I have ASPD, this blog is a combination vent/advocacy blog for that.
NCBs (non-cluster Bs) are okay to interact, but remember: this is not your space. This a safe space for cluster Bs, and ableists will be blocked on sight.
We stand with our cluster B siblings on this blog. NPDers, BPDers, and HPDers are all welcome here.
I’m learning. If I say something wrong, feel free to correct me, everything I say is based off personal experience.
Questions are welcome in the ask box, but I will delete things at my discretion.
If you must refer to me, I prefer neutral/masc terms. My pronouns are he/they/its, and for the purposes of this blog, I go by Cyrus.
I am not an expert on ASPD, just someone who has it. I do not claim to be a psychologist or any of that crap.
We are pro-self dx on this blog. No one knows your brain better than you.
Narcissistic abuse doesn’t exist, you’re thinking of emotional abuse.
“Fan mail” is the tag I use for asks. (Never worry about sending an ask btw, I thrive on attention. You’re doing me a favor.)
Trolls will be thrown off the overpass- they should be happy there.
Massive trigger warning for the whole blog: I use the slurs sociopath and psychopath (mostly in a reclaimed way) heavily, if those are triggering to you I suggest you filter the post content or leave. I also swear in nearly every post, but you’re on the internet, so 🤷
It's with a heavy but hopeful heart that I watch Palestinian families fundraiser on here, slowly accumulating the precious little money to go around that they need to survive. However, not everyone is so lucky. A lot of Palestinians that have not had that kind of luck, that did not get early verification, that did not get massive platforms behind them from large bloggers, have approached me in my inbox, asking me kindly to do what I can for them.
It kills me that I have so little to give myself, but I've seen this platform collectively raise enough to change someone's life. I've made a list of Palestinian fundraisers that are extremely low on funds, in the hope that drawing attention to people who have not been lucky at all can help turn that luck around.
I know most of us can't possibly give enough to get all of these families safe in one go. But please, reblog this list. Pick one or two fundraisers, give what you can, and then keep track of it. Slowly, collectively, we can make a difference in these people's lives.
Share and donate as much as you can.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/178EGDFKkHlh3y4TMVX82kqgITHsqtoMdNccI2f_94Os/edit?usp=sharing
righttttt so like here's the deal. me? doing good! doing a lot better than when I started this blog. joined a literature club, got into new fandoms, all that good stuff that healthy people do. this blog? takes energy. energy that I do not have at present.
when i started this blog, posting was venting. now, i dont really need the support of a constant void to scream into, and so it's kinda dried up. sad for ya'll guys. i'm having a great time tho
i want to leave my posts up- and who knows, maybe i'll need this blog again someday- so im not gonna deactivate or archive or whatever. you can still send asks- i still read them- but odds are they wont be posted, and the stuff i do have to say will probably end up as cryptic vents on my main.
it's been fun, this blog was a huge help, n i hope you guys got something out of it too. have a good one.
my queerness and my mental illness are inseparable.
I am agender and aroace. I barely have any emotions because of ASPD. Me not having romantic or sexual attraction or gender, it feels like just another thing that got thrown in the bin because of my disorder. And the narrative is that queer people are born this way, and that it's not a problem. I'm sure that's true for some people, but it's isolating to never see my experience reflected.
please read this if you don’t support the fucking genocide
there are palestinian kids who should be in school, getting ready for a new semester. they should be procrastinating their homework, texting their friends. they should get to go home when they feel unsafe or upset.
instead, the school year was suspended on november 6th. over 200 schools have been bombed. more than 7,870 children have been killed. kids do not have a safe place. anywhere. their homes are being destroyed and their schools are being destroyed and the places they used to hang out at and eat at and shop at and pray at and mourn at and live at are actively being destroyed
people of palestine, of all ages, should be living their lives. they should be having normal experiences. they should be going to the movies or redecorating their rooms or celebrating birthdays or scrolling their phones for no reason. but they’re not. they’re not allowed to have the comfort of mindless human joy without constant threat and fear and bloodshed, and it is the fault of israel, the united states, and other fucked corrupt governments.
there have been close to 20,000 palestinian deaths, almost 2.2 million people displaced, and an estimated half of those people face starvation.
we need to fucking do something. the fact that the US still refuses to support a ceasefire is disgusting and evil. the claim that all anti-israeli statements are based in antisemitism is hurting both the people of palestine and jewish people worldwide.
here’s some things you can do:
-donate if you can or ask someone you know to donate
-sign a petition to demand a ceasefire
-fill out a form to email your representative. then do it again. then do it again. then do it again.
