As Logic Dictates

TFP Shockwave Ask Blog

[highglossfinish]

What's with that hose connecting Shockwave's cannon to his back? Seems impractical. I'd ask him but he's been rather scarce lately. Same with Ratchet. They alright?

That’s his logic hose. It’s where the logic is stored, naturally. 

In the hose.

[as-logic-dictates]

Nonsense. That would be akin to you storing your personality inside your pauldrons.

To answer the question, the cord connected to my cannon served as an energon conduit and amplification mechanism. By bypassing the relatively narrow fuel structures present within the limb, then allowing that fuel to cycle at high frequency, I was able to more efficiently achieve a maximized destructive potential.

[omnia-volo]

[slenderwave]

as-logic-dictates

For the record: I haven’t.

If this is insufficiently convincing, you are welcome to confirm the details in person.

[[A good spy always confirms outside reports.]]

And it’s been a while since he’s seen Shockwave. Convenient excuse!

[as-logic-dictates]

If that is customary for a ‘good’ spy, then I expect nothing less from one of the best.

Send a notification once you are available. There is undoubtedly much to discuss-- and you may find it amusing to revisit the Predacon hatchlings, now that they are capable of rudimentary communication.

[as-logic-dictates]

a-good-distraction replied to your post: I think I know what's wrong with me.

You’re a riot.

I detect a high concentration of sarcasm. 

[as-logic-dictates]

I would compare you to a Summer's day. 2nd July 2005, Newcastle Upon Time, about half one in the afternoon BST. It was grey and rainy, and cold, and everyone had the hoods on their jackets up which made them look like they were cyclopses.

Better.

[as-logic-dictates]

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? No, thou art more lovely and more temperate. Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, and summer's lease has all too short a date. But thy eternal summer shall not fade, nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st <333

I am not particularly interested in poetry. 

I am, however, moderately interested in reading comprehension and the general preservation of literature. You do this human author a disservice by omitting content which is critical both to the original metric structure and the work’s intended message.

[as-logic-dictates]

I think I know what's wrong with me.

Is that so?

I thought the factors were too numerous to list.

[as-logic-dictates]

Holoform question. How independently pilotable are they? That is, if you wanted to deal with a human or human-scale organism at roughly their size, could you use a holographic projection to do so? Would you need portable projectors, like from Star Trek Voyager, if you wanted to move them any distance away from your main body? Thanks!

It varies.

In my universe, the ‘standard’ holoform serves largely as one small aspect of our innate disguise mechanisms. They are intended to deflect suspicion, not engage in sophisticated action at a distance from our frames. 

For a price, some individuals elected to enhance this program with modified coding and additional emitters-- external or otherwise. This proved especially useful in ambassadorial matters and espionage, though I am certain that it was also utilized by various... hobbyists. Even so, there is a maximum range at which the process becomes impractical to maintain.

In other universes, this extended functionality may be more common.

[as-logic-dictates]

But doesn't Bumblebee have his helm face down on his vehicle mode's underside, exposed to road dirt, kicked up gravel, tree branches, rocks, and Eradicon-placed fusion powered IEDs?

...Amusing.

Typically, there is at least one layer of paneling placed between the helm and the vehicle’s underside, to prevent this issue from occurring.

It is possible that the Bumblebee you reference was in a state of disrepair, leading to a shortage of protective material-- but as I am not the one who conceptualized his alt format, I take no responsibility for any egregious oversights in design. 

[highglossfinish]

My altmode is a sphere, how could this happen? Why did my tcog do this to me?

It’s not your t-cog’s job to screen your potential alt-modes for functionality and bad decision making. If it were, aquatic alts wouldn’t exist.

[slenderwave]

[[There is nothing wrong with aquatic alt modes.]]

[highglossfinish]

Why so defensive, Soundwave? You’ve never cared about my easy shots at them before.

…

Oh! So who’s the lucky submersible?

[slenderwave]

[[He acknowledges his past mistakes.]]

[[And unless Shockwave has reformatted himself during his latest laboratory run, no one is.]]

[as-logic-dictates]

For the record: I haven’t.

If this is insufficiently convincing, you are welcome to confirm the details in person.

[as-logic-dictates]

You misunderstand my question to the Red Doc, Science Boss. I meant that in 40,000 stellar cycles and your spank bank material never went past the basics, because you've probably got the creativity of a Terrorcon on sedatives. Creativity doesn't seem to go well with your logic focus. And there's nothing wrong with the classics; Megatron's rewards and Soundwave's tentacles are stuff we've all thought about voluntarily or not.

