Just Garrus to you

Garrus Vakarian, sniper, vigilante, former C-Sec officer. Currently on board the Normandy. Not much else to say, really. Other than perhaps I know what may have happened to Archangel, but that's all rumor of course. I also calibrate things occasionally. Never know when you might need that something extra. Ask Shepard. ------------------------------------------- ((OOC: This is a Garrus Vakarian roleplay blog I run specifically with Karin Shepard in mind. We run Shakarian around here, and I'm sort of new to this so be patient, don't be afraid to give me feedback, and remember I do this for fun and hope others will find it fun as well. Not trying to win any awards, but just want to capture Garrus's character as best I can. Karin and I are currently in a retro closed RP that started on OMEGA. I also have joined up with the SR2RE group and we are post ME3 with Gabby Shepard's crew. Feel free to jump in during any timeline. Send me asks, starters, whatever. I always check my box, but I do disappear at times because of work.)) ------------------------------------------ ((background img edited by me - from the art of ME, sidebar gif also by me))

[archkarian]

((It's been 4 months since I've really logged onto this thing. I didn't mean for it to get out of hand, but it has. I think I'm pretty much going to put it on a permanent HIATUS for now. At least until my life settles down and my actual muse and willingness to RP comes back. I honestly meant to put more into this, but life is life and that's how it is going to be. I'll keep the blog open, but I won't be active anymore. Sorry to anyone who this might inconvenience.))

[vorkosigans]

[archkarian]

“Imagine how I feel. I’m supposed to hate krogan, but you came along and warmed my heart with your winning personality.”

“I could throw a few salarians off a cliff if it’ll make you feel better.”

[archkarian]

OOC: PSA

((alright so my life has been pretty crazy, and i've been sick, and this thing is lying here inactive for like how many weeks now, damn. Anyways, I'm not gone - never really am - but busy as hell. If there is anyone who is wondering if I'm still alive or around, I AM! I just don't have a lot of time - never did - but I haven't shut down the blog or anything. I will DEFINITELY make some huge post if it ever comes to that. Which it HAS NOT. So sorry for the absence - again - and hopefully I'll be around more for interacting and such. Life pending :p ))

[karinshepard-blog]

Questioning Beliefs (Post-Horizon, ME2)

[karinshepard-blog]

It was odd, sitting there next to Garrus and having him tell her about her own funeral and memorial. Surprisingly, it helped. Maybe she wasn’t losing it.

I do still remember most of my life before -  

“It felt wrong, Shepard. The whole thing.” Garrus’s words, and something in his voice, snapped her back to the here and now. “Two years, and it always felt wrong. Then when you showed up on that bridge… Well, suddenly the odds just got a lot better.” He turned back to face her, and there was an intensity in his blue eyes that she’d never seen in the younger, hotheaded turian who’d first joined her crew.

The same turian whose voice she’d heard right before she blacked out over Alchera.

Karin felt the hairs on her arms stand on end.

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[archkarian]

Shepard’s reaction was more than he had anticipated. He had suspected she would be appreciative, but he didn’t expect her to be so moved. Swept up in her memories, he watched that familiar spark return to her eyes. Knowing the things only Karin Shepard could.

“I’m not going to pretend that this solves everything, Garrus, but if you were to find one thing that would make me remember who I am - you may have found it. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that the mighty Commander Shepard can’t be sentimental.”

He raised a brow arch at that. It had taken her a moment to gather her thoughts, and again she surprised him. He made a soft chuckle at the comment. No, he hadn’t pegged the Commander for being sentimental. Though he was beginning to see a lot more in Commander Shepard than he ever had before.

I suppose dying can bring that out in people.

In truth he hadn’t seen any evidence that she wasn’t Commander Shepard. He simply thought she deserved the benefit of the doubt. Dead or not, when she had shown up on that bridge, the last thing on his mind was suspicion. Disbelief, maybe, but she continued to prove herself over and over again. It was just… right.

“For that matter, you accepted that I am still me when *I*’m still not convinced. Still, I’m a lot more convinced now than I was when we got back from Horizon.”

Her tone was becoming more rushed. Something he noticed she did when nervous about something, or over-thinking a situation. Since they had been talking more, he had been picking up on these little nuances he hadn’t thought to notice before.

Then her tone changed.

“You…” She stuttered, taking a breath and starting over. “You said that my death felt wrong. It’s pretty clear you’ve been thinking about me since - what happened.  I may have been out of it for a couple of years, but I still remember something I should have said back then.”

He raised a brow arch, a genuine curiosity flooding him.

