Literally anti-prat kitty but humanized

The name is a pun on my name- (Anthony)

[sagegreenyaps]

When you hear stories of people changing to be less bigoted, it very often isn't because people hated them. It's because somebody extended a hand to them and helped them to take down their walls.

Remember this.

And if you've never heard any of those sort of stories... go find them. I promise, they are out there.

People change. Yes, sometimes for the worse, but other times for the better.

[antiradqueerguy]

Love /sarc that there's just casual nsfw/nsft posts in the radqueer tag, like I'm not a radqueer whatever,

But atleast recognize that there are still children under 13 in the community (as shown on this chart) and a large majority are 13-18,

[anti-rq-gumi]

None of them are tagged properly either. It would be fine if they were tagged with radqueer if they were also tagged with nsfw or the types of acts being described, or even if they had community labels on them. But no, they’re just there.

[anti-hony]

I saw some radqueers saw how unconfortable it made them feel too! Trying to create its own tag for it, but people just did not listen/it didnt get too many eyes on it.

[antiradqueerguy]

Love /sarc that there's just casual nsfw/nsft posts in the radqueer tag, like I'm not a radqueer whatever,

But atleast recognize that there are still children under 13 in the community (as shown on this chart) and a large majority are 13-18,

[gender-mailman]

I hate hate hate when radqueers say the paraphilias arent just sexual or romantic atractions.

A paraphilia LITERALLY means you have a SEXUAL OR ROMANTIC ATRACTION that its weird/unusual, wich is also was homosexuality was considered one

If thats the case, anyone who tends to only have platonic or familial atraction with kids is a pedophile i guess.

[anti-rq-gumi]

radqueers saying "antis putting dnis on a flag is stupid, you can't gatekeep a gender :/" and then being like "umm.. transid creators have rights to boundaries.... you can't recoin transids as desirdae terms if the creators don't want you to!!" is so telling

Right???

Term coiners have boundaries that should be respected no matter what community they’re a part of. At the same time, those boundaries don’t extend to terms other people have coined. It’s not that difficult a concept to grasp.

[apocynaceaeoleander-deactivated]

i try really hard to be understanding and open minded of most people & things but radqueer shit just.. doesnt make sense. i cant even find a pattern of logic as to why so many people fall into the community.

rant below cut, i hate most discourse but i keep thinking abt this and its bugging me.

why are people making whole ass identities and terms for shit like perma____, feeling you should be some arbitrary thing permanently. trans____, and the justification for it is that its the same to being transgender. gender is a social construct, sex is based upon biology. gender is pretty much nothing without gender roles, and gender roles are often limiting and harmful. how the fuck is being transracial or transautistic similar to that? you cant transition to being autistic because disability simply doesnt work that way. it is possible to modify your appearance to look more like another race, but like... why. how do you transition into another race without reinforcing racist stereotypes?

are transids just like.. a massive cope or something? that sounds harsh but i cant see why else you'd want a shit ton of labels for feelings of what you "should have been" or wish you were.

personally i think its stupid to label yourself based upon what you wish you could be. if you want to be something go be it, go do it. ive seen labels like "transpsychedelicuser" BRO JUST DO FUCKING SHROOMS. if you cant uhh.. cope???? why do you need a whole ass label for it, what is so amazing about drug use to where you need a term and fancy flag for it, and thats only one example.

im not against people hoarding labels, idc if people use xenogenders, but this just seems pointless and dumb. maybe im a party pooper & no fun, idk. this shit doesnt make sense even to me

[anti-rq-gumi]

This is not a reasonable boundary to set. And I’m going to explain why.

(Plain text: I have no DNI, but I am a radqueer! Hate will be deleted and ignored!

Do not recoin this [transID] label as desirdae, arissomei, or dissomei! Anti-radqueers may use this label as is!)

You cannot restrict peoples’ abilities to coin dissomei and desirdae subterms, just by creating a transID.

