My chest hurts again. I feel so just. Awful. And I can't say it as I'm feeling it because of what? Some bullshit trauma stuff?
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@anotherblogforborderlines
My chest hurts again. I feel so just. Awful. And I can't say it as I'm feeling it because of what? Some bullshit trauma stuff?
i dont know what it is that makes me feel weird about asking to be included. ugh
the real truth is sometimes all u can do is breathe in and out ur nose.
Sometimes I hope that of we ever part (god forbid), I won't be someone you remember with disdain.
I'm sorry I'm like this.
It's really stupid to think you'd come check on me. Why would you, honestly?
One of the things I hate most about abuse is the whiplash of when they go completely “back to normal” and act like nothing happened. Like they didn’t do or say what they did. It makes it so hard not to fall back into fawning out of survival. It feels so gross.
To whom it may concern: people who have grown up emotionally neglected often end up in situations where they give 100% for a person (friend, partner) without realizing that they get very little in return. Oftentimes, that other person is the one walking out.
The true but hurtful stuff my therapist says
! This is your reminder that for some people healing doesnt mean being happy, it means being sad and angry and cringe and everything they f*ucking want. Its about yourselve and not about your productivity or performance ¡
tfw you’ve been dehumanized so deeply that you never feel like a person
call it a reflex
Half of problems with having cptsd and chronic fatigue is that you can't do things, can't get out of bed, can't be out and about, can't get things done, and it makes you feel so guilty you want to disappear. And then you have to find a way to live around that. And deal with the psychological devastation, and feel alone, sad and ashamed the entire time you're doing it.
NIGHTMARE EYES
Being a traumatized autistic person means you’re just waiting for every single person in your life to eventually turn on you once you become “too difficult”, “too sensitive”, and “too annoying”. There’s an acceptable level of your traits but once it surpasses a certain point, people want nothing to do with you anymore