• Paine. Queer, 30, any pronouns. I follow back from dr-paine; and you'll never guess what my AO3 username is.
• Writing for 20+ years in some capacity
• Genre of choice is Fantasy. (High, low, slice of life or ungodly horror, mixed with sci-fi or the most classic Medieval sword and sorcery bullshit, I just need a touch, even if only implied, of magic.) I don't delve much into NSFW but it may come up; in any case: please only follow if you're 18+, and treat this blog with the mindset of 'creator chose not to use archive warnings'.
• I crave interaction, especially via tag/ask games - seriously. I reblog a lot of them. Do Not Hesitate. (And I always try to send an ask if you reblog any from me!)
• Hobbyist writer - I'm not aiming to be published, but I do want to improve my skills and eventually like... 'win a NaNo' in the sense of writing a complete, longform story one of these days. But also having fun is a priority, and ADHD + work is a cruel mistress, so I'll jump between WIPs on a whim, or just. Drop shit for months on end lol.
Vague List of Active Projects
While I have a ton of ideas, these are the ones that actually have like... any sort of substance to them, whether it's actual words or just a solid outline + desire to work on it. Each will eventually get a dedicated links/resource post, but for now, here's the basics!
Relentless As The Tide
(Mass Effect fics (roughly) following canon events/characters)
Adrian Shepard has been primed for heroism her entire life. Her first chance ended in a tragedy, one neither she nor the Alliance has ever properly owned up to. Saren's betrayal and the beacon's vision offer her the chance to atone for her failure at Akuze, and she'll do everything in her power to do so - even (and especially) if it kills her in the process.
Or so she believes - but uncovering the truth means looking for allies, and the more she gathers, the harder it becomes to believe that her death should - or can - be the end; and that perhaps heroism is just a means of distraction from confronting her own demons.
Unnamed Pokemon Project
(Loose follow through/retelling of Pokemon: Soul Silver)
Giovanni Rossi, former leader of the Viridian City pokemon gym, has confessed to heading the infamous Rocket organization, whose poaching and illegal trade has devestated the Kanto ecosystem for the past twenty years. However, he claims it was all for a good cause - just prior to founding Rocket, Giovanni had been part of a team trying to create artificial pokemon... and their most viable subject escaped. Rocket existed for the sake of tracking down and eventually overpowering this creature, but now... well, he wishes those in the Kanto and Johto regions the best of luck.
Following a break in at the New Bark Town lab, an assistant to Professor Elm - a reclusive young man named Linden - tracks down the suspect, only to find it's none other than Silver Rossi, Giovanni's own son. The boy claims he wants to take down the creature his father helped create and clear his own name from the scandal... and Linden has reasons of his own that make him want to see how things play out, even if it means he must shadow Silver's journey by embarking on one of his own.
Unnamed OC Project
(Original fantasy work)
In a world of faded magic, Elora Ryba cares little for talk of soon-to-come saviors or the sightings of dragons. No, she has other things on her mind - return to the town she was forced to leave over ten years ago, and steal its most precious treasure. And, ideally, marry her, as Elora promised that night she was forced to flee.
Which is why Elora's spent the past month searching for a priest corrupt enough to join a pirate's crew, but not corrupt (or worse, moral) enough to turn her in, and she thinks she's finally found one.
I feel like I need one more character to round out this little OC set lol
Like, Hekka & Ardent have been around forever as a duo who keep some crappy little bar on the Citadel going, and that (still technically in progress!) little fic idea has now brought about Crush the krogan, who's in the group & apprenticing in the tattoo shop next door...
It just feels like there's someone missing and I can't figure out who 😂
sometimes instead of “why can’t they just be friends” i think it should be “why can’t they also be friends” because sometimes shipping feels much too much like forcing two pretty characters to kiss and be intimate without actually being interested in the dynamic the two people have. what about hanging out together. what about why they like being in each others company. what do they argue about. how do they patch things up. what do they laugh about.
i NEED people to realise foreshadowing is. in fact. a literary device. and not a Bad Thing. the audience picking up on your hints is a Good Thing. because. it makes the story and it’s conclusion make sense. and some people will not see those but enjoy seeing them on a second read through. red herrings are one thing but if your novel consists of nothing but red herrings it’s not a coherent story it’s just a collection of paragraphs that don’t actually plausibly link to one another. you're not fighting with the audience you don’t look clever you look like you don’t know how basic fiction works. be vulnerable for once in your goddamn life and don't treat writing like a game to be won where the audience losing is a good thing.
