Anonymous Secrets

Ever had a secret you never could share? A wild fantasy you could never speak about? Here is the place you can share, and be anonymous while doing so. Check it out. You won't regret it. Email me, or PM me a secret that you have never told anyone...

[anonsecrets00]

When things were great, they were great When our music tastes matched, they were pretty on point When we played, we gelled as much, if not more than anyone else I've played with. Our kinks were so in tune with each other, in the years I've been on the scene, I've never had anyone who saw a bigger picture of me..... But when things were too much, I couldn't cope with it. When things weren't right, I knew we couldn't be together, but I was scared of hurting you & pushing you away. When you told me your plans for years down the line, it pushed me away So why, even though I knew so early on that we wouldn't work, do I still think of you fucking daily? Why do I still want to be with you? Hear your voice, and still be able to be as close to you as I once was? I miss you, so fucking dearly, but I know that I'll never get experience what we once had ever again, and I'm terrified that I'll have to wait another fucking 4 or more years before I'll ever meet anyone like you, if I ever get to that is. I'm sorry it couldn't work, I'll take that regret to the grave

[anonsecrets00]

You hear about people finding out something new about themselves. Could be that they like clams, like being tied up, or like more than one sex. Or maybe that they had ADD or dyslexia. But it doesn't really sink in how possible it is for everyone until it happens to you. The thought didn't even occur to me until the last time my father made this comment. We were throwing a surprise party and I had to lure them to where they needed to go. "I had no idea!" "Yeah, my son has quite the poker-face doesn't he?" I don't know why, but this comment stuck with me. Suddenly, memories of people not knowing what I'm feeling or thinking I'm mad at them were coming up. Not getting "hints" and being told afterwards I missed out on something I could have been a part of. Even this sense that nobody else has the same interests as I. For a long time, I tried to employ a "brutally honest" approach to communication, but I never thought of how much I relied on it. Especially in this community where I never thought it would fail me. The more I thought about it and the more others pointed it out, the more I thought something was wrong. At least off. I may have just taken the preliminary test, and nothing is certain until it's formally diagnosed, but I found out I may have autism. How do you respond to that? What do you do? What's the responsible thing to do? When you have difficulty discerning emotion, is it even a good idea to be a part of a community that's all about communication? I'm honestly worried about this. How much pain have I already caused? How can I move forward? I'm not expecting anything, but I had to say something, and I can't come out with it yet to the people who know me. It just hurts to think of who I might have affected badly because of this.

31, Male

[anonsecrets00]

Nobody wants to know me. People seem to like/fancy me when they meet me but no one ever takes the time to contact me, to ask me how I am, or invite me to anything. I did an experiment last year (2016) to test this, to make sure it's not me being paranoid. Question; How many people who aren't related to me will contact me without me contacting them first?? Answer; Four(4)........... Yes, that's right. 4. All the people who know I exist, and you could count the ones who care if I still do on one hand. And I haven't heard from two of those at all this year (2017) I've stopped going out to try and meet new people, I don't go to munches or events or other socials. I don't see the point. If the people who already know me don't want to, why would anyone who hasn't met me yet. Lonely Womble.

-42, Male

[anonsecrets00]

Daddy I'm sad. I'm sad I can't curl up at your feet and lay my head on your lap while you pet my hair. I want to feel your fingers brush the side of my face as you tuck my hair aside. I'm sad that I don't get to feel your arms wrapped around me, pulling me close after we finish a scene. I miss the way I find comfort in your voice as you brush the tears away. I love being a good girl for you Daddy. I'm sad that I don't get to look deep into those eyes when I kneel in front of you waiting for a command to fall from your lips. I want to feel your strong hand lifting my chin to meet your gaze. I'm sad I don't get to hear those sweet words whispered into my ear late in the night as we are tangled up in the sheets on the edge of sleep. I miss the warmth of your breath on my neck as your wrap your arms around me and pull me close. Holding me till I slip into the land of dreams. Above all else I'm sad that I no longer have you.  Sad that someone else has taken my place because now I'm not just sad but I'm broken too. A Baby Girl with a broken heart is the hardest to help piece back together. I'm sad Daddy and your the one who made me feel this way. I'm not sure I can fix myself.

-No Age, Female

[anonsecrets00]

I have people that care about me, or supposedly they do. They always want to ask what they can do, but they have always gotten the same answer. Too many times, I have learned in the past to not rely on others. Not even my own parents. So I always answer with, I will be fine. And they carry on, but on the inside I am screaming so loud. I am screaming and crying for help. Screaming and crying for them to reach out a hand and grab me. To pull me close, to not let me go. To, for a moment in time, to just not be strong. And the thing is, I tell people I am a liar. I lie when it comes to me. Ya, they get to hear about the struggles.... but never get to hear about the struggle right now. I don't let people in, I don't let people see it. And just for once, I want someone to see me. To reach out and grab ahold of me.