If someone makes a dissomei or desirdae version of a transID, even if it’s your transID that you coined specifically, they aren’t copying the term. TransID and its alternatives are not the exact same. They have fundamentally different definitions. Anti radqueers and non radqueers are allowed to use their own terms that describe their own atypical dysphoria without connection to the transID label.

You can restrict who’s allowed to use your terms, but you can’t restrict people from using anything other than your terms. That’s ridiculous.

@/kiruliom is the owner of dissomei after @/acetrappolaswife transferred ownership, and @/ghosting-plural-userboxes is coiner of desirdae. These are the only people who can restrict the terms’ usage. I encourage radqueers to communicate with them directly if they would like something changed instead of doing this.

[ex-rq-infirmary]

Your blogs aren’t being deleted because you’re being oppressed.

Your blogs are being deleted because you pose an actual threat to children who use this site.

[pervvette]

notice how my pro-c youthlib post got me termed, and any positive pro-c post ive made has gotten me termed

its almost like you guys dont actually have rebuttals to why being pro-c is bad so you just mass report me to try and shut me up.... hmmm... its almost like you hate the idea of a minor talking about how theyre able to consent and want to be treated as such...

[anti-rq-gumi]

This is so funny to read. My most recent post clearly explained that saying "youthlib is inherently pro-c" would put you at odds with the entire youth liberation tag. And again here's someone in radqueer spaces who replied to you with a solid rebuttal.

Your blog was terminated because you broke Tumblr's TOS!

Notice the last part? "Promotion of child sexual abuse"? That's what your pro-c youthlib posts have been doing. It's almost like you don't actually have any backing for your claims... hmm... it's almost like you hate the idea of your actions having consequences...

Also you're probably gonna get terminated again for this post so have fun with that lol

[pervvette]

you love riding my dick dont you buddy

[anti-hony]

Just saying it again since i think you didnt hear it when my friend said it:

It's almost like you don't actually have any backing for your claims... hmm... it's almost like you hate the idea of your actions having consequences...

[It's almost like you don't actually have any backing for your claims... hmm... it's almost like you hate the idea of your actions having consequences...]

If youre going to make a post like that then be prepared to actually DEBAITE your opnion AT LEAST

[pervvette]

are you dumb on purpose or dumb on accident

also you spelt debate wrong

[anti-hony]

Oh im sorry i didnt saw youre bfs post about you on your own opnion on stuff, and also, again, if you dont really care/dont take discourse seriously, then dont post stuff like that??

Youre literally the one thats calling for people to LITERALLY debate you, YOURE the one that said "its almost like you guys dont actually have rebuttal to why being pro-c is bad" but when someone actually REBUTS you, you act like this.

Then dont fucking complain about not seeing people rebut you if you literally do not fucking care.

Also, thx, english its not my first language /gen

[pervvette]

notice how my pro-c youthlib post got me termed, and any positive pro-c post ive made has gotten me termed

its almost like you guys dont actually have rebuttals to why being pro-c is bad so you just mass report me to try and shut me up.... hmmm... its almost like you hate the idea of a minor talking about how theyre able to consent and want to be treated as such...

[anti-rq-gumi]

This is so funny to read. My most recent post clearly explained that saying "youthlib is inherently pro-c" would put you at odds with the entire youth liberation tag. And again here's someone in radqueer spaces who replied to you with a solid rebuttal.

Your blog was terminated because you broke Tumblr's TOS!

Notice the last part? "Promotion of child sexual abuse"? That's what your pro-c youthlib posts have been doing. It's almost like you don't actually have any backing for your claims... hmm... it's almost like you hate the idea of your actions having consequences...

Also you're probably gonna get terminated again for this post so have fun with that lol

[pervvette]

you love riding my dick dont you buddy

[anti-hony]

Just saying it again since i think you didnt hear it when my friend said it:

It's almost like you don't actually have any backing for your claims... hmm... it's almost like you hate the idea of your actions having consequences...

