nah. to all of it

I can't make heads or tails of any of this

[bewbin]

Truly such a beautiful day for their majesties the new king and queen may there rule be long and prospero- BLIMEY! ITS PRINCESS DIANA AND SHES GOT A STEEL CHAIR

[videogomez]

[videogomez]

[shakertwelve]

why are drugs even illegal anymore. who cares

[ts-lizziesiddall]

honestly yeah ok

[jeekoftheweek]

[seaslux]

what the FUCK i was just on a wikipedia binge and i learned about the jellyfish life cycle and its fuckin WILD gang

[seaslux]

look at this shit. they just turn into jellyfish trees

[wumblr]

some species (such as turritopsis dohrni) skip over the “egg” phases and just revert their own bodies from medusa directly back to polyp, making them functionally immortal lol

[asteriskshrugasterisk]

[crystalqueer]

My sister said the birds in her town were acting weird and I was like uh-huh whatever and then she sent pictures and

Now I’m terrified.

[asteriskshrugasterisk]

[feministism]

[samsoonite]

"Faggot"

[ronaldalan]

THIS

[abc-lgbt]

Reblog every time

[ra-moon]

HOLY SHIT

[stushiroll-deactivated20200406]

[just-shower-thoughts]

Instead of paying $1 for a bookmark, you could just use the dollar as a bookmark.

[iamoutofideas]

you could just pee anyehere

[dankmemeuniversity]

[heiligetod]

The Babushkas of Chernobyl (2015)

[doortoanotherdoortoanotherdoor]

[fuck-customers]

A few years back, I was a waitress at a breakfast diner. On the menus there are pictures of omelettes. The omelettes pictured are yellow.

It’s 11 at night, I get the last table before closing, and it’s a girl my age. She asks for tea and an egg white omelette. So I bring over her egg white omelette, and she starts screaming. Why? Because it’s not yellow like in the picture on the menu, it’s white, so something must be wrong. I explained that the yolk is what makes omelettes yellow, and she didn’t want egg yolks. She’s still mad, and yells again. And then realizes she could eat while she’s yelling, so she does, and I get to watch her chew with her mouth open while she rants about eggs. I’m exhausted and dying inside. She finally stops. I ask if she wants a refill of tea, and she says yes. She’s quiet for the rest of her meal, for which I am very grateful.

After she paid and left, I collected her receipt. On it, she wrote in all caps “I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW EGGS WORK BUT IT WAS YUMMY.” She left a $20 bill on the table as a tip. She also left some pills in a bag that my manager sent to the police, which were identified as some sort of amphetamine. 

Don’t do drugs kids, you’ll forget how eggs work.

[yiffmaster]

your boss can’t garnish your tips like that

[theocseason4]

[joshpeck]

[neutralbacteria]

[the-memedaddy]

me irl