-29, Male

[anonsecrets00]

One day... I'll stop letting people in. I'll stop caring when people disappoint me. I'll stop myself from entering into any kind of DD/lg, because everytime I do, I get hurt. I'll stop giving people my time. I'll stop believing in others and the words they say. Hopefully one day

-No Age, Male

[anonsecrets00]

Several years ago, I had a girlfriend that lived with me for a while. I was working nights at the time. When I would go to work, she would go fuck my neighbors and their roommates. This went on for a while without my knowledge. One night I got home and was eating her out. She seemed was unusually went. She started laughing at me. Then she wrapped her legs around my head, holding me there, and showed me a video of them fucking and cumming inside of her. The rest of the night, she made me listen to her talk about fucking other men. When we went to bed, she stripped naked, but wouldn't let me touch her. I never told her, but I think she could tell the even though I was humiliated, I was very excited at the same time.

-27, Male

[anonsecrets00]

I met a guy a few years ago on a few month after I joined Fet, and we had a rather short but passionate..ummm..relationship, for lack of a better word. I know he wasn't really truthful with me about some things, but damn, he was fun to play with. Looking back, I think he was like me, wanting to avoid confrontation.There were a couple of times we had made plans and he bailed at the last minute, and later I realized it was because he found someone else he wanted to be with. I just wish he would've let me know he'd become interested in someone else sooner than he did. He and I had exchanged a couple of PMs over the next couple of years, but it was just small talk. I was very conflicted in the way I felt about him, sometimes angry, sometimes I thought I could handle just PM-ing now and then, and be okay with that. What I really wanted more than anything was for the anger I felt to go away. Last November we were writing and I thought it would be fun to maybe to play with him and his GF, they are both bi-sexual. I told him to let me know if he and his GF were interested in meeting me, and he said they were. We've written each other a couple of times since then, but we don't seem any closer to meeting. In writing him I've felt the old anger grow less, but I'm thinking now he's just leading me on. I'm going to be leaving the area soon, and I wish I could see him before I leave. But I'm thinking it's just time to let it go...

-No Age, Female

[anonsecrets00]

I write this without knowing if you will read it, because I don't know if I have the courage and strength to send this to you. I don't think I can go on with this. Maybe one day we will meet again, maybe then we will both be in better places, maybe there will be a time when we can and will be together. Now, I struggle with so many things in my life, I need more from you than you can give me. I need to be able to talk to you when the going gets tough and I need to be able to talk to you on an ordinary day, and I need you to talk to me too. I need you to be more responsive and to check in with me, even if it's just to say hi and that you can't chat. I need that connection because I'm insecure about us, for obvious reasons. If I send you messages on fet or wechat and you keep doing this thing where you don't respond or don't answer questions, I'll end up searching for someone else to chat with. I'm not threatening you, I'm just being honest. I like the chat. When I don't hear from you without any notice, and I want to talk to you and don't know what's going on it makes me worry about what I thought we had. Then I automatically think that you're busy with someone else so then I look for someone else to chat with to take my mind off you. I want you to change your status. I want others to know that you're with me. When you're ready to do these things then we can talk.

-40, Female

[anonsecrets00]

The amount of scenarios I have run through my mind is enough to make anyone's head spin. Unfortunately they all end with me in tears. Either you say goodbye or I do because it's too much for either of us to handle. It sucks because part of me wishes we could go back to the way things were and the other part of me doesn't. The part of me that wants it wants to just curl up with you and cry over what happened and work to fix it all. The part of me that doesn't wants you to come to me and tell me your sorry and it was just a mistake just so I can tell you this is a path we have gone down before and I can't go through it again. It always ends the same way. I don't want to get stuck in this loop. You and I have an incredible connection...at least I think so but the problem is that it always lands us in trouble. One moment your here and the next your not. Months go by without us seeing each other or even talking and the next we are having one of our little flings. What makes it hard is I get the feels for you so damn fast and I hate trying to stop them. You have always been one of those people I miss having around and I hate that I end up missing you so much. I don't want you out of my life but I would rather you be gone for good than in and out over the years. I love you and in a way I always have and part of me always will. You have said you don't want anything more from this and just want to be friends. I don't think we can be friends. Us being friends leads to hooking up at parties and library bathrooms. Still, I want to try because I'm not entirely ready to say goodbye to you. That's me being selfish. Hoping that something changes, which is me being unrealistic. I'm just not ready for it yet but I don't know how to move towards either choice I have. We try and stay friends and I torment myself trying to keep a healthy distance from you or I push myself to cut ties with you and say goodbye. I wish there was an easy way to figure this all out. Time is what I need, what we need. In just hope we can respect each other enough to give it that.

