Changed my blog url from anti-willo-sayori to this, btw! (The url might change a few more times, after this, too.)
We enjoyed being a part of the anti-willoverse for most of the ride but with the recent.. well, everything, we’ve decided to change our url. (We didn’t want to deactivate the blog since it’s something we genuinely got attached to, and we have a lot of content we don’t want to be lost to time.)
We may still make anti-willo posts, in the future, but the blog will likely shift to being something more general system-related. :3
To expand more on this decision, the anti-willoverse feels like it’s becoming more of a “morality Olympics” community, than anything else. It’s full of black-and-white no-nuance thinking, demonization, and harassment.. and, as more people leave, it’s only becoming worse. It’s just.. horrible for our moral anxiety / maybe OCD.
It’s really been tanking our mental health recently, and with everything else going on in our real life.. it’s either we step away or follow in Sayori’s footsteps. And we have things we still need to live for.
Changed my blog url from anti-willo-sayori to this, btw! (The url might change a few more times, after this, too.)
We enjoyed being a part of the anti-willoverse for most of the ride but with the recent.. well, everything, we’ve decided to change our url. (We didn’t want to deactivate the blog since it’s something we genuinely got attached to, and we have a lot of content we don’t want to be lost to time.)
We may still make anti-willo posts, in the future, but the blog will likely shift to being something more general system-related. :3
Reminder that while Fukase is Anti-Radqueer, he is very uncomfortable with the ideas spread that it's ok to inflict violence on Radqueers!!
Majority of the community is people who were groomed, manipulated, and underaged, and either way it's a little jarring to see those gifs of hanging Radqueers, because they're also human. While he may not agree with them and hold some grudges, he would not wish genuine death or violence upon them
- causing you to harass, threaten or belittle others on the other side
- interfering with any important responsibilities you may have (job, school, etc)
That is your sign to step away from it. It is not a big deal, and is it not “the other side winning,” even if they may talk about it like it is. You are allowed to distance yourself from discourse because consistent involvement in it is never going to end well.
I fundamentally disagree with you on endos but you're one of the few vocal anti endos I respect. Most people would rather shy away from calling out ableism in their own spaces.
I want my own space to be better, just as I assume you want yours to be.
I have my issues with a lot behavior in of anti-endo spaces. A lot of these also occur with pro endo spaces, i have no doubt about that, but this is what I’ve noticed, and I think people will be more receptive to me saying it than a pro-endo or an endogenic plural:
— Ableism issues
— Toxicity and lashing out at each other (I understand that due to the nature of a large number of trauma survivors clustered together + an emotionally charged topic that’s bound to happen but we should be more conscious about it)
— Misinformation / misrepresenting of arguments. (No, all endos aren’t claiming to have CDDs without trauma. That is a very small minority. Do not put words in their mouth, we have enough ammo against them already)
— Treating pro endo cdd systems like endos. A shitty opinion doesn’t change somebodies diagnosis.
These a criticisms that I (an alter who is more “endo critical” than “anti endo”) have even brought up to members of my own system.
Now, and this is going to sound very harsh, I think some of these issues are becoming glaringly obvious partially due to the large influx in anti-willo blank blogs. Like I said previously, it’s a bunch of people who are (mostly) pwcdds aka trauma survivors and on the younger side centered around emotionally charged topic. It’s not going to be good for anybodies mental health to be actively doing that consistently.
I don’t think anybody should be pressured to keep these blogs, as if I’m being honest it was inevitable for a sort of fall-out once the whole thing kind of snowballed out of my control and into a whole community. (Endos also shouldn’t take this as a “you won” statement from me, btw. The poor mental health of traumatized people is not and should not be a win for your community) Don’t get me wrong, I think a lot of good stuff and resources have come out of it, but at the same time at the end of the day it’s still system discourse, and having a bunch of people participating in fighting or discourse as a trend of sorts was never going to end well for anybodies mental health, even if what we’re fighting against has done objective harm.
Okay wow that was a ramble #myramble
(This isn’t about any specific situation, just something I’ve honestly been thinking about since the beginning)
i do feel like i have some hand in this because me making a parody of another blogs url kind of spiraled things out of control somehow 😭 and to that im sorry
I wouldn’t say it’s your fault? If we wanna play the blame game, you can point it at everybody.
Not to mention, if you hadn’t made the parody blog first then someone else probably would’ve, and there’s a chance this community still would’ve been born.
Maybe unpopular opinion but I kinda want any and all DID education to stop focusing on the rarity of things and start focusing on the mistreatment of us as trauma survivors...
Introjects with problematic sources are valid. whether they are;
factives of problematic people
factives of abusers
fictives of canonically bad people
fictives from problematic media
fictives from media with a problematic creator
You are not inherently bad due to your source. Whether you hide your source or not. It does not make you bad. Your source's actions do not define you. Whether you detach or not is frankly your business. I nor anybody else can force others to do anything. But as long as you are trying to/are willing to heal, I support you.
Feeling awkward about your source is 100% valid. We have experienced that. But try not to let your source burden you in any way. You are so much more than it <3
The 4th of July brings sudden noises and flashing lights that can bring distress to people with disabilities and/or pets! These are my tips to you as someone with PTSD/autism and anxious pets.
The end part is seizure first aid and how to handle someone else having a seizure if you are nearby!
♿️ People with Disabilities ! (e.g; PTSD, anxiety, epilepsy)
- Try to pinpoint exactly when and where fireworks will occur in your area, this is to eliminate a "startle" factor. If your neighbors set off fireworks, prepare at least an hour before 8pm. People start setting fireworks off at around 9pm to 10pm ; probably longer because they don't necessarily consider us or pets nearby until an officer stops them.
