Yes, He's Judging You Based on Appearance: Part I The Face
I don’t care what anyone says the most important element when first meeting a potential benefactor is the physical; it is our main instrument of power.
My look screams highly sexual but yet not quite a whore. I have cultivated an image of myself that reeks of sexual energy. Some men have said it is my eyes- full of passion and lust. Others have said it is my voice. And many have said that I simply give off a vibration that just can not be explained. Of course some of these qualities do come naturally, but I have also heightened them intentionally.
The man that I want to attract is a straight, conservative, successful business man. They have to be very successful because my monetary goals are high and they are more then likely paying with after tax money.
Its not about me. They couldn’t care less what I want. At this point they only care about themselves.Of course the end goal is to make him your personal slave and have him fund your life as long as you need him to. Shit! maybe you even want to marry him. But for now its all about stirring interest and desire. So if you are interested in getting their money in your pocket, you need to figure out what is it they want.
Remember, power is not physical but psychological
More comfortable with young ladies opposed to hot babes.
They can afford to pay top dollars
Are willing to pay top dollar.
My targets also want a specific fantasy
I must seem as if I have no agenda of my own
I am there to listen to him
Hold an interesting conversation with him
Be pleasant and relaxing company
I have created an image which I know the man I want to attract desires. I guess in a fucked up sense I have created a role that has become my life.
What I am going to tell you is based on my experiences. I have broken it down into two sections (Face and Body) as the post was getting really long. This is what has worked for me and truth be told I believe could work for all women. It’s not for the lazy. It takes time, energy, money and discipline. Some might call it vanity, I call it personal ammo.
You honestly do not need to be the most beautiful woman in the world. I am most certainly not. But I have used the power of illusion and make-up. Now I’m not talking catfish but rather enhancing certain features.
The first two areas that people notice when they first look at you are your eyes and mouth. The eyes and mouth are the most powerful areas on the face for non-verbal communication. So I always make sure that these two areas are always on point.
Eyes:
I don’t wear a lot of coloured eye make-up looks, in fact I wear very little colour. My go to look is a brown smoky eye for day and something a little more dramatic for evenings. I always wear a winged eye-line day and night to create the illusion of cat eyes.
(This would be a typical daytime look for me)
Eyelash extensions are a must (if you were blessed with long full lashes, I envy you). Lash extensions open the eyes, make them appear bigger, and are essential in creating that doe-eyed, come-hither gaze. I like to get semi-permanent lashes applied and if I’m going for a dramatic look apply strip lashes over them.
I use Careprost (also known as Latisse) every other day on my lash line to keep my lashes healthy and help them grow with a nice curl (my eyelashes are naturally short and straight)
Eyebrows also fall in this category. I always have a nice and natural arch to my eyebrows. No drag queen eyebrows here. Naturally filled in brows. I always get a brow tint. Go to a professional, seriously go to a professional, it makes a difference.
(Perfectly filled, natural looking eyebrows. Neutral make-up look)
(Pretty make-up but those eyebrows! You would never see me walking the streets like this EVER)
For the last couple of weeks, I’ve been toying with the idea of getting dramatic results through Botox. It would give me the appearance of a brow lift and even bigger eyes. It’s definitely on my to do list.
At all times my eyes must look immaculate.
Lips:
I must admit I was blessed with beautiful lips. I am more of a neutral girl when it comes to lipsticks. I don’t wear loud shades. In rare occasions I might wear a red. My lips are a strong positive asset of mine and I don’t feel I need the adornment of loud colours to make them stand out. I’m definitely not knocking anyone that loves a loud lip colour, it just does nothing for me. What makes the most impact for me is a simple rose pink lipstick with a dash of sparkling gloss. Natural and feminine. The men I want to attract seem to love this look.
(This lady is about the same skin complexion as I am, this is the colour and intensity of gloss I would wear)
I don’t have any expenses regarding my lips besides a tube of lip-gloss a month (I go through lip-gloss at an insane rate). Occasionally I might buy a lip pumping product. My go to lip balm is the $1 Vaseline lip balms. I’m constantly applying it to my lips. I also exfoliate my lips nightly with the cheapest sugar body scrub I can find.
