establishing that you do not speak in 'passive agressive' and taking the stance that I will not accept or try to decipher what someone really means is one of the most important boundaries I've ever set, tbh. it can be awkward at first and sometimes people don't intend to be agressive but telling the people you love that you cannot and will not communicate in ways that require you to determine what they really want is...so freeing.
im genuinely being very serious about this tho, like. telling people 'hey, i cannot communicate this way and I refuse to try to understand what you really mean when you say something, if you want something from me you're going to have to ask' puts it off your shoulders to try and read between the lines.
it's not your responsibility to try and get ahead of the curve and interpret every twitch or every odd way someone says something. it's not your responsibility in a healthy relationship to interpret the tea leaves someone's tossing out in their communication so you can stay safe. you're allowed to be like 'hey, im not going to communicate like this' and it can be hard at first but eventually people really do learn how to get over themselves or past their own communication issues when you've point blank told them that if they want something they have to ask.
there's so much energy freed up when you're not spent trying to squint at subtext that might not even be there.
