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Beasts Masterlist
Beasts Universe
Beasts
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
Part 11
Part 12
Part 13
Part 14
Part 15
Part 16
Part 17
Choices
First Spark
Trust
Touch
Breed
Vulnerable
Heir
Guard
Connection
Protector
Information
Misc In Universe
Be Good To Her
Be Good To Her 2
Beasts Part 17
“You need to come home, Baby.”
I turn to find my mother standing in the middle of my old house’s living room. “I can’t.”
“You must.”
“Why?”
“So you’ll know the whole truth.”
“You could just tell me,” I state, moving through the room.
“I will,” she smiles, staring at a spot on the ceiling. “You have to come home first.”
“Your husband tortured me here,” I growl at the floor.
“Suffering brings strength.”
“I should be invincible then.”
“You’re stronger than you know.”
“I know I am pretty strong now,” I state, raising my eyes to the woman.
“Come home. Find me. Know the truth.”
I sit up straight up, panting. “Just another dream.” The same dream for a week. Every time I close my eyes.
“Come home,” my mother’s voice whispers through my mind.
Flopping back against my pillows. “I can’t. Can I?”
“You need to come home, Baby. So you’ll know the whole truth.”
“The whole truth of what?”
There is no answer.
Glancing at the clock, thirty minutes until shift change. The thought of waiting on Konnor entering and being dismissed from my mind. Something told me it was something I needed to do myself.
“If I want to get out without an entourage I needed to move.” I think, mulling over my options. “Fine Mom, you win.” Pulling myself from the bed I move to dress. Scribbling a quick note on a scape of paper, I leave it on my dresser. Went out. Be back soon. Moving through my nest, I find the hatch to descend down to the safe slash security room. Grabbing car keys from the hook by the door, I slide out and down the back stairwell.
X
I stare up at the house. The memories of my torture playing through my head.
“Ya can’t just disappear like that,” someone growls next to my ear.
“Shouldn’t you be sleeping, Pete,” I sigh, shaking the memories away.
“When the Ursus disappears they tend to call for all hands on deck,” Konnor comments.
“You could have just tracked me yourself, you didn’t need to involve Grumpy Bear.”
“You think I didn’t try to handle this myself? You know Pete better than that.”
“What are we doin’?”
“I thought I needed to get something here.”
“But,” Konnor supplies.
“Memories are too much. I can’t…”
Both men’s hands cover mine.
“I have nowhere anymore,” I finally sigh. “I don’t belong in the Packlands. I don’t belong in the Ursidae.”
“That’s not true. You belong with us,” Konnor states.
“Ya family,” Pete smirks. “We’re all broken somehow.”
“Besides you’re the only thing keeping the Ursidae running. Ursinus is too self-absorbed and Braun…Braun is not himself at the moment.”
“Whatcha need Tala?”
“It’s stupid but…” I suck in a deep breath. “When I was in the water I saw my mother…here. She told me I needed to do something but I have no idea what she was talking about. I’ve been having dreams with her telling me to come home,,, to come here. The answer is somewhere in there, I can just feel it.”
“Then let’s go find it.”
“I don’t even know what it is.”
“We’ll figure it out,” Konnor smiles, taking the keys from my hand.
“Ya don’t have to go in if ya don’t want,” Pete mummers when I don’t move.
“I can’t live in fear forever.”
“It’s not fear, it’s trauma.”
“Gotta face it either way. Come on Grumpy.”
I enter the house with Pete at my back.
“Where should we start,” Konnor asks.
“Not a clue. I can tell you there is nothing in the basement. I spent most of my time down there. There is nothing.”
“Ok,” Pete sighs, covering my shaking hands. “No basement. Let’s start over there,” he chin jerks towards the living room.
I nod following the bears into the room.
“Tell us about when you saw your mom, about the dreams.”
“When I…When I was in the water I was here on the couch. She was just reminding me of how strong I am. I confessed to her about how confused I am. How I am stumbling through my life now. How my strength is just a façade.”
“And the dreams?”
“It was just her telling me to come home to know the whole truth.”
“The whole truth about?”
“Not a clue,” I sigh, flopping onto the couch. I run through all the experiences that brought me here.
“Protect the Waheela,” my mother states to me.
“Do either of you know what a Waheela is?”
They both shake their heads as they move around the room.
“I was told to protect the Waheela.”
“We need Trent.”
“Trent had something more important than me to take care of.” Closing my eyes, I think about the dreams. My mother standing in here telling me to come home. My mother sitting on this couch. I could almost see her standing in front of me, staring. Staring at a point on the ceiling. Opening my eyes I stare at the same spot. Something about that spot. Standing, I move to the far wall beneath that spot. There is nothing noticeable about it. “Konnor. I need a boost.”
“What are you doing,” Pete asks.
“Something Mom was looking at. Uppies Big Man.”
Konner’s hands wrap around my hips, lifting.
“Ok, Mom. What’s up here?” Pressing on the ceiling, I find no secret panels. “Fuck.”
“Tala?”
“I had a hunch. I was wrong.” I bump my knuckles against the ceiling. “Put me down.”
“Stop,” Pete orders. “Tala do that again.”
“What? This?” I hit the ceiling again. I hear it. It’s hollow. Continuing to knock around and discover the hollow spot is square. “What’s above here,” I muse out loud, trying to remember the layout of the second floor.
“We need to go upstairs,” Konnor states as he sets me on my feet.
I gulp, nodding.
“Ya don’t have…” Pete starts before meeting my eyes. “We can do it for ya.”
“Mom said I have to do it.”
“Tala,” Pete starts as I start up the stairs.
“Can’t be live in fear forever,” I mutter, the reminder more for me than the men.
The smell hits me three steps before the mid staircase landing, causing me to gag.
“Tala,” Pete starts, joining me on the step. “Somethin’s dead up there.”
“I can tell,” I gasp, coving my nose with my shirt.
“Konnor, stay with Tala,” Pete orders, ascending.
Breathing through my mouth, I keep my shirt in place over my nose as I follow. Konnor at my back with one hand on the small of my back. Pete stops at my old torture room, hand on the knob. I stop, watching.
“Tala,” Konnor whispers, his fingers rub small circles tentatively. I notice a slight tremor shaking my torso. “Let Pete investigate and we’re finish your mission here. What’s above the living room? Do you remember?”
“Ummm…I think it would be that room,” I point behind Pete. “Dad’s office.”
“Don’t push yourself.”
“The room Pete is going in is more triggering than Dad’s office.” I move forward pushing the door open with a creak.
Konnor shuts the door softly behind us before looking around the room. I glance at the giant solid wood desk, the usual shine dulled by a layer of dust. The same layer that covers everything in the room.
“The man had good taste,” Konnor murmurs, studying the box of cigar.
“If you say so,” I snort. “Never took you as a cigar guy.”
“That other room was the room, wasn’t it? Where everything happened.”
“This whole house reeks of my torture but yeah, that was the room Dad chained me in during heats.”
“You are handling it better than I would.”
“It can’t hurt me anymore than it already has.”
“Yes, it can.”
“Does it still hurt you?”
“What?”
“Whatever happened that made you scared to love.”
“I…”
I pin him with a stare.
“I just don’t think about it.”
“How has that worked out for you,” I ask, studying the floor as I pace a small area.
“How has loving worked out for you?”
“With Braun…complicated. With Pete, Bayley, Trent…you, as easy as breathing.”
The tall man’s ears turn pink. “I would rather concentrate on that love. Not that that hurts.”
“Sometimes you can’t truly appreciate the good unless you experience the bad and hurtful,” I state, using my heel to test the floor.
“Sage advice,” he nods, a smirk quirking his lips.
“Mad I’m right,” I smirk.
“What are you doing?”
“Easier that crawling on the floor trying to find the hallow spot.”
“It would be closer to the window,” he nods, moving past me.
Moving to check the floor opposite the man. “Are you ever going to tell me?”
“Tell you what?”
“About the pain you keep buried so deeply. This is the house of pain after all and I can sense it every time we touch.”
“I told you everything there is to tell. Father caught me and Cameron. I lived, he didn’t.”
“And you blame yourself.”
“Am I supposed to blame Cameron?”
“No. The blame doesn’t belong to either of you. You know where the blame should lie, I really don’t think I need to say it.”
“I have no power to blame Father.”
I chuckle softly. “Blame doesn’t need power. I blamed my father for every second of the torture inflicted on me. Never had any power until months ago.”
“You have always had power. Hence why you scare the pants off my father and probably yours,” he smiles as I move a chair. My foot hits a hollow space.
“And you came to this conclusion how,” I ask, kneeling.
“I’ve watched you. Hannah’s orders,” he states, pulling me to my feet. “I didn’t trust you remember. She told me to watch you. And I did,” he smiles, pulling at the hollow spot. “I am happy for the time in a long time. Because I have a leader that is truly for her people. That’s power. You exude power.”
“I agree. Tala, hate ta ask but…”
“I got this, if you can handle…”
“After all that I’ve been through, I don’t know what I can’t handle at this point.”
“Tha smell probably,” Pete motions me towards the door.
“What is it,” I ask, crossing the hall.
“Bodies. Chained to tha walls.”
“How many?”
“Three.”
“Bear?” My hand lands on the doorframe
“Wolves.”
Steeling myself, I push through the doorway. The smell almost knocks me off my feet. A half changed wolf greets me, hanging limply in shackles. Another large body hangs from another set of shackles beside the first, slashes criss cross the man’s chest half healed. Ducking my head, I look at the man’s face and recognition overpowers me.
“Tala?”
“I know this man. He was the worst of them. He is the one…”
“The one that broke you at the end of your heats.”
“How did you…”
“Guessed,” he barks.
“They’re dead.”
“Not all of ‘em.”
I glance at the bear and he motions to the opposite wall. A shriveled body is curled against the wall, eyes closed but breathing shallowly. Reaching out with my power I find no one. “Open your eyes wolf.”
“You can’t command me, Omega,” a hoarse breathless voice answers.
My blood freezes as I recognize the voice despite hoarseness. “Sigma, actually,” I answer, forcing my voice to stay steady despite my fear. “So I am equal to you Dad.”
“Old fool.”
“I know you are,” I snort.
“Marrok.”
“I haven’t seen that.”
“Brainwashed. Just like your mother. Gonna kill you too.”
“No, Dad, Marrok is not going to kill you,” I state moving back towards the door. “He’s not going to torture you anymore either. Pete?”
We meet Konnor in the hallway holding a medium size lockbox.
“Tala?”
“There are kerosene tanks in the basement. The old fool kept it for heat during the winter. This is technically my house so…burn it down.”
“He is still alive,” Pete comments.
“He was supposed to be dead months ago.”
The man stares at me. “Don’t make an emotional decision.”
“I’m not. Marrok has been torturing him since he found the man after taking me out,” I state, unsure how I am so sure of the fact. “My father is just too stubborn to die. This is mercy. Mercy I don’t believe he deserves but a mercy none the less.”
“Yes Ursus.”
Taking the box from Konnor. “Help him this meet me back at the Ursidae.”
“Yes, Tala.”
Exiting the house, I sit in my car. Searching my connections I find the Marrok before opening myself up completely to the leader. “What else have you lied about, Sir?”
Guess who has the urge to write...but no idea what to write.
Your comments mean something even when the author never replies.
Sometimes your comments mean something especially when the author never replies.
exactly this
AlphaSmut Masterlist
B – Bite – Pete Dunne
C – Car – Ridge Holland
F – Friends - Sheamus
H – Heal – Pete Dunne
J – Jealous – Dexter Lumis
K – Kitchen – Baron Corbin
L – Liquor – Bo Dallas
Q – Quiet – Dexter Lumis
R - Rain – Bo Dallas
S – Snow – Seth Rollins
AlphaSmuts - J - Jealous
One letter per one shot, all smut
Jealous – Jealousy brings out the best.
