolding them, “What the hell! What’s up with you guys-“
“Your dad is outside!” Sasha yells, cleaning you up and spraying perfume on your chest - spirtzing all over your body. An electric shock waves over you, and panic settles down in the pit of you stomach. “Oh shit-“
You run out and head straight upstairs to Floches room, picking your thrown phone from off the floor. Your eyes widening at the amount of notifications.
Six missed calls from Hitch
Ten missed calls, three voicemails, and 26 texts from Sasha
Ten texts from Mikasa
Two missed calls from Levi
Ten texts from Hange
And 56 text, 23 voicemails, and 52 missed calls from Dad.
Your heart pounds against your rib cage, fear settling in the bottom of your stomach. Your father is outside, most likely with Levi. And you are gonna be the laughingstock of the school, of the track. Nobody will ever let that down. Sasha and Mikasa storm in the room, “Your dads asking for you! He’s inside, what do we do!”
Before you can answer; a tall broad figure stands behind them, a brooding glare from him as he looks down at you. Sasha and Mikasa jump, moving aside. His longs strides and loud boots clank against the wooden floor boards. His blond hair disheveled from sleep. He’s still in pajamas, he’s only got a pair of boots on. You look up at him, “H-Hey daddy..”
“Let’s go. You’re done.”
He pulls you by the arm, throwing you in the back of his truck. Swinging the door closed behind you, noticing another figure in the passenger seat, you see Levi staring down at you. He tschs, “It’s too early for this, you know.” He mutters, crossing his arms. Your father opens his door and climbings in the drivers seat, pressing the gas immediately, leaving the party behind.
Embarrassment settles in as your Father shoots you a glare through the rear view mirror. His eyes making eye contact with you for a spilt second, he doesn’t utter a word. Not even when he drops Levi back home and not when you make it up your driveway. He just pulls his key out roughly, and throws his seatbelt over his shoulder - opening the car door harshly and ignoring you.
You step out of the car sheepishly, walking like a wounded dog up the porch stairs. “Dad I-“
He silences you with a deep glare; “Don’t speak.” He unlocks the front door and disarms the alarm system. You walk behind him and shut the door closed, ready for hell to fall. He turns around, “Do you have any idea what time it is?! The sacrifices I have done for you, to make sure your safe. You could be in a ditch, you could be hurt. And you expect me to stay asleep, let you throw your life and future away- Is.. Is that weed I smell? And beer on your shirt!?” Erwin throws his hands up in anger, “I don’t know what to do with you anymore! Do you not understand i’m fighting everyday to keep you in this sport! This career! This is a family sport - if you fuck up you’ll never race again they won’t let you on the track! What more do I have to do!?” He yells, you wince, his yelling was rare.
You notice Gabi, 10 years old, at the top of the staircase. Tiredly rubbing her eyes as she watches the argument unfold. Erwin tells her to go to bed.
“That’s it, I’m gonna rip up your contract.” He reaches in to his brief case on the kitchen counter, and pulls out a piece of paper. A copy of your signed contract, he holds the paper with his fingers in a tearable fashion. “You don’t have what it takes-“
You throw your hands up, “Wait no! Stop- I’m sorry! Please just don’t rip it up!” You plead, watching intently at his hands. He looks up at you, eyes painted in disappointment before he sets down the paper. “Go to your room. Now.”
You nod your head, placing your hands down on your side.
“And give me your phone, your motorcycle keys, ipad, your laptop and one last thing.” He says sternly, demanding the items in question. You turn around from the second step of the staircase, anger from the embarrassment earlier bubbles in your stomach. You throw yourself around, facing him. “What?! What else do you want-“
“Pack your bags.”
You’re left speechless.
“You’re spending the summer in Houston, hope you can last two months without that boy..” He glares at your frame. You stand in shock, anger spilling over, as you storm upstairs. “Fuck you!” You spat.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Authors Note: Wow, you made it to the end of chapter one! Congratulations! I hope you enjoyed, I’m so excited for this fic. Cant wait to introduce hot cowboy dirtbike racer eren!!! Tag list is open, tell me your thoughts! Inbox me ideas i’m open!