Getting to the end of a story and going "THE CLUES WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME!" is always joyous for me whether or not I picked up on the clues leading up
If I saw the clues and caught the hints then yes! I am clever and me and the author/creator/artist etc were in on it together the whole time!
If I didn't notice the clues or got fooled but can clearly see them in hindsight then "Ha! You won this time storyteller! I am delighted by this game we play!' and then I enjoy putting the pieces together afterwards and enjoying how clever it was. I feel like the creator respects me as an audience
If there is a "twist" that comes with 0 clues or foreshadowing at all I'm annoyed. I'm pissed off. I feel like I'm being condescended to and patronised. It's not clever or interesting and makes me annoyed I ended up caring about characters and plot points that ended up meaningless.
Because it's not that these stories don't have foreshadowing or plot clues. They just abandon it for a "surprising twist"
A story that pays off the clues is letting me into the fun and makes a participant in the story
A story that just gives me a "shock" but no pay off is telling me not to engage or get attached or care. So why would I watch?
Random plot twists that don't connect to anything in the story are not clever. If we don't see it coming because the writer didn't provide any clues, they aren't clever and it's totally unsatisfying (and I will NEVER read this writer again). These clues need not be lit up in neon with a parade of elephants and showgirls. But they need to be present
I'm a writer and am rarely surprised. Often, if I am surprised it's because the writer was a dumbass and included a "twist" that makes no sense (and therefore isn't really a twist, it's just random bullshit). If a writer genuinely surprises me, without being an absolute dumbass, I am FUCKING DELIGHTED! I will tell everyone I know to read the book/see the movie/watch the show.
Foreshadowing is the reward for paying attention. It's the story letting you in on the secret like a co-conspirator because you're the clever little audience member who has been picking up on the clues the writer has been setting up.
It even makes watching/reading again more worthwhile because if you didn't notice the foreshadowing the first time you have the joy of being able to notice the things you missed!
So I write novels, comics, and GM an actual play show -- and my policy has always been this: with a good twist, about 20% of the audience should have figured it out ahead of time, and the other 80% should be slapping their foreheads going "God damn it, why didn't I see this coming?"
The people who figure it out ahead of time feel rewarded for paying attention, and the rest don't feel cheated by the reveal. The people who didn't see it coming should want to go back to find the clues they missed.
Like if I see a comment online about something I wrote where someone goes "Wait... I think [THEORIZES A TWIST THAT ISN'T COMING FOR A YEAR OR SO IN THE NARRATIVE]" I get so giddy.
YOU SAW IT. YOU SAW WHAT I'M DOING. YOU AND ME ARE FRIENDS NOW EVEN THOUGH I'LL NEVER TELL YOU THAT YOU WERE RIGHT. I WOULD START SENDING YOU HOLIDAY CARDS IF THAT WASN'T A WEIRD THING TO DO TO A STRANGER.
i think theres something thats unfortunate about some trends in fantasy books the last couple decades wherein people lose the story in the worldbuilding. the worldbuilding is generally there to support the story. u have to trust your readers to not need an explicitly detailed explanation of every aspect of how exactly things work... it doesnt have to have a Dungeon Manual. obviously it should hold up under scrutiny and not be, like, completely nonsensical in its implications in a way that contradicts things youve written into the plot and stuff. but it doesnt need to like. it doesnt have to be a situation where you have to Show Your Work all the time
obviously not every story is a fairy tale or wants to have fairy tale vibes, but i always think like. we dont know the Magic System of... jack and the beanstalk. we dont know Why a giant beanstalk leads to someones great big sky house or why the goose lays golden eggs like dont worry about it. unimportant
and while i think a lot of stories benefit from more worldbuilding than others, and some definitely really do A Ton Of Worldbuilding well (and like, some people WANT dungeon manuals!) i do think writers starting out often feel a pressure to approach writing a story by figuring out How And Why The Setting Works This Way, and that its good to be able to talk about like. other. priorities and approaches. just bc something is SFF doesnt mean it has to be all world explanation
“Stop thinking about saving your fragile face. Tell us your particularized world. Make up a story. Narrative is radical, creating us at the very moment it is being created. We will not blame you if your reach exceeds your grasp. We will not blame you if your words go down in flames and nothing is left but the raw-scald. We will not blame you if, with the reticence of a surgeon’s hands, your words suture only the red places where blood might flow. We will not blame you because we know you can never do it properly: once and for all. Passion is never enough. Talent is never enough. Skill is never enough. But try. For our sake and yours. So. Forget your name in the street; tell us what the world has been to you in the dark places and in the light. Don’t tell us what to believe, what to fear. Show us belief’s wide skirt and the stitch that unravels fear’s caul. You, so blessed with occasional blindness, can speak the language that tells us what only language can: how to see without pictures. We tell ourselves stories in order to live.”
