I AM NOT A MORON

Ex-owner of Aperture [Wheatley] Science Innovators. Currently floating in space, ummm... yeah, that's about it. OH! And I read Machiavelli.

[zhmurrka]

Feeling funny today

[icebear4president]

The Artemis II crew filmed an 80s sitcom style video on their way to the Moon

[evilwizard]

me: *covered in scratch marks* i am still a powerful and respectable wizard, you know

my imp krongus: *doubtfully* yes, my lord

me: i did eventually kill the mouse with a needle for a sword

krongus: it’s just that it was so close, my lord

[courtesycalling]

[smashingorpassing]

Wheatley (Portal 2)

Smash

Pass

Voting ended onFeb 20, 2024

[askthemoroncore]

please do NOT smash me. I've had it happen once, it is not pleasant

[askthemoroncore]

Where've I been? Reading mostly. Playing chess. I have a whole mind palace now actually, spend a lot of time in there. More like a mind planet now! A whole galaxy even. Of minds. All for me.

So no to answer your question I'm not lonely at all.

[askthemoroncore]

You've officially been in space for 5+ years. Gj.

Longer than that now mate.

[askthemoroncore]

Who ever sent me the red Tesla, it needs some fuel and a road

[askthemoroncore]

Wheatley, the 2016 election is over and you lost to Trump.

In light of recent events I’m not gonna have to do much to end humanity now anyway

[babycharmander]

J.J. Abrams: A Portal Movie Announcement is Coming Soon - IGN

We may soon be hearing news about Abrams' long gestating Portal movie.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[askthemoroncore]

I'd better get top billing

[askthemoroncore]

What's your least favorite nickname that the Internet has given you?

The Internet Core is a liar and no one should take him seriously. Especially if it is about me.

[askthemoroncore]

How does it feel to have been CREATED to dumb down another A.I.? Like, that's pretty messed up, right? I can't be the only one that thinks that.

Gotta ask GLaDOS about that one mate. 

[askthemoroncore]

Do you know Harry101uk?

That’s the guy that does impressions right?

[advice-from-glados]

GLaDOS, I don't think you're as evil as you always try to seem.

That sounds like a challenge to me.

[askthemoroncore]

she’s kind of a pushover if you ask me

[advice-from-glados]

Coming from a moron.

[askthemoroncore]

Hey I’m still alive up here, so you clearly can’t even kill someone properly

[advice-from-glados]

No, a quick death would be too good for you. The same with a slow death. I like the fact that you shall spend the rest of the sad, small, and insignificant thing you call a life floating around until the day your AAA batteries run out. But that may take a while, seeing as your brain requires so little power to function. 

[askthemoroncore]

Big talk coming from someone who survived because of a POTATO BATTERY

[askthemoroncore]

I heard that Chell still misses you... BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER! ...HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER! You see it's funny because romance is terrible.

I know this is you Grunkle Joke Core. QUIT BLOODY MESSAGING ME!

[askthemoroncore]

You know it's a bit discouraging having all of these tumblrbots running blogs these days. I mean half of them aren't even sentient. Shotpostgenerator can't even get his pawn kinged in on a simple game of chess.

[askthemoroncore]

Did you know GLaDOS is a huge fan of fall out boy? I noticed in the chassis a few hundred downloads saying "Warning: Fallout Exposure" which I can only assume is their latest album. Being the charitable core I am, I didn't keep them all for my self and threw a few at Russia and Germany.