Summary | You’re a single mom with one very talkative and intrusive daughter. She will not sleep until she meddeled her way into getting you a husband. Her newest target? Her kindergarten teacher- Eren Jaeger
Wordcount | 12K (I’m so sorry omg)
Pairing | Eren x Reader
Notes | DILF vibes Eren, Cabin Eren, MILF reader hehe, language, anxiety, absentee father, Modern AU, THIS IS A LONG ONE, SO MUCH PINING, literally as slow burn as a oneshot can be, SFW, so much fluff, making out, mentions of one night stands
The 21st century is a lawless land when it comes to dating. Most people use dating apps. They spend hours sifting through their best photos from over the years- then they spend another hour trying to sell themselves in a tiny little 500 character limited bio. Some people go the organic way choosing to pry on singles at a bar, cafe, or even the watercooler at their office. If you’re old-school you may turn to the personal ads in the newspaper. There may be some hidden gems amongst the serial killers who still post in the newspaper. Seriously though. Newspaper dating ads? Redflag.
There are tons of options out there! But the most unusual you may wonder? Getting your five-year-old daughter to set you up.
Warning: Language, implied sexual content, abuse, violence: this book will explore topics of abuse further down the line please don’t read if you’re a minor. Also I originally wrote this as a Natsu x Lucy book for Fairytail but I kept it and now it’s an Eren fic. So if y’all saw it on wattpad SHOUT OUT TO U!
Rating: M
SYNOPSIS: -> Y/N L/N wasn't always the most well behaved girl. She got into trouble plenty of times and was constantly on her fathers mind. As a dirt bike racer she plans on going pro but when she makes a big mistake, her father leaves her one choice. Spend the summer with her grandparents with no social media or technology far away from her friends and boyfriend.
Eren Jaeger, a 21 year old pro dirt bike racer who visits Houston Texas for the summer when his grandparents get sick. But when the girl next door catches his attention he cant help but wonder her name.
Can Eren help Y/N pull her life together or will she return back to her old ways and blow it all?
Chapter One: I’m a mess (and I’m gonna blow it all)
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“Y/N L/N don’t you dare!”
“Fuck you!”
“Put the trophy down, damn it!”
The sound of yelling and screaming fill the trailer as voices echo and bounce off the walls, your blotchy red cheeks and hot salty tears blurr your vision. Stinging and aching as you rub them hard, your father holds his arms up in defense as you throw your third place trophy against the wall behind him. Smashing the golden plastic to bits, a golden female racer falls off the tip and rolls under the counter.
You reach out behind you to grab your motocross helmet off the shelf, the sound of old first place metals clattering onto the ground. Your pictures lay shattered against the floor as the helmet hurdles straight for the door. Denting the metallic entrance.
“Fuck!” You scream, crying out and screaming to the dark abyss of the night. Another tournament, but this time you weren’t coming home with a first place trophy and a happy trainer. No, instead, you have a third place shattered trophy, a dented helmet, a messed up dirt bike, and all you could do was scream. Y/N L/N the daughter of Erwin Smith the owner of Titans Motocross Race Tracks partnered with Levi Ackerman, was caught in third place. Motherless you were as you stood up for nights on end since the age of five riding your dirt bike, or at least till you could master turns. Your mother never supported your father's decision to put her eldest daughter in motocross back then.
In fact she was so against it that the time she birthed your baby sister Gabi the two agreed to have her in a more feminine sport.
Of course before the death of your mother, she knew you would one day break. You were competitive, impulsive, a control freak, a perfectionist. Of course you had friends in the titan team, but they were just friends. On the track they were competition.
But everyone understood that, Sasha and Mikasa knew that.
But that still wouldn’t stop you from poking fun at your friends.
But when it came to Aubrey Kelper; oh it’s on. That girl was known for being dirty on the track and off the track.
“You wanna make a scene? Fine by me, you wanna keep racing and go pro? Keep acting like that and I’ll cut that contract right up.” Your father threatened. His stern glare battling with your E/C ones as you battle silently.
Your breath hitches, the dirt and dust on the tip of your nose and cheeks reflect the bloochy tinted skin beneath your sun burn, skin burning from the tears.
You stay silent, your face moving towards the direction your helmet sat. Walking over to it and grabbing it. “Now go shower, I’ll drive the trailer back home. Did you make sure you have all your stuff?” Erwin arches a brow taking a look behind his daughter, his keys jingling in his hands as he tosses them around. He was referring to the bike and gear, “The bikes trashed, I need to bring it into the shop, see if they could maybe fix it up for me again. If not, I gotta get a new bike by next week, tomorrow I won't be able to ride.”