Ft: Dexter Lumis
“Moving to the next round of the Women’s Tag Team Title Tournament, the team of Nikki Cross and Vera Tomb. Nikki’s arms wrap around my waist and I pat the smaller woman’s back before turning towards the entrance way to the rest of the Wyatt’s. Though not an official member, the group tolerates me in hopes of bringing more gold. “Well most just tolerate me,” I smirk, staring at the dreaded blonde stripping the vest from his torso. Three months of dating play behind my eyes as he and Joe approach the ring. Nikki shuffles past the two and up the ramp to sit at her leader’s feet. Joe and Dexter seating themselves on the middle rope, staring at me. Moving slowly, I slip between the men and onto the ring apron. Dexter takes my hand gently, bringing it to his lips before moving into the ring. A soft smile pulls at my lips before dropping as I head up the ramp. Nikki already seated at her leader’s feet. I nod at the tall man behind the rocking chair before staring at the man seated. “Howdy,” I nod.
“Vera, my dear, stay.”
“Thank you for the offer but a shower is calling.”
I move to step past when he wraps a hand around my forearm.
“That wasn’t a request,” he smiles yanking me into his lap.
“What are you doing,” I growl, squirming.
“Our boy needs some motivation.”
“What do you mean?”
He glances up at the ring and my gaze follows his. Dexter stands on the opposite side of the ring, eyes on me. There is a fire behind the blue there.
“He’s gone a little soft don’t you think,” his hands slide up my thigh to grip tightly. “A little too gentle for our taste.”
“Speak for yourself.”
“Oh come on, Dear. You know you want to be manhandled every now and then.”
“And how do you know I’m not?”
“Because Dexter treats you like you are made of glass,” he growls against my ear, his grip tightening.
I swallow back the argument, mainly because the man is speaking the truth. Dexter treats me like I could break at any moment. Always gentle and careful. “Why does my love life concern you?”
“Because it’s not just your love life.”
“Excuse me,” I snap.
“Not like that my dear, although.”
“Bring that up to Dex and see how that goes.” I smirk, trying to hide the heat seeping up my face.
He chuckles softly as his grip tightens.
Dexter is out of the ring the second the bell rings. Dragging me from Howdy’s lap and up the ramp without waiting on the rest of his group.
“Slow down,” I grumble as I stumble trying to keep up with his long strides.
“No,” he growls. “Open it.” He motions to the locker room door as he drags me in front of himself.
“What do I get if I do?”
“A conversation.”
“Not really in the mood for talking,” I smile backing up against the door.
“Too bad,” he grumbles. “Open the damn door.”
“Or what?”
“Not in the mood Vera.”
Opening the door without looking, I walk backwards into the room. “What do you want to talk about?”
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why did you allow that out there?”
“The man is twice my size.”
“And I’ve personally been on the receiving end of your ass beating during the sparring sessions so that’s a bullshit answer.”
“It is the answer you’re getting.”
He lets out a groan of frustration. “Vera.”
“Do you not trust your leader?”
“That is not the point.”
“What is the point?”
“You were letting him manhandle you.”
“Are you jealous? That someone actually treated me like a fucking human being and not this fragile thing that could break at any moment. You said so yourself, I kick your ass in sparring sessions. I am tough enough to spar with but not tough enough to handle you anywhere else. I’m not some fucking piece of glass, Dex. Maybe you should stop acting like it.”
“Everyone decent,” Erick calls.
“Yes,” I call back. “I’m going to shower. Meet you at the car once you cool down.”
Bo smirks at me as we pass in the doorway.
The ride back to the hotel is silent as Dexter sits stiffy, his eyes glaring at Bo sitting on my other side. Bo’s hand rest casually on my knee, his thumb alternating between stroking my lower thigh and tapping random rhythms on the side of my knee. Both seems to wind my boyfriend’s nerves even tighter. The quiet continues on the trip up to our room, the only words spoken are those of goodnight to the other’s in the group before I enter. The man grabbing my waistband to spin me as I make it halfway to the bed. It’s not a kiss that follows…it’s a devouring. His hands are on my hips shoving me backwards against the dresser. His thigh wedging between mine. His mouth crashes into mine with teeth and spit and tongue, and the growl that rips from his throat as I grind against his thigh makes my toes curl. His hand snakes under my skirt to rip my panties from my body. “I am going to ruin you,” he growls against my ear. “You’re never gonna look at another man.”
“Promise,” I smirk.
He tears his shirt off like it’s suffocating him, his belt ripping from the loops, before shoving his pants down just enough to free his cock…thick, flushed, already leaking. I don’t even get a warning. He drives up into me with a snarl, burying himself so deep. There is nothing gentle or sweet. It’s desperate and raw, my hips digging into the dresser as he sets a brutal pace. The slap of skin echoes off the walls. I moan like a woman possessed.
“Oh, now you remember who you belong to,” he growls, slamming into me causing my eyes to roll.
“More…don’t stop…”
He doesn’t. If anything, he goes harder. The furniture behind me slamming against the wall with every thrust. My body would be bouncing beneath his like a ragdoll if his grip wasn’t holding me so tightly. And I love it, crave it.
“Fuck, you feel good,” he growls. “Been holdin’ back too long. Didn’t know you wanted this.”
I drag his mouth back up, biting his lip. “I want everything.”
The sound he makes…God, it’s not human. He ruts into me like a beast, hips pistoning with feral, single-minded hunger. One hand releasing to slide down my side, across my stomach, between my legs…and then he’s rubbing my clit in rough, perfect circles while he fucks me like an animal. My orgasm barrels through me without warning…sharp, electric, endless. I throw my head back and scream, nails digging into his back, muscles clenching around his cock like a vice. But he doesn’t stop. Doesn’t even slow down.
“You said I could ruin you,” he rasps. “So take it.”
My second orgasm builds right on the heels of the first. Leaving me dizzy, gasping, nails raking down his arms…but I nod. I wanted this. I wanted him like this.
“Gonna fill you up,” he grits, voice ragged. “Gonna come so deep you’ll feel me for days.” He slams in hard, stays buried to the base, and comes with a noise that makes me go liquid in his hands. His body shudders, and I feel the flood of heat, the pulsing, the tremor of relief and release. But he doesn’t pull out. His forehead drops to mine, breathing still wild as he searches my face like he’s looking for damage. A smile cracks his face. “I’m not fuckin’ done with you Vera, baby.”
“Good,” I smirk. “Now fuck me on the bed. The neighbors already hate us.”
“You’re not giving the orders here.”
My back hits the mattress.
“But you’re listening,” I grin.
I lay sprawled across him in the predawn hours, sweat coated and completely spent. Dexter’s fingers trace my spine in a slow sweeping path.
“You know I don’t want Bo, right?”
“I know,” he states sleepily.
“I may use him again to rile up your jealousy if this is the outcome.”
One hand comes to cup my jaw, tilting my face to meet his eyes. “How about you use your words and not my friends to get what you want from now on?”
“Bo didn’t seem to mind.”
“But I did.”
“I love only you, Dex,” I smile. “I only want to be with you. You promise to be the same for me then I can leave your friends alone.”
“Promise,” he grins, pressing a soft kiss to my lips.
“Don’t go back soft on me yet,” I grin.
“You’re insatiable,” he smirks, rolling me underneath himself.
“And you’re smitten with me.”
Friendly reminder 🫶
non-writers will never understand the mental illness of writing an entire conversation in your head while doing dishes and then forgetting every word the second you open a blank doc
nice
August 23, for anyone queuing for next year...
"If you use em dash in your works, it makes them look AI generated. No real human uses em dash."
Imaging thinking actual human writers are Not Real because they use... professional writing in their works.
Imagine thinking millions of people who have been using em dash way before AI becomes a thing are all robots.
REBLOG IF YOU'RE A HUMAN AND YOU USE EM DASH
AlphaSmuts: Quiet
One letter per one shot, all smut
Quiet – They cannot make a sound.
Ft: Dexter Lumis
“Dare,” I state, downing the shot in front of me.
“Alright Iris, I dare you to give,” Candice starts, looking around the bar before smirking. “Dexter Lumis a lap dance.”
“Scary blue steel,” I smirk, downing the whiskey placed in front of me.
“Whatever you want to call him.”
“Bet,” I smile, sauntering towards the old jukebox in corner feet from said man. I lean against the machine, my hips swaying to the current song as I look through the selection of songs for my performance. My mind wanders as I skim through the music choices, I don’t even notice that my dancing had became more involved with time. Arms caging me brings my mind back to the present, a solid body pressing into my back. Glancing over my shoulder, I’m met by crystalline blue. “Hey Dexie,” I grin slowly.
There is no change in his expression.
“Do you need the jukebox?”
He shakes his head.
“Do you need something else?” I arch slightly, my ass brushing across his groin.
His lips twerk as he nods.
“What do you need?
His hands slide down the glass in front of us and grips my hips. Pressing me firmly back against himself. I hum at the feel of him.
He uses his grip on me to spin me to face him, my hands landing on his chest. Without a word he hoists me, draping me over his shoulder effortlessly.
“Wait,” I giggle. “I didn’t get to dance for you.”
Darkness swallows us moments later and I’m set on my feet.
“You’re gonna make me lose the….”
Dexter doesn’t let me finish. his mouth crashes into mine. He swallows the rest of the protest in a kiss that’s anything but patient. his lips are warm, and he kisses like he’s been waiting forever. Like he’s memorized exactly how to make me melt and he was planning to use every one of them against me. I whimper, fingers curling around his belt, and he hums against my mouth as my back meets a wall. His fingers trail up my side, teasing, mapping every curve like he’s memorizing sacred territory. I shiver slightly, biting my lip as his mouth travels along my jaw. His touch feather-light and at odds with the hulking man in front of me. His mouth finds my neck, and his lips are hesitant at first then tasting your skin. He moves slowly, like he’s savoring a delicious meal. His mouth finally leaves me to watch his fingers drag slowly up my thighs. I try to suppress another shiver as his too blue eyes come up to meet mine in the dim light. “See something you like?”
He doesn’t answer, just sliding his hand around to slide the zipper on my skirt downwards.
“What…”
His free hand comes up to press a finger to my lips. The hand from my skirt slide up to my shirt, undoing the buttons one by one ever so slowly. I try not to squirm under his intense gaze but refuse to break it. He finally slides the loosened shirt from my shoulders as his lips drive back in for my neck. His mouth is hot as it trails lower, pressing open-mouth and wet kisses along the slope of my breast then his tongue drags a teasing stripe up my cleavage. I whimper, fingers twisting onto his hair and I feel him smile against your skin. Suddenly his lips close over my nipple through the lace, sucking gently. The fabric a barrier between his mouth and your nipple, and he’s sucking just enough to make me whine, but not enough to fully satisfy. It’s exquisite torture. All the while, his eyes stay glued to my face, watching every wave of pleasure that hits.
“Dex,” I whimper.
His mouth comes down hard on mine, and I melt into his chest as one knee wedges between my thighs. His hands trail down my back, before they rest on my ass as he moves me back and forth along his thigh.
“Fuck,” I pant as his mouth moves along my jaw, starting the whole process over again. “More.” My hands drop to struggle with his belt. “Please,” I whine as one hand comes down to still mine. His mouth engulfs mine again and I whimper.
Pulling my hand up, he places it on his chest over his pounding heart. “Be a good girl,” he whispers against me. “And be quiet.”
I nod against him as his fingers start their slow ascent up my thighs again. He growls into me as he reaches the apex and finds no resistance. He pulls back to stare into my eyes and I shrug, pressing my lips together tightly as one finger slides through my folds. His mouth returning to me as he switches to his thumb, circling my sensitive bud slowly. My breathing becomes ragged as I try to stay silent. Two fingers breaching me and curling. A whimper breaks free of my control. His free hand comes around to smack my ass causing me to gasp.