“In case it was in any way unclear, when you left Normandy to go back for Spectre training, I was really happy for you. Not that you were leaving, but that you were going back to do what you wanted to do and for the right reasons. And that I might have influenced that. It…meant a lot to me to hear you say that.”

Shepard was many things, but he had never known her to be hesitant about speaking her mind. Yet, she hesitated. He let what she said sink in slightly, but she was clearly struggling with whether or not to tell him more.

“I had no idea that you were Archangel. But finding out that you were was the best thing that’s happened for me in a long time. About two years to be exact. I’m just sorry I didn’t make it there sooner.”

He flared his mandibles slightly at her. He wanted to say something along the lines of “Yeah, I wish that too,” but the way she said it stopped him. As if she wasn’t quite saying everything. He realized, though, that her finding him as Archangel was one of the best things that ever happened for him, too.  

 “So…thank you. For everything.”

He blinked. Not quite sure how to respond. Commander Shepard thanking him. He wasn’t even sure what he deserved thanks for. She had explained it, but …

Then she did something he never in a millennia would have guessed Commander Shepard would ever do.

She hugged him. So simple. So human. So not like the military leader, the decisive Commander. It wasn’t like turians didn’t show affection, just… not…

He put his arm around her shoulder. It was a bit awkward, but it didn’t feel wrong. Her human frame seemed so small compared to his. A part of him screamed that this was crazy…

“Is this the protocol for returning lost medals?” He managed a chuckle, as they pulled away from each other.

He cleared his throat, trying to think of something to say that would be more… appropriate. She had shown so much trust and confidence in him. Even back then she never doubted him becoming a Spectre.

“I should be thanking you, Shepard. Not the other way around.” He rubbed his hands together idly, taking a breath.

“I wasn’t cut out for Spectre training. Heh. I wasn’t cut out for anything that had so much bureaucratic crap attached to it. Following orders without question was never my strong quality. It’s why I left C-Sec in the first place. I wanted to find Saren my own way, without having to answer to those fools. Though as Archangel… well, that didn’t go so well either. Not exactly a stellar record, especially for a turian. Still, you always believed in me Shepard.” He looked down, a pang of guilt pulsating through him at the thought of his team. He choked it out, moving on.

“The least I could do was believe in you… I never stopped believing in you, Shepard.” It was perhaps more than he meant to say, but there it was.

“Besides,” he flared his mandibles slightly at her, “there isn’t anyone in the galaxy better suited to kick the Collector’s ass than you. So it’s a damn good thing they brought you back to do it.”

She smiled at that, and for a moment he was glad he could at least not fail to make her smile.

“Whatever happens, Shepard. I’m with you. I have been since the beginning, and we’ve had one hell of a run so far.” He gave her a brief nod, but he hoped she knew how sincere he was.

He needed to process this, and his mind was racing trying to sort through all that was said. He motioned to take his leave, but paused at the doorway. Not wanting to just end things like that.

“Thanks Shepard, for everything.” He echoed the same words back to her, and that was that.

[archkarian]

Signing off for now. This damn gun isn't going to calibrate itself.

((I'll get to more replies and such later, feel free to keep asks, starters, random convo coming and I'll get to it when I can :) )).

[archkarian]

commanderemelineshepard started following you

[archkarian]

Heh. I don’t know what part of that made me qualified for anything like this, Shepard. Being right about the Reapers coming has never felt like much of a victory. If it makes you feel any better, I don’t like to see you twitching, or suffering. Of course there is no doubt that you kick ass, Shepard. That’s why they choose you to do all the hard work. Heh.

As for the drinks, just a figure of speech, Shepard. Though the offer still stands.

[quietparagon-deactivated2016120]

Pffffffffff, I don’t know… I think you’re qualified for it. Sticking by me for so long and surviving has got to give the qualifications for everything under the sun. We all know I would be here kicking Reaper ass even if Brass or the Council told me not to. This is something that I have to do. It makes me feel a lot better, Garrus, not that I ever doubted you in the slightest.

Once there’s some actual downtime, I’ll take you up on that offer… … Only if you’re paying. HA!

[archkarian]

Well, with your "average" alcohol tolerance I suppose I could manage that. Heh. I appreciate the confidence, Shepard. Just never figured there would be countless lives affected by my decisions. *he shakes his head* No, I don't think there are qualifications for that.

It's good to know, though, that you would be here kicking ass regardless of orders. Something makes me think I would be right here with you either way. I'm here if you need me.

[archkarian]

almostaphantom replied to your post: Hey, Garrus. Always meant to ask. What the fuck is…

Well, that’s a shitty answer. So you like wear it in the shower and stuff? When you’re getting it on? When you’re sleeping? Shit, man, that’s got to be uncomfortable.