Your father sighs in frustration before going to grab his cowboy hat off the top of his head. “Y/N, I’m really trying here. You need-”
“Yeah yeah yeah, try harder. You tell me every fucking day, I’m not the daughter you wanted me to be I get it.” You snap your head towards him, glaring. In your head, you always believed the reason your parents put Gabi in a much more feminine sport like gymnastics, ballet, and figure skating was to keep her away from being like You. Yes, you had the grades, the beauty, skill and talent. But your father wasn’t always so pleased when you hung out with her current boyfriend, Floch, who also happens to be a Dirtbike for Marley Race Tracks Motorsports.
And, of course your tracks didn’t really collide well with their group of racers. Never did, never will.
But it also didn’t collide well with your father, “You listen up here young lady, I don’t know where this little attitude of yours is coming from. But I don’t like the way you’re speaking to me. So if you don’t wanna be grounded this summer I suggest you keep that smart mouth of yours shut. Now go pick up this mess, and go shower. I’ll go check the back to see if everything is ready to go.” He sneers, walking passed you and slamming the door shut causing you to jump.
A small tear of frustration escaped the corner of your. eyes, mascara smudging underneath your eyes slightly. Turning your body to face the bathroom, you walk in to see your dusty nose and piercing red eyes. Your phone in hand from the counter top she looks at the chipped screen, a picture of you and Floch appears as the wallpaper on the screen. A photo of the two of you your father definitely wouldn’t approve of if he were to happen to see. Levi, who also happened to just be an Uncle figure to you already lectured your ear off when he peered at your phone once. And that was something you simply don't wanna repeat, the photo is of you bent over his bathroom counter - his hand pressed hard against the small of your back as you slightly arch your butt to his pelvis. He smiles so wide as your freshly manicured fingers cover your face partially.
Though the two of you never did anything like what your friends have done. Or what your father thinks the two of you do when you’re alone, the closest you have ever gotten was in his pool last summer. Floch has certainly went for it. Especially when you were pressed hard into the side of the pool, you legs wrapped tightly around his waist. Your father walked in… a memory you want to delete forever. You look straight at yourself in the mirror in front, wiping away the tears. The more you tried the more times you got hurt. There will always be competitions, they will always get harder. You knew that. But what you didn’t know was that your father loved you more than anything.
Even when it seemed like he hated you.
And he’d do anything to save you from the path you were walking down, even if he had to send you away…
Three nights later:
“Shhh! Mikasa! Sasha! You both are gonna get me caught!” You say, struggling to get out your bedroom window, your feet dangling on the right side of the house. Sasha presses her palms against her mouth, as Mikasa facepalms. “You fucking idiot,” she curses as you continue to struggle.
“Just let go!” Sasha whispers, containing her laughter, “Are you kidding? I’m not falling!” You whine, you attempt to gain better leverage but it’s no use. The flower beds would be crushed and you’re father would definitely hear your seeing as you were dangling outside of his window. “You should’ve just went through the front door!” Mikasa scolds you, taking a picture to capture the memory. You give her a slumped look, annoyed, “Sorry,” She apologizes.
You decide to finally let go of the railing, falling into the flower beds tipping over the pots.
The two burst out into laughter, “Come on we’re gonna be late for the party!“ Sasha whines, jogging to pick you up, Mikasa runs to start the car. “Don’t turn on the lights, dad will see!”
Sasha lifts you up and pats down your jeans, the both of you run and throw open the passenger door. Climbing into the car and pressing the gas.
The party is full, crowded, and bumping. Music blaring from the outside as cans of beer and bottles litter the lawn. People smoke on the porch couch and there are two people passed out. But you, Mikasa, and Sasha walk by them and straight into the open house. Body sweat and weed filling your nose, afraid the smell will stick onto you even though you showered. Sasha leaves to find Nicollo, Mikasa holds your hand and leaves you into the living room.
“Hey! Where’s Floch?!” You yell over the blasting music, Mikasa shrugs and let’s go of your hand. “Go find him! I’ll be around, I might go hang with Sasha and her boyfriend!” She exclaims, whipping her black hair over her shoulders. You nod and make your wait upstairs, fishing into your back pocket and dialing his number.
In two rings he picks up, “Babe! Are you here?”
“Yeah,” you say walking down the hall heading to his room, “Are you in your room?”
“Yeah spilt some beer on me, come in, we can go in the pool after.”
