Кстати забавно как с преподавательницей обсуждали то, что можно милльён раз сыграть одно и тоже с листка, а потом тупа не помнить че и как без этого самого листка 😃
Ещё забавнее когда ты эту шелуху сама написала, а потом даже подглянуть некуда
I’ve finally started writing down my life experience and reflecting on how my introduction to Per’s life changed me in the most normal yet sometimes absurd ways.
I’ve been thinking about him a lot, but not in the “internet weird” direction, but as a neighbourhood kid that I didn’t know much about.
In my opinion, our culture has popularised the dehumanisation of media and the conception of life & death itself. Nowadays, “we” look at each other or those millions of people on the internet, and “we” don’t see real human beings.
The Overton Window towards people’s death or suicide has worked. So it’s no longer bothering anybody when, on a daily basis, the internet floods with thousands of “kys” comments.
What does all of that mean if talking about Per? He was a victim of his own time. As Dmitry Medvedev once said: “I can only tell you one thing: no one will ever go back to 2007…” Oh, and that means that even if you could go back to 1991, you couldn’t help or even try to save him. Because of his deep emotional pain, because of the amount of pressure from the religious society of the country he lived in. And also, it was not that common knowledge that his sort of “troubles” were solvable.
Now “we” do have a lot of ways of coping with depression, PTSD, anxiety, and suicidal tendencies. Sertraline became a real thing only after 1991, as it was only then when it was accidentally invented as an SSRI (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor). Nowadays it’s one of the most popular antidepressants.
But back when Per was still living, there was no such common thing as therapy. He was born in a society that practiced castration on mentally disabled people, and it ended only after 1976 (the last registered medical operation was around 1976). The mood amongst people in Sweden was not positive towards mental disorders, and so those who had some sort of disorders were stigmatised because of it.
Oh, and yet I’ve forgotten to mention that Per had an episode of clinical death and bullying, which made him obsessed with death. Suicidomania was one of his character traits. I can’t claim anything for sure, but I firmly believe in his comorbidity.
Per lived already 34 years ago, and as we know, it was intense, like it always is. So it’s extremely difficult to collect all the data from the pre-public internet world. But I’ll try my best to do what I can. The story of how he lived, how he died, and what we have now, 34 years later, has forever changed my way of looking at things.
I’ll try to write more about “that specific photo” of him later and what lesson I’ve learned from it. Don’t blame yourself for maybe owning it; I guess your experience is just right behind next door.
I’m not doing my research to prove anything; I’m just trying to destigmatise people and their pain (myself included) because nobody wants to die, they only want to stop hurting. It’s not funny or even cool if you thought of suicide because of him. It’s not human-like to make fun of someone who felt disconnected and alone that much, so they committed suicide because of Per.
And if you thinking of suicide - he’ll never see your pain and feelings and how edgy your tshirt looks, but those who still breathe will. Be careful with yourself and others.
it was a sound so very loud... but no one can hear
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So in honour of the Oasis reunion and because I'm tired of people shitting on this album and saying the lyrics are shit (I'm looking at you Noel), I've decided to do my analysis of my favourite album of theirs, the much-maligned Be Here Now (1997).
(warning: long post)
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You can dislike the length of the songs. You can dislike the production. (Although I don't think the production is all that different from the first 2 albums. There's exactly the same amount of bass, it's just a bit more dense, that's all.) But it properly gets on my nerves when people talk about how the lyrics are shit when they are just objectively more meaningful than most of the songs on the first 2 albums.
Even Noel said it at the time:
The first two albums, the lyrics are a bit…I don’t know anyone called Sally, and I don’t know what a champagne supernova is. I suppose these lyrics are a bit more realistic. A bit more personal.
- Noel Gallagher, 1997
But something changed I guess?
All the songs are really long and all the lyrics are shit and for every millisecond that Liam is not saying a word, there's a fuckin' guitar riff in there in a Wayne's World stylie.
- Noel Gallagher, 2003
Noel blames the production and song lengths on doing too much cocaine in the studio, but I think he would be the first to admit that some songs on the next album, like Little James and Sunday Morning Call, are also too long and over-produced. I think that was just the style he liked in that period.
At the end of the day I think a lot of criticisms of this album are cop-outs and cliches. No one whinges and moans when My Bloody Valentine overdubs a million guitar tracks on Loveless (1991) to get a massive sound. But because Oasis are primitive pub-rockers that made it too big, anything that doesn't fit into the arbitrary standards set for them must be a self-indulgent mess, and not something that has artistic merit.
... there are a lot of sheep out there, aren’t there? And if the main guy [Noel] says, “Oh, it’s fuckin' this and that,” a lot of people not using their own minds say, “Yeah, I agree.” If Noel had said it’s the best thing ever, I’m sure it’d have gotten a different fuckin' reception. The reason why he didn’t like it is because it reminds him of a not-so-good time with his ex-wife. That’s fine. That’s his prerogative.
