Me, after seven months in therapy: I've realized it wasn't my responsibility to take care of my ex-boyfriend's physical and mental health. I understand now if someone isn't willing to help themselves, you can't help them either.
Jumin Han, who has never dated, never gone to therapy and wants to build a building with a statue of his cat:
Contrary to popular belief, Jumin is good at responding with empathy when it comes to those he's close with, such as his best friend. Case in point:
He tells V it's okay to cry, notices how not fine he's been doing, provides a safe space for him to open up, and validates his feelings.
The way he decides to believe V in Yoosung's route because he thought about how hard it would be for V if no one believes him
And understanding why V might not disclose the secret to him but still worrying about his wellbeing nonetheless. Jumin wouldn't be able to do this if he didn't have any shred of empathy.
Jumin has empathy and emotional intelligence. It's just easier and more comfortable for him to utilise them with someone he trusts deeply and has known for a long time.
June baby I'm trying to romance you because the plot says so but you're making it hard by constantly bringing up Jumin like. I know I'm supposed to reassure him that it's his own uniqueness that attracted me to him BUT JUMIN IS RIGHT THERE AND JUNE'S INFERIORITY COMPLEX IS NOT HELPING.
Actually tearing up thinking about Jumin saying he didn't have any friends in childhood and that everyone who approached him did it timidly because their parents asked them to in order to get to the chairman
oh my god I KNEW he said this but nobody ever seemed to back me up on it and I couldn't figure out where he'd mentioned it so I was starting to genuinely believe I had made it up. feeling vindicated
when I was writing my post about normal end a million years ago I was trying so hard to find the proof of him saying this and I just could not for the life of me figure out where it was but I knew in my heart that it was legitimate knowledge I had stashed away for a reason
Hi! Idk if you've done something like this before but if it's okay, could i ask for a comfort from Jumin? My body dysmorphia issues went out of control lately and I'm just having a hard time looking at the mirror without feeling like breaking down and just panic in general. I just want to hide away from the world so no one can judge my body anymore and say nasty shit about the way i look and what i wear or my size whether I'm too big and just ugly
Jumin understands what it feels like to be under scrutiny from the rest of the world. It happens when you grew up the way he did. It's tough out there, even if he doesn't admit it. Of course, he has dealt with it his entire life and the way he has decided to go along with it is to brush it off like it's nothing. That's not healthy but when you came into his life he realized he needed to stop compressing everything down in the bottom of his chest and ignoring it.
Even someone in a place of privilege is allowed to struggle and have insecurities, his consciousness of the situation and how other people have it worse than him is something to be spoken about, but it's just as important to remind him that he's allowed to admit that he needs help sometimes. Your kindness is what has made a difference in that line of thinking.
You can be honest with him when you're having a bad time. Isn't that what you told him? If you're worried about people talking about you behind your back, you don't need to worry about that. Nobody in this world is going to say something ugly about you and get away with it. Sure, he can't stop people from saying what they want to say, but he can stop them from saying things in the public eye.
You are his partner and that means he is committed to you no matter what comes next. He is more than willing to gush about you and Elizabeth. He is that guy who has pictures filling up his wallet to the brim. He loves his family, what can he say?
But don't think he hasn't noticed how you don't like to take pictures and how you avoid mirrors. He's a perceptive man and you knew that when you met him. He's not going to pressure you to talk about something you don't want to talk about, but at the same time, he doesn't want you to waste away and wallow in insecure feelings when it's important to talk about them so you can overcome that feeling. Beating these feelings down is always easier said than done but it gets easier when you have somebody you love.
He's here for you, and if you need to break it down in his arms, go ahead and do it.
Sure, he understands that there are beauty standards in this world that aren't kind to anyone, and seeing how much it eats away at you makes him want to do more for society to put a stop to it all. He doesn't want to see you suffer, and he doesn't want to see anybody else suffer from these feelings of self-loathing.
You shouldn't be surprised when I say that he would talk to Zen about this feeling. Yes, he'll talk to you to find out the core problem that you have to deal with, but this is Jumin we're talking about. Once he has a subject in mind, he's going to do whatever he can to learn as much as he can... and, you know, Zen is overcompensating by complementing himself because words have power.
The more you say something, the more you believe in it, and the more you call yourself beautiful, the more likely you are to put some weight into that value in comparison to calling yourself trash. He is out of his element when it comes to knowing the right thing to say, and he's willing to admit that. He wants to better understand what makes you feel that way and how he can adapt in the moment to help you build your self confidence the way that Zen has built his.
