26 [M4F] Midwest USA - looking to chat about toots, make friends, and see where that goes!
Hi all! I typically don't post much over here, but figured I would shift the focus of this blog away from writing and roleplaying (though I still do those things) to advertising myself as an eligible, toot-lovin' bachelor. I'll continue to reblog the usual kink posts, of course :)
I've got some hope for this because I'm not super into fart domination, more just casual romantic farts and ripping them together with a special someone, cooking for her and spoiling her while she farts up a storm... more about that below the cut!
tl;dr: Looking to meet gassy women, but I welcome any tips for finding and meeting other like-minded fart lovers! Just signed up for a FET account but am really curious where else I might look for my dream gal. Anyone in the Twin Cities/Midwest interested in chatting about fart kink stuff? I’m ultimately looking for a long-term relationship, but I’d like to start just chatting and being friends.
I’m into various nerdy things like gaming, tabletop RPGs, and anime/manga; I also enjoy hanging out with friends, trying new foods and activities, and running in my spare time. Politically, I am firmly on the left; pro-choice, anti-war, everyone deserves healthcare and housing... these things are all important to me and probably non-negotiable for dating, but I'm an agreeable dude, and open to chatting with most folks!
I’m bi, but my fart fetish is mostly directed towards women. I have a lot of fantasies about pampering a woman who’s naturally gassy and has regular tummy troubles - both shyness and proud farting are hot to me. I would love to fart together with a prospective kinky friend and be outfarted by her! I’m a decently gassy person myself, and though I don’t get anything out of my own farts, I really enjoy the idea of openly ripping ass with someone else.
All this leads to the ultimate fantasy of having a gassy wife I can cook for and tease her when she starts blowing out the inevitable results. If she can’t help but fart in front of our friends and family, well, that might be embarrassing for her - but I’d be more than happy to comfort her and praise her after the fact.
I’m also a long-time roleplayer and writer! I’ve written a lot of fart fetish fanfics over the years and would be happy to share those and discuss. I can also provide pictures of myself if we hit it off, though I’m a little uncomfortable sharing those publicly online.
DMs open! Hope to chat soon ;) if we hit it off, I'm happy to share some of the writing I do about gassy submissive women lol
A friend came up with an idea... a mysterious, unlabeled game from a garage sale, with exactly one thing that seems to be 'wrong' with it... which is that its generic JRPG protagonist CANNOT stop farting.
These farts happen with seemingly no rhyme or reason. Regardless of whether they're idle, doing an idle animation, performing an attack, or in an important cutscene, they can fart at any time and send their low-poly cape fluttering out. Their gas is made worse by the fact that eating at taverns replaces sleeping at inns in this game, and the food they serve is the greasiest, grungiest, gassiest stuff you could find in a fantasy setting.
The NPCs in the game barely if ever acknowledge the deluge of farts. They never comment on it or react to it, even when the protagonist is nonchalantly cutting off their dialogue with a meaty ripper. If anything, they're kinda making it worse by giving out free consumable items and running the taverns that enable the protagonist to both heal and fuel up.
The more the main hero farts, the more noticeable this... peculiar smell coming from the speakers gets. It reeks of rotten veggies, meat, eggs... the stink varies, but usually varies according to what consumable item or tavern food they last ate. Sometimes it can get especially pungent, especially indoors and/or when the camera is close up.
The player isn't alone in noticing, either. The NPCs can also smell the protagonist's farts, they just don't have lines of dialogue to express their disgust or an animation of them covering their nose. If you look closely, you might notice their low-resolution expressions start to look sicker and more irritated the longer the hero is left to idle near them and fart randomly.
Worst(?) of all, the protagonist themself knows too. They're actually more likely to fart if they're close to the camera or an NPC, and if the player ever gets up and leaves the room for whatever reason (i.e getting a snack, opening a window), the unattended hero is liable to sieze the moment by sidling closer to an NPC and letting it rip, or proudly lifting a leg when they're not supposed to have an animation for that. If the camera's already close, they might even run up to it, practically jam their ass against the screen, and rip such loud, proud, and bubbly ass that the player can hear it clearly from another room... only for them to run back and find their character innocently in the middle of a fidget animation, as if they didn't just make the living room smell twice as bad as it did before. They refuse to do it again if the player tries to reproduce the event.