- Liam Gallagher, 2017
At that time we thought it was fuckin' great, and I still think it's great. It just wasn't Morning Glory.
- Liam Gallagher, 2003
Definitely Maybe was me sat at home dreaming of being a young, free rock star living it large. Morning Glory was actually doing it. This one is wishing I was still fucking back at home doing what I was doing before it all kicked off.
- Noel Gallagher, 1996
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1. D'You Know What I Mean?
All my people right here, right now...
We played there for years and no one took any notice. Now all of a sudden we're Manchester's long-lost sons. Either that or they hate us. All these so-called friends who're saying 'I remember you when you were nothing.' Well, I don't want to remember it so fuck off.
- Noel, 1994
Step off the train all alone at dawn
Back into the hole where I was born
The sun in the sky never raised an eye to me
I really love this opening - it feels like the start of a movie - that feeling of 'going back to where it all started'. It tells you right off the bat that this album is gonna be a bit darker and more introspective than the previous two.
The next lines are easy targets to denigrate as "lazy writing" or "cheap references", for those unwilling to read between the lines.
There's blood on the tracks and it must be mine
The Fool On The Hill and I Feel Fine
Don't look back cause you know what you might see
But this is really good lyric writing! It's no mistake that he chose to reference Dylan on this particular song. Allusions to memories of childhood wrapped up in a tribute to his deepest influences. Pain and abuse and growing up with the Beatles.
Here's another great couplet from the 2nd verse:
Coming in a mess, goin' out in style
I ain't good lookin' but I'm someone's child
When it gets to the chorus I have a little more sympathy for those calling it vacuous or inane. But I truly think there is a deep profundity even in the absurdity.
All my people right here, right now
D'you know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah
But I get, y’know, at the time… it kind of… it seemed like it meant something… I think.
- Noel, 2010
Going back to the pre-chorus, Noel is asked by his "maker", "why his people won't fly through the storm?", to which Noel replies: "listen up man, they don't even know you're born." It feels like a loss of faith but also, speaking of Dylan, that part reminds me of the song Ballad of a Thin Man, in which Dylan venomously sings of a Mr. Jones, who doesn't understand and could never understand the scene unfolding around him.
That's why Noel sings to "my people", because Oasis is and always has been for the fans, because the true fans understand, and no one else deserves an explanation because there isn't an explanation, it just is what it is.
Q: So Oasis is a band that's about the sound and feel of songs more than what they say?
It's about the connection and the emotion between the band and the audience.
- Noel, 1996
All my people right here, right now
They know what I mean
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2. My Big Mouth
Slowly down the hall of fame...
This song is clearly at least partly inspired by Noel's battles with the press, which he explicitly states in the pre-chorus.
That's what you get for sleeping with the enemy/NME
Noel has admitted to regretting a lot of things he's said in interviews, and that humility is in the chorus.
Into my big mouth, yeah, you could fly a plane
There's only so much trouble that your big mouth could get you when you're on the dole in Manchester, but it's a different story when you're the spokesman for the biggest band in the world. He expands on this in the 2nd verse:
'I ain't never spoke to God/I ain't never been to heaven', that's about fans who think you're on the phone to John Lennon and you have all the answers.
- Noel, 1997
And as you look into the eyes
Of a bloody cold assassin
It's only then you realise
With whose life you have been messing
I've always sworn I'll never refuse an autograph or whatever, so I open the door... Then this thought comes to me. Mark Chapman. He's here. I'm gonna get shot!
- Noel, 1996
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3. Magic Pie
I've been and now i've gone...
The first line, 'An extraordinary guy/Can never have an ordinary day', comes from him [Liam] asking me, 'How come you never get into any of the situations I get into?'
- Noel, 1997
So this song starts off being about Liam.
Liam was always cooler than me... He had a better walk. Clothes looked better on him and he was taller. And he had a better haircut.
- Noel, 2016
I dig his friends, I dig his shoes
He is just a child with nothing to lose but his mind
But then it shifts focus in the pre-chorus, showing that the song is actually about himself, Noel.
But I'll have my way
In my own time
I'll have my say
My star will shine
~
Cos you see me, I got my magic pie
This is where some people start to check out. "stupid title, this is nonsense, wtf is a magic pie???"
I actually think it's pretty obvious when you put it in the context of the song. What sets Noel apart from Liam? The songs. It's his songs. His band. His talent. His 'magic pie'. Music.
It came in a vision – a man appeared on a flaming pie and said unto them, 'from this day on you are Beatles with an A.'
