Michel || It/Gut

Bodily 22 || USA || AuDHD, NPD, BPD

[anti-willo-canada]

Quick intro post until I have time

This blog is run by a Countryhumans Canada introject, but others in the system may post. I go by the name Michel and use It/They/He/Axe/Blood/Gut pronouns. I am a persecutor and anger holder in a system with heavily suspected NPD and BPD, so I may be more aggressive in my posts, but I know when to take myself from a situation.

I am anti endo, willo, tulpa, polymind, radqueer, transid, racist, homophobic etc. You can try all you want, but you won't change my mind.

This blog was made FOR FUN. I will mostly post to have fun, but I don't care if someone comes in my ask box asking questions. I will answer if I want to

Tag List

#main speaker = Michel

#guest speaker = Literally everybody else

#mailbox = Asks

[anti-willo-canada]

Been obsessed over MW3 reboot and have been playing it constantly. Maybe I am diseased 😓😓😓😓😓

[anti-willo-canada]

Just got some fucking transmed talking points translated into therian shit on my dash. You're literally only replacing the words man/woman/trans with therian its literally transmed talking points get the fuck off my dash omfg. I've had a shit day and then I get that. I'm putting tumblr down for the day I think

[anti-willo-canada]

AWV lwk getting nuked, but this account and Nikolai's are still gonna be up as our more open as a system centered and for his own personal blog to yap in. The names will probably remain the same, but that's tbd

[anti-willo-canada]

And before I forget, PDs are disabling too. Our BPD and NPD disable us. Love to everyone suffering from a personality disorder

[anti-willo-canada]

Fuckers be mad because you say (literally backed up too) you can't be a system without trauma and then call YOU disrespectful when you go "hey stop pretending to be a fucking system, stop harassing systems and trauma survivors, and stop indoctrinating and grooming people into believing they are systems when they aren't." Like idk man maybe what you're doing is disrespectful, but what do I know

ID: Blank white background with a picture of a Perry the Platypus plush on it. Text reads I can't fucking do be do be do it anymore /END ID

[anti-willo-canada]

I love being an anger holder and persecutor because I get so fucking angry and filled with rage I just shut off any feeling of hunger until hours later when I've calmed down enough that my body decides to punch me in the mouth with hunger and my stomach fucking hurts because we haven't eaten all day

[anti-willo-canada]

I hope every (pro) endo gets smited this disability pride month for being ableist pieces of shit and not pure of heart

[anti-willo-canada]

First off happy 4th of July to every fellow American, but also please please please keep any headphones and earbuds charged up. I know for many of us, neighbors have already been setting off fireworks a day or 2 before, but still. Make sure if you're affected by loud noises to keep headphones and earbuds on hand and charged up if you can. If you have airpods, absolutely use both for the noise canceling feature. Play your favorite music or YouTube video. Watch a movie you find comforting. Eat your favorite snacks and drink water. Just stay safe and we love you!

[heartbloom-manor]

“DID needs childhood trauma to have formed”

Yes, but also

“What is traumatic to a child may not seem traumatic to an adult”

A kids brain has no logbook comparing their stress to someone else’s. All it knows is that it’s under severe stress.

[anti-willo-canada]

Canada! Post! uwu

UwU!!

[thee-butcherbirds]

Saying "people before labels" in reference to "syscourse" is downplaying the harm that (pro) endogenics do by spreading shit tons of misinformation about CDDs and blatant ableism and saneism.

It's gross and clearly just shows that you're not putting people with CDDs before ableists.

That saying is performative as fuck, "plualpunk" my ass

— [ 🪒 ] Tidal it/fae/fog

[anti-willo-canada]

Piping hot take to kick off this disability pride month, but being a system is a disability and a disorder. It disorders you and fucks you over. It disables you. You cannot be a system and non-disordered, you can only work to minimize how badly it does disorder and disables you. Happy Disability Pride month and don't let the posers get you down this month

[anti-willo-miku]

Endos have demedicalized cdds so much in their head that even symptoms of the disorder make you an endo. I’m so tired of people claiming CDD systems real symptoms are proof of being an endo. You are an idiot who doesn’t know how the damn disorder works.

PT: An ask that reads: my hot take is a loooot of antis have endo n willo headmates. they dont know it but they do. a guy might just show up due to something mildly stressful but not traumatic, guess what? ENDO. OOOOOH SCARY. /END ID

[caution-of-mawl]

"mildly stressful" is also stress. stress = reason to split an alter, especially for systems with lower split tolerance...

it doesnt need trauma for alters to split, alters can even split for positive stress reasons... that doesnt make anyone an endo or a willo... these people really have no idea how these things work but then claim they have any idea whatsoever, its pathetic hahaha...

[sayoris-yapping-corner]

it’s been said before but endos don’t really understand that the “big” trauma is just needed for the initial disorder to form. It’s just needed to for the initial disruption in development (the emotional states failing to integrate, as a result of trauma / highly dissociated ANPs and EPs).

Anything after that doesn’t require as much. Your brain has already developed an extreme tool / coping mechanism, so it’s going to use it!

But also.. why are they undermining stress here? Like.. stress is notoriously bad for you.

[anti-willo-canada]

Playing Hindsight wish me luck. And if I cry, I'm switching to BOCW idc

[anti-willo-canada]

I think there's something fucking cruel and hilarious about being recommended antiendosoap's "be more positive about source attached alters" post after I literally cried my eyes out over the hindsight mission. I couldn't even start it because as soon as I saw Erikson I closed the fucking game and sobbed for an hour

[anti-willo-canada]

Blah blah same topic and source vent posting but I wish I wasn't fucking shrodingers source attached alter. I can play mw2 22 just fine and treat it as the video game it is UNTIL Hindsight. I cannot touch that mission, no one else can and it can just barely be reference around us or else I get insanely upset and I wish I wouldn't. It's tiring. It wasn't even a minute into the mission when I looked over at Erikson and immediately shut it down because I started crying. It is tiring having such intense emotions because that is literally me and that is literally my partners and my best friends. I miss them and I fucking hate it. I miss Erikson and I miss Vance. Fuck. I want to be able to play that mission as the video game it is goddammit

[anti-willo-canada]

I think there's something fucking cruel and hilarious about being recommended antiendosoap's "be more positive about source attached alters" post after I literally cried my eyes out over the hindsight mission. I couldn't even start it because as soon as I saw Erikson I closed the fucking game and sobbed for an hour