- Sensory blocking is KEY!!!! Headphones, TV, shutting the blinds, or hiding out in the bathroom works too.
- Keep any medications nearby! Melatonin, panic attack medications, and so forth. They may be needed.
- Try to have doctors or trusted people on speed dial if possible. Seizures, panic attacks, and other conditions may require medical attention.
- Grounding techniques are your best friend. Try to engage your senses in the moment, whether it be taste, smell, touch, and so forth.
- Hydration and nutrition helps!!!! Even if you feel that sinking feeling or you're going out to a firework show; drink plenty of water and keep snacks on you!
If you're like me and have a particular dislike towards the taste of water, I suggest flavored electrolyte water like Propel or Powerade! This will combat the summer heat and lower seizure/panic attack thresholds.
💚 For Friends, Family, or Neighbors of Disabled folks.
- Ask in advance about what triggers them, what the coping plan is, and how to help if they get overwhelmed. Most people with disabilities know their disability best!
- If you choose to light fireworks near their home, do try to keep them away from their area. Warn them via text, call, or quickly checking on them in person before starting so they aren't too startled by the sudden noise or flash.
- If you attend a public show, try to park your car in an easy-to-reach place and stay nearby. Make sure you're both on the same page around leaving if things get stressful.
🤍 Strangers
- If you see someone who appears distressed or overstimulated, ask calmly if there is anything you can do to help them in the moment! Respect their answer if they say no.
- If someone is experiencing a panic attack, sensory meltdown, or a seizure, keep crowds back! Give the person physical space and privacy from onlookers.
🐾 Pets with Disabilities
- Ensure you secure your environment. Try to keep them indoors, in cages, and/or in a space where they can't escape.
- Drown out the noise for them! Playing the TV, turning on a fan, or any other white noise to muddle the sounds of fireworks.
- It's common for pets run away on the 4th of July. Please make sure your pet has identification tags or a microchip, even if they don't normally wear a collar or get out.
- Pets cannot have medication meant for humans. Please speak to a vet about anxiety medications or calming pheromone diffusers. Some pet stores carry calming treats. Administer such medications at least an hour or 30 minutes before fireworks! Some anxious pets won't take the medication or treat if they're already going off!
🍖 Loose or Panicked Pets
- Keep a spare leash on you or a treat pouch in your car! This may help to secure loose pets without cornering them.
- Please be careful and approach lose pets with caution. Frightened animals may bite or scratch out of fear. Crouch, avoid eye contact, and speak softly. Do not offer hands or fingers for them to smell, but I suggest throwing treats in their direction to secure them.
- Check for identification. Collars or taking them to a local vet/shelter to scan for microchips.
- Post them on local boards! Taking a clear picture of pets and sharing them to community boards to find the owner (whether public or shelters).
SEIZURE FIRST AID.
The most critical rule of seizure first aid is to keep the person safe until the seizure stops naturally. Most seizures end on their own within a few minutes.
Stay with the person until the seizure ends and they are fully awake.
Move away sharp objects, hard furniture, or tight hazards.
If they are unconscious, roll them onto their side to keep their airway clear.
Note the exact start and end time of the active shaking.
Place something soft like a jacket or cushion under their head.
Undo buttons or ties around the neck to aid breathing.
Never hold the person down or try to stop their movements.
Never put anything in their mouth; it is anatomically impossible for the person to "swallow their tongue".
Speak softly and reassuringly to them as they regain consciousness.
"When should I call 911???"
The active seizure lasts longer than 5 minutes.
A second seizure begins right after the first one ends.
The person is injured, pregnant, or has an underlying health condition like diabetes.
The person struggles to breathe or does not wake up after shaking stops.
If the seizure happens in water or another dangerous environment.
The person has never had a known seizure before.
I am VERY anti-endo and it’s offshoots. But can we please, PLEASE support those who used to support and/or think they were endogenic before realizing that they had just forgotten their trauma or weren’t a system at all? When I was first learning about plurality, I ended up with several endogenic friends who convinced me that I was like them. I later ended up remembering more of my past and doing more research on the subject, and I have since revoked my support of them and cut those friends off.
It was a misunderstanding. I was younger, confused, scared, and I just wanted to feel like I had it all under control. My page is not welcome to current pro-endos, but it is very welcome to those who are now educated on the subject.
Thank you for coming to my ted talk.
This may be a lukewarm take, I don't know, and I know others have said this, but we really don't need an abundance of anti-radqueer labels that all mean the same thing.
Yes, I have my issues with the radnormal label, but even with those issues I disagree with the tactic of trying to replace it with something "better".
As much as you all might hate it, it's best to just leave them be. Making these labels, constantly posting about hating radqueers, even if it's true, just reinforces their world view. What we're doing is pushing vulnerable people deeper into harmful ideology. They talk about how "anti rqs are evil and will hate you" and we're proving that to them right now.
If you want people to be better, start by no longer feeding into what's keeping them in this harmful state.
What makes me really sad is when people say “I’m endogenic because my system formed from [insert thing] instead of trauma” and the thing in question is just… truama that isn’t commonly represented in the community. I hate the myth that you have the absolute worst most horrific things ever happen to develop a cdd. So many things can be traumatic, especially to a child.
Neglect can be traumatic, loneliness and isolation can be traumatic, bullying can be traumatic.
Combine that with other factors and a low stress tolerance and yeah, a system can form.