But the absolute worst results are when the player farts. If they so much as lean over to let out a modestly audible rip, the hero 'coincidentally' happens to loose a fart that's WAY bigger and badder than anything that anyone on either side of the screen has slipped out up to that point. And they still manage to never react even while they're irradiating the room on the other side.
Whenever I see people utilizing the heat of farts in a scenario, it’s usually to make things too hot. Overheating, dripping sweat, accentuating discomfort and overwhelming sensations. And while I’m sure that’s sexy to a lot of people, it just, uh, isn’t for me. Because I’m a sensitive lil guy who just likes feeling nice (and am sensitive to too-hot temperatures).
So instead, I offer: the warmth of farts as a relief.
It’s winter, and Person A is freezing. They’ve just come in from outside and the upper layer of skin for their face, ears, and whatever else was exposed to the elements still feels frozen through. Maybe the heater is still taking a while to kick in, so the inside of the house is cold too.
Fortunately, they know they have a full night of cuddling with Person B ahead of them. And Person B has been eating their favorite (gas-inducing) food all day.
Person A curls up behind B, with their face right in the line of fire, and sighs in relief as the farts roll out. Warm, thick clouds of gas flow from B and surround A like a loving embrace. They defrost while taking deep, loving sniffs, bringing some of that nice hot air inside of them.
You know what's funny? I don't watch Mukbang content, but I'd be full-face lying if I told you that my mind hasn't done it's conjuring.
Lying in a Q&A video to her fans that she won't hire an editor because she 'enjoys the process' and not because she'd rather die than have someone else slave away combing through hours of footage to cut her various gaseous expulsions that ring out during a recording session.
Sheepishly checking up the package tracking of several sound absorbing panels for her walls after her Wendy's family-sized chili bucket and baconators story time session had her relentlessly barking out of both ends so much, it caused her apartment neighbors to ask if she could quiet her dogs down(She doesn't have pets).
Investing in some thick rugs under her table and chair so she when she's straight-facing a long, quiet rumbler it won't visibly ripple whatever drink she has in a glass.
Investing in a large standing desk to eat off of so she can raise it just enough between cuts to subtly unbutton or loosen her pants mid-recording, and getting a stream deck so she can mute mics if and when she's got big ones she needs to rip/can't hold back.
Forgetting to prerecord an ad read and having to do it mid recording, wiping the ring of Buldak ramen broth off her lips and having to retry takes because she keeps cutting herself off with long gurgly belches or cheek trembling toots. She manages to wield it back and get a good take in, hitting the clip button just in time before she winces and ripples a long, bubbly one up the back of her seat.
Shaking hands after signing a long term sponsor deal, internally dancing off the walls when she sees that the big wigs use the elevator closest to them and not the one she took... squeezing in a review of local café an hour before on an anxious tummy did her no favors farting up the small metal space. At least she got, well, most of it out before she hit the meeting room floor.
Keeping the center console of her car stocked with sprays and air fresheners for her car reviews, she forgot to do so last time and reviewing the new Dave's Hot Chicken Hot Mozz left her visibly fogging up her windows with her gas before having to roll them down and drive home in her smog.
Bonus if they're into it, and makes compilations of their gas for an audience behind a paywall.
Lately I've been writing characters making dramatic speeches, saying something moving, or serious, or forming a real emotional connection... and then accidentally letting fly with the most enormous poorly timed fart they possibly could have humanly performed 💨💨💨
Immediately yes, I was literally fantasizing about that todayyyyyyy. And I’m gonna be thinking about it again nowwww a heartfelt moment and big bubbly fart 🫠
someone farting in a pool/hottub with you in it is already hot, but what about a bath? it’s so much smaller and more intimate and ruins the whole purpose of what you’re in there to do. just listening to the rumbles echo off the bathtub, watching the bubbles float up, smelling them when they pop, sitting in someone’s nasty fart water. god.
bath farts are hot for a lot of reasons but the intimacy, aka the potential for really getting up in someone's personal space, and the water being a threat to breathing are two big ones.