His blue eyes meet mine as he repeats the action, the coil in my stomach tightens with each stroke.
“Please,” I beg with my eyes.
His lips quirk as he brings his hand from my ass to work the button of his jeans. My hands join his helping work the button and zipper loose. His head falls as my hand snakes into his boxers, wrapping around him. I take the opportunity to nip at his throat and he leans forward bracing against the wall behind me as I finally free him. My hand strokes along him. He growls low in his throat, the pressure against my clit increases his fingers speed up.
“Fuck,” I groan against his throat, my hand speeding up.
Suddenly his hand is gone from me, he watches me for a few more seconds licking his fingers lewdly. Slowly he presses in on me, his hands trailing down to slide my skirt upwards bunching it around my hips. Gripping my thighs, he hoists me pressing me tighter against the wall. My nails dig into his shoulders as he sheaths himself pulling a soft hiss from him. He stills as our hips meet. I grind my hips down, needing the friction.
The slap across my ass has me swallowing a moan He snaps his hips up harshly before setting a quick but calculated pace. I lean forward capturing his mouth pulling his bottom lip between my teeth causing his hips buck sharply taking my breath away.
My grip tightening around him as I concentrate on the feel of the man beneath my hands and not what he’s doing to my body. I feel like a guitar string overtightened.
He groans as my thighs tighten around his waist, burying his face into my cleavage. He mouth sucking a mark.
My eyes roll up as the new position has his pelvic ridge rubbing against my over sensitive clit. All thoughts leaving me as I throb around him.
“Good girl,” he chuckles against my ear as he fucks me through the aftershocks. “Not a sound.”
“Come for me Dex,” I whimper. “Please.”
“Dexter,” Johnny calls from somewhere outside the door. “Dexter?”
The man in front of me groans.
“No, no, no, no,” I whimper as he pulls out.
“He’s not going to leave until I show my face,” he mutters, tucking himself back into his jeans. “We’ll finish this back at the hotel, Baby.”
“Promise?”
He smirks pressing one last slow languid kiss that leaves us both breathless. “And Mrs. Lumis, the next time you go out, wear your ring and some damn underwear.”
“I make no promises,” I smirk as he disappears.
Fake It Til You Make It Pt 4
I sit straight up, a vice tightening around my chest. I gasp clawing at the pain in my side, tears streaming down my face.
“Birdie? Raven.” Dexter appears in front of me. “Another nightmare?”
I shake my head, ducking my head. “At least not that I remember,” I gasp.
“What happened.”
“Don’t know. Just…” I gasp. “Just can’t…panic attack.”
“Look at me, Birdie. Right here. Good girl.”
“We talked about the good girl talk,” I wheeze.
“Don’t like it,” he grins.
I shake my head at him, rolling my eyes.
“Just keep breathing,” he grins, moving to stand.
“Don’t,” I gasp, grabbing at his hands.
“Okay. I just thought I used up my physical contact budget last night.” His hands wrap around mine.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
“Stop thanking me.”
“You think I don’t appreciate you.”
“No. I think it’s unnecessary.”
“And why is that?”
“Because…”
Nikki’s giggles cut through the room, Joe close behind her.
“Sorry,” Joe states. “I thought you were still in the gym Dex.”
“And Birdie?”
“Birdie, needs a shower,” I answer before the other man can. “I need the hot water to relax my muscles after the panic attack,” I whisper.
One hand comes up rub across my lower ribs before dropping back to my hand. “Whatever you need.”
“Feeling better?”
“Not really,” I mutter. “Tonight is going to suck.”
“Maybe you won’t have to wrestle.”
“That may be worse than actually wrestling. Means there is nothing for me anymore.” Charlotte’s words drift through my mind. “I never actually made a plan for after wrestling.”
“You’re good at it. Why should you?”
“Because female wrestlers have a shelf life. Once we’re no longer consider pretty we are shipped off. I refuse to go under the knife to stay…There have already been comments on my appearance and my age,” I shrug. “Probably not much longer now
“You are gorgeous,” he whispers against my ear. “And strong.”
“Doesn’t change that I’m on my way out.”
“Trainer.”
“Don’t have the structure.”
“But you do have the skills.” Wrapping a hand around mine slowly. “Think about it.”
An arm wraps around my ribs as I come through the curtain. I spin out of the grip, facing Joe. My arms band around my sore ribs loosely.
“Hey,” he holds up his hands. “Just wanted to congratulate you on the match.”
“Yeah. Thanks,” I pant, fighting against the tightness in my chest.
Nikki’s brow creases. “Raven?”
“I gotta…I gotta go. Catch you guys afterwards.”
“Raven?”
“Later.”
Rushing down the hall, stopping short at the sight of my father.
“Raven Ann,” Taker states.
“Nope. Not doing this either,” I state, turning on my heel. “I’ll take the handsy one.”
“Raven, he didn’t mean…” Nikki starts.
“Don’t care,” I choke.
“Dex? Dexter!”
Blue eyes float in front of me. “Raven, breathe.”
“I’m so…sorr…sorry. I can’t…stop…this…one.”
“You don’t have to explain, Birdie. Just breathe.”
“But…”
He shushes me. “It doesn't matter right now. Just breathe for me.”
“Raven Ann,” Taker growls.
“Leave her be right now,” Dexter shoots back.
“I wasn’t talking to you.”
“But I am talking to you. Nik, take Birdie to the locker room. She needs a hot shower.
“Raven?”
I turn to follow Nikki.
“He didn’t mean anything,” Nikki whispers, guiding me through the locker room.
“I know.”
“Someone hurt you didn’t they?”
I nod.
“That’s not going to happen as long as we’re around. Dexter in particular won’t let that happen.”
I nod again.
“He said something about a shower.”
“Helps relax the muscles.”
She disappears into the adjoining room.
“Birdie, get in the shower.”
“I will. Just…Just give me some time.”
“Your lips are turning blue from lack of oxygen. You don’t have some time and I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for?”
He scoops me up and carries me to the shower.
“Stop. Dex you’re going to get wet.”
“Don’t care.”
“You have to wrestle in like twenty minutes.”
“Then I have fifteen minutes.”
“You’re going to fuck up all that make up you wear.”
“Fuck,” he growls.
“Do you want to shower with me Mr. Lumis,” I smile weakly.
His lips quirk. “I’ll have Nikki grab your stuff from the locker room. Stay here. Feel better.”
“You’re too good to me Buzzard.”
“Us birds gotta stick together.”
I sink to the floor of the shower as he leaves, my arms wrapping around myself. Leaning back I let the hot water rush over my face before leaning forward. The heat envelops my torso and I concentrate on relaxing my muscles under the spray. My bag appears outside the curtain.
“This is stupid,” I think. “You’re panicking over the stupidest things now. You wrestle a full ass match but the slightest touch sends you into attack? Fuck.” I groan softly as the muscles tighten. “Stop it Raven. Just breathe. Don’t think. Just breathe. Now I sound like Dexter.”
The image of Dexter’s concerned eyes float through my mind. The feel of his arms around me as I cry. His steady breathing beside me in bed when I wake in the middle of the night. “Why am I still so fucked up? Why do I let that man still destroy me? Why, when there are caring people all around me?” Shaking myself, I work the major pains from my back and ribcage before standing. Stripping my wet ring gear, I wrap a fluffy towel around myself before stepping out.
“Hey,” I smile up from my spot on a bench.
“Hey,” Dexter grunts, heading for the shower room.
“What…”
“Bad match,” Joe states.
“One bad match and that’s how he acts?”
“Said his head wasn’t in it,” his partner shrugs.
“Fuck,” I groan, sitting up to follow.
I find Dexter leaned against the counter by the sinks.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“Don’t be. My head wasn’t in the game,” he sighs.
“Because I let my shit get the better of me.” Pulling makeup remover from my bag I pull myself up onto the counter beside him. “Make you a deal,” I start, taking his face in one hand as I start to remove the dark makeup. “You keep being patient with me and I’ll limit my mental break downs to non-working hours. And work on my intimacy issues.” Leaning forward, I press my lips to his. He takes a slight step forward before taking a full step back.
“When you can open up then we’ll worry about the more physical aspects of your issues,” he states.
Biting my lip, I nod ignoring my racing heart. “Come here so I can finish then.”
He steps forward again but stays just within arm’s length of me. “Don’t let my shit affect your matches again,” I state. “You do and I’ll end this. Keeping Taker off my ass is not worth ruining your career.”
The corner of his mouth quirks, “Yes ma’am.”
“It was my fath…ex father-in-law,” I state as I finish up. “He’s the one that started all this. Got me in my head. He was the one calling last night. He’s the one that hurt me.”
Slowly, he cups my cheek. “Good start,” he states.
"You're on my side of the bed," Dexter mutters patting my leg making me jump..
"Last night you wanted the right side of the bed," I grumble looking up from the paperback in my hands.
"Last night the room was opposite."
"What?"
"The beds were on the opposite wall so my preference was the opposite side."
"I'm starting to think your preference is whatever side I settle on first," I smirk.
“I want the side closest to the door.”
“How gentlemanly.”
"Slide your ass over."
"Why don't you make me," I challenge.
Suddenly his hands are on my side and hip, shoving me gently. "Well my big mouth just got me friction burn on my ass," I chuckle straightening my sleep shorts.
"You should have known better than to say something like that to him," Joe mumbles flopping face first on the second bed next to Nikki.
I shrug in response settling on my side facing the man. "If I can't then who can?"
"My girl has a point," Dexter chuckles sliding into bed.
Joe mumbles something incoherent.
"He's just upset that you out-thought him on the subject," Dexter chuckles.
"I'm not the one who is afraid to touch my own girl," Joe mutters into the comforter.
I feel the man stiffen behind me.
“When you can open up then we’ll worry about the more physical aspects,” Dexter’s voice from earlier floats through my mind.
"I was attacked years ago. It was someone I knew and trusted. It went on for years. Since then I don't like to be touched unexpectedly. Dex respects that fact and tries not to startle me. It's something I wish others would also make an effort to do," I state glaring at the man.
Nikki elbows the man beside her.
“At least until I get used to you."
He raises his head to stare at me. "I'm sorry Raven. We didn't know."
"I know. Very few people do. I'm sure you will get the full story out of me but for right now that's all there is to the story."
"Sure thing. Goodnight."
Dexter slides an arm beneath my pillow slowly, his arm pressing along the top of mine. It's a position he's taken this week until the others fall asleep. Always a careful distance away to avoid actually touching me beyond my arm. Impulsively I stretch my fingers out to slide between his. He stiffens again before tightening his fingers around mine.
"Birdie?"
"Goodnight Dex," I sigh draping his other arm across my waist.
"Birdie," he breathes against my ear. "You don't have to convince anyone in here."
"Gotta start somewhere," I whisper turning my head to look at him. "I feel safe here. Besides, like I said it's been years, it's time I get over it."
"You don't-"
"I have to do it for me. For me,” I emphasis as his hand tightens around mine again. “That man has taken up too much space in my brain and he isn't worth it."
"Okay," he sighs raising his arm from my waist to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear before allowing it to slide down to my shoulder and then down the arm holding the book to take it from me. Setting it on the bedside table before reaching out to turn off the light. His hand returns to drag his fingers lightly up and down my forearm. “Goodnight Birdie.”
“Night Dex. Night Nik. Night Joe.”
“Night,” Joe grunts, rolling to face Nikki.
I lay watching Dexter’s fingers travel slowly over my skin until the rhythm slowly lulls me to sleep.
I showed them to my mom once and she pointed at the kitten and said “petty theft” and pointed to the big cat and said “grand larceny”
Fake It Til You Make It Pt 3
“Raven, why are you still in bed,” Dexter’s voice floats from somewhere in the room.
“Sleeping.”
“I see that. Why are you still sleeping?”
“Tired.”
“I have been to the gym and breakfast already this morning.”
“You want a cookie?”