[It's almost like you don't actually have any backing for your claims... hmm... it's almost like you hate the idea of your actions having consequences...]

If youre going to make a post like that then be prepared to actually DEBAITE your opnion AT LEAST

[antiradqueef]

i am not the one of us who usually posts here, but i have something to say.

while x personality disorder abuse does not exist, this does not mean people with x personality disorder cannot be abusers. furthermore, it does not mean you should excuse their actions because of this disorder.

there have been many times where i have been in a harmful/abusive relationship to me and i excused it because "oh they have aspd" "oh they have bpd". abuse is, under no circumstances, excusable.

making excuses like this also furthers the stigma against personality disorders. personality disorders do not make you abuse people, and excusing someones abuse of you because they have a personality disorder goes directly against that. please stay safe.

[anti-rq-gumi]

Hi. Ex-radqueer again. Sorry if I keep bothering you. I’m struggling understanding why transautistic and similar terms are wrong.

I’m autistic. I’ve been diagnosed since age 5. I’m very visibly autistic in interactions with me, and as a result I have been ostracized my entire life. I have no friends, currently. I have only ever been asked out as a prank. I have never seen anyone “admire” my autism or see it as something to emulate. Until transautistics.

Radqueers told me that I should see transautistic people as a compliment. The idea that they wanted to be me. That they wanted to develop the traits that have haunted me my whole life. Without transautistics, I really am undesirable in all the world. My autistic traits are unwanted things.

I’m kind of struggling right now.

Hi again! You're not bothering me at all, don't worry!

Like you, I was suspected to be autistic since I was very young, though I didn't receive an actual diagnosis until much later at 17. While I accepted it I found it hard to think of in a positive light due to internalized ableism from my own experiences. More exposure to autistic people on the internet talking about it with pride was what helped me think of it differently.

Have you heard of the site Embrace Autism? It's full of resources for autistic and other neurodivergent people compiled by professionals who are neurodivergent themselves! It's an absolutely amazing read not only for autistic people but for those who suspect they might have autism and allies looking to support the community.

With that out of the way, I'll talk about the transautistic label a little bit. Wanting to be autistic is not a bad thing. It's more of a neutral one. Whether or not transautistic people are ableist depends on how they choose to deal with their feelings.

If a transautistic person is autistic, and uses the label to describe how they want to unmask more and become more comfortable presenting as autistic around people, then that's great! They'll be fully accepted into the autistic community.

If a transautistic person feels like they are autistic, but don't know for sure if they meet its diagnostic criteria, they should do more research into the different ways autism can present and whether or not that applies to them. Informed self diagnosis is incredibly valid.

If a transautistic person is neurotypical, wants to have autism and doesn't intend to do anything about this besides simply researching what autism is like and supporting autistic people, then that's fine. I understand atypical dysphoria exists.

If a transautistic person is neurotypical, and wants to fake autism, that's... not okay. They more often than not will know about autistic stereotypes rather than symptoms. The consequences of their faking will be negative not only to themselves, but also to everyone around them's perception of autism.

If a transautistic person wants to 'transition to having autism' they need to be told they cannot do this. Autism is a neurodevelopmental disorder that manifests as a difference in brain structure from birth. It is impossible for a neurotypical person to become neurodivergent or vice versa. Attempts to do so only traumatize the individual in question. Suggesting anything to the contrary is extremely ableist.

Some radqueers claim that all transautistics belong in autistic spaces, which is just kind of inherently not true. Autistic people belong in autistic spaces. Transautistic autistics are accepted, and transautistic neurotypicals are expected to be respectful of a group they don't belong to.

All in all, there is pride to be found in being autistic! You aren't undesirable or unwanted for having that disorder. Many autistic people live happy and fulfilling lives. Using the transautistic label to express autistic pride is completely fine with me, and what I truly take issue with is neurotypical people using it as an excuse for ableism.

