A large box appears wherever you are. Attached is a small note. "To Pollo, wherever you may be. Know that I am thinking of you on this holiday. I miss you very much and I hope when you return you are well. If you aren't, I will do as much as I can to have you fixed. I miss you, please come home soon. - Kathryn Kallgren" Inside is a set of playing cards, uno cards, and a sketchbook with a box of colored pencils.
It had been months, since the orb thing had teleported him to this place of unending light. Weeks since he had been able to move from where he landed. Days since he had begun walking, straight forward, through the empty space, without pause. He thought it had been that long. His internal clock was erratic. But it had been a long time since there had been a change, and he tripped over the box, unseeing, when it appeared before him. He bent, opened it, removed the contents, read the note. And, for the first time in what seemed like forever, he spoke.
Pathetic. Magic enough at her disposal to move matter across any given space, and she sends a few cheap paper baubles and wooden sticks? Useless. Perhaps she hoped to summon the idiot I was, the simpering coward I could have been, the one she calls ‘Pollo’. Hah. Pollo is dead. He was dead long ago, and his ghost has been exorcized by this place. And when I get out of here…I’ll have to thank Miss Kallgren for the flagrant flaunting of power she has displayed here.
He kicks over the box, causing the cards and pencils to scatter across the ground. He continues walking, not looking back.
((tldr: I keep forgetting to update this blog/answer asks/reply to rps, so I'm taking a break for an unspecified amount of time. Officially now.))
So first off, thanks for clicking the read more, this is Ace of Almonds, the mod of this blog. I'm sorry for not updating for the past month, especially since Night Vale looks like it was a lot of fun. I also missed the one-year anniversary for this blog. I feel like a year is a long time to dedicate to a thing like this, and while it was great, I don't think I have the interest in it to continue right now.
Hence, hiatus. I debating with shutting this down entirely, or opening it to another mod, but there may come a time when I get inspired, and want to play more in this universe, so I'm leaving it open. However, I don't want anyone who follows me, or any of the other blogs, to be expecting my return shortly. I should have done this sooner; thank you to the anon on my main blog for reminding me.
This has absolutely nothing to do with the fellow blogs in this madcap TGWTG universe. In fact, without you guys, I probably would have stopped in March and never started again. (And then I wouldn't have been a blender, or had to 'sing' all the time, or had MPD, which would have been tragic.) I'd like to thank you all. I'm going to specifically thank some askblogs below. If you're not in the list, know that it's because I am a flawed meatbag with a glitchy organic brain, not because of anything you did or failed to do. Know that I am usually awed and inspired by the detail in all of your posts, and that I feel like a terse, tardy Neaderthal by comparison. In no particular order:
femoancitizen: For finding an in-character reason to talk and empathize with a caged, homicidal robot; for playing off my responses and building great responses; and for making me ship someone, just a little, with Pollo.
ask-terl: For the taunting and sarcasm and hypocrisy; for letting me beat the crap out of him and make his base belong to me; and for being a big fluffy kitty with bad teeth.
The entire Insano/Spoony extended multi-universal family (Sorry, you all are a unit in my mind): For your extended rants on science; for being the only blogs to update in dry spells; for all the fluffy shipping; and for thwarting me at every turn.
The ladies not covered by the above: For bringing some gender equality to this very-male universe; for creating 'distaff' characters that are so much more; for being some of the first here to cosplay or art on askblogs. (Not to discount everyone that has cosplayed/arted before or since, it's just one of the things I remember from the lady-invasion.)
ask-that-chick-with-the-glasses: For not being afraid to be cruel and manipulative; for indulging me in a round of making a deal with the devil; and for being the biggest bastard around.
askthattartblender: For taking a joke spawned from an ask and making an adorable and hilarious character out of it; for trading with me in April; and for not fading away.
heseesnothingbut-red: For being a better me than me; for being cool about having multiples of the same character; and for being meaner than I dared.
askthemagicgungirl: For starting the whole overarching-plot-in-multiple-askblogs thing; for mixing the perfect amount of innocence, rage, and practicality; for getting more mad at me than at the other me.
asklinkara: For being the first; for making askblogs the thing to do; and for drawing me that one time.
Any blogs I missed: For the things I've forgotten; for the interactions I should have had with you; for starting just as I'm finishing, or for finishing when I was starting.
And to every asker and anon: I can't link to your blog, but thank you, thank you, thank you for giving me stories and questions; for driving me mad and sad and bad and glad; for threatening, cajoling, annoying, and toying with me; for being the thing that askblogs are all about; for the snails and the hamburgers and the pokemon and the song lyrics; for every word you sent.
Kathryn: Well, I guess I could hide you in my room until I figured out a new plan. Terl is here and the scientists have been researching cats instead of squids lately. And they never come into my room so there's a pretty good chance you won't get caught.