“Maybe,” he chuckles. “Got one.”
“You don’t look like you’ve eaten a cookie in your life,” I mumble.
“Actually I have a sweet tooth.”
“Good to know, now shush.”
“Get up. We’re leaving after my shower. Birdie,” he sings. “Birdie. Birdie. Birdie.” Hands come down on my arms and I jerk upright, my skull connecting with something hard.
“Fuck,” Dexter groans.
“Don’t pin me, you fucking jerk,” I snap, shoving the man away before cradling my head. “Damn you have a hard head.”
“You’re one to talk,” he grumbles. “And it was my chin.”
“Still…” I groan. “Please stop pinning me.” I feel the panic coiling in my chest. “Please. Please.” I wrap my fingers through my hair to still some of the shaking in my hands.
“Hey. Hey, we’re okay. Raven. Raven, look at me. Birdie look at me. I’m not going to touch you while you’re like this. Please look at me Birdie.”
I meet his eyes and fight to hold his gaze.
“Breathe. You’re okay. Just breathe, Birdie. Just breathe. In. Out. In. That’s good.”
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. Forgive me.”
I nod untangling my hands from my hair.
“I’m going to get in the shower. Why don’t you get some breakfast and…I don’t know how to make this better. I really fucked up.”
“I’m fucked up,” I mutter.
“No, you’re not,” he sighs, his hand comes up and he stops himself. “Go get breakfast.”
“Okay,” I whisper, pulling myself from the bed.
I try to make myself as small as possible as I pile my plate with fruit and toast.
“Where is Dexter?”
“Probably still in the gym. Or in the room with Raven,” Nikki’s voice floats.
“Right. She doesn’t even come to bed until two in the morning but she’s up there…”
“Dexie cares for her. She makes him happy.”
“I don’t get how or why. He claims they’re together but he acts terrified to touch her.”
“Not everyone is touchy feelie, Love.”
“Dexter is.”
“But Raven…”
“If Raven is really with Dex then she…”
“Raven is really guarded, Joe. There is probably a reason for that. Did you eva think of that?”
“There is something that Dexter likes about her. I just haven’t seen it.”
“You don’t need to see it, Love. Just Dexie.”
Hearing enough, I push forward between them. “Excuse me. Just need a fork. I like this one by the way,” I motion to Nikki. “You…Don’t impress me much. Work on that. See you tonight Joey.” I stroll away to the sound of Nikki’s maniacal laughter.
“Joe doesn’t seem completely convinced of us,” I mumble as I hear the bathroom door open.
“Joe doesn’t matter.”
“You said he’s the key,” I glance up from my breakfast to find Dexter standing with a towel draped low on his hips. My mouth suddenly going dry. I watch a droplet slide from his throat downward following the curves of his pecs and abs before disappearing on the towel.
“Raven?”
“You said that Joe is the key to getting the rumors going. Wouldn’t he be key to keeping them going,” I rush before chugging my juice.
“He might be,” he smirks. “Looking a little red there, Raven. Is there something wrong?”
“You’re in just a towel,” I mutter, turning to study the view out the window.
“We had an entire conversation with you just in a towel. A towel that you proceeded to drop in front of me.”
“First, I had your shirt on over the towel when I dropped it. And secondly, there is a big difference between you and me.”
“Yeah, you’re…”
A pounding on the door interrupts him.
“Ten bucks says that’s my sperm donor.”
“Fuck,” he growls pulling jeans on under the towel. “I’ll deal with him.”
“Thank you Honey,” I chuckle.
The door slams as Dexter re-enters.
“Have a lovely conversation with the father-in-law?”
“How? How have you made it this….”
“Just as stubborn as he is plus some,” I smile. “Is that what Joe meant by passionate? You’re willing to punch someone at a moment’s notice because I can do that.”
“No.”
“Then what?”
“I’m very…affectionate in relationships. He just noticed how distant I hold myself with you.”
“So you’re not pulling your part in this. Other than punching guys.”
“You’re the one that told me not to touch you,” he leans against the counter beside me.
I close my eyes against the memory. “I’m sorry. It wasn’t you. The dre…The nightmare. It was of a really bad time of my life. I wasn’t talking to you.” I wrap my arms around myself.
“You also don’t seem to like much interactions. Physically. I’m not going to do anything outside of your comfort zone.”
“I’ve been in your arms more times than my ex-husband’s,” I smirk.
“Ex-husband?” his eyebrows meet his hairline. “You were married?”
“So were you,” I smirk. “Arranged marriage. No love involved…at first. It was our parents’ idea. We were married for about five years. Name only.”
“People still have arranged marriages?”
“In my case, it is a really unfortunate reality. One of the many reasons to hate Taker.”
“I’m sorry. If you want to back out of this…”
“No. And I’m not really that bad with physical contact.”
“Really?”
“Really. I am bad with physical intimacy.”
“Is there a reason.”
“I’m only slightly better with emotional intimacy,” I sigh.
His hand wraps around my wrist bringing my hand to his bare chest. “Raven, look at me.”
I meet his eyes.
“You feel that?”
I nod.
“As long as that heart beats, you’re safe around me.”
“Damn,” I smile. “That was a good line. How are you single?”
“Wasn’t a line. If I haven’t proven I won’t hurt you yet, I don’t know what I can do.”
I curl my fingers against his skin before stepping forward. “Don’t pin me. It brings up bad memories and makes me more reactive. Move slowly. Sometimes I startle easily. Especially after…after a day like yesterday.”
His hand cups my hip slowly, fingers splaying across my back. “Slow enough?”
“Good boy,” I smile before stepping back. “Now put on a shirt, you’re distracting.”
He chuckles as I exit the room
“Why did your arranged marriage end?”
“He wanted to marry his boyfriend,” I smirk. Glancing over I find him searching for words. “I told you it was in name only.”
“So you never…”
“No. He wanted to try but…I wasn’t his type. That combined with my…issues with his family. We decided to divorce. What happened with you and Indi?”
“Uhhh,” he grunts, grip tightening on the steering wheel. “Grew apart I guess.”
“You guess?”
“We threw ourselves into work and one day just realized we were on different paths. The divorce papers showed up the next day.” I watch the pain surface in his eyes before he buries it again.
“I’m sorry.”
He shrugs.
“Burying pain doesn’t make it go away.”
He glances over at me.
“It’s what my therapist always tells me. I rarely listen.”
“And why is that?”
“I’m a stubborn bitch.”
A grin splits his face.
“I won’t argue that point. I’ve met the root cause of that. You get it honest.”
“Thanks.”
“What about your mom?”
“Gone,” I grunt. “Before my fifteenth birthday. Lung cancer. Hit her hard and fast.”
“Sorry.”
I shrug in response. “I’ve dealt with that pain a long time ago.”
“And your dad?”
“Ongoing pain.”
“You said your dad made mistakes. What…”
“Me. I’m his biggest mistake. And no I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
“Okay,” he states, holding his hand between us palm up. I place mine palm down on his and his fingers curl slowly around it. “But I’m here when you’re ready.”
“Thanks.”
“Ready for some more bad news?”
“Why not,” I sigh. “Give it to me.”
“If…you want to stay with me for the rest of the week, I’m sharing rooms with the rest of the Sicks. Specifically Joe and Nikki.”
I inhale deeply, closing my eyes.
“You don’t have to…”
“I’ll do it. It will give me a chance to be…a little less fucked up. If…If that’s okay.”
“As long as you stop talking down about yourself.”
“Don’t have your little guard puppy around?”
“He’s around somewhere,” I mutter not looking up from my laptop. “Probably within yelling distance if I really needed him.”
“So that is who you broke the contract for?”
“No. But he is someone I’ve chosen after I broke the contract my father signed me up for. A contract that fucking involved children by the way. Children who grew up and became adults that could think for themselves. And the conclusion we mutually came to is that our parents are fucking idiots. Anything else I can clear up for you?”
“Do you know how much that breech of contract cost?”
“Yes, because I put every cent you spent back in your account. Did you ever stop to think why I breeched that contract?”
“Does it matter?”
“It does to me,” I snap. “It did to Dan. Not that it matters to the so called fathers in the equation. I’m done with this conversation. Be somewhere else and someone else’s pain in the ass.”
He opens his mouth to speak and I hold up a hand.
“Don’t. In fact, Dexter,” I call. “Sicks.”
The door beside me opens and Bo sticks his head out.
“Will you please ask Dex to come out here please? I’m tired of dealing with some…pains.”
Dexter appears immediately.
“I hate to ask but this,” I motion to the older man in front of me, “is exhausting and I have a meeting to get to.”
I pick up my ringing cell without even looking at the screen. “Hello.”
"Hello Raven," the voice on the other end smiles.
"With the utmost disrespect, go to hell Mr. Belleni," I sigh.
"Still holding a grudge, I see."
"Always."
"Why won't you leave the past where it belongs," he growls.
“Maybe because you have left too many scars to forgive. Goodbye.”
“Don’t you want to know about your husband?”
“Ex-husband. And I know that that Dan is fine and safe away from you. So I have no connection to you anymore. Lose my number.” Ending the call, I try to push down the anger. Pacing the short hallway, I push the anger and hurt deeper. The phone ringing in my hand has me tossing it.
“Problems Birdie,” Dexter asks holding up the phone.
“Brooding.”
“About?”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“You’re shaking,” he states, tossing the phone to the top of a nearby crate.
“I’ll be fine. I just gotta push some stuff down.”
His hands hover over my arms.
“Raven,” he sighs. “You don’t have to hide.”
“I…I…”
“Breathe,” he whispers, using his presence to lean me against the wall.
“I’m trying.”
“Can I?”
I nod.
His hands drop gently to my arms, sliding slowly up and down. “Close your eyes,” he instructs.
My eyes slide close, my fingers grip at the edge of his vest.
“Breathe in. Come on Birdie, breathe for me.”
I inhale deeply.
“Good girl,” he says lowly.
My stomach tightens at his words. “Don’t do that.”
“Okay, just keep breathing.”
I feel the tremors in my arms start to slow as I concentrate on the movements of the man’s hands. One disappears as my phone buzzes again.
“Who keeps calling?”
“Someone I really don’t want to talk to.”
“Call again and I will break you,” Dexter growls.
“Dexter,” I gasp, popping my eyes open to stare at the man in front of me with my phone to his ear. His free hand comes up to close my eyes again. I hear a clatter and his hand returns to my arm.
“All you need to worry about is breathing.”
“Sometimes with him it’s hard.”
“Why is that?”
“He hurt me,” I whimper.
His fingers tighten momentarily before resuming their previous activities. “I’m sorry.”
I nod and I feel tears pricking at my eyes.
“Don’t cry.”
“I’m trying not to.”
His presence looms closer. I wrap the cloth of his vest around my fingers.
“Then stop fighting it. Just feel it for a little bit.”
I lean forward burying my face against his chest, letting the tears flow.
His arms wrap around me loosely, his cheek dropping to the top my head.
I don’t know how long we stand like that before I get my emotions under control. “Thank you.”
“Any time,” he whispers.
“We’re up Dexter,” Bo calls from the end of the hall.
Dexter steps back reluctantly.
“Go,” I nod at the question in his eyes. “I’m fine. I’ll see you after the show.”
He nods glancing at the end of the hall before leaning forward to press a kiss to my forehead. “Just keep breathing for me.”
“Will do.”
“Who keeps letting Dallas drive,” I mumble climbing in the SUV beside Dexter.
“I can hear you,” Bo grins.
“It’s not your hearing that scares me,” I lean against Dexter’s shoulder as the rest settle in.
“I can leave you here.”
“Dex wouldn’t let that happen. Right Babe?”
“Right Birdie,” he grins, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.
I rest my cheek against his chest, wrapping my arms around his midsection as we pull out of the parking garage.
“You okay?”
“Getting there,” I sigh. “Wake me at the first stop.”
“Gotta sleep through Bo’s driving,” he whispers.