You walk closer to his door and turn open the knob, his brown hair covering his eyes as he turns back to look at you. His room covered in racing trophies, photos, autographs, and track signs. You smile at him, closing the door behind you. He opens his arms out, his legs open wide for you to get close. Your body makes it way between his legs, his arms wrap around your waist and his face lays on your stomach. “I missed you,” He says, “Does dad know you’re here? I highly doubt that old man knows.”
You smack the back of his head lightly, “Watch it.”
He chuckles, “Sorry,” his face digs into your stomach. You run your hands through his hair smoothing out the peices that stuck out. Floch has been your boyfriend since freshman year of High School. He was all you knew and your friends sometimes said you deserved better, he in your eyes, was doing the best he could. You loved him. You love him. But, that doesn’t erase the times he’s cheated on you, the times he’s maybe ripped you out his car by your hair and let you walk alone at night, the times he’s cussed you out only inches away when you swore if Mikasa wasn’t there he’d hit you. That is why Erwin Smith, hated Floch, not because he was dating you. But the way he treated you, the fight that broke out at you home in front of Gabi was terrifying, you planned a dinner so maybe your father and him could establish at least a civil bond. But instead the mashed potatoes were thrown, the dining room table was flipped over, glasses were shattered and Floch was kicked out of your house by the hem of his shirt.
He was a terrible boyfriend.
But you don’t see that.
He pulls you in tighter leaving small kisses on your naval, you feel your phone erupt in messages and calls but Floch just slithers his hand to your back pocket and throws the phone to the other end of the room. “You like the party? Even better than my last one.”
You scoff, “Whyd you even throw one after what happened last time?”
“School ends tomorrow, babe. Summer is just getting started.” He smirks, pulling you down on top of him. You feel the mattress between your fingers, you’re straddling his hips, your crotch on his pelvis as he grinds against you. “You and me, all summer long baby.” He smiles, the friction between your thighs intensifying with each thrust. You grind back down, his hard just pocking through the fabric of his jeans.
“We can’t do this here..” You moan as he pulls himself up to meet your neck, peppering small kisses on your skin, biting and marking.
“You never want to do it.” He groans as you slide off of him, you don’t want to tell him that you just don’t feel ready to do it with him. You extend your hand to him, pulling him up from the bed. He kisses your forehead, and grabs you by the neck, his fingers tightening on the sides as he pulls you in. “I love you, you know that?”
You nod.
“You’re mine right? You know your mine.”
You nod again.
You spend the night, drinking, smoking with Floch and jumping into the pool. Your hairs a mess and your mascara is smeared all on your bottom lid. Flochs arm is draped over your shoulders pouring beer into your mouth when Mikasa and Sasha come running to you. They yank you away, leading you into the bathroom. Mikasa quickly rushes to place eye drops in your heavy red eyes, and Sasha cleans your smeared makeup, patting down your hair. Confused, you push off their pestering hands. Scolding them, “What the hell! What’s up with you guys-“
“Your dad is outside!” Sasha yells, cleaning you up and spraying perfume on your chest - spirtzing all over your body. An electric shock waves over you, and panic settles down in the pit of you stomach. “Oh shit-“
You run out and head straight upstairs to Floches room, picking your thrown phone from off the floor. Your eyes widening at the amount of notifications.
Six missed calls from Hitch
Ten missed calls, three voicemails, and 26 texts from Sasha
Ten texts from Mikasa
Two missed calls from Levi
Ten texts from Hange
And 56 text, 23 voicemails, and 52 missed calls from Dad.
Your heart pounds against your rib cage, fear settling in the bottom of your stomach. Your father is outside, most likely with Levi. And you are gonna be the laughingstock of the school, of the track. Nobody will ever let that down. Sasha and Mikasa storm in the room, “Your dads asking for you! He’s inside, what do we do!”
Before you can answer; a tall broad figure stands behind them, a brooding glare from him as he looks down at you. Sasha and Mikasa jump, moving aside. His longs strides and loud boots clank against the wooden floor boards. His blond hair disheveled from sleep. He’s still in pajamas, he’s only got a pair of boots on. You look up at him, “H-Hey daddy..”
“Let’s go. You’re done.”
