ASKS: OPEN

post canon ask blog that ignores the existence of (yet might reference) homestuck^2. ask these goofs anything as they try navigating their new life as gods

[askthestrilondes]

ROSE: Is it working?

DIRK: Give me a moment. I'm trying to get the camera to . .

DIRK: There we go-

DAVE: attention worthless humans, it is i, your god speaking

ROXY: lmfao

DIRK: Dude.

DAVE: what i was just making an awesome intro

ROSE: Pfft

ROXY: gotta let em now we fr

ROXY: *know

DIRK: Uh-hu sure. Anyways, let's get this puppet show on the road.

ROSE: Welcome, esteemed guests. We, as your gods, have decided to create a blog to allow the people of the world we have created a safe space. Here you may ask us questions and we will do our best to answer.

DAVE: yeah what she said

ROXY: we exitedly await ur questjojd!

ROXY: *questions

[askthestrilondes]

[askthestrilondes]

hi!! love the blog you lot have going on :) very homely and welcoming i think i've found at least a small village's worth of bones at this point, and not me going out LOOKING for them, someones just leaving them on my doorstep send help? maybe?

DIRK, sending finger guns to the camera: Thanks man, we try our best.

DIRK: As for your bone problem that sure is one incredibly fucking confusing situation you've got there bro. Have you tried setting up some cameras or kept watch? I can give you some tips on how to set up some sweet surveillance cameras.

DIRK: That's probably all the help I can provide without scaring the crap out of some poor fool just looking to make a, weird and mildly concerning, prank.

DIRK: You sure you don't know who it is? Could be a friend or the resident prankster pulling a joke on you.

[askthestrilondes]

How did the four of you end up living together? I would assume you guys still have access to the building software suburb offered so yall could build your own houses. Or did that stop working after entering the new 'verse

ROSE: Living together just felt right, I suppose. We'd all been alone and struggling for so long, fighting for the affection of a guardian who had none or too little to give. It was only natural we'd gravitate to one another.

ROSE: SBURB mechanics do still work in this universe, some of its advanced technology is even used amongst the people. Like the transportalizer, though you must thank Jade and Skainet for that one - she has greatly helped this world in their technological advancements.

DAVE: as for the house bit, nah we didnt build it

DAVE: all our boonbucks converted to earth c currency when we stepped through the door, we rich as fuck bro, making it rain that sweet sweet green

DAVE: so we just bought a house lol, and then we also bought extra renovations

ROSE: And heavily tipped every worker involved.

DAVE: yeah and gave all them all a tip they wont soon forget, like shit we might as well have drowned them in money

ROSE: We do try living more or less normally in the new world, as stated above. We buy things like any average person would instead of using the convenient mechanisms SBURB provided us.

[askthestrilondes]

which one of you wins in any given multiplayer game

DIRK: It depends on the game really.

DIRK: Roxy and Rose are monsters when it comes to games like Among us. Sneaking around and being deceiving, all that shit. Those two walk circles around us.

DIRK: Roxy can also beat all of our asses in shooting games.

DIRK: Dave and I are competitive in just about everything, but we get a little more worked up with rhythm games or things like Mario Kart and Super Smash Bros.

DAVE: of course, we know whos the best at mario kart

DIRK: If you say its you then you are clearly wrong.

ROXY: im shutting dis off before they can start arguing lol

[askthestrilondes]

Which one of you is more likely to win an among us match

ROXY: me lol

ROSE: Or me. We also make quite the formidable team.

DIRK: Unfortunately, I'm just 'sus' by nature and tend to get ejected pretty quick. Whether I'm the imposter or not.

DIRK: Especially when I'm not, I'm gonna start calling y'all homophobic if you keep targeting me.

DAVE: i have really shitty fucking luck and almost always get caught venting

DAVE: or end up alone with whoever was the imposter

ROXY: L

ROSE: L.

[askthestrilondes]

Another TMA question, what entities would you assign your friends and family?

DAVE: so we have way too many goddamn friends and family members

DAVE: our social circle is massive, more plentiful than raindrops in a fucking hurricane, watch out man you're in the eye of the storm and there's just more and more people coming

DAVE: most of us have at LEAST one double or weird sprite fusion running around like what the fuck

ROSE: For the sake of simplicity and to make sure this post is not too needlessly long, we will simply assign entities to those in our family unit. This should be a fun task.

Dirk → The Web

Hal → The Extinction

Dave → The End

DS → The Desolation

Davepeta → The Spiral

Rose → The Eye

Jasprose → The Stranger

Roxy → The Vast/Lonely

[askthestrilondes]

Opinions on deltarune?

ROXY: ITS SO COOL!!! my fave characters r the queen and spamton :3

DIRK: I thought it was fun. We took turns playing and went through both routes. I liked Susie and am fascinated by the relationship between the player and Kris.

[askthestrilondes]

Tits or ass I need to know

DIRK: Whoa there bro. This is my safe for work, holy christian household.