“Mmmhmmm,” I hum, inhaling deeply before relaxing deeper into him. “He makes me car sick.”
“Why don’t you just bite me, both of you,” Bo chuckles.
“No thanks. Not that kinky,” I mumble back.
Dexter’s chest shakes beneath me. His hand running up and down my arm.
Fake It Til You Make It Pt 2
I groan as my head throbs at the light invading through my lids.
“Drink too much,” a voice questions.
Shooting upright I turn towards the voice. Dexter lays on his side staring at me through half closed eyes.
“Shit, Dexter. Did we?”
“No,” he chuckles. “Not for lack of trying on your part.”
“Then why are you…?”
“Remember anything from last night?”
“Bar, dancing, a handsy guy, you rescued me as always,” I smirk. “You walked me back…”
“You asked me to stay,” he butts in.
The feel of his arm around my waist, the smell of paint as he laid me in bed, the feel of loneliness as he turns to leave.
“I vaguely remember that. You were a perfect gentleman too.”
“Thank…”
The end of his sentence is cut off as the door slams open.
“What the fuck,” I growl standing.
“Yes, Raven, what the fuck,” Undertaker growls. “Why the fuck is there a man in your bed?”
“It’s none of your damn business,” I snap. “What I do in my own damn room. Especially when I use my own damn money. Not your damn business.”
“I paid…”
“WWE pays me, and as much as you don’t want to believe it you are not the whole damn WWE.”
“Listen little girl…”
“I am not your little girl,” I snarl.
“Raven, what is…” Dexter starts.
“You don’t speak,” Undertaker growls.
“You don’t speak to my guests that way. You were not invited here, he was.”
“You’re making mistakes.”
“Not as many as you, Dad,” I sneer.
“Raven…”
“Get out. I do not want nor need you here or in my life period.”
“Will you listen to me for once in your life,” he growls advancing. Dexter slides from the bed to stand between us.
“The last time I listened to you I didn’t end up well so no I will not.”
“Taker, she said get out,” Dexter states calmly. “Just go.”
“You have no idea what is going on.”
“I know this is a family matter that you don’t want to discuss in front of me. She’s not awake and she’s hungover, she’s not in a position to deal with this right now.”
“Get rid of your little boyfriend and find me Raven.”
“Not going to happen,” Dexter responds, crossing his arms as he stands directly in front of the older man. “I don’t like how you’re talking to her in front of me. Maybe you shouldn’t be alone with her.”
“Are you going to stop me, Boy?”
“I’ll do whatever I need to keep Raven safe.”
“Get out of my room. Or I’ll just call security and have you removed.”
The older man glares down at the both of us.
“Fine. Have it your way,” I mutter, crawling across the bed to the room phone.
“This isn’t done, Raven Ann.”
“Never is,” I mutter seconds before the door slams. I collapse onto my back on the bed.
“Sooo. Undertaker’s daughter, huh?”
“Unfortunately,” I sigh, sitting up.
“Knew there was something special about you,” he chuckles.
“Yep. Only thing that makes me special,” I mumble, standing. “My sperm donor. Thanks for last night but I need to clean up. See you around I guess.” Disappearing into the bathroom, I take a deep breath before moving to start the shower, brushing stray tears away with the back of my hand.
“I’m sorry,” Dexter sighs startling from my miserable thoughts.
“Dexter,” I sigh. "You startled me. I assumed you had left." Tugging the towel higher, I'm amazed to find him standing in the exact spot I left him in.
“I didn’t mean to insinuate you’re not special other than your dad.”
“I’m use to it,” I mutter, looking through my bag. “No need to apologize.”
“Does he do that often? Barge into your room?”
“Whenever he feels like it,” I sigh. “He doesn’t really care about my thoughts on the subject.”
“What if I were to stop that for you.”
“What?” Finally turning to face the man.
“I’ve been thinking about a plan that could benefit the both of us.”
“What might that plan be?”
“Pretend to be my girlfriend.”
“You’re hilarious,” I smirk.
“I’m serious,” he states. “Nikki has been on me since the divorce with Indi to put myself back out there. You need someone to keep your dad out of your rooms. We can help each other out.”
“I’m wrong. You’re insane.”
“I saved your ass last night.”
“It’s not the first time,” I snort, tossing jeans onto the bed.
“It was just a suggestion.”
“It is crazy.”
He shrugs.
I think about the loneliness I have been feeling lately plus the aggravation of dealing with my father. “I’ve done crazier,” I smirk.
“Really,” his lips quirk.
“What would being your pretend girlfriend entail?”
“Couple things,” he shrugs. “In public at least. Stay in each other’s room and keep certain someone’s out.”
“Define couple things.”
“A kiss or two in public. If you’re comfortable with it.”
“Whatever I’m comfortable with?”
“Or you can just say no,” he smirks, grabbing his shirt from the floor.
“Or we can talk more about this when I’m not only wearing a towel,” I yank the shirt from his hands and over the towel. Making sure the shirt covers all the important things before allowing the towel to drop. “Couple thing,” I smile, motioning to the shirt. “And there is not even anyone around to see.”
A grin splits his face, “Yeah?”
“Yeah. Now get out so I can get dressed. I’m comfortable but not that comfortable around you.”
“Ok,” he grins. One question first. You got a ride today?”
“Got a rental.”
“Cancel it. We’re going to start this today. You’re riding with me.”
“Just you?”
“And the rest of the Sicks,” he admits.
“Oh, so you want to throw me in the deep end?”
“I dealt with your dad first thing.”
“Fine,” I sigh. “Out.”
“Will I ever get that shirt back?”
“Tonight,” I smile, moving to the door.
“My room?”
“Whatever,” I smirk. “Just get out. I’ll meet you downstairs in an hour.”
“Kiss me,” he whispers, turning to lean on the doorframe from the hallway.
I glance down the hallway to find Joe. “Into the deep end,” I sigh, leaning up to press a soft kiss to his lips.
“Thanks,” he sighs. “Joe’s the best way to get the rumors going.”
“Now, please, let me get ready for the day,” I smile.
“One hour,” he smiles. “Don’t be late.”
Pulling the jeans on, I tie the shirt up at my hip before moving to the bathroom.
A light knock sounds on the door.
“I said give me an hour.”
A louder knock.
“Fine,” I growl. Yanking the door open. “What do you n…Alexa? What are you doing here,” I smile.
“Raven,” she grins.
“Sorry,” I step back, letting her in.
“You disappeared last night.”
“Yeah. Guy got handsy.”
“So you ended up with Dexter Lumis?”
“How?”
“I was just in the hallway,” she explains.
“He saved me once again.”
“And you repaid him with sex this time?”
“No.”
“Right.”
“No sex.”
“I just saw him leave.”
“We talked, ok? No sex. Just talking until we fell asleep.”
“And the shirt?”
“Trying something new,” I smile.
“Has little Ms. Raven decided to settle down?”
“I’m trying something new,” I restate. “Now if you want to talk, help me do something with this hair. I have like thirty minutes before I need to be downstairs.
“Raven,” Bo smiles. “What are you doing here?”
“Umm…Dexter…”
The young man glances behind me.
“What about Dexter?”
“I invited her,” the man in question answers behind me.
“What he said.”
“And why is that?”
“Probably because he came out of her room this morning,” Joe snorts.
Bo’s eyebrows raise and he finally takes in my appearance. “So you’re the reason he came back to our suite shirtless.”
“Dexter spends most of his time shirtless. How do you know the difference?”
Bo studies me.
“If it’s an inconvenience, I can find my own way.”
“There’s plenty of room,” Dexter states, taking my bag.
“I didn’t say anything about room,” I state, holding onto the bag. “I said inconvenience.”
“You are not an inconvenience.”
“No. Dexter is right. You’re not an inconvenience and there is plenty of room,” Bo smirks as Dexter finally get the bag from me. “It’s fine. Don’t worry. Erick is driving today.”
“Is that a good thing?”
“It’s better than Bo driving,” Dexter smirks. “Get in. I have the bags.”
“So Raven,” Nikki whispers as we sit elbow to elbow in the third row of the SUV. “Ya stole our friend last night.”
“I did,” I smile. “I’m only slightly sorry.”
“You and Dexter?”
“Me and Dexter,” I grin over at her.
“After one night?”
I chew on my bottom lip, trying to decide my best option. I watch Dexter tense as the seconds tick by.
“No,” I smile, deciding the best to stick as close to the truth as possible. “He’s been my saving my ass for a few years now. Last night was…It just changed something. I usually hate being the damsel in distress thing but with him,” I shrug. “I feel less like the damsel and more of an equal that he wants to protect. He’s the only one I allow to protect me without protest because it’s not about control, just protection. I haven’t had that in a while. I think I’m going to try and enjoy it while it lasts,” I yawn. “We got a long drive ahead of us. I didn’t get much sleep last night. I think I’m going to take a small nap. Finish this later?”
She bounces a few times before crawling over the seat to settle on Joe’s lap, her legs stretching to rest her feet on Dexter’s lap. Leaning against the window, I allow my eyes to close. Warmth envelops me and open my eyes long enough to find Dexter’s jacket covering me. “Thanks,” I mutter.
“Don’t mention it, Birdie.”
“Raven. Raven. Raven,” a voice chuckles. “You are looking as beautiful as always.”
“Thank you, Mr. Belleni.”
“How many times do I have to tell you to call me Clark?”
“Sorry Mr. Belleni, but I can’t do that.”
“Why is that?”
“You’re my father-in-law, sir. It would be rude.”
“Is that all that you see me as?”
“Yes sir.”
“Pity. Because I see you as much more than a daughter,” he smiles, reaching for me. I stumble backwards. “Raven,” he sighs.
“Mr. Belleni, please.”
“You know we still need you to produce an heir.”
“We’ve been over this. Dan and I decided we don’t want kids.”
“We both know why my son can’t impregnate you.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Everyone knows that faggot…”
“Don’t talk about Dan like that.”
‘Why do you defend him? He will never treat you the way you need to be treated.”
“My husband treats me just fine.”
“Your husband is currently bent over for the pool boy,” he scoffs. “The contract with your father states that you will continue the Belleni family. We both know your so-called husband is not going to do the job. But there is still a Belleni male that can.”
“I never agreed to anything other than marrying your son.”
“Your father agreed. On the bed.”
“No.”
“That wasn’t a request,” he growls.
Hands wrap around my arms.
“Don’t touch me,” I snarl, my back hitting something solid.
“Raven,” a voice calls. “Wake up. Raven. Come one Birdie.”
“Don’t touch me,” I snarl again, lashing out.
A hand wraps around my fist, "Birdie!"
My eyes snap open to meet concerned blue. "Are you back with us?"
“Dexter?”
He leans back so I can focus on his entire face. "I'm going to let go of you. Please don't follow through with that punch."
"I'm sorry," I whisper pulling away from the man.
"Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," I snap.
"Okay.” He moves lower the seat to let me out.
I scramble over the backseat of the SUV stumbling slightly on shaky knees before making it to the small patch of grass. I gag as my stomach roils.
“My driving isn’t that bad,” Bo calls from the driver side of the SUV.
I wave him off.
A bottle of water floats in front of my face. "What's wrong," Dexter whispers in my ear.
"Nothing."
"Bullshit. You just swung on me and then ran out to dry heave in the grass."
"You startled me that's all. And I got carsick."
"And you're shaking," he continues as if I hadn't spoken. "What's wrong?"
"It was just a bad dream."
His hand slides up my back as he squats beside me. "There are tears in your eyes."
I turn to face him fully meeting his eyes squarely. "I promise, I'm fine. I was having a bad dream and you startled me awake that's all."
"Must have been one hell of a dream," he smiles wiping away a tear that escapes with his knuckle.
"Yeah," I sigh. "Go, your fans are waiting. We can talk about this later. I need to check the match listings for tonight."