— Toni Morrison, The Nobel Lecture In Literature, 1993
my toxic fandom trait is that when characters have exes i like to pretend they did in fact have genuine feelings for those people, because otherwise i have to discard most of their lives as being but a trial run until i decided who to ship them with.
Religion in fantasy worlds: Everyone believes the exact same things about Green Nature Goddess and has official rituals for her that are the same everywhere
Religion irl: Technically it’s heresy for me to worship this skeleton but my spiritual advisor said that it’s legit so I’m gonna keep giving it offerings of yogurt
Religion in fantasy worlds: These are the rules. The rules are law. Nobody can break the rules.
Religion irl: Okay you say that there are “rules” but how exactly are we defining “rules” here? Like is a suggestion a rule? How are we defining suggestion? No come back. Listen. Are we going by nuance in the original language or are translations fine or-
High control religions/cults recruiting in fantasy worlds: Join us! For we shall all eat the moon! This is a legitimate position to have!
High control religions/cults recruiting irl: We have free snacks. That shirt looks sooo cute on you btw. What, you heard that we wanna eat the moon? The media is always telling lies about us you know. We may have some unorthodox opinions about the moon but, tell you what. Come get some snacks, make some new friends, maybe chat about the moon a bit. See what you think. We’ve got pizza.
That last one is a personal pet peeve of mine. It's not just a stupidity of fantasy religions, but also a stupid misconception of actual religions. There are plenty of religions that actively practice animal sacrifice today, and a ton of people (even pagans) who are scandalized by it. Like to the point that sometimes one of the first things pagans clarify when explaining their religion to outsiders is that they do not practice animal sacrifice, as if animal sacrifice is intrinsically unethical. Which is both religious bigotry and extremely racist.
Animals intended for sacrifice are better treated than factory farmed animals. Often better treated than secular sustainably farmed animals.
In almost all cases, a sacrificed animal is one that was going to be slaughtered for food anyway, and the ritualized slaughter is a way to ensure that the slaughtering is done correctly (for humane treatment and food safety), as well as a way to invite the divine to join the party.
Animal sacrifice is substantially more ethical and sustainable than factory farming. I don't currently raise animals for food (though it's often been on the table for me) but if I did, I would ritualize the act of slaughter. As a Hellene and a priestess of Hekate there is appeal to the idea of raising black goats for food and sacrificing them in her name.
Does anyone out there have a novel rec that's essentially like... 'the love was there, and it was good, but it just wasn't meant to last'? Not too picky on genre (aside from it inherently is leaning romantic), but would prefer shorter standalones.
Cannot say how much I just rotate this idea in my head ok -
And again the just. The contrasts between 1 and 2; pre-1 Adrian was, despite it all, careful to keep everything where it would still be covered - shoulder & back pieces, probably some around the torso, and definitely a couple rough self-done bits on her thighs. The only 'public' one was the thresher maw & even that one stayed covered most of the time. The thought process of so deeply believing you shouldn't be alive, but still you persist, subjecting yourself to pain part as punishment and part to keep from doing something worse. That maybe it's another way of being useful - a living canvas for those whose art can only be expressed that way, you know? Being aware enough to remain 'professional', but maybe somewhere, hoping one day you will be okay enough to show even one person, to share those memories and meanings, and maybe there is something in turning pain into something at least a little beautiful.
And then one day you do reach that state; you're wanting to live and you've found someone you can trust, someone you know would be able to hear those stories without flinching, who might understand some of that instinct that made you permanently etch that hurt into your skin -
And there's nothing left. You've been reborn, literally and metaphorically, and there's not even a speck of ash left to show of what you used to be.
what if your doppelganger loved being you more than you ever loved being yourself. they're better at being you and everyone loves them and it feels almost selfish to want your life back. i want clone horror but the horror is that the thing trying to replace you is also the person you always wanted to be.
