So I got Officially Diagnosed™️ as autistic two days after my twenty second birthday and the change in people’s attitudes towards me was almost immediate.
Where I used to be “quirky” I was now “weird” and “not acting right”. Friends who previously used to turn to me for guidance and help for almost anything now began to treat me like a child and baby me to the point where it was actually said that I couldn’t be left alone to do anything by myself. I was no longer allowed to make decisions and things I had done before like stimming were now immediately shut down and stopped.
These were all things done by people my own age. People who I’d known for years and who I considered to be close friends. The second I mentioned I had an official diagnosis, everything changed. And it hurt. It hurt because the diagnosis that I hoped would help me actually made things so much worse.
People around me were made aware of my autism. But they didn’t accept it. To them it made me different. I was “other”.
I’d much rather be accepted than have people be aware of me. And now, as I see more and more posts on social media about autism awareness month, I can’t help but wonder what it is people want to be aware of. I can’t help wonder if they want to know who’s autistic simply so they can mark them out and make sure to treat them differently.
Neutotypicals, don’t be aware of autism. Please be accepting of it instead.
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