Once he feels more comfortable, he's going to do something about this on a larger scale, but what you need is something at home for you to feel better, and he's the one to make sure that happens soon. He is thoughtful and methodical in the way he approaches you after your bad day. He cups your cheek with his hand and sighs, happy to be home with you, even if you need to sob into his embrace.
"My dear, I understand that my words may not counterbalance or even overcome what you think of yourself. I recognize that these are issues that don't disappear with a few kind words, but I want you to know that you are beautiful, witty, and everything I could have ever hoped for in a partner. Being able to face the world with you at my side brings me confidence... confidence I had not known until I met you and decided to be myself. Your beauty is more than your looks, but I know saying so may feel like I'm trying to avoid calling you the words you fear most, but that is not the case," he'd whisper with love in his eyes.
"Your smile lights up my world. Your hands warm my cold heart to the surface. When I feel the weight of your body lean into my arms, all I can think about is how wonderful it is to know your body intimately. Seeing you waiting for me at the end of the day is all I could ever want and dream of. Your beauty is leagues about what you value in yourself, and I hope one day I can help you see that."
Yk one time i came across this reddit post (which i had eventually came across multiple times) and there the op talks about her now husband whom she has always known to be very logical cold stoic and unemotional.
But on the day of their marriage he was the most soppiest person she had ever seen, he cried alot (happy tears ofc) and his gestures were very heart melting.
Whenever i remember that post i think of jumin. I cant help but think it is so jumin like oh god.
Hmm, I see your point, but Jumin is very far from stoic and unemotional when it comes to his MC, actually! :D He's honestly almost on par with GE Saeran with just how openly doting and affectionate he really is with you. I mean, here's a lovely compilation of him being all lovey-dovey with you. Openly and proudly. Keep in mind, this is in chats, and this is in his route. This is not from calls where you can be more romantic with every member, nor is this from his after ending or Valentines dlc where they are all lovey-dovey in some capacity, since you are already in an established relationship. No, this is Jumin in the chatrooms:
Jumin is stupidly adoring with his MC. He doesn't hide his affections, almost to a fault. I mean, he kisses you right in front of Sarah! Sure, a part of him did it to prove a point, but he openly expresses that he wanted to do it. He just goes for it.
Jumin has a lot of love and affection to give once he finds someone who he feels safe to give it to. It's honestly not surprising, and it's the same situation as is with Saeran. When you grow up without much love given, once you get an opportunity to share it with someone who you feel safe and happy with... you will do so tenfold. Off topic, but that's why I adore his friendship with Saeran so much! They have quite a lot in common.
Jumin will get emotional on your wedding day, there is no doubt about it. But he makes sure that you feel loved by him on every other day of your shared lives as well. Remember, Jumin believes in expressing his feelings to his loved ones daily, not just on special events.
In other words: Jumin is an affectionate sweetheart, and he's not ashamed to show it!
So, you know in that infamous chat on Day 7 between the MC, Jumin and Zen, where Zen is freaking out bc Jumin is being lowkey horny in the groupchat ? Yeah, so, there's kind of a huge detail that was lost in the English version.
At one point, Zen tells Jumin to take MC back home and adds "don't be pervy and make her stay", to which Jumin replies "Don't assume that all men are like you. But more than that, what do you mean 'pervy' ? I never had such intentions. What in the world is inside your head !"
...only to completely contradict that like 2 texts later (if the MC says she's glad he's not denying the fact that he did indeed have thoughts™, which again, is really weird to have as an option after Jumin supposedly says he "never had such intentions") by saying he's been having inappropriate thoughts ever since MC arrived.
Well. That's because that's not what he tells Zen in the Korean version. He doesn't say "I never had such intentions". This is how this part of the conversation actually goes.
Zen : Hurry up and take her home! This is an inappropriate hour to be with a lady!
MC : I don't mind staying, though?
Jumin : If MC wants to stay, then she can stay.
Zen : What are you talking about? Even if she wants to stay, a real man should escort her home.
Jumin : Why should I force her to leave?
Zen : Because you're a man.
Jumin : You shouldn't assume all men are like you. But more importantly, why do you keep calling it an "inappropriate hour"? Do you have inappropriate thoughts only after a certain time? I wonder what's going on in your head.
Jumin isn't wondering what kind of thoughts Zen is having. He knows. No, the thing he doesn't understand is why Zen keeps acting like men are supposedly only having thoughts™ after a certain time and that's really weird to him. And I swear ever since I played that chat in Korean, it's been living in my mind completely rent-free.