He pulls you by the arm, throwing you in the back of his truck. Swinging the door closed behind you, noticing another figure in the passenger seat, you see Levi staring down at you. He tschs, “It’s too early for this, you know.” He mutters, crossing his arms. Your father opens his door and climbings in the drivers seat, pressing the gas immediately, leaving the party behind.
Embarrassment settles in as your Father shoots you a glare through the rear view mirror. His eyes making eye contact with you for a spilt second, he doesn’t utter a word. Not even when he drops Levi back home and not when you make it up your driveway. He just pulls his key out roughly, and throws his seatbelt over his shoulder - opening the car door harshly and ignoring you.
You step out of the car sheepishly, walking like a wounded dog up the porch stairs. “Dad I-“
He silences you with a deep glare; “Don’t speak.” He unlocks the front door and disarms the alarm system. You walk behind him and shut the door closed, ready for hell to fall. He turns around, “Do you have any idea what time it is?! The sacrifices I have done for you, to make sure your safe. You could be in a ditch, you could be hurt. And you expect me to stay asleep, let you throw your life and future away- Is.. Is that weed I smell? And beer on your shirt!?” Erwin throws his hands up in anger, “I don’t know what to do with you anymore! Do you not understand i’m fighting everyday to keep you in this sport! This career! This is a family sport - if you fuck up you’ll never race again they won’t let you on the track! What more do I have to do!?” He yells, you wince, his yelling was rare.
You notice Gabi, 10 years old, at the top of the staircase. Tiredly rubbing her eyes as she watches the argument unfold. Erwin tells her to go to bed.
“That’s it, I’m gonna rip up your contract.” He reaches in to his brief case on the kitchen counter, and pulls out a piece of paper. A copy of your signed contract, he holds the paper with his fingers in a tearable fashion. “You don’t have what it takes-“
You throw your hands up, “Wait no! Stop- I’m sorry! Please just don’t rip it up!” You plead, watching intently at his hands. He looks up at you, eyes painted in disappointment before he sets down the paper. “Go to your room. Now.”
You nod your head, placing your hands down on your side.
“And give me your phone, your motorcycle keys, ipad, your laptop and one last thing.” He says sternly, demanding the items in question. You turn around from the second step of the staircase, anger from the embarrassment earlier bubbles in your stomach. You throw yourself around, facing him. “What?! What else do you want-“
“Pack your bags.”
You’re left speechless.
“You’re spending the summer in Houston, hope you can last two months without that boy..” He glares at your frame. You stand in shock, anger spilling over, as you storm upstairs. “Fuck you!” You spat.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Authors Note: Wow, you made it to the end of chapter one! Congratulations! I hope you enjoyed, I’m so excited for this fic. Cant wait to introduce hot cowboy dirtbike racer eren!!! Tag list is open, tell me your thoughts! Inbox me ideas i’m open!
I’m very sad to announce this but The Dragon Kings Queen will be placed on hiatus and possibly canceled due to me just wanting to write oneshots and side stories and create new series’s while also focusing on other projects.
I’m so sorry everyone I simply kinda lost my thought process on where this book was going and I don’t have to drive to write it, i find it so exhausting when I do and just so dreadful. I’m working on a few new stories but I just wanted to let you all know. I was thinking about remaking it seeing as I wasn’t happy but I personally don’t think the writing was my best. I can do so much better and it just feels like any other story you can find - mediocre and just there.
I have a new collection coming up in apologies for not making a halloween or christmas series. I’m very excited to share it with you, also be expecting more AOT as well.
I’m very sad to announce this but The Dragon Kings Queen will be placed on hiatus and possibly canceled due to me just wanting to write oneshots and side stories and create new series’s while also focusing on other projects.
I’m so sorry everyone I simply kinda lost my thought process on where this book was going and I don’t have to drive to write it, i find it so exhausting when I do and just so dreadful. I’m working on a few new stories but I just wanted to let you all know. I was thinking about remaking it seeing as I wasn’t happy but I personally don’t think the writing was my best. I can do so much better and it just feels like any other story you can find - mediocre and just there.
I have a new collection coming up in apologies for not making a halloween or christmas series. I’m very excited to share it with you, also be expecting more AOT as well.
Warning: ANGST, heavy angst, implied sex, death of multiple characters. Characters at 18. Based off the song Red by taylor swift.
Loving him was red…
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Loving him was heart glasses and chocolate covered strawberries on the beach, laying between his legs, his soft hum as he sang along to a taylor swift song, “This is my favorite song,” he said as he sang along to Red.