-boycott and avoid all companies on this list that you can (especially now that the holidays are rolling around: buy from independent stores, non-big name brands)
-spam text your friends and family with this post and these links
-reblog to spread awareness, interact with other posts that give instructions for direct action, follow palestinian voices
-instead of feeling guilt or denying yourself personal happiness, do all you can to make a difference. it doesn’t matter if you don’t have money to donate or if you’re a minor. you can always contact representatives or sign petitions
"Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim"
It is so much easier to turn a blind eye on human suffering far away from you, it is so much easier to stay silent.
When 2 million humans are suffering nonstop from an oppressive state, it is your duty as a human to care. When it's been happening nonstop for 75 years. Don't fail Palestinians, not when they cant communicate. Be their voice, be a part of the solution not the problem, boycott, speak up, don't let the media trick you into believing it wont work, it will. If it doesn't affect you, they're doing it using your tax money, they're doing it in the money you give, they are killing children. Innocent kids dying and you can stop it. SPEAK UP!
Instagram: Watch video at Source (A song plays in the bg, Bisan in text explains the song and that a statue of Anat was found in the Southern part of Gaza Strip)
Instagram: Watch video at Source (Bisan talks about the long walk to go to the bathroom, that her area has no water and bathrooms, and her feelings of disappointment in the world)
Instagram: Source
Instagram: Source
Instagram: Source
Instagram: Source
Twitter: Source
Twitter: Source
Twitter: Watch video at Source (Talks about the various forms of torture they faced)
I suppose we should start with why this strike is happening in the first place.
Here's a rundown of the historical background behind the Global Strike for Palestine.
(note: this is long but very oversimplified, please research the details for yourself! feel free to correct me)
By the way, the details before 1947 aren't relevant to this thread, please read the writeup by Decolonize Palestine about it!
In 1947, the UN split "Mandatory" Palestine into two states along ethnic lines - one controlled by Arab people and one controlled by Jewish people. The choice was controversial, since the border was forced upon Arabs in Palestine.
It brought in a political idea called Zionism. It's the belief that the home of Jewish people is Palestine - not IN Palestine, it IS Palestine. Problem is that Jews and Arabs were already living there together. Zionists believed that they were entitled to it, and so kicked Arab people out. In 1948, Zionists kicked 750k people out of their homes and killed thousands in an event called the "Nakba". They weren't allowed to come back to Palestine.
This process created "Israel", which slowly controlled more of Palestine over several decades, with no plans of stopping. They controlled Palestinian people's food and water, information, travel, job opportunities, etc.
This ideology of Zionism was fed into the US too. Every President since the 40s has recognized Israel, and because of geopolitical interest, has supported it as a key player in the Middle East and North Africa (MENA). The US gave it weapons and money, and they became besties.
Palestinians tried to resist their homes being stolen again multiple times, with protests ranging from diplomatic to very violent. They tried it all. Military and political organizations (like Hamas) formed to govern Palestine and fight (or make peace, if possible) with Israel. They failed every time, due to the weapons and intel Israel gets from the US, and the trust that it bargained from the rest of the world. All while Palestine had to make do living in an "open-air prison" inside their own country, invaded by Israel.
A lot of unhappiness with Israel and ineffective attacks culminated on October 7, 2023, when Hamas attacked a temporarily defenseless border and killed 1139 Israelis and keeping over 200 Israelis and foreigners hostage. Israel was VERY quick to respond.
Two disclaimers:
Israel already knew about the attack months ahead and let it happen.
What follows is far worse.
Starting October 7, Israel launched a full invasion of Gaza (which Hamas governs) as "revenge" for the hostages and deaths. But in reality, this was just their excuse to invade what they left over of Palestine to build more colonies and finish what they started. In the following 3 months, Israel would bomb Gaza relentlessly. It would cut off power, fire at phone towers, turn off the Internet, prevent anyone from making or bringing in food, wound or kill innocent people, bomb schools and hospitals, and far far more.
Israel also pretended to care about the Israeli hostages - however, when asked at the UN if they'll stop bombing Gaza in exchange for the hostages, Israel and the US said no. (Yes, the US said that. The US is also funding this, with YOUR taxpayer money)
The Israeli Defense Forces (pejoratively "Israeli Offense Forces") originally raised a campaign to convince the world what it was doing was fair and just, in the name of revenge. Countless protests across the world have shown them that most of civilization doesn't buy it. They HAVE, however, realized that those in power don't really give a shit and will be happy to cover them in any way, and thus have been bragging about their attacks in very sick and twisted ways through viral videos and propaganda. The United States is mostly the one taking the blame, since it's Israel's bestie and biggest donor. Its biggest businesses are also Israel's biggest profits (I will talk about this another day). Meanwhile Palestinians have had to prove to the world through tragic footage and live accounts of the genocide, that doesn't get mainstream media coverage. Most of the accurate coverage is from Al Jazeera, whose reporters and their families are getting killed in action.
