.. <- two ants kissing
No title available
Claire Keane
sheepfilms

pixel skylines
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

JBB: An Artblog!

⁂
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Misplaced Lens Cap
will byers stan first human second

if i look back, i am lost
tumblr dot com
🪼
Acquired Stardust

PR's Tumblrdome

Discoholic 🪩
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
wallacepolsom
No title available

seen from Türkiye

seen from Australia

seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Canada

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United Arab Emirates
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
@archangeloooo
.. <- two ants kissing
POV: Papa thought he heard you say your taint wasn’t tickled
I will NEVER see a prehistoric dinosaur
I will NEVER see an anomalocaris. I will NEVER hold a trilobite. I will NEVER see a dimetrodon or an eight foot long millipede. and I will NEVER see a pterosaur
Well as much as it pains me to say it they died
rly wanna crack an egg onto a photocopier n scan it jsut 2 see what happens
looks like an egg
A Chinese opera performer painting on a face (脸谱) for the ox zodiac.
Old people love to own two identical ugly as shit dogs
my brother’s grandma has been buying the exact same identical dog for like 60 years and naming each one boochie. I hate its immortal suffering.
WHWHAHAHAHAVEGEDHDHWHAHAHAHA
grandmas love to have complexes
Are we just ignoring the person that got hit by an electrical blast
She’s just doing it for attention
i had a thought today like man, my ancestors would probably not approve very much of me being such an extravagant glutton, but then i was like wtf are u kidding. those dumbasses didn’t live on a fuckin potato ass diet for no minimalism. they didn’t do what they did, whatever the fuck it was, for me NOT to fucking eat my bodyweight in sashimi!!! they would be fucking ecstatic to see me making the most of my opportunities for plenty. they would be fucking cheering me on. every lice-covered cossack and illiterate serf and three-toothed yak herder in my lineage is with me in this restaurant, and they are going absolutely apeshit watching me try to fit an entire samosa in my mouth
i love this idea that the ancestors are following modern people around like a rappers yes-man as we eat food #‘fucking superb you funky little descendant’
me, standing in front of the burger king counter like the blithering hunger gibbon i am: i’ll have… uhhh… double whopper with fries. thank you. large please
the 500 mongolian tatar and polish jew ghosts behind me: [ERUPT INTO WILD SCREAMING AND HIGH FIVES]
can you believe there is a painting of cossacks going hogwild out there that fits this situation perfectly
Someone: yeah it was so sad when this character died
Me, who’s already read 15 fix-it fics and no longer can tell the difference between canon and fanon: when they what
by @riowilddesign on IG
My three girlfriends. And yes, they smoke weed.
do they smoke weed?
Yes, actually.
you mean she isnt just smoking a cigarette? but a weed cigarette?
It’s called a bunt…. Not weed cigarette… And yes, it is a weed bunt. They all smoke weed bunts before we kiss. (They are my girlfriends,)
They don’t look like they smoke weed.
Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. Fuck You. I’m so angry you are so lucky my three weed smorking girlfriends are rubbing my shoulders to calm me down I’m so mad.
Your “weed smoking girlfriend” has a Hello Kitty tattoo on her belly. The one in the middle.
I printed out a photo of your avatar and taped it to my punching bag that I punch and I mutter your URL with every strong punch I punch you twerp…. Don’t ever Talk about Blaiz or the wicked Tat(tattoo) I drew on her ever again I Don’t wanna see you standing outside my home at 3 am holding your weird dripping brown bags ever again ok leave us alone this is the FINAL FUCKING WARNING
Well that escalated quickly……
What, was that? Hmm? Come again. *Blaiz grabs my shoulder* Come on Jory, they aren’t worth it, please. * I jerk my shoulder shaking her hand off* NO! NOOOOO!!! *starts to just pummel you with my big fucking fists. With each blow I let out a furious yell. The blows come quicker and harder and the yells get louder. I’m yelling so loud and now I’m crying. BREAKING POINT. The week was hard and I can’t take anymore. I’m opening sobbing at this point while you blood gurgle. All three of my girlfriends struggle to pull me off and they finally succeed and lead me away from the goo pile that is now your body*
haha oh my god
who even is this dude? someone needs some anger management classes.
love how he keeps reminding us that “I HAVE THREE GIRLFRIENDS”, “THEY ALL KISS ME”, and “THEY SMOKE WEED HURRP DURR”.