“Sure thing, Birdie,” he sighs, leaning over to kiss my temple.
“Feeling better,” a voice behind me questions.
Turning, I find Joe. “Yeah.”
“Want to talk about it?”
“No offense but not with you. Just don’t know you that well.”
“No offense taken. Your boy toy is alone in the locker room.”
“Good to know.”
“Aren’t you going to join him?”
“We’re sharing a hotel room. I think we can handle a couple more hours apart.”
“You two aren’t acting very couplely.”
“And how is that?”
“You don’t act close.”
“Sorry. I’m a tough nut to crack and we are still a new couple.”
“And Dexter is very… passionate.”
“You think I can’t be passionate?”
“Fiery, yes. Passionate in the ring, absolutely. Interpersonally, not from what I’ve seen.”
“Then maybe you don’t really know me,” I whisper, leaning in.
“Birdie? Everything ok?” A hand slides across the small of my back.
“Fine. Just getting the run down from Joe here about how unpassionate I am. I’m done for the night, I’m going to take a Uber and head back to the hotel. See you there.”
“You haven’t eaten.”
“I don’t have an appetite tonight. Thanks for the concern Dex, it’s not needed. See you later.”
“What the hell did you say, Joe?”
Seconds later my back hits the hallway wall. My arms pinned above my head as a heavy body presses into me. “What did he say to you,” Dexter whispers against my ear.
“Let me go Dexter,” I growl, fighting back the panic rising up.
“What did he say?”
“Let go of my arms. Please.”
The grip on my arms disappears and my hands come down to rest on his shoulders.
“At least tell me you’re okay.”
“I’m fine. I’ll see you back at the hotel.”
“Okay,” he steps back.
“I’m…I’m sorry, Dex,” I mumble. Glancing around I see most of our coworkers watching us. Leaning up, I press a kiss to his lips.
“There you are.”
“Hey Dexter,” I sigh turning off the treadmill. “I’ve been here since I got back. Why?”
“It’s two in the morning for one. Why are you in the gym so late?”
“What do you usually do in the gym?”
“I don’t usually use the gym after I wrestled a twenty-five minute match. Is this because of Joe?”
“No. I didn’t particularly like what he had to say about my personality but he has a right to his opinion of me.”
“He doesn’t know you.”
“Neither do you,” I smirk. “And you are letting me sleep in your room. Despite me being a cold bitch.”
“Like you said, he doesn’t know you. Are you…better?”
I nod leaning back on the control panel of the treadmill.
“Ready to talk about it?”
“Not really.”
“You would rather exhaust yourself,” he states.
“The nightmares,” I sigh. “Always work myself to exhaustion when they come back. It helps me sleep through the night.”
“You’re not exactly sleeping.”
“Touche,” I grin.
“Does it keep them away?”
“No. But I can sleep through them.”
“Then I think it’s time you come to bed. We have an early day tomorrow.”
“I’m fine,” I mutter.
“I’m not going to make you. But I am going to ask again. Will you come to bed now? Please.”
My knee buckles slightly from exhaustion and I sit heavily onto the side of the machine.
“Is that your answer?”
“My brain wants to say I’m staying but my body says I’m done,” I smirk, glancing around the room checking I left the other equipment how I found it. “Let me wipe this down and I’ll head up.”
“Don’t take too long.”
Fake It Til You Make It Pt 1
“You’re not wearing that.”
“Seeing as I’m an adult, I’ll wear whatever the hell I want.”
“You represent the company.”
“Say what you really mean, Taker.”
He cocks his head at me.
“Say it.”
“Stop embarrassing yourself.”
“That’s not what you mean. Say it.”
“Raven.”
“Unless you want to say what you really mean, you can get out of my room.”
“What exactly do you want me to say?”
“I embarrass you. Which is just the pot calling the kettle black in my opinion.”
The large man glares down at me.
“The Undertaker glare doesn’t intimidate me. You’ve used it too much on me.”
He turns on his heel, marching towards the room door.
“Just what I thought,” I snort.
The door slamming behind him shakes the whole room.
Lowering myself to the bed, I release the breath I was holding unknowingly. “Fucking jerk,” I mutter. My phone pinging brings my attention downward.
“Happy Birthday Rave. Hope it’s a good one. Hope you’re getting all that you want out of your life.”
“Thanks Dan. Miss you.”
“Same.”
“Hey Birthday Girl,” Alexa smiles, sliding a drink into my hand.
“Lexi,” I grin, wrapping the smaller woman in a hug. “Thank you for inviting me out.”
“Yeah, yeah,” she waves me off. “Now drink that so we can get on the dance floor. I know how you need to be loosened up first.”
“Gonna take more than one weak ass drink,” I smirk, gulping the drink down.
“But it is a start,” she chuckles, taking the glass from my hand. “Now let’s go. You need to shake that ass so you can get your grumpy ass laid.”
“I am not grumpy,” I grin, allowing her to tow me out to the dance floor.
“Sure, you’re not,” she laughs over the music.
“So,” Charlotte grins, sipping her drink. “What exactly are we celebrating tonight? Your retirement? You’re way past your prime.”
“Aren’t you like four years younger than me,” I roll my eyes.
“Four more years of glory,” she smiles.
I glance at my friend and she shrugs. “Lex, love you but…”
“What do you have and mind, Char?”
“Let’s play a game.”
“Alright John Kramer.”
The woman looks at me blankly.
“Jigsaw?”
No change in expression.
I roll my eyes. “What kind of game, Clueless?”
“How about……Truth, Drink or Dare.”
“What is this? College?”
“If you think you’re too good…”
“Raven, just go with it. You’ll get some free drinks outta it.” Alexa leans to whisper. “We’re in.”
“Come on, Ms. Stick in the Mud,” Charlotte whines. “You have to pick dare at some point.”
“You are a literal child. And a spoiled brat at that,” I smirk, sipping the water on the table.
“I dare you to…spend fifteen minutes with them,” she points across the room. I follow her line of sight and settle on the group of people.
“The Wyatts?
“Yep,” she pops the p. “If you’re brave enough.”
My eyes settle on the dreaded blonde. The charcoal gray tee stretched tightly across his chest. I remember walking into that chest many times at the Performance Canter. The smell of paint and ink always clinging there.
“Raven, you don’t have…”
“Ok,” I state, standing.
“Raven,” Alexa starts.
“It’s fine, Lexi. They don’t scare me. Fifteen minutes and I’ll meet you on the dance floor. I’m kinda tired of that one.”
Picking my way across the bar, I keep my eyes on Dexter. The memories of those blue eyes sweeping over me as some guy mouths in the background. Relief and attraction filling me as his arm wraps around my waist. The man in question glancing up watch me approach.
“Hello guys,” I smile sliding into an empty chair at the table.
The group stares back at me silently.
“Listen, here’s the deal. You scare the ever living shit out of my table over there,” I motion vaguely. “They think it’s an incredibly huge risk for me to come over here. I on the other hand think you are not that scary. I know this won’t hurt a fly unless you piss him off,” I pat the man beside me’s arm.
Dexter glances at me from the corner of his eye.
“So I trust his judgement on the rest of you. Let me buy a round of drinks and win some pride for myself.”
“How do you know Dexter,” Bo asks, leaning back to eye his friend.
“Saved my ass at the Performance Center…a few times,” I smile. “I’m mouthy and some guys can’t handle it.”
“Really?”
“Really. My mouth gets me in trouble more times than I can count. So what are we drinking?”
Erick calls the waitress over.
“What are you doing,” Dexter whispers.
“So you can talk,” I smirk.
He turns to look at me fully. “What are you doing?”
“I told you. They think you’re terrifying. They dared me to come over here. You don’t scare me sooooo….Here I am. And I was serious about those drinks.”
“Maybe you should be scared,” someone whispers from my other side.
I lash out shoving the body beside me.
“Maybe you are scared,” Joe laughs from the floor.
“Maybe I don’t like people sneaking up on me. Don’t do that again.”
“Or what?”
“You don’t want to know. Now do you want that drink or not?”
“I like her,” Joe smiles.
“Get out of my face,” I grin.
“I really like her,” Joe pats my face. I feel Dexter tense behind me.
“Don’t do that again and I’ll let you keep your hand. Now go order your drink.”
“You don’t learn,” Dexter mumbles.
“You are not the first one to say that to me.”
“You’re lucky Joe is harmless. He just likes to annoy.”
“If I viewed him as a threat I wouldn’t be over here.”
“You don’t have a very good track record at recognizing threats.”
“Well you would know best.”
“Whose fault is that?”
“No one ever asked you to save me.”
“You think I’m the kind of man that would walk by someone being assaulted?”
“I don’t really know what kind of man you are. You never really talked before. Just swooped in saved my ass and left.”
“You know me enough to trust my judgement about the others.”
“Touche,” I chuckle. “But I have a good feeling about you.”
The corner of his mouth turns up as he turns to start a conversation with Erick and I turn my attention to the drink in my hand. At some point Nikki pulls a chair around to jabber at me. I nod at what I hope are appropriate times as my mind drifts. Occasionally Dexter’s hand drifts over to brush my arm pulling me back from going too deep into my mind.
“Excuse me, everyone but I need to steal my friend,” Alexa’s voice cuts through the jabbering and music. I look up to find the short blonde standing over me. “You’re late,” she smiles.
“Apparently I have been sitting here too long,” I grin. “Hope you guys have a good night. Nikki, uh, good talk.”
“Oh my God, Raven, you’ve been over there for twenty-five minutes,” Alexa whispers as we walk away.
“Eh, they mostly ignored me. Nikki was trying to talk to me but she talks so fast.”
“Dexter seemed very cozy with you. Rubbing your arm,” she grins.
“He brushed my arm occasionally,” I roll my eyes.
“And you allowed it. You don’t allow men to touch you. But he just gets to casually touch wherever he pleases,” she waggles her eyebrows at me.
“It was my arm. You act like he had his hand down my pants.”
“For you that was pretty damn close.”
“Shut up and dance, Pixie.”
“I’ll be right back,” Alexa shouts over the music. “I need water.”
I throw a thumbs up to my friend as I continue to move to the music. I close my eyes against a sudden wave of dizziness. “Maybe I need some water too,” I think. “Or to sit down.”
“Hey there, Pretty Lady. Let me help you.”
“I’m good. Thanks,” I mutter.
“Come on.”
“I said no.”
“I’m just trying to help you bitch.”
“I don’t need your help, bitch,” I shove the man. “And I never asked for it.”
“Listen, you ungrateful whore,” he snarls, grabbing my arm.
“Don’t fucking touch me.”
“Oh, I can do more than touch.”
“Yeah, no thanks.”
“Your mouth says no but that body….”
“Creep,” I scoff. “Stay the fuck away from me.”
“Say whatever you want,” his arms wrap around my waist, pulling me close. “But I think I’m going to take you home with me.”
“The lady said no.”
“The lady is with me freak.”
“She still said no. Now hands off.”
The hands disappear and I stumble back into a solid chest. Gentle hands move me to the side and Dexter steps in front of me. “Touch her again.”
“Always my savior,” I whisper to myself, stumbling away.
“Hey,” Dexter calls as I stumble down the hallway. “Raven, wait.”
“I just want to get somewhere to lay. Or sit.”
“Are you okay, Raven.”
“Yeah. Just overdid it tonight. Thanks for rescuing me once again.”
I stumble again and gentle hands grab my shoulders. “Sorry,” he mutters, hands disappearing.
“It’s fine. I’m just going back to my room. Won’t get in any more trouble. Promise.”
“I find that hard to believe,” he smirks.
“Because I’m such a trouble maker?”
“Because there are a lot of trouble makers around and you don’t back down from anyone.”
“Walk me to my room?”
“What?”
“If I’m such a danger to myself, walk me to my room.”
“Okay,” he grins.
“Someone has to keep me safe and you’re the only one willing to take the job. Why is that?”