As I'm writing this, 25,000+ people have been killed by Israeli strikes. 64,000+ are wounded. Most of them children.
Most of the population has gotten sick from unhealthy conditions and white phosphorus gas (illegal, no one is supposed to own that).
There are no hospitals left in Gaza because Israel bombed all of them one-by-one, to ensure Palestinians in Gaza can't get medical help and die as soon as possible. All schools and universities were bombed to dust.
Israel has also expanded their war on Gaza to other places, like the other part of Palestine (West Bank), as well as Yemen, Lebanon and Egypt who had nothing to do with it aside from opposing Israel's attacks. They started fighting them too.
And that brings us to today, January 21st, 2024.
One of the most prominent figures in this tragedy, a filmmaker from Palestine named Bisan Owda, who has led us through her reporting of the genocide, called upon the world to strike. Not just for one day, but an entire week. The intent is to halt businesses from funding Israel, divert the conversation to Palestine, and grab the attention of those with the power to stop this; instill fear in them so that they see the negative consequences of funding a war.
That's why this strike matters. That is why it is happening, and why I changed the entire gimmick for it. Because while all of this is due to some geopolitical and racist bullshit, to care for Palestine here is to care for humans. So many humans who are suffering for no reason.
Now that you are armed with this knowledge (hopefully you read this far), I hope you do your best with it and understand the power. I will provide you with more resources and information in the coming days.
I do not normally reblog things and I do not normally post about non-ASPD related stuff. But this is important.
People in Palestine are being genocided. Gaza is being bombed. Thousands are being displaced and killed and starving. I am begging you all to participate in the strike however you can. Donate to relief funds. Spread awareness.
Here you can give internet to someone in Gaza, which is critical for communication.
Please help deliver support to Palestinian families; all you have to do is to click once a day for free, every day!
if you do not have money, you can click here once a day to donate.
Join me in helping save lives by delivering food to families in need. Make a difference today by donating to the World Food Program USA.
There is a famine in Gaza right now. Many people are in danger of starving. You can donate food here.
Feel free to reblog with other charities you recommend.
To people who support Israel- you are not welcome here. Get off this blog. You are reprehensible and I hope you can feel the blood being spilled.
I have a question! This is something I actually wonder about it’s not a gotcha or anything
A lot of people really don’t like calling self-absorbed ppl who don’t have npds “narcissistic”. Why is that? “Antisocial” is an adjective I think is still pc to use. So are “anxious” and “obsessive”. “Narcissistic” as a term existed loooong before npd, so why does npd existing mean it’s not pc to use the term anymore?
(This question is not about the term “narcissistic abuse”; I can see the issue in that. *Just* using the word “narcissistic” to describe people who don’t have the personality disorder.)
You actually made me think about this, I hadn't really considered it before. Thanks for that.
(also, about antisocial: thats a word that really only applies to people with ASPD. It's gotten mixed up with asocial, which is essentially a way to describe introverts, but they are separate terms. Understandable confusion, though.)
(And as always, I'm only one voice on the topic.)
I think it comes down to a few things, imo: exclusivity and visibility.
Exclusivity: the word 'anxious' or 'obsessive' doesn't just apply to people with mental disorders. My aunt who spends the vast majority of her time reading things for her book club could be accurately called obsessive, and she's the most neurotypical person on the block. Narcissism, you're right, might have just been a stand in for self centred in the past, but today its almost exclusively used to refer to people who (are perceived to) have NPD. This ties into my next point,
Visibility: While anxiety and ODC are getting more understanding, and people are learning more about them (Note: I'm not saying that they don't have struggles with public perception, just that they're very well understood relative to NPD) NPD seems to be more villanized lately. It's gotten more attention, but still seems to be considered synonymous with abuser. So because NPD is still considered 'evil', no one bothers distinguishing between the disorder and the word. NPD and narcissism are used interchangeably, so when you refer to someone selfish as narcissistic, you're conflating that person and people with the personality disorder.
honestly, I don’t trust people who say stuff like “kill abusers! They don’t deserve life!”
I’m not going to get into my issues with the phrase itself because that’s a post I’ve already made, but the people who say that stuff, in my experience, are the types who care more about fake kids than actual survivors, throw a fit the moment you show an ugly trauma response, and overall just… don’t care. They just say it to be Progressive and Woke (tm) and do nothing to actually help abuse survivors.
We’re not saying you should want us to have rights because we think we’re the same as you. We’re saying that to the people who want to kill us, there is no difference between how “good” and “bad” freaks bleed.
