The N. Todd Times (writer + veterinarian)

Christ is #1, then I am a writer, blogger, Aspie, veterinarian all in one

[authornaimahtodd]

Never give up. If no one else does, I believe in you. 🧩💚

[autisticadvocacy]

“Much of the progress we have made as a nation achieving positive change for historically marginalized people and communities has been led by Black Americans with disabilities." 

[writingdotcoffee]

“The first step - especially for young people with energy and drive and talent, but not money - the first step to controlling your world is to control your culture. To model and demonstrate the kind of world you demand to live in. To write the books. Make the music. Shoot the films. Paint the art.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

[authornaimahtodd]

Had to tell myself this yesterday and today and probably tomorrow and probably all this week. It has been a LONG week fraught with communication issues. And a clinic emergency yesterday---aye!----my mentor had to come bail me out. And in the meantime, I got smart with a client who did not understand the urgency of the situation and decided to be completely rude even after I tried to explain. I even threw in the whole "I understand your frustration..." bit we went over 😪

Anyway, I am now trying to pick up the ravaged pieces of the disappointment I am sure I caused this week. I cannot even figure out where to begin, let alone face my mentor right now. But I am determined to keep trying. I was having such a good week last week, but the title for this week is definitely hashtag Aspie probs. Sometimes that is good...and sometimes, like this week, it has been pretty difficult. And yes, yes I am TOTALLY avoiding my mentor at all costs for now. Don't judge. 😅😅

And here's to anyone else who needs to hear this💜

[authornaimahtodd]

Shutdown: autistic retreat from the world due to feelings of guilt and inadequacy, or other overwhelming triggers. It is a way of dealing with external stressors.

Today was a hard day in the clinic, and a shut down was the response. I am still able to function but I lose a lot of the social skills I have worked so hard to build. Nevertheless, there are times I hope for these moments of reprieve. My focus and drive remain in tact, but I am just able to tune out some of the overwhelming B.S. socialization causes.

Anyway, here's to better days.

[authornaimahtodd]

There is nothing like these mornings just spent on the couch with my service dog watching Clannad, eating teddy grams😅 and finding inspiration.

[authornaimahtodd]

So glad to have found this guy a home. It was love at first sight. Tulok, now Walker, I wish you well, my deaf handsome boy. After our short time together, I will be enjoying my sleep tonight. 

P. S. 

I originally named him Tulok, Inuit for warrior, because I wanted a name related to the arctic; but his new family decided to call him Walker after the white walkers on Game of Thrones because they have pale eyes and are deaf. I thought it was a clever reference, how about you?

[authornaimahtodd]

So glad to have found this guy a home. It was love at first sight. Tulok, now Walker, I wish you well, my deaf handsome boy. After our short time together, I will be enjoying my sleep tonight. 

P. S. 

I originally named him Tulok, which is Inuit for warrior, because I wanted a name related to the arctic. But his new family decided to call him Walker after the white walkers on Game of Thrones because they have pale eyes and are deaf. I thought it was a clever reference. What about you?

[chattingwiththelightkeeper]

[authornaimahtodd]

I go for original😉

[writingdotcoffee]

“Three hours of writing require twenty hours of preparation. Luckily I have learned to dream about the work, which saves me some working time.”

— John Steinbeck

[authornaimahtodd]

Totally me🙃

[inspiring-prompts]

"It's hard to believe he's out there; that he looks up at the same sun that shines on me."

[authornaimahtodd]

As an Aspie, sometimes I don't even realize my triggers; my brain will just shut down and sometimes meltdown without me knowing why. I have learned the feeling of overstimulation that happens before a meltdown. Such an episode happened at work once, but from it, I gained an amazing and compassionate mentor, whom I love dearly.

Writing is a way for me to work through emotions and develop an understanding of socialization.

[authornaimahtodd]

💜💜

[authornaimahtodd]

Them: What is your favorite literary device?

Me: alliteration🤤🤤

I can't help it. Patterns just speak to me!

[authornaimahtodd]

Sending much love to everyone on this lovely Valentine's Day featuring one of my favorite photo shoots.

[authornaimahtodd]

So Valentine's Day is tomorrow...and yes, it is still my favorite "holiday," even though my first marriage lasted less than a yr (thank you in part to Aspie sensory issues and in part to due to the good ole' irreconcilable differences). So this yr, it would be expected of me to be all sad and hateful...but I'm not. The lovely thing about my experience with Asperger's is I don't get attached or caught up on emotions like others. I recover pretty quickly with the power of logic. Honestly, I just tell myself the truth "The more time spent hurting is less time spent healing, and nothing is more lovely than a woman who can pull up her big girl boots and march on through despair like the most celebrated warrior on the battle field." A quick recovery isn't the secret to full recovery, though. Truth is, I keep my cards close to my chest because business is business and b.s. is just that😘 you give people an inch and they'll walk the mile with gossip and drama.

Besides, writing is healing, and within all those deep and despairing moments, there are gothic romance sequels just waiting to be discovered☺

PS and the cute puppy or two waiting to be cuddled in the clinic🐶😘

[authornaimahtodd]

My work space today as I do some editing. Just hanging out in Daddy's garage serenaded by the sound of my great nephew playing a beat on the concrete. I spent a lot of time as a kid in this same place, so it's nostalgic. Family inspires my writing so much. Without the support and drive my family instilled in me, I wouldn't be the person I am today.