a note about the sexualization of minors
it would mean a lot to me if you made it through this whole thing!
tw - mentions of sexual assault/harassment (towards me) and of minor smut
preface: i’m aware that she (@imaginethesedorks) pulls all of this shit not only fot her own twisted fantasies, but to garner attention as well - however, i think that the only way to do anything about the bullshit she’s been consistently pulling for months is to discuss it as a community
that being said, here we go - my second ever rant about sexualizing minors
here’s the first and the addition
honestly @imaginethesedorks has me blocked on this blog so sadly she won’t see this but i want to expand on a really harmful possible effect of her blog just… existing, at this point
and that is the fact that she normalizes sexual thoughts about minors and invading their space in such a frankly disgusting way not only for adults - which is horrific - but also for other minors
there are kids who have been defending her, children who are teenagers themselves who think that she’s within her rights to be writing and posting smut about individuals who are not yet of legal age, who are unaware of how her ideas can manipulate their own visions of themselves and of people in their age group
i digress for now - give me a second to be personal about this issue like i have in my previous letter/rant - i’ll try to be short about it, but likely won’t be
i’m pretty much going to be writing this in a very stream-of-consciousness way because i think that’ll bring across the point that i’m… i’m a pretty young kid by showcasing the way i think - hopefully it’ll remind some people of the fact that, likely, underage idols feel/think the same way
when i first wrote the letter about sexualization, i was 14 years old. the second time i wrote on the topic, adding onto that previous letter, i was 15
i hate that this is a cyclical thing, but it appears to be - i’m 16 years old now
some background on me - i started my sophomore year back in august, am a generally good student (see: top 6% in my school, top 1% in the nation), spend a lot of time reading/writing/mixing music, have some of the best friends ever, love dogs (i’m getting a lab in may i’m so hype)
i spend 2-4 hours at a college prep school outside of school a week, came home 2.5 hours late everyday up until two weeks ago (that’s when wrestling season ended for me), have almost 100 volunteer hours and am a part of clubs like rotary and model un. much of my time is eaten up by things like studying, practicing (wrestling), volunteering, and, of course - i spend quite a bit of time suppressing memories
yeah, now we’re getting somewhere
i was sexually molested at age 6 (the memories were buried really, really fucking deep in my mind and recently resurfaced. i don’t want to talk much about it, so i won’t expand. please forgive me for this) by a friend who was not honestly that much older than me. they knew what they were doing, though. it still fucks me up
by the time i hit 15 i’d been groped - mostly nonconsensually, i’m not faulting anyone i consented to - multiple times by people i called friends
by now, i’ve seen my friends and me all get messaged by creepy people our age and older trying (badly) to get into our pants
i’ve also seen far more dick pics than, quite frankly, have been necessary (0 would’ve been a good number)
most of this isn’t anything different from what many people go through at my age - reminder, i’m 16 - regardless of gender (plenty of my male friends have had uncomfortable, sexual experiences by this time, as well)
a guy friend of mine on the team recently told me that my ass, and the asses of my other female teammates, constitute some of the most vulgar locker room talk that comes up for the other male team members
i’ve been catcalled. i’ve learned to text my friends that i’ve gotten home safely after walking even ten minutes alone. i’ve learned to ask for texts in return
i’ve said it before, and i’ll continue to say it - this shouldn’t be normal. this sexualization of something that i know as my body, as my forever home, shouldn’t be considered allowable. i’m not even halfway through high school. i’ve never been kissed, but i know what it’s like to have other people’s hands all over me when i don’t want them there
i know what it feels like to know, to have an inkling that other people are using me as fuel for their fantasies. it’s disgusting. it’s vomit inducing, and, frankly, i don’t like - i l o a t h e - the idea that people can know that these feelings, that these scenarios i’ve mentioned exist and bother people my age like this, and still write smut and sexual situations about people in my age group like it’s okay to do so
children under 18 are just that - children. treat them - treat us - as such, goddamn. it’s not that hard. it’s not like we’re saying “don’t write makeout scenes” or “dont write fics where kissing happens” because that’s not it. that’s not it at all. sex scenes, however? smut? that’s crossing a line that’s put there for a reason
i’ve grown up, like most of the people reading this, actually, in an age where bodies aren’t nearly as taboo as they used to be - and i’m really, really glad, because this means that body positivity is so much more accessible and societally acceptable than before
however, it means that bodies themselves, our bodies, are so much more accessible to others. so much easier to sexualize
social media works wonders. all media does. it connects us
sometimes it exposes us to sick fuckers who sexualize people who aren’t even college age yet
just because, for example, members of nct dream are on the world stage, it does not give anyone permission to exploit their likeness/images/personalities for twisted sexual fantasies and fetishes. just because they found themselves more viewable and vulnerable than the average 15-17 year old does not mean that they’re prepared for people to exploit them like this - like writing smut about them for self satisfaction. renjun and jeno and donghyuck and jaemin and chenle and jisung never signed anything that said “yeah, you can sexualize me” or some complete bullshit like that.
that’s about all i can say about society but tl;dr sexualizing u18s is nasty as FUCK anyways
4) breakdown of some common arguments (that i’ve seen on this specific blog)
1. what’s the difference between 17 and 18? they don’t just magically fucking change or anything
– yeah, you’re right. we don’t change when we turn 18. not physically, at least, or mentally right then and there. however, during their 18th year, most people leave home or experience the outside world more. worldview widens. we leave the confines of being “of school age”. it’s more a situational change than a personality one at first, but our surroundings end up impacting ourselves and senses of selves heavily. the difference between a 17 year old high schooler and 18 year old college freshman is great. very great. it’s the same all around, almost. you just get exposed to more at 18 and become mature
2. i know kids who have sex lmao why can’t i write about kids having sex
– out of my grade of oh, 500? people, none are pregnant. i’d say maybe 10% are sexually active. that’s one hell of a minority. most of us are more concerned about our end of year exams, thanks. either way, idols aren’t among those who are having sex - not only is the culture of korea far different than western countries, they have to juggle training, recording, etc. with schoolwork and other “normal kid stuff”. they just don’t have the time, so you can shove this excuse up your ass :)
3. it’s my blog, i can do what i want
– yeah, and it’s my blog, so i can call you the fuck out for your harmful behaviors. posting smut about minors can cause other impressionable young people to think that what you’re doing is acceptable, and that in itself is indoctrination. it’s gross. it has the marks of fetishizing underaged sexual relationships and that’s disgusting, especially as you’re a definite adult. the fact that you paint yourself as warm and a generous, motherlike figure is even more horrendous as you’ve managed to convince u18 kids that your twisted perspective is correct. you’re hurting the people you’re claiming to protect such as your “lovely” anons and children who are backing you up. you’re creating a pathetic monster out of yourself and blaming us of sound mind when you get called out
since i don’t feel like i’m going to be organized if i continue speaking, this is all i have to say right now. i am horrified, disgusted, and in general just deeply sick to my stomach thinking of the fact that people sexualize and write smuts for kids, who likely spend more time playing overwatch than thinking about sex. @imaginethesedorks twists being a child into something hideous for her own pleasure and to gain attention and as somebody who’s seen the evils of losing a childhood, i can’t help but feel wretched thinking about how she is affecting her followerbase. there’s not much else i can say other than that i am disgusted. if you’ve read this far, thank you so much! block/report @imaginethesedorks and please, if you feel the need to talk to me about your own experiences or your feelings about this, do so! i am here to listen <3
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