Thinking about early relationship Jumin... He gets used to coming home to you after his routine goes back go normal. There's soft "Will you be staying here tonight?" conversations in the evenings where he doesn't quite want to assume but also doesn't want to be alone. You're not even sure when it happened but there's permanently perfume beside his cologne and hair ties in the bathroom cabinet and two toothbrushes in his en-suite. As you bond with Elizabeth the 3rd his adoration only grows. He takes a load of unsteady photos the first time she sleeps on your lap or cuddles up to you; texts you pictures of her with a "We miss you" message when you aren't there for a couple of days. You finally manage to convince him you don't need Driver Kim to take you home every time but he still insists on walking you to the bus or train station (if not just to spend a little bit of extra time with you). Leaving is always followed up by too-formal messages to check you got home safe. There's nights where both of you can't sleep alone and he says enough and comes over at midnight so you can squeeze into bed together and actually get some rest even if it means pushing back a morning schedule or two. His mood totally shifts for the better the first time you pay a surprise visit to his office and it hits you all at once how much being around each other is so good for the both of you. You can hear the fondness in his voice at business events where he gets to introduce you as his fiancée and feel his pride when you get comfortable and blend in. You belong together, he thinks, plain and simple. Little parts of your lifestyles become intertwined and it feels so natural. He teaches you his pancake recipe and watches diligently if you cook for him in turn. Subconsciously you start picking up on each other's little habits. As you learn what the other likes touches are soft and hesitant and then one day they're passionate and purposeful and you don't even know when things clicked. Kisses are always "Just one more?" with him because he can never get enough of you. The first time someone assumes you're married before you actually are and you don't correct them he brings it up later – his wife? He can't wait to get used to that. And it all feels a bit surreal for a while, but he's always always there to ground you
↪ SFW, slightly suggestive at times, fluff, reader is not specified to be male nor female
— Jumin always makes an effort to cook breakfast for you, even if he has a chef. His mornings are one of the only times he gets to fully spend time with you, so he makes sure he cherishes and takes full advantage of that time.
— Doesn't mind getting called Cat Mom/Dad after getting together with you because technically, you are also Elizabeth's Cat Mom/Dad which means both of you are married and have a child. (I feel like he would think like that, idk why.)
— Loves doing chores with you.
— If you are doing dishes on their own, he will make sure to wrap his arms around your waist and sway a bit and kiss your neck sweetly.
— Jumin makes a big effort to know about your interests. If you like anime, they will make sure to watch the summaries on YouTube of their favourite anime everytime a new episode comes out. If you like painting, they will learn about the best museums to bring you to.
— Loves when you dress traditionally.
— Will buy a vinyl and various disks with elegant music and play it every night. When both of you are in the mood, Jumin will invite you to dance and twirl you about softly while kissing you.
— His kisses normally follow the pattern of Hands —> Arms —> Shoulders —> Neck —> Jaw —> Cheeks —> Nose —> Forehead —> Lips. He makes sure to take a lot of time so you feel good.
— Although he loves the passionate kisses you give, he finds himself falling in love with you even more everytime you kiss and squeeze his hands at the same time. (BONUS POINTS FOR KISSES ON KNUCKLES)
— Dislikes it when you turn away from him in bed. He prefers sleeping while facing each other, cuddling too.
— A lot of different sleeping positions (not like that, get your mind out of the gutter): his head on your shoulders/heads/chest or your head on his chest. He especially likes when you cuddle closer if it's too cold and Bury yourself into his chest.
— Loves when you wash his hair in the bath or vice versa. (Inspired by that one wholesome reddit post. Does anyone know whether that couple is still together?)
— Likes to put his hand under your shirt to trace your spine, collarbone or any bones, really.
— His Favourite Nicknames for you are 'My Queen, Lover, Darling, Sweetheart.'
— You're the only one he allows to call Elizabeth, 'Elly'. He doesn't like to admit it but he also catches him calling Elizabeth 'Elly' at times.
— Loves to see you playing with Elizabeth.
— After a stressful day of work, he will silently drop everything at the door and bury his head into your chest.
— If he ever finds you crying, he will kiss and lick the tears from your eyes.
— Whenever he sees a photo of you on an online article or anywhere in the Media, he will complain that they cannot capture the 'True essence of your beauty.'
I really hate that some people still have the tendency to make Jumin out to be clueless about everything outside of his job. Like you can't take the fact he grew up sheltered and isn't tech savvy and go ‘okay, bad at everything, got it.’ Those things don't mitigate the fact he's smart enough to be a member of Mensa, incredibly observant, has an extraordinary memory, speaks multiple languages, plays multiple instruments, AND is incredibly witty. He has a huge breadth of knowledge, please give him some credit
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