[anti-rq-gumi]

Hi. I’m an ex-radqueer working on leaving the community. Prior to leaving, I was in pro-c spaces and still hold a lot of pro-c views.

I am a legal minor. Gah, I hate that term. I have a mental countdown until I will no longer be. When I can have freedom and choices. I used to fantasize (still do, I know it’s wrong) about my parents dying in a car accident or something. Because it would free me from them. My dream is of a world where there is no such thing as a minor. Where people don’t have to wait 18 years for their human rights. I found the youthlib community as an anti-c radqueer, and they inspired me to join pro-c spaces. Because if I believed that children should have all these other rights, why didn’t I believe they could consent? In pro-c spaces, there was no distinction between adults and minors. No one was required to give their age. I was not constantly reminded of my lesser status.

I left radqueer spaces after seeing what was essentially encouraging self-harm. But I still have some of my beliefs. And I don’t know what to do.

I actually empathize with you a lot.

When I was a minor I had no idea radqueers existed and no contact with their spaces, but I remember feeling inferior due to being a child or a teen like how you’re describing. This was mostly because teachers in my school system would be cruel to their students and not respect them as people. I waited a long time to escape a particularly abusive situation, all the while fantasizing about murdering someone or blowing up the building, which I didn’t really want to do — it was a manifestation of how powerless I felt at the time and how I wished I could do something about it. Believe me when I say I don’t see you as a terrible person. Just as someone badly affected.

The reason there’s such a strong divider between minors and adults is because minors are generally vulnerable in a way adults aren’t. They’re emotionally, financially and physically dependent on their guardians. The distinction is necessary to protect them. It is sadly often taken advantage of by some adults to do the opposite but there is solid backing for why it exists in the first place.

Minors cannot consent to adults because adults are in a position of power over them. It’s the same reason an employee cannot consent to their boss in the workplace. The laws forbidding these types of relationships protect those at risk rather than disenfranchising them further. As a minor, and as a person, you have the right not to be taken advantage of.

Minors can consent to other minors around the same age as them. There is no power disparity there.

Youth liberation is a movement on its own that radqueers tried to co-opt to further abuse. I highly, highly recommend you look into its non radqueer version. Having more rights as a minor and being protected from harm are both major elements. I am all for minors being respected and treated like people. And like anyone else I don’t want them to be abused. I hope this was helpful.

[yourl0calanti]

Antiship,proship, radqueer, anti radqueer, etc, are all terms to talk about basic ideas. It doesn't mean you have to hate everything from another idea. Proshippers can be uncomfortable with ageplay, anti-rq's don't have to hate Trans-IDS, normalize not being an extremity and normalize not naming yourself any internet label at all.

(proshippers and radqueers are welcome to reblog and like and comment on this post)

[antiradqueerguy]

Report them, they are a kid selling nudes online.

Yeah see this is somehow very common in the radqueer community /NEG,

REPORT AND BLOCK, DO NOT HARASS!!!

[recovering-radqueers]

Myths about self-care graphic by Mymindoasis.com

Text from the blog post under the cut:

Self-care is NOT an indulgence

While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with indulging or pampering yourself once in a while, there is more to self-care than bubble baths and face-masks. It is easy to trivialise and write-off self-care by focusing only on the indulgence. Meaningful self-care involves not just the easy, fun things. More importantly, it includes making mindful changes in patterns of thoughts and behaviours that do not contribute to your wellbeing. For instance, saying no without feeling guilty, knowing when to take a break or avoiding harmful coping mechanisms.

Self-care is NOT selfish

Brené Brown, in her book The Gifts of Imperfection writes: “In a society that says, “Put yourself last,” self-love and self acceptance are almost revolutionary.”  Self-care is not a disregard for others’ needs. It is extending the same concern and empathy for your needs that you offer others. Practicing self-care by enforcing healthy boundaries and communicating your needs is not only essential for yourself, but also makes you more available for those around you. When you make time for yourself and get sufficient rest & exercise, you feel more energetic and will be able to do more - for yourself as well as for those around you.