and let’s not forget the “Blaiz” and her “wicked tat”, or that he doesn’t “wanna see you standing outside [his] home at 3 am holding your weird dripping brown bags ever again”, and that this is “the FINAL FUCKING WARNING”.
“the goo pile that is now your body”
i’m dying over here, jesus
please, Jory, come challenge me to a bout of internet witticsisms; i promise, it’ll be fun.
*shoots you dead* Heh, idiot… *leaves with my three weed smorking girlfriends to go hold hands and kiss.*
this dude playin omg
Come again? *The bar falls silent. No one dares to make a sound, as you have just said a very poor choice of words at a very dangerous time. I remain slumped over the bar, not looking back to you. One hand limply holding an almost empty bottle, the other hand cradling my head. I repeat the question, this time louder.* Come again?! *You can hear me slur the words, the sentence sounds like a real struggle for me to get out. I’m clearly intoxicated. A bead of sweat rolls down your face as you realize you might have just fucked up in a very major way. Everyone else in the bar is pretending to not notice what is going on. The bartender idly washes a mug with a cloth. His eyes are closed and he’s muttering something to himself. A handful of people hurriedly leave. One person looks back at you, a look of sorrow on their face. They almost say something, but shake their head and cast their eyes down to the floor, and leave. But not you. You stand, petrified. A quick look at me reveals I’m still at the bar. You look to the exit, there’s still time. But there’s not, there’s not, there’s not. Your fate was sealed the moment you opened your mouth.* Mother fuck.. what did you say?! *I slowly rise from my stool and being to lumber over to you. I look a mess. My hair is unkempt, I haven’t shaved in what looks like months, there are dark heavy bags under my eyes, my shirt is stained and has holes in it, and I’m missing a shoe. But the main thing you notice is the gun tucked into my jeans, and my massive muscle arms that look like they were made for punching. You know that song about the boots that were made for walking? Yeah, it’s like that only instead of boots it’s my muscles and instead of walking it’s punching. As I drunkenly sway over to you, you think of your family… Will they mourn you, or will they try and forget this blotch of stupidity, that their child insulted the Jory publicly, ever happened to their family? Your thoughts are cut short as I now stand face to face with you. I grab your face and pull you even closer.* Playin?! There was nothing playing… no playing you fuck. No playing… it was real.. the realest thing I’ve ever know.. felt… Love. I loved them… Blaiz…. Chas-Chas… Funk… I loved all three of em… but they…*My face is wet with tears and I’m blinking constantly in vain to hold them back.* They left me… left… *Almost instantly the sadness leaves my face and is replaced with pure anger.* Playin? Playin?! *My hand leaves your face and starts to head to what you think is the gun. You close your eyes and see God looking at you, shrugging. ‘Pft, you brought this upon yourself dude.’ He says as he waves his hands at you dismissively. But instead of the gun, my hands grab yours. Your eyes jolt open and the anger is gone from my face. There is only sadness.* Left me… * I fall to the floor and sob.* Wow, grow up. *You say before you leave the bar but are hit almost immediately from a car and are killed upon impact.*
Happy Holiday
I swear this gets worse every time...
What do you mean by ‘worse’? One gets closer to ascension with each of these perfect shots 🤤
cock. balls, even.
OH, SO YOU CAN POST BALL SHAVING ADS AND BONGS EVERYWHERE, BUT WHEN I, TUMBLR USER MILFBLACKBEARD,
Shout out to Spanish for having the correct word for kitties. This is literally el gato there's no other word for it
we have multiple actually. you forgot gatito and gatita.
HOW could I forget....
Los gatitos....
your ocs are so shaped
Aren't we all
I DIDN'T MEAN TO ADD THE VIDEO
TIL that when cable was introduced it was advertised as having no commercials due to being a paying service.
via reddit.com
>TV comes in on antenna >Has commercials >Cable offers TV without commercials >Cable starts airing commercials >Cable charges extra for bonus channels like HBO >Cable starts breaking up channels into a dozen extra packages with about half a dozen garbage channels for every one channel you DO want to try and convince you to buy multiple packages >People say fuck it and start pirating shit >Streaming comes out >Offers free TV with ads or no ads with a paid subscription >Subscriptions become required >Ads are shown anyway despite it being a paid service >Dozens of streaming services all have exclusive content requiring multiple subscriptions >People say fuck it and start pirating shit again We really came full circle on this one.