- John Lennon's explanation for the name 'The Beatles'
This might be just a coincidence (and it must be a coincidence that Paul McCartney released his album Flaming Pie just three months before Be Here Now) but Noel certainly wasn't shy about putting Beatles references on this album in particular.
Which brings us to the end of the chorus, which (in my interpretation) introduces the most puzzling theme of the album - which was only hinted at in the chorus of My Big Mouth - Noel’s apparent belief that the demise of Oasis was soon to come, or in fact had already happened.
Think of me, yeah that was me, I was that passerby
I've been and now I've gone
It's an elaboration of the endless refrain of "slowly down the hall of fame" on the previous song, and it's a deeply prophetic line, considering how the fortunes of Oasis plummeted after the release of Be Here Now. Not in a commercial sense, but in the sense of being a band that mattered. Noel could obviously see it coming. It's a theme that is consistent throughout the album, and it really adds an air of melancholy.
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4. Stand By Me
Nobody knows the way it's gonna be
The humility from My Big Mouth continues into the first lines of this song:
Made a meal and threw it up on Sunday
I've got a lot of things to learn
Said I would and I'll be leaving one day
Before my heart starts to burn
All Noel's early songs are about wanting to leave the town you grew up, in search of greener pastures.
I'll paint you the picture
Cause I don't think you live round here no more
I've never even seen the key to the door
- Fade Away (1994 B-side)
This song is also about leaving, but in a very different way. He's discovered that maybe those greener pastures don't exist.
Times are hard when things have got no meaning
I found the key upon the floor
Maybe you and I will not believe in
The things we find behind the door
There's an un-sentimentality about the pre-chorus which feels like disillusionment. It reinforces the loss of faith from the opening track.
But don't you know the cold and wind and rain don't know
They only seem to come and go away
Spirituality is a load of bollocks, right. You get up in the morning, you have something to eat, you do whatever it is you do during the day, you have something to eat at night, you have a drink, and then you go to bed. That's it.
Q: So where do the songs come from, then?
Well... that's my spiritual side, innit?
- Noel, 1997
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5. I Hope, I Think, I Know
You'll never forget my name
This song is another message to the critics, and another prophetic insight into the future of Oasis. There's one particularly succint but poignant lyric which I feel like sums up Noel's state of mind at this time:
I feel a little down today
And I ain't got much to say
But you're gonna miss me when I'm not there
Noel is always the first to point out that being rich and famous is infinitely preferable to being on the dole, but that just makes it hit harder when he suggests that maybe the Oasis rock'n'roll lifestyle isn't all it's cracked up to be.
As we beg and steal and borrow
Life is hit and miss, and this
I hope, I think, I know
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6. The Girl In The Dirty Shirt
You've got a feeling lost inside...
Noel has said that this song was about his then wife, Meg Mathews, but in the context of the album, it almost feels like a response to the melancholy of the previous songs, as if he's having a conversation with himself.
Why'd you need a reason for to feel happy
Or shining for the rest of the world
Give me just a smile and would you make it snappy
Get your shit together girl
And again, there's a feeling of "the dream is over", although this time it's a bit more optimistic.
Cause to me it doesn't matter
If your hopes and dreams are shattered
And once more, it's about leaving the life of fame.
If you ever find yourself inside a bubble
You've gotta make your own way home
When you're famous... it's like you travel in a little bubble anyway. So, you don't really have any roots.
- Noel, 1997
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7. Fade In-Out
Tomorrow we'll be cast away...
But I do think [D'You Know What I Mean] and a song on the album called 'Fade In-Out' are the best two lyrics I've ever written.
- Noel, 1997
Similarly to D'You Know What I Mean, this song is kind of retrospective, but of the history of the band rather than childhood.
Coming in out of nowhere, singing rhapsody
You gotta be bad enough to wanna be
Sitting upside the high chair, the devil's refugee
Is gonna be blinded by the light that follows me
Another similarity is that it also emphasises that connection to the audience. In other words, they came out of nowhere to be a light for people in a dark place. It makes their constant use of the word "shine" feel a bit more meaningful.
And then, of course, the chorus. The "fade in-out" wordplay feels like the "hit-and-miss" lyric - there are good and bad moments along the way. But it can't be understated how the chorus is the most explicit moment of Noel foreseeing the downfall of Oasis.
We're fading out
Without a doubt
I don't see no shine
Today is just a daydream
Tomorrow we'll be cast away
It's ironic, it's insane, (or is it just self-reinforcing?) just how accurately it describes the dramatic reversal of opinion of the album (and of the band in general) that was yet to happen, from universal praise to universal disappointment in a matter of months. It has to be said that this could only reinforce any negative feelings that Noel had at the time.
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8. Don't Go Away
Cause I need more time...
How better to get past all the preceding angst than with a simple love song? Except this one is also angsty.