If your lips are thin try a cosmetic lip plumper that contains hyaluronic acid, they actually do work, if even temporarily. I would recommend Dior’s Lip Maximiser. Watch YouTube videos to learn make-up tips to create the illusion of a fuller lip.
If make-up isn’t enough I’m all for lip fillers. Done right the results can be powerful yet subtle.
Even with my full lips I plan to do a little tweaking cosmetically in the new year.
Just playing on these two features subtly can create a massive difference. Even people I know will comment on how great I look after getting my lashes filled or using a lip plumper. The thing is they can’t pinpoint exactly what has changed.
I know that these two features are the most important on the face because I get compliments on at least one without fail.
Make-up:
My make-up is always neutral, as I mentioned I like to keep the attention on my eyes and lips. However, my make-up is always flawless no matter how minimalist. I’ve been applying make-up since I was fifteen years old. I mastered the eyeliner by the age of fifteen and three-quarter, and by eighteen my contouring was Pulitzer prize worthy. Family and friends have always commented that make-up artistry is my calling.
At a young age I learned the power of make-up. What I learned was that there is a heightened femininity that is evoked through make-up. Use it to your advantage. Believe it or not, your make-up can actually turn a benefactor away. Although some guys dig make-up, most end up saying how much they dislike it and prefer “the natural look.” Tone it down. Less is more. Of course there are exceptions to everything. I am only speaking on the men I want to attract. You know, the more conservative money type.
Hair (lets throw this in as well):
Back when I religiously watched America’s Next Top Model, I always fantasized on how I would react if Queen Tyra decided that I drastically had to cut my hair. Would I sit crying hysterically in that chair while the scissor happy stylist chopped away my hope and dreams? Yes, I fucking would.
Like most girls my hair is up in a bun (or bonnet) the minute my iPhone connects to the home Wi-Fi. I have lost more bobby pins than I can remember and when the struggle is real– I sometimes use a rubber band (ouch).
Even tough I’ve attempted to style my hair, I just don’t have the talent. I use to spend hours on hair forums and YouTube trying to find the best thing to do with my hair. I’ve had them all: clip-in extensions, wigs, weaves, I even chopped my hair THREE times in the hope of going au natural curly girl.
As my desire to attract a certain man grew stronger, I developed a desire for a signature look. A look that encompassed sex appeal to me. What works for me is mid-length below the shoulder hair.
(Similar daily style; easy upkeep)
Of course hair is only a part of who I am but it completes the packaging. Hair isn’t a magical puzzle; as long as it is well groomed, soft, touchable and glossy you are in the right direction.
The key to the face is that everything must dazzle, but must also be harmonious, so that no single feature draws attention.
So how much does it cost to maintain this look?
These are my constant expenses when I am on the hunt. Obviously this will fluctuate at times depending on if I need new make-up, a more intense facial treatment or if I just want to try a new product.
2 week touch-up- $230 ($115 for each touch up x 2 times a month)
1 bottle usually last me about 3 months, I buy six bottles at a time which cost me $18 per bottle
Full Face Wax (I’m a hairy beast)
Initial Weave Installation- $200
Wash & Style- $200 ($50 a week)
Every month I can spend anywhere from $759 to $944 just on my face. Yikes! The thing is money attracts money. I am not looking for the $2K a month benefactor (though they can come in handy- will save that for another post). That’s why I stress it’s necessary that you are capable of at least providing your basic human needs(food, shelter, water) and the tools needed to play the game.
You honestly can’t say you’re surprised that fishing for a big whale of a benefactor comes with a hefty price tag — are you?
I’ll post Yes, He’s Judging You Based on Appearance: Part II The Body tomorrow
Side note: The last few years have been eye opening and I want to share these experiences. This is about my love for writing what you’re reading. My passion to share things and inspire others. This is about me wanting to do something I enjoy. Writing these thoughts that float in my head not only is therapeutic but also helps me hone my own skills.
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