“Uhhh…I don’t really know.”
“Oh,” I smirk, leaning against the wall beside the elevators. “You’re turning a little red. Are you blushing, Mr. Lumis?”
“No.”
“Pity. If you were I’d tell you how cute it is.”
“You’re drunk.”
“Not that drunk.”
“Yes. That drunk.”
“You don’t know.”
“Anyone with eyes would know,” he smirks as the elevator arrives. “Ladies first.”
“You just want to look at my ass.”
He doesn’t answer as he follows me, settling beside me.
“There’s that not a blush,” I grin. “So you did.”
“What if I did?”
“Mmm,” I hum turning to stand in front of him. “I would have to admit I’m kinda like watching you walk away too. And,” I lean up on my toes to press a kiss to his lips.
“Raven, you’re drunk. Don’t do this.”
“You’re sweet. And protective. And so damn cute. And kissable.” I press another kiss to his lips pulling myself closer. His arms wrap around my waist, his lips moving against mine. Suddenly he pulls away. “I can’t.”
“Sure you can.”
“Not with you like this,” he states. “Let’s get you to your room and we can revisit this when you’re thinking clearly. Now come on,” his arm wraps around my waist guiding me out of the elevator. “What room are you in?”
“Nine eighteen.”
“Alright.”
I bury my nose into the crook of his neck, the scent of paint and a slight musk clears my head slightly and I lean heavily against him.
“Hey, now. Almost there. Come on. Grab your key.”
I dig the plastic rectangle from the pocket holding it between us.
“Don’t give up on me now,” he chuckles.
“I’m just tired,” I mumble as I hear a lock click. “Can you…”
“I got you,” he mumbles.
My feet feel like lead as he guides me through the room. My back hits the mattress before I realize I’ve made it to the bed. Dexter’s hands swiftly working the high heels from my feet, massaging each one momentarily before disappearing. “Goodnight Raven. Find me in the morning if you feel the same.”
The feeling of loneliness overwhelms me.
“Or I can skip a step and you can stay here.”
“Raven.”
“Please just stay,” I whimper. “Everyone leaves me. I’m just tired of being alone all the time.”
He runs his hands over his head before nodding. “Move over you bed hog.”
“My bed,” I mutter, settling deeper into the bed. “I can take up as much as I want.”
“Not if you want me to stay.”
“Fine.”
Ex to See
“You really need to get over me, Kassidy.”
Turning from comparing the two jars of pasta sauce in my hand to find my ex. “What are you talking about exactly?”
“You’re in here daily. Stalking me and Jessie.”
“Are you serious,” I laugh. “It’s a grocery store. The closest one to my house. I do eat. I require food. The fact that you and your latest girlfriend work here is just an unfortunate fact,” I roll my eyes, turning back to the shelves.
“Right,” he snorts.
“Sorry to bruise your ego but I have moved on quite a few times in the years since you. Much like yourself. The only difference is I waited until I ended the relationship before I moved on.”
“Is that why every time I drive by your place, you’re home alone.”
“You’re the one who needs to get over our breakup it seems.”
“Keep telling yourself that.”
“Is there a problem here?”
“No sir.”
“Just a misunderstanding,” I smile, tossing a jar into my cart.
X
My phone dinging pulls me from my thoughts. I smile at the name, unlocking the device.
Miss you, the text reads.
I deserve a vacation Bo, I reply.
You do. But I can still miss you.
What about the two years you disappeared on me?
I was injured and let go.
You obviously have my number.
You have me there. How are doing?
Healing. It’s minor. I’ll be back soon.”
Gonna be in town next week.
Coming by?
Hoped to.
I’ll get your favorite beer.
Or we can go to your favorite bar.
Or both.
I like the way you think. LOL. See you Friday?”
I send a thumbs up emoji before setting the phone on the table, my mood suddenly lighter. I don’t know why the thought of Bo coming by makes me so giddy. We usually spent one night a month together talking over drinks before letting the man escort me back to my hotel room before he disappeared from the road. He had spent a night or two sleeping on his couch when we were in town and I had even shared his bed the one night I stayed in his hometown. When he returned to the road a few months ago we restarted our routine.
“Until I almost broke my damn neck,” I sigh to no one. The doctor stated if it was a centimeter in a different direction and it would have been disastrous. “No one needs to know that part though. It didn’t happen so it’s not worth thinking about.”
X
I glance at the road as I pull grocery bags from the back of my SUV. “You watching for him is not going to make him show up faster, Kass.” Shaking my head, I carry the bags into the kitchen, depositing them onto the table before returning to the SUV.
“Kassidy.”
“How did I not hear that shitty truck pulling up,” I mutter before turning to my ex. “What do you want?”
“To give you what you want,” he grins.
“If that were true, you would disappear from my life.”
“You know we were good.”
“I was great. You were meh but I kept you around because I foolishly thought I was in love.”
“Come on Kassie.”
“Don’t call me Kassie,” I grumble. “And what’s wrong? Did your latest thing find out about your true nature? You can go home and give your hand a STD because you’re not getting anywhere need me,” I turn back to my vehicle.
“Kass…”
“Get off my property.”
“She said leave,” Bo’s voice growls from the rear of the house.
“Apparently I am just oblivious to everyone on my property,” I think.
“Who the hell are you?”
“The only one here that was invited,” I answer as a hand grips my hip. “Hey Bo. Why did you come through the back?”
“Hey Kass. Shitty truck blocking the front driveway. Need help?”
“Not with this,” I smile, turning to awkwardly hug my friend despite my hands being full of beer. “That,” I chin jerk, “maybe.”
“Who is that,” he smiles, though it doesn’t reach his eyes that bore into the other man.
“Remember the bad mood I had the night we met? Meet the bad mood.”
“I’ll take care of it. Get those into the fridge.”
Bo’s mood is sour when he joins me in the house.
“He has that effect on people,” I mutter, leaning against the counter.
“What…What did you…”
“Young and dumb is the only excuse I can say.”
“I don’t believe you were ever that dumb,” a smile tugs at his lips.
“Complete idiot,” I smirk. “So what are you feeling tonight? Beer and Netflix on the couch? Going out to the bar?”
“Hmmm,” he hums. “I think I need to take you out.”
“You do, do you? And what brings you to that conclusion?”
“You haven’t been out of this house since you got hurt.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I know you.”
“I hate it when I can’t argue with you,” I scrunch my nose at him.
“Go get ready,” he mimics me.
“Bossy,” I smirk, moving around him.
“Wear something cute. Not the usual when we go out.”
“Definitely bossy tonight.”
X
“Does this meet your qualifications,” I start, exiting my bedroom stopping mid-step at the sight in my living room.
Bo stands shirtless winding his long air into a tight bun, the muscles in his back flexing with each movement. My eyes roam his skin hungrily. The thought of staying home and doing other things with my friend. “Fuck I need to get laid or I’m going to do something stupid again.” Shaking the thoughts from my head as he turns to face me, his eyes widening. “Bo? Too much,” I ask, twirling and allowing the skirt of my halter dress to billow slightly.
Clearing his throat, “No. You look beautiful.”
“Thank you,” I smile as he pulls his shirt on. “Not too bad yourself.”
“Thanks,” he smirks working the buttons of his shirt quickly. “I try. Let’s go. We’re taking your car. I’m driving.”
“Very specific.”
“If the asshole wants stalk you and your place then he’s going to see my car not yours tonight.”
“Who says he’s stalking me?”
“He did.”
“What?”
“He says he knew I was a new lay. Because he drives by your place daily.
“And the bastard had the nerve to accuse me of stalking,” I mutter. “Good thing I change the locks after our breakup.”
“I knew you were smart.”
“What happened…other than the obvious of being an asshole?”
“He asked for some space to figure some stuff out. So I gave it to him,” I shrug. “We checked in weekly with each other but otherwise I gave him the space. Found out he was sleeping around…in my house.”
“Fuck,” he growls, hands tightening around the steering wheel.
“Did you just curse, Mr. Dallas?”
“Yes, I fucking did.”
“Alrighty then,” I chuckle. “I kicked him out. Changed the locks. Basically erased him from my life. He pops up from time to time to annoy me. I guess you’re the first of my ‘lays’ to confront him,” I smirk, patting his hand on the gear shift.
X
“Do you trust me,” Bo whispers against my ear as I stand waiting for the bartender.
“You know I do,” I turn to look over my shoulder at him. “What’s up?”
“Asshole walked in,” he states, fingers tracing along my spine. His dark eyes watching me for any reaction. “Want to give him a show?”
“What do you have in mind?”
He chuckles, nuzzling against the back of my neck as the bartender pulls my attention forward again.
“He wants to think we’re together, let him see how happy you are without him.”
“And how do we do that,” I ask, as he reaches around me to take our drinks.
“Trust me,” he winks, downing his drink before taking my hand.
I repeat his action with my own drink before allowing him to pull me through the bar to the small dance floor in front of the live band. His arms wrap around my waist as the band starts a slow ballad. I drape my arms over his shoulders, my fingers playing with the ends of his hair coming loose from his bun as we sway. He hums pulling me closer and I change my stance, wrapping my arms under his and snuggling against his chest.
“Nice cologne,” I mutter absently.
“Thanks,” he chuckles, his fingers dance up and down my spine as he holds me tight.
“How do you know I love my back rubbed like that?”
“I pay attention. How do you know I like my hair played with?”
“I always play with your hair,” I smirk, peeking up at him. “I don’t even think about it.”
I feel him hum rather than hear him.
“You do, you know,” I smile after three songs on the dance floor.
“I do what,” he grins, helping me onto a barstool before seating himself beside me. Caging my legs between his as he pulls me closer to him.”
“You said to show him how happy I am. You make me happy.”
A smirk tugs at his lips but the happiness doesn’t quite make it to his eyes.
“I didn’t ask, is there a reason for this visit or just my general loveliness?”
“I can’t miss you?”
“You can. But there seems to be something on your mind on and off tonight.”
“I’m fine.”
“Didn’t say you weren’t,” I take a sip of my drink. “But you’re not fully yourself either.”
“Like?”
“You let asshole get under your skin tonight. You got mad in the car. I don’t think I have ever seen you like that in the years I’ve known you. A couple of times your smile hasn’t reached your eyes also. You don’t have to talk about it,” I state, squeezing his knee. “Just thought you might have came to talk.”
He stares at his drink, spinning the glass in his fingertips. “Just lonely,” he finally states softly.
“Know the feeling.”
“Figured we could be lonely together.”
“Never lonely with you around, Bo.”
He snorts.
“There’s that smile that doesn’t reach your eyes.”
“You are…You are where I don’t have to act. I can let everything down and just be.”
“I think that is a compliment.”
“It is.” This smile is genuine.
Reaching out, I release his hair from the bun. Finger combing the few tangles, I watch his eyes close. “You’re not alone, Bo.” Curling my fingers, I lightly scratch along his scalp, and Bo practically purrs, leaning back into my hand.
“Thank you,” he murmurs.
“Always,” I smile, carefully removing my hand from his hair. “Want me to put it back up. I’m sure it’s cooler for you. It’s so gorgeous down though.”
“It is not.”
“You know you have gorgeous hair,” I smirk, standing to move behind him.
“Leave it down,” he sighs, grabbing me around the waist. “Please.”
“It’s your hair. The only thing you have to ask me for is to leave it alone.”
“Don’t do that either,” he smiles, pulling me closer. “It’s still early, we could hit the dance floor again. Or I can take you home to curl up on the couch,” he sighs as my hands hesitantly rest on his chest.
I try to ignore the heat seeping in my body from his, as I fight against the urge to run my hands over his chest. “What the hell is wrong with me tonight? This is your friend, not some random guy to lust over. It’s fucking Bo, you want to fuck up your only true friendship?”
“Kass?”
Clearing my throat, I meet his eyes. “Sorry.”
“Do I wanna know where you just went?”