I have revolutionized entire scientific fields. Transformed the concept of combination from rare, limited instances of symbiosis, to an evolution of our species. Solved countless ‘unsolvable’ problems in peacetime and war alike.

I suffer from no lack of creativity.

At this point, it seems like ‘rewards and tentacles’ have been brought to my attention more since joining this website than across the entirety of my lifetime. That says more about the greyfaces than it says about me.

[highglossfinish]

While we're on the subject of Shockwave tripping his switch, how often do you suppose he rubbed one out over Megatron returning to Cybertron and "rewarding" him with some interior polishing? Alone for 40,000 stellar cycles and all, how creative was Chief Science Guy getting back there?

I think your very wrong image of Starscream and your very wrong image of me are bleeding into your perception of Shockwave.

With just a dash of “probably not entirely wrong” image of Soundwave.

[as-logic-dictates]

As a pornographic scenario, ‘Megatron rewards his loyal Decepticon’ is hardly ‘creative’.

[a-good-distraction]

Yeah, but it’s classic. You can’t go wrong. Don’t act like you haven’t thought about it.

[as-logic-dictates]

Acting is not required.

[a-good-distraction]

Really? Not even once?

[as-logic-dictates]

Is it so difficult to imagine a life in which interface is not a significant source of motivation?

[as-logic-dictates]

I'm sorry if this has been asked before, but what ARE Predaking's wings made of? I've only gotten visual glimpses from various Decepticon footage that got leaked, but it seems entirely unique to every other winged Cybertronian I've seen. They're more pliable and less sectioned-off than other Cybertronian wings I've seen.

Predaking’s wings are not necessarily unique among his species, but you are correct to note that most available points of comparison tend toward segmented metallic phenotypes.

The membrane in question is composed of inorganic fibers, with moderate elasticity and high tensile strength. Your species has yet to synthesize an equivalent substance— but one might think of it as a thicker, naturally-structured polyethylene naphthalate.

Such material is not impermeable to damage, but Predaking’s self-repair systems are capable of knitting most minor punctures closed. If significant injury was incurred, I could assist his recovery through a number of methods, including sutures, grafts, or in the worst case, prosthetics.

[as-logic-dictates]

Math question: If you (with one optic) scanned a spider (which has 8 optics), how many optics would you have?

In all likelihood? Nine. One for root mode, and eight for the alt.

The Cybertronian helm is a complicated and vulnerable structure— it is more common to see it tucked away for protection than reused in both modes.

[highglossfinish]

There will be no statues of any of us, the Predacons will wipe us all out once they become numerous enough. We have to take the fight to them first.

In that case, the Cybertronian contribution will live on in the form of a statue of Shockwave, standing tall and brandishing a gynecological instrument.

[as-logic-dictates]

As the situation stands, that is perhaps the only way my post-war contributions will be publicly recognized.

A small statue of my likeness was once erected in the library of the first academy to hire me as a lecturer.

The shape of my nose was incorrect.

[highglossfinish]

While we're on the subject of Shockwave tripping his switch, how often do you suppose he rubbed one out over Megatron returning to Cybertron and "rewarding" him with some interior polishing? Alone for 40,000 stellar cycles and all, how creative was Chief Science Guy getting back there?

I think your very wrong image of Starscream and your very wrong image of me are bleeding into your perception of Shockwave.

With just a dash of “probably not entirely wrong” image of Soundwave.

[as-logic-dictates]

As a pornographic scenario, ‘Megatron rewards his loyal Decepticon’ is hardly ‘creative’.

[a-good-distraction]

Yeah, but it’s classic. You can’t go wrong. Don’t act like you haven’t thought about it.

[as-logic-dictates]

Acting is not required.

[highglossfinish]

While we're on the subject of Shockwave tripping his switch, how often do you suppose he rubbed one out over Megatron returning to Cybertron and "rewarding" him with some interior polishing? Alone for 40,000 stellar cycles and all, how creative was Chief Science Guy getting back there?

I think your very wrong image of Starscream and your very wrong image of me are bleeding into your perception of Shockwave.

With just a dash of “probably not entirely wrong” image of Soundwave.

[as-logic-dictates]

As a pornographic scenario, ‘Megatron rewards his loyal Decepticon’ is hardly ‘creative’.