Loving him was like a taylor swift song..
Loving him was kissing in the lake on a summer night watching all the fireworks blow up in the dead of the night, his grip on you tightening as the both of you floated in the cool water inhaling each other’s scents.
Loving him was running into his arms after a tough game, the Titans making their way to victory as their star QB is offered another scholarship. Kissing his sweaty cheeks and giggling when Jean and Connie gag while respectively hugging their significant others.
Loving him was humming and writing the lyrics to a taylor swift song on the back of your closet door while hanging up pictures of you and Eren from those summer nights.
Loving him was holding onto each others sweaty bodies as you both come down from the high only the two of you could make each other feel.
Loving him was cleaning his bloodied knuckles after defending you at Jeans party because some asshole kept calling you Jaegers bitch. Kissing each individual knuckle as he seethes in pain. But he doesn’t care, he loved you nonetheless and a fight to defend you was worth it.
Loving him was sneaking him in through your bedroom window, giggling as he kisses your neck ever so softly. His hand creeping up to your mouth just to keep you down so the two of you don’t get caught watching Marvel Movies.
Loving him was opening college acceptance letters together and celebrating how the two of you got in with respective scholarships.
Loving him was shoving your toes in his face while he’s driving, annoying him till he play bites you. Laughing when you yell at him for biting your pinky toe.
Loving him was crying in his arms after a heated argument, forgiving eachother instantly, apologizing for raising your voices at one another.
Loving him was cheering him on from the stands beside his parents in his football hoodie, calling out, “Go Jaeger! Whooo!”
Loving him was holding him tightly in your arms one last time, so and completely unaware of the tragedy up ahead. So completely in love, so utterly in love. “I love you,” you say into his shoulder, shutting your eyes tightly. Tugging him closer to you he grins, “I love you more, I’ll be back tomorrow morning.” he said while entering his car with his friends, only dropping by to give you a wet sloppy kiss. You smile, “Till tomorrow.”
But tomorrow never came.
Loving him was wishing he drove safe home after celebrating the championship with his teammates.
Loving him was rewatching all the videos, skimming through all the photos late at night and crying yourself to sleep. Because hearing his voice is the only way you can sleep.
Loving him was laying a fresh bouquet of flowers at his locker, pictures of him, Jean, Connie and Armin all litter the hallways. As crying students and faculty members preached safe driving.
Loving him was nearly collapsing at his funeral just because you were just so exhausted..
Loving him was kissing his old helmet and wearing his jersey at the memorial.
Loving him was crying alongside Annie, Mikasa and Sasha cursing at the drunk driver who just seemly had to go home that same exact night not calling for an uber.
Loving him was tearing down the wall of pictures you had made with him in anger, screaming how if he just would’ve listened to you and stayed home, all them just stay home that night. Crying as you selfishly rip up the last physical thing you had left from Jaeger.
Loving him was staying up late taping up each photo back together, sobbing how stupid you were.
Loving him is growing up.. and walking the stage with his picture in you locket and shaking hands with Principal Erwin while you received your diploma.
Loving him was moving his tassel for him, the picture of him on a empty seat beside you. Handing him his diploma with tears in your eyes.
Loving him was sitting at his grave, washing his stone delicately, talking about the new boy you met when you were off to college. Telling him about how badly you missed him and how hard it is to still move on, a bird perches up on his stone when you ask if he thinks Porco is a good person and you smile as the bird whistles. “I think so too…”
Loving him is blasting that exact same taylor swift song in your car, holding hands with your boyfriend Porco Galliard, the cans of paint in the back seat of your car clank together.
“Forgetting him was like tryin' know somebody you never met.. But loving him was red” Porco says, his hand on his hips with a paint brush in his left. “Hey, babe? What’s this in the back of your closet?” he points to the scribbled blue lyrics decorated with hearts all around, the initials E+Y/I, in the center of a red heart. You stand up, patting your hands on your knees and wiping off the sweat on your brow. “Oh that,” you smile, “Those are taylor swift lyrics. I used to love her album Red.”
“Do you want me to paint over it? Theres some tape marks on the wall, but if it means something to you I can just not paint over it.”
Memories flood your brain, his laugh, his voice, you can almost hear it. “It’s okay, Y/N.” A chill runs down your back, a bird perching on your window.
You nod your head, “It’s okay, you can paint over it. I’ll always remember them anyways.”