It’s custom calibrated and custom fit based on the turian redesign of the Kuwashii visor. Given all that it’s pretty comfortable. *he crosses his arms and chuckles* Besides, since when do you care what I wear in the shower, Jack?

[almostaphantom]

La-dee-dah. How fancy.

You still didn’t answer the question. Come on, Vakarian, I don’t give a shit what you wear in the shower. It’s just weird, wearing a visor. Won’t it short out? Do you get, like, scalp itch under it? How do you dry it out?

It just seems dumb.

Also, Shepard doesn’t need a fancy visor to make headshots. Just sayin’.

[archkarian]

I never said one way or the other, Jack. Since it means so much to you, though, no it won't short out in water. Scalp itch is a human condition, and drying it out isn't a problem. *He chuckles* It also plays music and monitors heart rates and various stats. It's useful to have around, and no, it doesn't make you any better at headshots. That is an acquired skill.

[archkarian]

Well, thanks to Jack, now I have the mental image of you as a baby with your visor in your tiny fist. Is that when it all started, Garrus? The epic love story of a Turian and his tech.

*he chuckles* Well, being born a turian isn't like being born human. We are practically told from birth that we have to serve the military somehow. I just happened to be better with a sniper rifle than most. Heh.

As far as love story? Heh. Shepard, you should know me better than that. Though now that I think about it, this visor has been with me for a long time. It's like an old friend.

[archkarian]

almostaphantom replied to your post: Hey, Garrus. Always meant to ask. What the fuck is...

Well, that’s a shitty answer. So you like wear it in the shower and stuff? When you’re getting it on? When you’re sleeping? Shit, man, that’s got to be uncomfortable.

It's custom calibrated and custom fit based on the turian redesign of the Kuwashii visor. Given all that it's pretty comfortable. *he crosses his arms and chuckles* Besides, since when do you care what I wear in the shower, Jack?

[anonymouspacemagician-deactivat]

Hopefully. I just remembered messing with them and trashing the hangar… I also broke the coffee machine like three times. 

None of the Shepards were amused. 

[archkarian]

I can agree with that. A Shepard without their coffee is sort of like a Krogan in a blood rage. The hangar is Vega’s department. I’m sure he’ll have fun with that. Heh. The Normandy has been through worse, though.

[anonymouspacemagician-deactivat]

I shudder to think what would have happened if Karin had not repaired it. 

I kind of also make Joker panic when I tampered with the Normandy’s controls. Everything seems to be under control though. 

[archkarian]

That's just Joker. It took him months before he stopped breaking his thumb on the mute when EDI was installed. Doesn't like anyone even looking at the controls too long. *He chuckles* If there is one thing I've learned being aboard this ship, it is to expect anything. Just glad things are back to normal for now.

[archkarian]

Hey, Garrus. Always meant to ask. What the fuck is up with that visor thing? You ever take it off or what?

Jack. Surprised that you're curious about it, but then you were always surprising. Heh. Let's just say my visor is like your tattoos. No other in the galaxy like it, and it is.. significant to me. As for taking it off, heh, I suppose I'll just let you figure that out.

[anonymouspacemagician-deactivat]

archkarian replied to your post: I just remembered.

Nothing that can’t be fixed. Heh. If I can deal with EDI and Legion messing with these things, I’m sure I can handle a loose spirit or two.

Hopefully. I just remembered messing with them and trashing the hangar… I also broke the coffee machine like three times. 

None of the Shepards were amused. 

[archkarian]

I can agree with that. A Shepard without their coffee is sort of like a Krogan in a blood rage. The hangar is Vega's department. I'm sure he'll have fun with that. Heh. The Normandy has been through worse, though.

[archkarian]

Vakarian, signing in for a few hours. Let me know if you need me for something.

[karinshepard-blog]

Questioning Beliefs (Post-Horizon, ME2)

[karinshepard-blog]

Karin hadn’t really been expecting the door to open. She probably should have; if nothing else, someone probably noticed the change on the door’s panel from red to green. At least her ‘visitor’ was Garrus. Shepard wasn’t particularly interested in dealing with Miranda right now. She smiled slightly in relief. 

“Ran into Miranda. She was more pleasant than usual. I told her I’d set you straight, because you know how big I am on protocols.” Garrus’s comment caught her completely off-guard, and she chuckled before she could stop herself. Garrus flared his mandibles slightly, but he hesitated at the doorway.   She motioned him in so that the door would close, and when it did, she locked it again. 

“How’s that for a role reversal? You get sent to lecture me about protocols when the sender’s pretty sure I’ll just ignore them anyway?” She rolled her eyes for dramatic effect. “You’re such a bad influence, Vakarian.” The good-natured smirk she gave him didn’t last, though. Karin sighed and leaned against the window and sighed. 

