DR. BRUCE BANNER

-walks into the room with his head down- Tony, you realize that the quantum d… -looks up, quite perplexed by Sif and Thor- I. Um. Anyone want tea?

Oh, about damn time. Party, bro, have a slice. -hands his friend a brownie, a large, goofy grin on his face- Sure, tea sounds fine, booze better. Get some Absolut out, this is a real party now.

Oh, hello, Banner. -smiles and waves- How are you this evening?

#dear-tony-stark #ask-lady-sif #ask-thor-son-of-odin #trigger warning #alcohol usage #drug usage

-turns his back to get tea and/or vodka, but continues to converse with Sif over his shoulder- Hello, Sif. I'm fine. How're you?

ask-thor-son-of-odin-blog

-Nods happily munching on the brownie- This is indeed excellent Stark. This pizza creation is the best food of Migard. -raises an eyebrow- Do you possibly have one of those menu papers?

Next to poptarts, huh? Glad I keep those in stock. Yeah, here. -tosses him one, finishing off his own brownie while tinkering with a small piece of machinery that looked similar to an eyeball- I know already what I’mma get. Feel free to get as much as you need. Where’s your lady friend? She said she liked the brownies last time…

I was told that you inquired about me?

Yeah. Here, I baked brownies again. -hands her one, smile on his face, goggles strapped around his neck- Cop a squat next to Thunderbutt, we’re gonna order chinese.

Wonderful! -takes the brownie- Erm…Chinese? -asks between nibbles-

#dear-tony-stark #ask-lady-sif #ask-thor-son-of-odin #trigger warning #drug usage

-walks into the room with his head down- Tony, you realize that the quantum d... -looks up, quite perplexed by Sif and Thor- I. Um. Anyone want tea?

I have no excuse for this.

Er…might I ask what brought on this particular choice in attire?

Tony, what the hell are you doing?

Uh… I may or may not be really stoned. Not sure…

Think the Cap likes crossdressing?

#dear-tony-stark #ask-lady-sif #trigger warning #drug usage

No. Tony no. Tony don't even.

feriowind

Meido Tony, just because.

I have no excuse for this.

Er…might I ask what brought on this particular choice in attire?

#dear-tony-stark #ask-lady-sif

Tony, what the hell are you doing?

Cap had a nice birthday.

-grins- Maybe I should get you a basket of kittens. Hairless ones that look like little old men. And hey! -steals the bottle from Tony, taking a swig as well- I think we’ve had enough heart-to-heart crap for one night.

Pffft, nah. These guys are enough trouble as is. -lifts Apollo, touching the kitten’s nose with his own- Wiggly things.

-pouting as the bottle was ganked from his hands, grabbing it back after Bruce had taken a long drink- I concur. I’ll work something out. Until then, I’ll just have to wait I suppose.

-laughs and leans into Tony's face- Hey. Hey you. -pauses for a moment, looks into his eyes, and bats him on the nose with a forefinger- Boop!

Cap had a nice birthday.

I gave him flowers for his birthday. Red roses, white carnations, and blue violets. Let’s face it, he’s impossible.

-pets the kitten, cooing, holding it in one hand, the drink in the other- This one’s my favourite. He’s so quiet. Very needy though. Always wanting lovin’s. -takes a drink, setting the bottle down on the floor, cradling the kitten close- The closest thing I’ll get to having a kid, probably.

-huffs and sits back down next to Tony, occasionally lending a scratch or pat to the kitten- You want kids, Tony? Not like I’m discouraging you or anything, it’s not like you can’t financially support all the kids of Africa. I guess I just never pegged you for the “settle-down-and-have-a-family” type.

Nah, I don’t really like kids, honestly. Besides, what would I do with one? I can barely take care of myself, how would I be able to take care of a kid? -pets the cat gently, holding him close- I’d probably be the same as my dad. No kid needs that. Stark is a good name for my family… Cold, barren. I don’t want the Stark name to be passed down. -takes a large swig of the hard alcohol, drinking it as if it were water-

-grins- Maybe I should get you a basket of kittens. Hairless ones that look like little old men. And hey! -steals the bottle from Tony, taking a swig as well- I think we've had enough heart-to-heart crap for one night.

Cap had a nice birthday.