Self-care is NOT a one-time experience

Going on a spa day and treating yourself poorly for the rest of the week is not self care! Looking after your most basic physical and emotional needs is not a one-time luxury. It is an ongoing practice in building resilience to face hardships and in preventing burnout. To put it simply, self-care is not optional! To make the most out of self-care, it is essential to have a regular practice that is a part of your life and not something you try only when you are about to have a breakdown.

Self-care is NOT time consuming

So many people around me – including friends, family and clients, insist: “I just don’t have the time for it!” Despite acknowledging the benefits and necessity of self-care, some people refrain from making it a practice. Given how busy everyone is these days, it is understandable that you hesitate to commit your time. However, I want you to know that self-care does not require you to take out a huge chunk of time from your busy day. Self-care is practicing loving kindness towards yourself, every day, all the time.  

What does it mean to have a regular self-care practice?

Having a self-care practice means that you choose to explore your needs through regular reflection and make appropriate changes to meet these needs. Becoming aware of your needs (which include multiple facets such as mind, body, relationships) is the first step in learning to make self-care a priority. Simple practices such as journaling, meditation, mindfulness and a number of other creative ways can help you begin this reflection. Setting aside a few minutes everyday – perhaps just before going to bed or having a meal – goes a long way in staying committed to the practice and making it an integral part of your life.

In addition to the time you set aside for reflection, prioritising self-care includes:

Accepting that it’s OK to have needs

Allowing yourself to be tired

Allowing yourself to make mistakes

Looking after your body by nourishing it and including some form of physical movement in your routine

Giving yourself the room to practice healthy boundaries

Expressing yourself clearly and without guilt

Staying connected with people, places and activities that make you feel good

Making room for regular self-care in your life has a number of benefits. It helps to build resilience, prevents burnout, promotes healthier relationships and makes you more productive.

How to create a sustainable self-care plan?

Self-care is essential for a wholesome, balanced life. Since self-care is an ongoing practice, you need to work on a plan that is sustainable in the long run.

Start small

You don’t have to make sweeping or overwhelming changes to start practicing self-care. Start with small changes and additions to your routine. If setting aside 30 minutes every day seems impossible right now, try beginning with 10 minutes for the first week and gradually increase. Remember, self-care is less about what you do and more about how you treat yourself.

Experiment

Each person is different and has unique needs, so there is no one-size-fits-all plan that will work for everyone. To figure out which practices work best for you, try a variety of things. When you experiment, you will gain clarity about what fits your life and routine. Make a list of activities you find helpful.

Intentional practice

If you want to build a sustainable self-care plan, it is important to be actively engaged in the practices you try. Pay attention to how it makes you feel. What is the outcome? What do you like/dislike about it?

Here are some suggestions to get you started with a self-care plan:

Pause and check-in with yourself before getting out of bed

Practice slow, deep breathing

Start writing a journal

Create something (draw, paint, cook, sculpt, collage)

Stretch when you take a break

Put your phone/tablet away for an hour

Take a walk

Call a friend

Drink lots of water

Get enough sleep

Practice saying no

Reconnect with a hobby

Spend time outdoors

Follow a guided meditation

Join a support group

Make a gratitude list

Look for opportunities to laugh

Read a book

Visit your doctor for a check-up

Plan going out with friends/family

if you need step-by-step instructions on how to do any of these things above, send us an ask here and we'll help! -mod charlie

[recoverymatters222-archived]

Hello!

Would you like to see a recovery post based on your experience?

We're open to asks and requests!

We will do:

Personalized promotion and positivity, as well as advice to leave groups.

Helping promote labels that are like transID that do not support harmful transitioning.

Emoji combinations for any which experience that we don't already have. (ex, ex-lolicon, ex-transharmed, etc) Can be as specific as you'd like!

We want everyone recovering from being in these groups to feel safe and included as they branch into moving on.