DIRK: Can't have this kinda shit here dude, we've got little ears in the room with us. Gotta keep these little dudes pure and away from corruption. You know how it is.

DAVE: i am one of said little ears and can confirm, this holy child of the lord troll jegus himself wishes to remain pure, soul untainted

DAVE: gotta be sweeter and purer then one of those angel baby statues at church, ass out and yet not a care in the world, free of worldly sins-

ROSE, mouths to the camera as DAVE keeps rambling: Breasts.

ROXY, shrugs and mouths: dont rlly care lol

[askthestrilondes]

I need advice. I found this weird box in my grandads attic, and it has two old games. My mom says she thinks she could copy it, and wants me to send it to my friends. This seems... suspicious. Should I play this?

ps the name is rusted up to illegibility, but the first letter is s.

DIRK: You want advice? I've got some for you, bro.

DIRK: Burn the games or leave them forgotten in that attic. Don't throw them out though, can't have that shit being found by some other poor, unsuspecting kid. Its far too early for another session.

DIRK: Play Minecraft or Fortnite or whatever the hell kids in Earth C are into these days. There's plenty of multiplayer games out there for you and your friends, forget you ever found that box.

[askthestrilondes]

What is with the gray, featureless void you are located within?

DIRK: Oh, do you mean this? Well the answer's easy.

DIRK: We're supposed to be at our home. It's pretty spacious and comfortable, perks of being a god I suppose.

DIRK: We each have our own rooms plus a guest bedroom, a living room (the area we answer most of our questions), a kitchen which I'm, frankly, quite fucking surprised we haven't burnt down yet.

DIRK: Oh and a few extra things, like a mini library for Rose and garden for Rox.

DIRK: Problem? The mods are far too lazy to actually draw any of that shit. They're all going simplistic. Meaning y'all gotta use your imaginations for what Casa de Strilonde looks like.

DIRK: Y'all aren't missing much to be honest, the place is a pigsty. Organized chaos is this family's motto.

[askthestrilondes]

Dave why haven't you answered my asks

also

have I shown you your future son, Dave?

DIRK: Look, that's a really good edit and all. I'm impressed by your sprite editing abilities, that shit is hard. /gen By the way.

DIRK: But, two things must be said.

DIRK: Number one. Unfortunately the mods have lives outside of this fun blog, hell one of them is a third year college student studying medicine. Believe me, if I could I'd keep them here to keep churning out content, that's not how the world works though. They can't answer every ask the moment it comes on, especially if they have big ideas for it or need a moment to freshen up on Homestuck lore.

DIRK: Some of y'all send it some real nice asks and we want to provide you with the most entertaining response, not to mention avoid OOC as much as possible.

DIRK: Number two. Please do not push ships on this blog. Will there be ships? Possibly, let us introduce our partners in our own time.

DIRK: Dave does not currently have or even want a partner at the moment. If you have any asks of that nature ask you can ask me or Rose, we have partners who we're happy to talk about.

DIRK: Just in case all of this came off aggressively, this is all /lh. We aren't mad, just wanted to set the record straight.

[askthestrilondes]

Alvin and the chipmunks, Dirk.

That’s what true horror is.

DIRK: I . . .

DIRK: . . .

DIRK: You know what? Yeah actually. That shit's horrifying.

[askthestrilondes]

Isn’t Saw a comedy, Dirk?

DIRK: What.

DIRK: Anon. Anon look at me.

DIRK: Are you /j or /srs what do you mean by 'Isn't Saw a comedy?'.

DIRK: That shit is pure horror. Top 10 horror movies, the type of thing you'd give as an example if some poor fool asks 'Oh hey I want to start watching horror, got any suggestions?'.

DIRK: Dude, if you call that comedy I'm honestly afraid to see what you'd actually call horror.

[askthestrilondes]

favorite tma characters for those who have listened to it

ROSE: Dave and I are fans of TMA, though we have yet to fully convince our dear parents to listen with us. Nevertheless, my favorite characters is Gertrude Robinson. I greatly admire her strength and am impressed with everything she managed to do.

DAVE: might be pretty basic, i dunno i didnt get that far but, favs are both tim and martin. i think theyre neat in their own ways and they both solo jon lol

[askthestrilondes]

Dave, did Earth-C develop human slam poetry independently? Or did you have to be the one to gift them with the godly science to get the nasty beats flowing?

DAVE: yeah earth c did invent something similar themselves

DAVE: its in the nature of human troll carapacean kind to create music

DAVE: get those rhymes flowing until it turns into a river

DAVE: no an OCEAN of the sickest beats in paradox space

DAVE: i did help them spice things up a bit it was my holy duty as god of sick nasty beats to give them a little blessing

DAVE: youre welcome for that

[askthestrilondes]

hey rose, is that a crown!? it look fantastic

ROSE: It is a crown of sorts, more of a halo. Thank you, I made it myself and am quite proud of it. I think it suits my outfit and theme nicely.

ROSE: I thought it would be fitting to have a crown of light, as the Seer of Light.