Kinda… Steve is oblivious and I’m too fucked to ever actually have any microbial semblance of a chance. I should just marry science and get it over with. I know science won’t mourn for me though.

-groans and leans his head against Bruce- How do I make a ninety-four year old like me, Brucie?

Now Tony, science would too mourn. Or at least any good scientist or tech person out there would. As for Steve, just wait. He’ll come around eventually. He’s a hopeless romantic, so get him flowers and be spontaneous. -pets Tony’s head-

Oop, Apollo’s awake. Hold up just a minute. -goes to pick up the kitten out of his bed under Bruce’s desk, walks back with him in his arms, and drops him on Tony’s lap- Since you decided to get seven, you need to help with the babysitting.

I gave him flowers for his birthday. Red roses, white carnations, and blue violets. Let’s face it, he’s impossible.

-pets the kitten, cooing, holding it in one hand, the drink in the other- This one’s my favourite. He’s so quiet. Very needy though. Always wanting lovin’s. -takes a drink, setting the bottle down on the floor, cradling the kitten close- The closest thing I’ll get to having a kid, probably.

-huffs and sits back down next to Tony, occasionally lending a scratch or pat to the kitten- You want kids, Tony? Not like I'm discouraging you or anything, it's not like you can't financially support all the kids of Africa. I guess I just never pegged you for the "settle-down-and-have-a-family" type.

Cap had a nice birthday.

No. Go away. I was an ugly kid.

Doubt it. Not goin’ away either. -hunkers down next to him, cradling his drink carefully- Honey, why can’t I make him like meeee?

Do you want a hug or something? You seem especially clingy tonight.

Kinda… Steve is oblivious and I’m too fucked to ever actually have any microbial semblance of a chance. I should just marry science and get it over with. I know science won’t mourn for me though.

-groans and leans his head against Bruce- How do I make a ninety-four year old like me, Brucie?

#alcohol usage #dear-tony-stark #trigger warning #KIIIIIIIIIITTEEEEEEEEEEEN

Now Tony, science would too mourn. Or at least any good scientist or tech person out there would. As for Steve, just wait. He'll come around eventually. He's a hopeless romantic, so get him flowers and be spontaneous. -pets Tony's head-

Oop, Apollo's awake. Hold up just a minute. -goes to pick up the kitten out of his bed under Bruce's desk, walks back with him in his arms, and drops him on Tony's lap- Since you decided to get seven, you need to help with the babysitting.

Cap had a nice birthday.

You’re making me sound like a dog, Tony.

You’d be the cutest puppy, that’s for sure. Shame you don’t have any baby photos on you. I would have liked to see that.

No. Go away. I was an ugly kid.

Doubt it. Not goin’ away either. -hunkers down next to him, cradling his drink carefully- Honey, why can’t I make him like meeee?

Do you want a hug or something? You seem especially clingy tonight.

Cap had a nice birthday.

Flowers, cake, fireworks, the whole shebang.

I’m never gonna be able to talk to him though. The one person who ties my tongue up in knots… What the fuck.

I’m probably gonna drown myself in schnapps… That sounds like a good idea.

Hey, save some for me. I have a massive headache from all those stupid fireworks.

Poor Bruce. Sorry, I know how they get your heart racing too. Glad you didn’t let the other guy go on a rampage. I’m still working on a serum that’ll make it so you can choose when you can go and do that.

Here honey. Drink up. I know I need to drown myself in this shit.

You’re making me sound like a dog, Tony.

You’d be the cutest puppy, that’s for sure. Shame you don’t have any baby photos on you. I would have liked to see that.

#dear-tony-stark #trigger warning #alcohol usage #he was actually adorable #js

No. Go away. I was an ugly kid.

Cap had a nice birthday.

Flowers, cake, fireworks, the whole shebang.

I’m never gonna be able to talk to him though. The one person who ties my tongue up in knots… What the fuck.

I’m probably gonna drown myself in schnapps… That sounds like a good idea.

Hey, save some for me. I have a massive headache from all those stupid fireworks.

Poor Bruce. Sorry, I know how they get your heart racing too. Glad you didn’t let the other guy go on a rampage. I’m still working on a serum that’ll make it so you can choose when you can go and do that.

Here honey. Drink up. I know I need to drown myself in this shit.

You're making me sound like a dog, Tony.