-25, Female

[anonsecrets00]

I've been in a secondary poly relationship with a married man for a number of years. He splits his time between his marital home and mine, with full disclosure with his wife and other partners. Our dynamic has always been that he is the Dominant partner and I am submissive, but I wasn't ready at the beginning to give control outside the bedroom after being burned too many times in the past. At the point in our relationship that I did feel comfortable with it, we were both hurt by a partner and friend, and it stole that trust from us both once again. Now, a few years later, the dynamic is expanding once again to outside the bedroom with structure and rules that outline more of a 24/7 lifestyle (maybe 16/6 is closer to the truth), and another long-term LDR partner of mine is taking a more active dominant role (after discussion and acceptance by everyone involved) in the little ways they are able over great distance. The Internet is a beautiful thing. However I'm seeing very little from my poly partner. The things we've discussed aren't happening, broken rules are being ignored, he's acting resentful toward my LDR Sir, and he's either stewing, closing down, or lashing out in ways that are passive-aggressive and hurtful. All of this is leaving me confused and directionless, which is exactly what we had all talked about fixing! I love him and want him to be part of my life, both vanilla and BDSM sides of it, but I need him to take charge rather than being a service Top who's only fulfilling what he thinks I want. I need him to communicate, more than anything else, but I really want him to take the things I've given and be able to use them to make us stronger and better. It's hard to submit to someone who won't lead.

- No Age, Female

[anonsecrets00]

I'm in pain. My Daddy says he loves me but he doesn't. Not really. I think he wants to, but for whatever reason, he can't. He said I was his and i would have to follow his rules. I asked for weeks before I finally got them. He doesn't care enough to enforce them. I've broken every one and nothing. I want to play and try new things. He kinda plays sometimes. Just enough to keep me quiet and from going out of my mind with need. I always ask to try new things. He says ok, but we do the same things over and over. He hasn't changed his status, even though he says he's committed to me. I want to please, but he doesn't tell me what to do. I need direction and reassurance but he says everything is fine. It's not fine. I'm dying and you're killing me. Is this a part of the kink thing?

-45, Female

[anonsecrets00]

Sadly I was so horny years ago that I washed and used my mothers vibrator..... :( I was younger...and didn't have the money to buy my own....ect. I've always felt "disgusting" because of it.

-30, Female

[anonsecrets00]

What you did was shitty. You were an amazing boyfriend till this point. I get it you found someone you like enough to want to date...but what about me? What about us? We have spent years on this relationship and I think your throwing it away like nothing. I get that you two need time. Time is something I can give....but I could have given you time without us splitting up. I could have given you both the space you needed but no. I get tossed away completely like I don't even matter. Did I ever matter? You say I did but how much of it was true? I'm really hurt by the both of you. She said she was willing to try. So now all of a sudden why are you not willing? I get that it's a lot to handle. No one said it would be easy. Fighting for something you want to make work is hard. It can be challenging and emotionally draining but giving up? I thought you were a better man than that.

-25, Female

[anonsecrets00]

I have a secret...I had sex with my ex step son...!! First he is 23 years old and I'm 32. Second his father and I have been divorced for years (never did anything with my step son while he was my step son). Lost touch with him for a few years but recently he found me again (ironically on here). Really threw me that he could have seen all the pics and stuff on here. We met up to just catch up, ended back at my place to watch GoT (he hadn't seen the new episodes and I have HBO)...next thing I know we are going to my room. Sex was great!! Third...I really want to keep doing stuff with him.

-32, Female

[anonsecrets00]

He never asked me. For the last 2 years when he would have rarely have sex with me, I would cry. He didn't care for my climax. He didn't want to touch me. He didn't care what I needed. No, he never forced me. He never would have had to. I wanted him. I burned for him like the fire needs for oxygen. And now that he is gone, I can't help but wonder, why am I so sad? I used to be such a sexual being. I craved sex. I wanted it all the time...and then came him. I love him. He may have never loved me. Perhaps even in the beginning he used me to get out of his "prison". Now, I hardly recognize myself. In the past 2 years, I have only orgasmed once or twice by someone other than myself. That person wasn't him and wasn't even in a relationship with me. He never asked me why I would cry. Looking back, I can see it for what it was. How did I ever let myself sink so low that I thought that was what I deserved? Do I miss his arms or just knowing that there was someone in the great abyss that loves me? If he loved me, how could he just leave me...over and over again. I think he blamed me for his accident. I think he blamed me that he didn't do more than expected afterwards. I wasn't even in the car with him at the accident. I hadn't told him to hurry home as, I wasn't there. Actually I was out enjoying a day with family. Beyond just me, how could he just throw away our family. We loved him. We clothed and sheltered him when he was without. It doesn't even matter where he went. He stopped being here the second he found someone else who he thought would show him something new. She is shiny and new. I am a comfy old fool. Believing that one day, someone will love me...that he will love me... Why would I want his love...he clearly didn't want mine. Why?

-44, Female

[anonsecrets00]

You act like I'm chasing you. In. Your. Fucking. Dreams. Look at yourself..... Really? Need your pathetic ass? Hahaha Plenty of cock out here that isn't married. You cry not wanting to go home to her. I felt sorry for you. I was wrong You used me, You lied that's on you! You are a disgusting person inside and out.

-No Age, Female