I shake my head, moving my hands to his shoulders to remove the temptation.
“Hey,” he sighs. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Yeah. I know, I’m being weird. Sorry I don’t know what’s going on with me right now.”
“You haven’t drank that much tonight,” he grins.
“Yeah,” I laugh, moving to play with the ends of his hair nervously. “Must be my natural weirdness.”
“Kassidy…”
“I’m fine, I promise.”
His dark eyes search my face.
“What are you feeling like,” I ask, returning to his original question.
“That wasn’t what I asked. I asked what you wanted.” His hands return to my back and I shiver.
“I don’t know what I want,” I answer truthfully.
“Now who’s not acting themselves,” he grins, his eyes darting over my shoulder before back to mine.
“Yeah,” I chuckle before gasping as he pulls me even closer.
“How much do you trust me?”
“What do you want to do?”
“Tell me to stop if you want me to,” he breathes leaning in.
“Stop wha…”
“Shhhhh,” he mumbles, nosing along mine. “Only word you need to say is stop.”
“Ok,” I breathe seconds before his lips ghost over mine.
He pulls back to glance into my eyes before diving back. The kiss has my knees weakening and my hands tightening around his shoulders.
When he pulls back a second time, I pull him back to me. “Don’t stop,” I breathe, leaning into him further. “Why didn’t you tell me you were such a good kisser?”
He shrugs and I’m suddenly aware of his hands at the exposed small of my back, rubbing light circles, warmth spreading downward.
“Want to head out of here?”
There is the sound of glass breaking behind me.
“Don’t look,” Bo whispers, pressing his forehead to mine, a smirk tugging at his lips. “It’s just the asshole.”
“Oh,” I breathe, reality hitting me square in the chest as I remember why he’s doing this. Clearing my throat, I meet his eyes. “Let’s head home.”
X
The ride back to my house is quiet as I stare out the window and try to shove the empty feeling that is sitting in the center of my chest painfully away.
“Kass?”
I blink away unneeded tears before turning to my friend.
“Did I…I’m so sorry Kass. I overstepped.”
“No. I told you not to stop.”
“I shouldn’t have started,” he sighs as we pull into the driveway.
“It’s fine,” I mumble.
“Then why are you crying? And don’t lie because I have already seen you. Do you still want me here?”
“Of course, Bo.”
“Then tell me. Please.”
“Maybe it reminded me of how alone I’m going to be again when you leave. Maybe it reminded me of just how alone I'm going to be period. Alone at home. Alone on the road. No matter how many people are around. I’ll always be alone. Fleeting moments with you but ultimately alone. And maybe I forgot what we were doing tonight. Maybe for a second I forgot it wasn’t real. Stupid huh? I think I’m just going to head to bed. You know where all the blankets and such for the couch right?”
He nods, not looking at me.
“Goodnight then.”
“Kass can we talk?”
I glance over my shoulder at Bo standing in the doorway between my bedroom and balcony. “Sure,” I shrug.
He sits in the second chair beside me, his eyes studying his hands.
“You don’t have to be alone, Kass.”
“Yeah, I know. I just gotta open myself up to other people. Let them in. Yadda, yadda, and all that other stuff every guy has spat at me when I become too much. I’m a cold bitch. I’m aware. You don’t have to come out here to remind me.”
“No! I mean yes, a good relationship requires openness. I don’t think you’re cold though, just guarded. I would never call you cold.”
“Thanks for that.”
“I meant that you don’t have to feel alone. You have me.”
“Until some great woman comes along and you are no longer accessible to me,” I smile sadly. “You deserve it so I know it will eventually happen.”
“And you don’t think you deserve a good guy?”
“I think that I don’t know how to be someone who good guys want to stick around for.”
“I do.”
“You know what I mean,” I grumble, standing.
“Yeah, I do,” he follows me to his feet.
“Then don’t do this right now.”
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t…Just don’t,” I move towards my room.
“I can’t not do something if I don’t know what it is,” he follows, grabbing my wrist.
“But you do know.”
“Don’t tell you that I love you? Or that I’ve been crazy about you from the day I first walked up to you in that bar. That I never wanted Curtis anywhere near you but I was too much of a pussy to admit it so I lied. And then you were with him and I had someone I thought would make me happy in your place. She wasn’t you though.”
Each statement tightens something in my chest. “Bo.”
He steps closer, continuing like I hadn’t spoke. “Don’t tell you that night of taking pictures to piss off my ex-wife was the best night of my life. The simple fact that someone wanted to spend time with me, not just be with me in name only. That I thought about that night for months. Then tonight, I decided to allow myself a small taste tonight. I can’t ever seem to stop thinking about you.”
“You can’t me get off your mind,” I breathe.
“Your lips against mine,” he growls, pulling me flush to his body. “Specifically. Dreaming about it. Now that I have the taste of you…I don’t know what to do with myself.”
“Bo,” I sigh. My lips touch his and Bo groan loudly, threading his fingers through my hair and deepening the kiss.
“Yeah,” he sighs breathlessly as we part before stealing a second kiss.
“I won’t tell you to stop. So please be sure about this. I can’t…I can’t lose you.”
Bo growls, sliding his hand down my neck and hauling me in for a third kiss. “You won’t. I can’t seem to stop kissing you."
“Good,” I smile against his lips, my fingers curling into his shirt. My back meets the wall, his weight pressing against me.
Bo gasps out when I pull away and press kisses to his neck. “Oh, Jesus, you can’t do that.” He hesitantly grips my hips. “I don’t know how much you want and if you do that, you’re probably going to end up with more than you bargained for.” He rasps, his words ragged as my lips move lower.
“Promise,” I ask playfully, raising to gently nip at his jaw. I’m startled by the growl he lets out.
I pull back to smile up at him.
“Please don’t tease me,” Bo grumbles. “Everyone always has a good laugh over my noises.”
“Laughing is basically the furthest thing from my mind right now. What other sounds do you make? Where do I need to touch you to make more noises,” I smile. “Can I take this off?”
He groans lowly in the back of his throat, stepping back slowly. “Are you sure?”
I nod, following him away from the wall, fingers wrapping in the hem of his tee. “Please.”
He nods shakily and I tug the shirt upwards, my nails scrapping over his skin lightly causing him to shiver. Tossing the shirt to the side, my eyes scan across his broad chest and toned arms. “Someone has not treated you right, Bo,” I smile. “Someone needs to change that.”
“I think I found someone,” he grins, sliding my shirt upwards. “I am a lucky man.” Bo mutters, halfway talking to himself as his eyes sweep down my body. Stepping forward again, I run a hand up his arm, memorizing every dip and bulge of muscle.
“Fuck,” he growls, lowering his forehead to my temple. “Such simple things turn me on.”
“Don’t make it too easy for me,” I grin, pulling him in for another kiss.
“Wouldn’t think about it,” he chuckles against my lips before tracing down my neck.
I giggle as his beard tickles my chest. My laughter dissipated into a whimper when he ghosted his mouth over one of my breasts, my nerves lighting up. His tongue and teeth quickly wake my left nipple, laving and tugging the flesh until the whimper burst out, “Bo…”
“I love the sound of my name from your lips.” He says bluntly, tweaking your nipple with his fingers as he moves to my other breast. “Again.”
I wrap my fingers through his hair to hold him in place. “Make me.”
He snarls against my skin lifting me. My back hits the mattress. “If we keep going…”
“Keep going,” I groan. “Please.”
Bo hunts for more kisses, barely giving me time to breathe before he starts fucking his tongue in and out of my mouth. His thumbs kept circling, teasing the taut skin of my breasts mercilessly.
Every groan and whimper seems to drive him more frantic. “I’m not going anywhere Bo,” I pant when his mouth leaves mine. “You have me. I promise.”
Bo groans against my skin, his hands dropping to the waistband of my panties. “Can I? Please?”
“Not from this position,” I smile.
He grins sitting back. Kneeling, he pulls my legs flush with his chest, hands sliding from my ankles down my legs. Wrapping his fingers around my waistband, he slowly removes the clothing. “I’m a lucky lucky man,” he grins, staring down at me.
“Come here and I can make you feel even luckier.”
“Not possible,” he smiles. “But I’m more interested in finding out if finding out if you taste as sweet everywhere.”
“Like…” the end of my question is cut off by a gasp. Teeth nipping at the sensitive skin of my inner thigh before a soft kiss.
“Like there,” he grins, draping my legs over his shoulders. “Or…”
I squeak, head reeling from how fast he moved then moan loudly at the tongue that was gently teasing my clit. “Bo.”
His firm grip on my hips, knees over his shoulders like they belonged there. He released you briefly to shove his hair back out of the way, flashing you a stomach-twisting smile. “This okay?”
I nod enthusiastically.
He laughs and returns his mouth to my cunt, lazily licking in long, slow strokes with the flat of his tongue. Throwing my head back, barely believing that this is happening on my bed. The thought had my belly filling with heat. “Please please please.” my voice cries out desperately, my whole body tense.
Bo growls into me, one arm sliding under my hips. “Oh, you don’t have to beg.” He reaches up with his other hand to tease at my entrance.
“Yes, Bo. Please.”
His finger breaches me, curling and I see stars.
“Now who’s making it easy,” he grins, shoving his hair back again. A second finger joins the first stroking along my spot, his thumb taking up his tongues previous actions against my clit. The heat and tension finally overwhelming me. “Bo,” I cry. Fucking hell.” I tremble as he continues through my orgasm.
“Kass. Baby?”
“Baby.” I question, peaking down at him.
“Too much,” he asks, licking his fingers clean.
“Only if you get up here,” I crook my finger at him.
“Not going to lie, that was the sexiest thing I have ever seen. I’m kinda’…I mean… I’m kinda’ wound up.”
I couldn’t help but smile back, my eyes half-lidded. “I don’t even care. You could last seconds and I would be satisfied.
“Don’t say that,” he mumbles. “You can’t let me off easy.”
“I’m sure you can make it up if you do,” I smile as he crawls up my body.
Leaning down, he kisses me hungrily on the mouth.
“Always.” he states breathlessly, slowly sheathing himself.
My eyes fall close and dig fingers into his shoulders with a whimper. Bo instantly stops. “Too much?” he gasped, his hands fisted in the blankets on either side of my head. “Say the word and I’ll get the fuck off of you, okay?” His voice had a ragged sound to it that made you shiver.
“I’m good, I’m fine. Just so full.”
“How do you know just the right things to say,” he groans against my ear as he starts to move. You have no clue what you do to me.” he growled, snapping his hips up into me.
“Bo,” I moan and he tenses up over me shuddering.
“My name sounds fucking good, coming from your mouth.” The heated words pouring out of him did things to me that I hadn’t anticipated. My refractory period is usually a bit longer, but Bo was hardly playing fair. “I’m yours, I’m all fucking yours Baby. Just say it and it’s yours. And I’m gonna’ cum. So p-please–” Bo’s voice hitched, and the way he helplessly buries his face in my neck and cried out tipped me over the edge seconds later
“S...So…Sorry,” he pants, mouthing sloppily over my throat as aftershocks rock through both of us.
“Jesus,” I sigh, hand sliding down the hair stuck to his back. “Don’t be. If that’s what you can do to me in that amount of time. I can’t wait to see what happens when your not preloaded.”
“Does that mean I don’t have to sleep on the couch,” he grins, peeking up at me.
“I will handcuff you to this bed if I have to,” I smirk.
“I’m up for new experiences,” he chuckles, rolling to his side and pulling me to his chest. “In the morning.”
“Morning, noon, night, or midnight,” I chuckle. “Just stay with me.”
“Always. But first, I have to clean up the mess that I made.”
“Clean me up just to get me dirty again,” I smirk, allowing him to pull me to my feet.
“Over and over and over again,” he growls against my ear. “You just have to open that pretty little mouth of yours.”
A/N: Sooooooo..... should there be a part 4 to this series?
