The Office of Andrew R. Nease.

General Tumblr page of Andrew R. Nease, writer in the Rockford, Illinois area. My other blog, Destructive Writing Course, has exactly one relevant post (maybe I'll change that soon) and a bunch of crap that should have gone here, but I was still figuring out how Tumblr worked. Homo non est nihil nisi homem. IMPORTANT: Now, I may be just a simple country lawyer, but where I come from, DMs are for private communication between people who already know each other or have business with each other, not spamming strangers with empty greetings. If you decide to DM me, I'll give you five responses in not more than two days to convince me you're the former, and then I'll report you for spam.

[todaysdocument]

Artwork: "Eugene Ely Taking Off from the USS PENNSYLVANIA - July 18, 1911". Artist: John McCoy. US Air Force Art Collection

Record Group 330: Records of the Office of the Secretary of DefenseSeries: Combined Military Service Digital Photographic Files 

A bi-plane with a single pilot (a Curtiss model D) takes off from a navy armored cruiser with a wooden platform installed over its deck.

[coolthingsguyslike]

[dogposts]

An archivist found a long forgotten 8mm film reel in an old metal box, marked “Philippines 1942”. Thinking it was lost WWII footage, he sent it in to be restored/digitized. When he got the footage back, he found puppies instead (via)

[gayluigi]

This is so freaking profound. Like, this was before the advent of the personal camera. Not just anyone owned a camera in these days. Cameras were expensive, and so was the film. When you were recording shit, it had to be stuff you were willing to shell out a pretty penny to have preserved. Someone so deeply and profoundly loved these dogs and found joy in them that they decided to preserve them for future generations to see, after these pups are long dead and gone. This camera operator wanted to preserve the joy these dogs brought them and to share it with others. How incredible is that?

[thegreenaper]

[aquilacalvitium]

Write it badly or it'll never be written

Write it badly or it'll never be written

Write it badly or it'll never be written

Write it badly or it'll never be written

Write it badly or it'll never be written

[aquilacalvitium]

Please keep interacting with this post because when I come to tumblr to procrastinate, this shows up again in my notifications and guilts me into writing again

[andrewrnease]

Yeah, I think I'm going to start periodically reblogging this myself so it's never far from the top: my Irish ass needs the guilt trip.

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I was in a store when I found a bag of chips that said "deetos". I bought it, then someone said it was theirs even though I was the person who bought it.

So, I beat them up while a character from that book about a babysitters' club watched.

[one-time-i-dreamt]

[cosmonautroger]

Tippi Hedren, 1982

[andrewrnease]

Oh, so that's how fucking big tigers are...

[homunculus-argument]

They people who have crazy long acrylic nails (the type that make your nail tech go "are you sure?" when you tell them how long you want them): If someone commented on your nails and said "they look like if you stuck that thing up my ass, I would straight up die."

would you consider that

an insult

a compliment

flirting

a mixture of two or more

other, please elaborate.

Remaining time: 8 hours 28 minutes

[andrewrnease]

I don't have nails like that, but if I did I think I would mostly just think that was funny.

[cikero]

did anyone else see that seal that just ended up on the street in connecticut

[cikero]

[bonyassfish]

No place for a little seal

[honeyyymmoon]

Zendaya attended The Odyssey NYC premiere in a striking Matières Fécales look that brought an ethereal feel to the red carpet. Defined by its sculptural silhouette and celestial details, the ensemble looked as though it had descended straight from the heavens.

[theehorsepusssy]

Hates monday

[homunculus-argument]

"I regret nothing" - me after I nothed

The Nother, who never regrets nothing.

[homunculus-argument]

your zucchini post sent me back over a decade ago to when i visited finland for the first time and stayed at my partners parents house. their garden was full of the most humungous zucchini i'd ever laid eyes on. my partner came up to me with this giant green sponge in her arms and said "look! it's the size of my dick!"; i remember distinctly being very impressed in that moment. however, what i did not know at the time was that having this bountiful harvest of zucchini meant that we would be eating nothing but zucchini based dishes for the next 7 weeks because there was no space to store it (why no storage, that's a whole other story). after about a week, everyone else in the family left to go to the lake for the rest of the summer and so it was up to my partner and i to eat zucchini day in, day out. it started out novel and fun really: zucchini on toast, stuffed zucchini with meat and mushrooms, zucchini casserole, zucchini and cheese soup! but as time went on, it got weirder and weirder, zucchini with jam on it, then the zucchini itself became marmalade, zucchini baked into a cake, zucchini stuffed with zucchini, zucchini bread, zucchini ice cream, and still more and more zucchini still needed to be consumed before they overippened and spoiled. and non of the neighbours wanted any of it because they too had too much zucchini of their own. needless to say, it was a very visceral experience that affected me in relation to zucchinis for many years afterwards. anyway, i hope the ones you got from your mother-in-law are tasty and you make something delicious with them <3

That's the funny part: I know this. We've been through this before.

Nobody in my boyfriend's family is particularly willing to eat zucchini. They are sick of it to the point of years of build-up. She playfully complains about how the youngest one won't try some of her baked goods out of an alledged fear that there might be zucchini hidden in there. And yet, she keeps planting zucchini. She's delighted to be able to hand them over to me. I am not yet sick of zucchini so I don't mind it just yet.

She also fucking loves foraging for mushrooms, and gets territorial over good spots just like any other finn would. As soon as they're poking out of the ground at the end of the summer she's grabbing the dogs and her daughter and is out of the house getting them, ticks bears and tourists be damned. She can't eat them herself due to allergies, and half of the family can't digest them either, and the other half just doesn't like the texture. She gives them off to friends and family and is delighted to be able to hand them over to me.

I don't mean to sound ungrateful, I'm not complaining. This is the opposite of a problem. Nonetheless I am baffled by it. Rain or shine, in sickness and in health, no matter how inconvenient it would be, she keeps doing this. Purely for the love of the game.

[thevaultoftheatomicspaceage]

[zendeyas]

Zendaya makeup by Ernesto Casillas – London premiere of The Odyssey

[homunculus-argument]

Day 200/365 of listing something good I saw today:

A gift from my mother-in-law: a homegrown zucchini the size of my dick.

[homunculus-argument]

Day 201/365 of listing something good I saw today:

Made a prettily arranged plate of thinly sliced zucchini, gently drizzled with the dark vingrainette sauce that I also was gifted because my boyfriend's dad bought a whole stash of it. Sent a picture of it to bf's mom, who liked it :)

[homunculus-argument]

Tomorrow I shall absolutely fuck up my hair. Haven't done that in a while. It's growing in too neat and tidy for my tastes.

[homunculus-argument]

I regret nothing.

[zendeyas]

Zendaya wearing MATIERES – New York premiere of The Odyssey