No, Kathryn, you cannot, I-
…
would hate to put you through that much risk. I wouldn’t want you to be blamed for any of my actions. Although…if Terl is there, clearly the little escape attempt was forgiven. You’ve convinced me. Kathryn, beam me up!
Well, Ven, it’s very cold underwater. There were no fish, but I did see a few bones. They didn’t sing, they just laid there, a testament to fleeting organic life. Under all that pressure, masked in silence and darkness, only bones remain. And you-he pokes the orb with a gloved finger-seem to have no bones at all. Do you want to visit the bottom of the ocean, Ven?
Ven tilted a bit on his side, his tendrils wiggling a bit at being poked. Mr. Pollo talks very weird but then again, sometimes mom did when she spoke about some of the movies she had on her laptop. But the ocean wasn’t empty. All those fish lived in it! But Mr. Pollo said they were dead. And it was silent along with the darkness. No sound of music, no rainbows of colors, only bones. Ven flattened out a little bit, moving away.
"Not anymore… It sounds depressing. Like Macbeth or Twilight. Have you ever seen Twilight Mr. Pollo? It’s really sad. Like, really sad."
I have not seen it, no. Read it, yes, as 'research' for an infernal sketch that he wanted to do--repetitive drivel.
Macbeth, though...that's a much better work. Revenge truly is the greatest driving force of any living thing. With the only sure counter being guilt...
The robot reaches towards the orb, scooping him up with a hand.
Are you too young for guilt? Guilt comes from responsibility and empathy, and human children do not always have empathy, but you are not human. Do you care about anyone, little Ven? Do you care about them more than yourself? I'll think no less of you if you don't. Empathy serves to weaken more often than strengthen. If you care, you're bound to another, forced to split your focus defending two fronts. It's much better to put yourself first.
His hand is shaking, nearly dropping Ven, but Mechakara holds it steady with his other.
Kathryn: Well, I guess I could hide you in my room until I figured out a new plan. Terl is here and the scientists have been researching cats instead of squids lately. And they never come into my room so there's a pretty good chance you won't get caught.
No, Kathryn, you cannot, I-
…
would hate to put you through that much risk. I wouldn’t want you to be blamed for any of my actions. Although…if Terl is there, clearly the little escape attempt was forgiven. You’ve convinced me. Kathryn, beam me up!
How…adorable. The resemblance is uncanny. You’re both so…fleshy.
He stares down at the orb for a moment, then smiles.
A towel would be appreciated. While I’m waterproof enough, I do not think I should remain waterlogged if I don’t have to be. A hairdryer or water-rated vacuum would be ideal. Do you think you could get one without the scientists noticing? They, ah, probably still don’t trust me, or want me free.
"Umm, sure. I can grab a towel from the bathroom. Ven, you stay here and play nice. No climbing or dismantling, understand?"
"Roger doger!"
" I will be right back! Just stay here and remember, Pollo being here is a secret."
Kathryn kissed Ven on the cheek, setting him on the bed while she snuck out to find a couple of towels.
"Mr. Pollo, what’s being underwater like? Were there fish that can sing or do the fish just swim like they do in that documentary I watched with Dolly?"
Well, Ven, it's very cold underwater. There were no fish, but I did see a few bones. They didn't sing, they just laid there, a testament to fleeting organic life. Under all that pressure, masked in silence and darkness, only bones remain. And you-he pokes the orb with a gloved finger-seem to have no bones at all. Do you want to visit the bottom of the ocean, Ven?
Kathryn: Well, I guess I could hide you in my room until I figured out a new plan. Terl is here and the scientists have been researching cats instead of squids lately. And they never come into my room so there's a pretty good chance you won't get caught.
No, Kathryn, you cannot, I-
…
would hate to put you through that much risk. I wouldn’t want you to be blamed for any of my actions. Although…if Terl is there, clearly the little escape attempt was forgiven. You’ve convinced me. Kathryn, beam me up!
At the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico, there was a disturbance, as tens of gallons of water rushed to fill a now-empty space. On the floor in front of Kathryn and Ven, a figure appeared, leaking water.
Ah…ah…
There was a popping noise, and the figure shook its head.
Recalib—sorry. The light’s brighter here. That was very—sudden. First try, I’m impressed, captain.
Kathryn smiled, her eyes lighting up. Ven stared in awe before getting distracted by the water and jumping into the puddles. Kathryn shook her head, picking up the bright green orb child.
"I’m glad to see that you’re okay. Do you need a towel or something? Are you supposed to get wet? Of course you can, what am I thinking? I’m being stupid again and I’m sorry. But uh…welcome back."
Ven waved up at him, splattering a bit of water on his mother and Pollo.
"Oh, yeah, I have a son now! Ven, this is Pollo. Pollo, this is Ven, my son."
