just a normal kid trying to live in gotham @anormalkidingotham - Tumblr Blog

sometimes living in gotham is scary and dangerous but then sometimes you see king shark crying in an empty alley because he got half a car door stuck between his teeth and can't get it out without help

#i think he saw me #but i'm not getting anywhere near those teeth #i'm not risking my arm to help the guy who chewed up my bike once #besides #i was in a hurry #the riddler really doesn't like it when he gets his food delivered late #i think someone helped him eventually tho #or he just got it out by himself #at least he wasn't in the alley on my way back #king shark #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

gotham finally has (regular) electricity again and i feel like we've really missed out on a lot while basically being cut off from the rest of the world

#this time it lasted way longer than usual #but at least it didn't happen in winter this time #no electricity is much easier to deal with #when you're not literally freezing #and when the sun at least comes out occasionally #on another note #i heard that crime went down while the power was out #probably because most of those silly schemes require way too much energy #and because batman seemed to be exempt from the whole no electricity thing #poison ivy probably had a great time tho #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

the power is still out but at least at this point it's pretty clear that it's not for any supernatural reasons because most of the backup generators work

#still weird tho #we don't get the sun here most of the time #so more or less the only lights are from lamps or neon signs and stuff like that #and now most of them are out #so it's just really dark all the time #even by gotham standards i mean #doesn't exactly make school easier #when you can't see anything #but i guess that's gotham for you #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

ok but why did the power just go out in the entire city?

#sometimes i really hate living in gotham #the worst part is #that there is no way of knowing when it'll come back #or why it happened #could be just a regular blackout #or some evil plot by a costumed idiot #or a curse #or even a full nuclear meltdown #and all of that would be completely normal #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

so i have two bosses and they're currently fighting about if we should keep delivering food to the joker because he never tips and always threatens the drivers (at least two have already gone missing after bringing him food) but he might try to get revenge if we blacklist him

#i kind of hope they do it #it's always super scary to deliver to him #and he's extremely rude #plus sometimes he just doesn't pay at all #one time he even robbed me #and he's already kidnapped me three separate times this year alone #besides #both the riddler and the penguin have strongly implied that they would help us #if he actually tries anything #i don't think they like him either #the joker #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

i think man bat and killer croc are still a bit crazy from the eclipse because from what i've heard, they've both bitten at least ten people each today alone, which is way above average for them

#not sure how that works #but it's the only explanation i can think of #i guess they're just crazy #i'm honestly surprised they even noticed #neither of them is usually out and about while the sun is still up #killer croc #man bat #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

btw yesterday's eclipse was absolutely insane for anyone in gotham, i'm pretty sure i still only know about half of what happened:

man bat apparently turned into a normal person, but only while the eclipse lasted, then he turned back into a bat-creature

multiple people independently of each other thought that it would be entirely dark so they could rob a bunch of different places without being seen, obviously it didn't work

the sky cleared up only long enough to see the eclipse and then came back immediately once it was over

someone hacked into every public screen in the city and played the entire eclipse movie (the twilight one), we're pretty sure it was harley quinn

according to rumors, superman fell from the sky over gotham harbor and batman had to catch him

#there is lots more stuff #but i can't list all of it right now #i'm sure there's other people talking about it too #man bat #eclipse #twilight #batman #superman #harley quinn #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

i just watched one of the robins (i still can't really tell them apart but i'm pretty sure it was one of the middle ones) run face-first into the only streetlamp around

#he bounced off it #and took a few steps back #and then he fell down #and just got back up #and kept running #it looked really funny #but i'm also kind of worried that he got a concussion #he probably shouldn't have just kept going like that #the robins #robin #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

just a quick warning, i think condiment king is planning something big

#i haven't been able to get mustard for three days now #and i checked at least 10 different stores #i'm sure it's him #it's actually kind of scary #what is he up to?#why does he need so much mustard?#condiment king #just gotham city things #only in gotham #unreality

ok but what's happening with the riddler lately? he looks completely different every time i see him

#and i run into him at least once a month #i know that it's him #i know what his face looks like by now #but he keeps changing #sometimes he's really buff #and then he's back to scrawny again the next time i see him #that can't possibly be healthy #the riddler #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

if you see someone selling a roughly palm-sized piece of batman's cape online, DON'T BUY IT!!! it's a fake made by my neighbor and it's literally just a piece of an old shirt, i saw him cut it up and take the pictures

#he's always trying to scam people #he doesn't even really need the money #he just likes tricking people #really not a cool guy #just don't fall for it #batman #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

one of my friends keeps trying to convince me to join his roller derby team and that would all sound fun as well but they regularly have to go up against the team harley quinn fights on and i heard that she tends to get really violent during matches

#there is even a rumor she killed a kid once #just because he was in the way #and there are so many broken bones #no thank you #that's not for me #roller derby #harley quinn #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

btw it really pays off to be nice to stray cats in gotham (and not just because they're really cute and stuff) because i always pet them and sometimes give them little treats and now catwoman keeps leaving (probably stolen but who cares) money and jewelry and stuff in my apartment when she uses it as a shortcut (she does that a lot) because it's pretty obvious that we're kind of poor

#she's actually really nice #even if i don't really know her #she never even breaks the windows to get in or out #just picks the locks and closes them again after #plus #she's kind of like robin hood #one time she even left snacks #and enough money to pay rent for three months #which was really great of her #because we keep having to pay hospital bills #because we live in gotham #catwoman #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

i think scarecrow messed up his most recent batch of fear gas because i just got hit in the face and i'm not even remotely scared, just really tired

#he seemed really surprised #when i didn't start crying or screaming #but i guess i would have been too #if i thought i was scaring someone #and they just yawned in my face instead #scarecrow #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

turns out that the days of endless sunshine were because the weather wizard was hiding out in our sewers (just like everyone else) and he didn't like the constant darkness and rain

#he just confessed to it #it was on the news and everything #i guess batman caught him #and asked him why #before arresting him #it's all very weird #and kind of funny #i'm glad it's dark again tho #the constant sun was starting to give me a headache #weather wizard #only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

not sure how but i'm pretty sure it's even sunny at night now, which is really confusing but not nearly as annoying as when the joker played that annoying music because at least i have blackout curtains

#the main problem for me #is that it's getting really warm #but one of my classmates didn't come to school today #because she got so sunburnt that she had to stay home #there are three or four kids #who moved here #and they all seem to be happy #but everyone else is miserable #it's all very strange #is this what people in other cities feel like?#only in gotham #just gotham city things #unreality

anormalkidingotham

i'm kind of worried because it has been sunny all day and that literally never happens in gotham

anormalkidingotham

it's day three of sunshine now and i think i'm starting to really feel the effects, in a bad way

#i am severely sunburnt #and i barely ever go outside #sunglasses are sold out everywhere #and so is sunscreen #people are really starting to panic #and we still don't know why this is happening #it was kind of nice at first #but now i'm really starting to get scared #and not just because this is clearly someone's evil plan #but also because there are way more traffic accidents now #because drivers keep getting distracted by the sun #just gotham city things #only in gotham #unreality

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just a normal kid trying to live in gotham