like imagine there's really not enough room for the two of u in the bath, and the other person just sits right up in contact with u or maybe even just on top of u, carelessly releasing huge gross farts that rumble against ur skin and bubble up into ur breathing space. and u try to move around but it just makes u slip, sliding further past/underneath them, ur face closer to the water, stuck breathing the rotten air at the very surface as they keep farting in the water
You walk into my apartment 2 play games with me but you get a face full of ass gas because I fart like a cow when I'm nervous and was so anxious/excited about u coming over I couldn't stop
Giving a lactose intolerant person milk without them knowing; it's like drugging them to fart. Pretending not to notice while their stomach rumbles and groans, ask them what's wrong and see if they'll fess up to needing to shit/fart...
someone farting in a pool/hottub with you in it is already hot, but what about a bath? it’s so much smaller and more intimate and ruins the whole purpose of what you’re in there to do. just listening to the rumbles echo off the bathtub, watching the bubbles float up, smelling them when they pop, sitting in someone’s nasty fart water. god.
bath farts are hot for a lot of reasons but the intimacy, aka the potential for really getting up in someone's personal space, and the water being a threat to breathing are two big ones.
like imagine there's really not enough room for the two of u in the bath, and the other person just sits right up in contact with u or maybe even just on top of u, carelessly releasing huge gross farts that rumble against ur skin and bubble up into ur breathing space. and u try to move around but it just makes u slip, sliding further past/underneath them, ur face closer to the water, stuck breathing the rotten air at the very surface as they keep farting in the water
I can say that like 95% of the time I'm not into eprocto or eructo in sexual way, but the other 5% comes from extremely specific scenarios.
I'm really into the idea of a character with a stomach ache getting their belly rubbed and being unaware they have trapped gas. Whoever is rubbing their tummy hits a kind of sweet spot, and they barely have time to react before they let out a massive burp or fart.
It's the TLC and the buildup and the subsequent embarrassment... bonus if tummy rubber just laughs it off and says sth like "do you feel a bit lighter now?".. augh..
An underrated phrase has to be 'They're usually not this bad.'
"They're usually not this bad."
She says, gripping the arm of her metal chair to minimize the visual trembling from her caramel brownie sundae-powered rumblers at the Ice Cream Parlor. She mentally pats herself on the back for choosing the the far corner outdoor seating...This time.
She huffs to herself with a pout, a hazy flush on her face as her large birthday cake cold brew latte has her toots coming out so warm, it's causing condensation to form on the metal walls of the elevator. Thankfully she's always the first to arrive in the office, the elevator will air out before people start flowing in. Always does.
She drunkenly mutters into her hand, faking that she left her phone at the table to separate from the girls and drop a few bombs, the deep, bassy, bubbly ones are quick to heat up the cushioned both seat. It should be illegal for edm clubs to serve Veggie Samosas, practically a war crime that they're actually good too.
She mutters under her breath as she feels all of her cheek meat rippling from a seemingly endless guttural fart roaring through her sleep shorts-covered rear. Bar crawl hangover aside, she's appreciative of the loud ass semitruck 'covering' for her at the red light of the crosswalk she's trying to clear. She can smell that they, at some point, went to Buffalo Wild Wings, as per tradition when they get blackout drunk. She's so out of it it hasn't even occurred to her that she's on autopilot, heading towards the big golden arches with her go-to breakfast order subconsciously ready.
She groans, the third or fourth comforter rippling fart did the trick in waking her up, her phone screen reading the time and April 21st. She glances at her desk to see the carnage of emptied pre roll tubes and about two bags from different local pizza joints.
I was struck with the urge to write some domestic MILF farts based on a concept I've always liked — a gassy wife getting outed for flatulent behavior by her own children. In this continuity H****a has taken greater pains to avoid farting around her family, but they know she can rip some gnarly ones. Her healthy diet sure has her firing on all cylinders, though, and for the first time her husband walks in on his sweet, polite, ladylike wife having quite the gassy attitude around the kids.
Might just be a me thing, but it's always so hot when a mother is more childish and silly around her kid(s), loosening her gassy asshole around her babies when she would NEVER do something so rude ordinarily... only for that side of her to be exposed to the husband. Naturally, this leads to him being privy to more and more flatulent incidents until the wife is openly ripping fat ass around the house (and perhaps beyond 💨😳)
TW: very gassy mom farting around her kids below the cut
Dad, Mom Keeps Farting!