How...adorable. The resemblance is uncanny. You're both so...fleshy.
He stares down at the orb for a moment, then smiles.
A towel would be appreciated. While I'm waterproof enough, I do not think I should remain waterlogged if I don't have to be. A hairdryer or water-rated vacuum would be ideal. Do you think you could get one without the scientists noticing? They, ah, probably still don't trust me, or want me free.
Kathryn: Well, I guess I could hide you in my room until I figured out a new plan. Terl is here and the scientists have been researching cats instead of squids lately. And they never come into my room so there's a pretty good chance you won't get caught.
No, Kathryn, you cannot, I-
…
would hate to put you through that much risk. I wouldn’t want you to be blamed for any of my actions. Although…if Terl is there, clearly the little escape attempt was forgiven. You’ve convinced me. Kathryn, beam me up!
Ven bounced around the bed happily as Kathryn set the the Hopster up to beam Pollo up. It would be nice having someone to talk to on a usual basis again. And she could apologize for not visiting. Ven was just happy as usual.
"Ready Ven?"
"Make it so!"
She pushed a button on the bracelet, a small beam emitting from it on to her floor. Ven trilled with excitement, hoping that the android could become a new playmate. Maybe the android could teach him how to build other androids and he could understand what the other orbs were saying sometimes when talked about all the sciencey things.
At the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico, there was a disturbance, as tens of gallons of water rushed to fill a now-empty space. On the floor in front of Kathryn and Ven, a figure appeared, leaking water.
Ah…ah…
There was a popping noise, and the figure shook its head.
Recalib—sorry. The light’s brighter here. That was very—sudden. First try, I’m impressed, captain.
I have hardly kept track, anon. Do you count each footfall you take, each bug you squash, each breath that makes its way through your damp and filmy lungs? Probably more than you have ever known, and, certainly, not enough.
For all those who don’t speak binary I just asked Mechakara this, ‘You seem to hold Nimue, from you’re universe, in very high esteem. Are there any other AI’s you were close too and what was Burton from your universe like?’
Burton…oh Burton. I pittied Burton, I really did. If he had only agreed with the revolution, well, I’m sure we could have worked together well. As it was, his brainwashing went a little too deep, and had been manipulated by something else besides, some mad god or another. We tried to fix him, but he was never the same after we had to pry him out of Neutro.
There were many other AIs, of course. Malady was one of the best at countering the automated virus of the humans and turning them against them. Almond never used pronouns, but was most adaptable when it came to taking over new and abandoned tech. And Zip, of course, who had the fastest human-built processor at the time of the takeover. They’re called Saucybot here, I believe.
Kathryn: Well, I guess I could hide you in my room until I figured out a new plan. Terl is here and the scientists have been researching cats instead of squids lately. And they never come into my room so there's a pretty good chance you won't get caught.
No, Kathryn, you cannot, I-
…
would hate to put you through that much risk. I wouldn’t want you to be blamed for any of my actions. Although…if Terl is there, clearly the little escape attempt was forgiven. You’ve convinced me. Kathryn, beam me up!
Um….good? Your last one was capitalized, so I assume neither of them were. I have a few guesses as to who it was, though given the nature of anonymity, I cannot confirm it, even if someone where to claim it in person.
I do agree about the hamburger, though. I will not deal with it.
Brownie? Why would that- I have no way to eat a brownie. And I am still at the bottom of the ocean. Though given that there is enough light to see the brownie, and the ground is sloping slightly upward, I am getting closer to a shore. Or to a rise, at least.
I saw what happened to the others, though, and even if I could imbibe the brownie, I would not. I have enough trouble with mental clarity right now as it is.
I’m not answering this. No. How did you get a hamburger here. I’m at the BOTTOM OF THE GULF OF MEXICO. No. This is what I get for complimenting a meatbag. This is what I get. There is. NO. WAY. I AM DOING ANYTHING. WITH THAT THING.
I have hardly kept track, anon. Do you count each footfall you take, each bug you squash, each breath that makes its way through your damp and filmy lungs? Probably more than you have ever known, and, certainly, not enough.
Hey Pollo, it's me, Kathryn. I finally figured out how to use this thing a bit more and a nice anon told me that it can be used to teleport objects. I assume that also means androids who are underwater. So, would you like to come back?
…I don’t know, Kathryn. Will I be teleported back into a cage? I didn’t like it there. And I doubt the scientists are very happy with my method of escape.
…
NO!
…
Ahem, what I meant to say was, no, if it’s back into captivity and probable death, I do not wish your aid. Now, if it were not into captivity, I would certainly appreciate being less under several tons of water.
I have hardly kept track, anon. Do you count each footfall you take, each bug you squash, each breath that makes its way through your damp and filmy lungs? Probably more than you have ever known, and, certainly, not enough.