“I actually didn’t think anyone would notice, given the time. Guess I was wrong about that.” Suddenly unable to meet his gaze, Karin turned her eyes back to the window. “Seems like I’ve been doing that a lot lately.”

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[archkarian]

He didn’t know what he had expected to find when the doors opened. It certainly wasn’t this.

He listened intently while Shepard spoke, taking a seat next to her, watching her movements. Where there was always confidence and certainty, now seemed to be only hesitation and defeat.

At least he had made her laugh. That alone had seemed worth something.

She couldn’t meet his eyes; she just simply looked at her hands, conflict written on her face.

He wasn’t sure what to say, and he couldn’t help but be angry that she was even considering these things.

He shook his head and sighed. She winced slightly, and looked up at him finally. He could tell she was expecting him to leave.

Instead, he placed a hand on her shoulder. Like she had for him on Omega, like he had for her on Alchera.

“Well, you’ve always been a little crazy, Shepard, but you’re real. The Karin Shepard I knew, and still know, does what she has to. The Collector’s may have killed you, but you’re still here, and you haven’t changed.” He tilted his head slightly, relaxing his mandibles and doing his best to reassure her it was the truth.

“I was at the funeral, you know. Your funeral. Nice service by human standards. Talked about how you were a big hero, savior of humanity. Heh. Of course nobody said anything about Saren, or Sovereign. Still, they even made a memorial statue in your honor.” He took his arm off her shoulder and placed it at his side, looking off into the window.

“It felt wrong, Shepard. The whole thing.” He shook his head. “Two years, and it always felt wrong. Then when you showed up on that bridge… “ He turned his gaze toward her again. “Well, suddenly the odds just got a lot better.”

She was staring at him intently, her green eyes regaining some of the fire that he knew no VI or AI could reproduce.

He cleared his throat. The silence suddenly feeling awkward between them.

“Besides, you’re not the only one who was brought back to life by Cerberus tech.” He pointed to his still healing implant, a permanent mark of his own. “Of course it’s nothing compared to being spaced into a planet, but I try.” He flared his mandibles slightly at her.

She raised an eyebrow at him, a little smile coming to her face again. It didn’t last long, though. She sighed again and stared out into the emptiness of space.

They stared out of the window for a few moments, before he suddenly remembered the whole reason he wanted to talk to Shepard in the first place.

He shifted his weight, drawing the small item from his pocket. Her Star of Terra. He cupped it in his palm, wondering if there was some protocol humans had for giving things like this.

“Shepard. I found this on Alchera. I… Well, I kept meaning to return it to you. I think now is as good a time as any. I don’t think anyone but the real Commander Shepard could appreciate it.”

He took her hand and placed the glittering gold medal in her small palm. Hoping it might just be the closure she needed, and would remind her of the fact she was the only human in the damn galaxy who could have accomplished what she had.

[archkarian]

claireshepard started following you

[archkarian]

Sure. Throw down a few rugs in here and it’s downright cozy. Heh. Besides, someone has to calibrate this damn gun.

[claireshepard-deactivated201309]

Someone’s gotta do it. Sure ain’t gonna be me. 

[archkarian]

*He chuckles* I knew you kept me around for more than my aim, Shepard. Just didn't realize how much you needed my help. In this war, I don't think we can have too many big guns. You just do what you do best, and I'll do the same. Heh.

[archkarian]

commanderemelineshepard started following you

[archkarian]

You know me, Shepard. I’m not easy to kill. Still, it’s not like the old days. I almost miss just being known as the ex- C-sec officer and vigilante. Heh. Of course they only put me in charge because nobody else wanted to do it. Guess you know all about that. I know things are looking pretty grim, but just remember that a certain turian friend of yours is always more than willing to meet you at the bar and drink you under the table.

[quietparagon-deactivated2016120]

Or maybe they put you in charge because you’re the best one for the job? They do this stuff to me because they like to see me suffer greatly. The lot of them won’t be happy unless I’m twitching all over. 

I’m sorry but, drink me under the table? Excuse you, Vakarian, that level of sass is unneeded. No need to remind me of my average alcohol tolerance, either. Hmph.

[archkarian]

Heh. I don't know what part of that made me qualified for anything like this, Shepard. Being right about the Reapers coming has never felt like much of a victory. If it makes you feel any better, I don't like to see you twitching, or suffering. Of course there is no doubt that you kick ass, Shepard. That's why they choose you to do all the hard work. Heh.

As for the drinks, just a figure of speech, Shepard. Though the offer still stands.

[alordofmodestmeanss]

Garrus Vakarian. Totally unstoppable.