fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this
honestly i never thought the phrase “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation
Having to clean the shower is so fucking annoying. It’s clean in there. That’s where I go to get clean. It’s clean dude trust me. Stop fucking growing bacteria and stuff man this is the clean locale. You’re embarrassing me in front of the sink
you got a fast car i want a ticket to anywhere maybe we make a deal maybe together we can get somewhere any place is better starting from zero got nothing to lose maybe we'll make something me myself i got nothing to prove you got a fast car i got a plan to get us outta here i been working at the convenience store managed to save just a little bit of money won't have to drive too far just 'cross the border and into the city you & i can both get job & finally see what it means to be living see my old man's got a problem he live with the bottle that's the way it is he says his body's too old for working his body's too young to look like his my mama went off & left him she wanted more from life than he could give i said somebody's got to take care of him so i quit school & that's what i did you got a fast car is it fast enough so we can fly away? we gotta make a decision leave tonight or live & die this way so i remember when we were driving, driving in your car speed so fast it felt like i was drunk city lights lay out before us & your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder & i i had a feeling that i belonged i i had a feeling i could be someone be someone be someone you got a fast car we go cruising, entertain ourselves you still ain't got a job & i work in the market as a checkout girl i know things will get better you'll find work and i'll get promoted we'll move out of the shelter buy a bigger house & live in the suburbs so i remember when we were driving, driving in your car speed so fast it felt like i was drunk city lights lay out before us & your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder & i i had a feeling that i belonged i i had a feeling i could be someone be someone be someone you got a fast car i got a job that pays all our bills you stay out drinking late at the bar see more of your friends than you do of your kids i'd always hoped for better thought maybe together you & me'd find it i got no plans, i ain't going nowhere take your fast car & keep on driving so i remember when we were driving, driving in your car speed so fast it felt like i was drunk city lights lay out before us & your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder & i i had a feeling that I belonged i i had a feeling I could be someone be someone be someone you got a fast car is it fast enough so you can fly away? you gotta make a decision leave tonight or live and die this way
right???! i need to talk about this for a moment because. it's so magical to me. like usually when you see old paintings of warsaw you can't recognize anything - it's been bombed to hell in the 40s, and especially in the city centre everything had to be rebuilt basically from scratch (sorry to all the other cities that had to give their bricks away. btw. i know its a sore spot.)
and yet the old town is basically identical as it has been before the war, to the point that when i first saw that painting i was like "oh fuck, i know exactly where this is and how to get there"
idk this painting is like. so special to me. i went there on tuesday because i had a lot of spare time and i realized it was getting dark and it struck me that i could take this photo and it's not exactly aligned because i saw the biker and had to be quick so i could catch him in the same spot as the carriage in the painting but it's just so. idk. it's incredible to me that i can compare which windows were lit on that evening 131 years ago... that even the ornament remains the same... that the painting feels like a cloudy memory and not just a scene
still mad about smart TVs. that shit should be in a separate box like you can literally buy one of them androidtv boxes for £30. it doesn't need its own ip address it doesn't need its own app store it doesn't need to replicate the functionality every device plugged into it already has
i keep promising myself i won't become another technophobe yelling about those "dang newfangled machines" or whatever. that i won't Get Worse until going back to punchcards unironically seems like a good idea. that i'll enjoy new things as they come out.
but so much is actively evil, hostile or otherwise enshittified. i don't want to track my greebles with splorp i don't want to pay a teehee subscription to get round cacophany's file limits i don't need 17 ways to skrimple my scronk 7 of which secretly activate scrungly plus ultimate i don't need to link it to my flowolf account i don't want to manage it with the flowby mowby i don't care if poob does or does not has it for me. i don['t care
i want a big screen whose ENTIRE job is to show me whatever device i plug into it. and also audio. i want to save my documents. on the computer. that i'm using. i want to own the media i buy. i want tech that is fat, properly cooled, simpler, serviceable by a normal person, and not forcing me to constantly select the "onlly spy on me a little bit" box every couple weeks.
at the insane stage of character obsession where i start getting the urge to post pngs of them every five seconds like im showing ppl a picture of my stupid ass boyfriend that nobody likes but me
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people are getting high as fuck on new stupid drug called "night drawing" its making them stay iup all the goddamn night drawing. and brother let me tell you. the drawings. not even good
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