Clark Kent And The Robins
Despite his vehement spluttering and constant insistence that he works alone, Batman has a series of children that are the light of his life. Clark, being the wholesome super-spud that he is, revels in meeting his nephews every single time.
“They arent your nephews, Clark-”
“Dick, Uncle Clark's brought you some farm fresh apple pie!”
“Uncle Clark, your the best!”
Here is how Clark met the Robins
Who is this small ray of light that is smiling at me
Of course I will take you flying
Here, have some sweet potato pie, you're a growing boy
A hug for me? Don't mind if I do!
Hello nephew, I have come to read you the bedtime story that you requested
Oh hi Bruce, what do you mean, how did I get in, I flew in, obviously-
Why are you so mean Bruce, here, have some sweet potato pie-
Hello new nephew, I am your Uncle Clark, I live on a farm-
What do you mean, what is a farm
A farm has animals, and grass, and fresh air- no, not like rats, animals like cows and horses-
No, you're right, there are no farms in Gotham :(
But surely you must have had sweet potato pie!
Why yes, I do hit bad guys very hard
Let me tell you a story about the time I punched Luthor through a wall-
He's so small and devious, just like Bruce
Hello new nephew, here, have two slices of sweet potato pie
Why yes, that's my brother Kon-
Oh look Bruce, they're making friends
Friends don't do that with each other, surely not-
Konathan Kent you get your hands off of that boy right now- how dare you give me the finger!
Grounded! Grounded for ONE THOUSAND YEARS!!!
Why, you're even smaller than the others, and Tim was pretty dang tiny
I agree, they are glorious
Of course I will teach you how to milk the cows
No, no, I don't need a blood pact to be your farm mentor!
What do you mean potatoes aren't sweet, it's sweet potato pie-
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