Hinata was particularly engrossed in a good book when the pressure built at her wide, jiggly backdoor — normally she might've excused herself to the restroom or held it in, but she was too invested, and too relaxed at home as of late. And so, the plump, dough-bottomed MILF simply lifted a phat cheek in an easy, dainty motion, and let 'er rip.
bbhbrrh-brp-bbBBbBROOMPHT!!
Right in front of her kids, who were playing video games on the floor (Hinata's derriere took up a large amount of space on the couch, and was quite volatile nowadays besides).
Her bubbly flatus was fueled by her continued attempts to eat healthy, so it was boiled eggs and kimchi this morning... the amount of steaming hot gas that came blasting out her derriere startled even Hinata as the cushions — those of the couch and those massive mounds she called an ass — partially muffled her fart while amplifying it at the same time.
It was, all in all, an extremely nasty and unladylike ripper.
"Aw, Mom!" Boruto covered his nose and gave his pink-faced mother the stink eye.
"Mommy faaaar-teeeed," Himawari chimed in, also fanning the air.
"Goodness, excuse me..." Hinata wafted her whale of an ass shyly. Farting in front of the kids was more Naruto's thing... she generally tried to be more polite, but this diet, phew. It really made her quite—
"Mooom!!" Boruto was aghast as Hinata let out a soft, surprised gasp and loosed another downright musical gas attack that flapped her meaty buns and outright rumbled the couch.
"Mommy is GASSY today! Pee-yew!"
"Sorryyyy..." Hinata groaned, face hot with embarrassment...but she couldn't help the bashful smile on her face either. Goodness, she couldn't stop letting it rip today! But her sweet babies' reactions were both cute and a little amusing. They were both scrunching up their faces, yet it was clear neither of them wanted to hurt their farty mama's feelings by telling her to leave. It made Hinata feel very affectionate...and a bit guilty that her terrible toots were stinking up the place. No, that wasn't it — she felt guilty because she didn't feel guilty. A demure, ladylike, caring mother shouldn't enjoy ripping massive farts around her kids!
So why did it feel so liberating to fart around her family? It was so confusing. She was just glad that her husband wasn't home to—
"I'm home!" Naruto called as he opened the door, making Hinata's heart stutter. He walked into the living room with a grin. "I got done with my paperwork early, so I thought I'd — whew, what DIED in here?"
Hinata's face flushed bright crimson, and she meekly slapped a hand over her fuming ass. Before she could fess up to being a stinky farting housewife, her son took care of clearing the air on her behalf.
Imagine a shut-in eating something bad and getting such horrible, rotten farts that they actually force them to go outside to get some fresh air.
These farts are toxic enough to make them gag and wheeze, and to escape the accumulation left in their room, they must brave the outside world and touch grass while their body forcibly airs itself out. Hopefully the grass won't wilt right in their fingers from how horrific the stench surrounding them is getting.
Hey do you have an imagine for car farts? Maybe 2 people ripping ass in the car together possibly trying to one up each other?
Thanks for the ask!
I was originally thinking of a fart contest, but then that turned into a different idea...
A and B are both driving home after a long day, but A in the passenger seat is nursing a huge amount of gas and trying not to let it out. Eventually though, the length of the journey (and a few potholes) forces their hand, and they start to fart as quietly as possible.
As soon as B catches wind of what A's up to, they immediately reply by locking the windows. When A tries to open them, they find they're trapped with B, and immediately shoot B a dirty look, which gets ignored.
A few minutes later, A feels a much larger fart coming... except now that they know they can't even be courteous about it, they don't even bother. They just lean away from B and rip raucous ass in their direction to make them realize locking the windows was a bad idea.
But B just laughs off the fart as "not worth opening the windows for". Now feeling the desire to prove a point, A starts farting some more. Before long, A's been farting to their and B's laughter for so long that they forget they were originally trying to get the windows open. (They never were.)
I’m always such a sucker for characters who have bowel issues, to a point where most can’t stand being near them because of the smell… besides that one FREAK who loves every minute of being near them.
I love the caretaking aspect of it too, like yeah, I’ll rub your belly when it’s cramping! To which the other character, never having someone offer to help them with this before, is aghast.
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