In fact, this song might be the most angsty, the verses being endless agonising over "the things caught in my mind". Again he expresses frustration over his current lifestyle, while also harkening back to childhood.
Damn my situation, and the games I have to play
With all the things caught in my mind
Damn my education, I can't find the words to say
With all the things caught in my mind
It's true that in the north, boys are educated to become strong men, without states of mind. I've never cried.
- Noel, 1997
When our kid made me listen to Don't Go Away for the first time, I cried.
- Liam, 1997
The chorus uses a similar chord progression to Slide Away, but rather than being a youthful dream of escape, this song is the opposite - a more mature song about wanting someone to stay. In this way it's also a response to all the previous songs - songs about leaving and changing.
But as the song gets to the end, it feels like pleading in vain, as the refrain "Cause I need more time, just to make things right" gets more and more desperate. Because the winds of change must come eventually.
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9. Be Here Now
You betcha!
Finally... a classic chest-thumping feel-good Oasis anthem.
It took us a while to get there.
More messages to the critics. It seems Noel might've held a grudge.
Flash your pen at the song that I'm singing
And then a line that seems like nonsense, but is actually a reference to the typical Oasis fashion.
Wrap up cold when it's warm outside
1996 AOL Webchat
Q: hiya..I'm from Stockport...how come the wearing of the fur coat all the time..isn't it like way too hot under stage lights?
Noel: absolutely... bloody roastin'
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10. All Around The World
What you gonna do when the walls come falling down?
Imagine how much better Hey Jude would have been with three key changes.
- Noel, 1997
Here we are. The monstrosity. All 9 minutes and 20 seconds of it. The logical end-point of Oasis. Written right back at the start of it all.
Except was it all written back then? In the 1992 rehearsal tape, Liam just repeats the 1st verse instead of singing the 2nd verse. It seems likely that the 2nd verse was written in 1996 along with all the other Be Here Now tracks.
The first verse is typical of Noel's early songs. Dreaming of the future, dreaming of escape. But the 2nd verse is oddly bitter for such a feel-good song.
What you gonna do when the walls come falling down?
You never move, you never make a sound
Where you gonna swim with the riches that you found?
If you're lost at sea, well I hope that you drown
Again, it almost feels like Noel is having a conversation with himself.
But that all melts away when it gets to the chorus. Is it meaningful? Not particularly. But the refrain "You know it's gonna be OK" is a sentiment they've been singing since Oasis was born, and it's no more inane than when the Beatles sang "don't you know it's gonna be alright" in Revolution.
And then it builds. And it builds. Until finally it climaxes with Liam's cry of:
Please don't cry, never say die
There it is. The essence of Oasis boiled down into six words.
I truly believe that the guitar solo that follows is where Oasis peaked. It might sound like an unbearable brick wall to some people but it sounds heavenly to me. Astoundingly uplifting music.
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11. It's Gettin' Better (Man!!)
Maybe the dreams that we dream are gone
Well, if you thought the logical end-point of Oasis would be the logical end-point of the album, you'd be right. But Oasis have never let logic get in the way of ambition.
This is the song for the people who thought All Around The World was too lofty and grandiose. Here's a more down-to-earth declaration of the Oasis philosophy.
Say something
Shout it from the rooftops of your head
Make it sort of mean something
Make me understand or I'll forget
It links back to the chorus of The Girl In The Dirty Shirt: "when you say something/you make me believe".
But then Noel makes one of the most startling admissions of doubt ever.
Maybe the songs that we sing are wrong
Maybe the dreams that we dream are gone
I've always wished that Noel could've followed up those lines with something satisfying to lead into the chorus, rather than the throwaway line "Bring it on home and it won't be long".
But maybe that's the point. There isn't a satisfying answer to those questions. And all you can say when things can't get worse is IT'S GETTING BETTER MAN!!!!!! with the most blatant Beatles reference yet. And they'll keep singing it as Oasis rides off into the sunset.
Even if it means nothing
You'll never ever feel that you're alone
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12. All Around The World (Reprise)
" . . . "
lol.
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*BONUS* ~B-sides~
Here's part of the chorus of Flashbax, which I think perfectly encapsulates some of the themes of the album:
Sitting on a throne will give a bad back to you
Living on my own was like a flashback
To the days when I was lost and lonely
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Anyway, as that door slammed to mark the end of their third album, I feel like Oasis were never the same again. As many great songs as there were to come, it was a bit more few and far between in the 200s. But those first three albums were something special.
It’s been 2 years since I fell that rabbit hole of angels friends fandom. Now I decided to redraw those little precious creatures, so I could finally make them the way they should’ve been made 2 years ago…but since the lack of skill and knowledge I drew them differently. I still love them though…
prguitarman
gummygunk
pixelskylines
2087
izzy806
blakekathryn
