Twisted Mind And All That

🌌Jakob🎑Gay🌈25 (quarter of a century already!)🌑 🌉Mostly reblog whatever🌃 🌄Enjoy!🌅

[gutsygills]

mold pisses me off so much

oh you have to eat your produce the moment it leaves the store or the fuckin Hungering Dust will get it. and. poison your food

[tobiasdrake]

I ran into this post years ago and to be honest, it has completely reoriented the way I engage with food.

Like. I’ve always sorta understood that things grow moldy or stale or sour or such if left out, but I never really internalized it in a meaningful way.

But now I’m just like.

Yeah. The hungering dust. There exists omnivorous dust in the air that will eat my food if I don’t.

Those bagels have been sitting there for a week. Are we going to eat them soon or are we leaving them for the hungering dust?

Pizza’s been sitting out on the counter for an hour. Everyone’s enjoying the pizza, but if we don’t want “everyone” to include the hungering dust then we should probably put it away soon.

That’s just. That’s how food works to me now. There exists an invisible predator in the air that hungers for your yummies, and it will not hesitate to eat your food if you don’t make the effort to protect and preserve it. And eat what can’t be preserved before the dust can.

Life-changing.

[the-missing-number]

food doesn’t actually “go bad”, it just gets eaten by something else first

[the-haiku-bot]

food doesn’t actually

“go bad”, it just gets eaten

by something else first

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[rimonoroni2]

i’m always thinking about that news story where a three year old boy who wandered away from his house and ended up in the middle of the woods was found by this local great pyrenees farm dog who herded the kid back to his unrelated owners house. and the guy was like. whose kid is this

[rimonoroni2]

that dog must have been like. hmm. this isn’t a goat. some human must have left their puppy behind by accident. i have to bring this to management. surely my owner will be able to sort out whatever has occurred. that kid was like i’m all alone and scared and omg a big fluffy puppy is here to help. and that fucking farmer looking at his dog like. who’s toddler did you steal???

[humanpersonface]

I think it is very important that everyone see the good boy in question. His name is Buford.

[southernoir]

If you can’t appreciate a dog named Buford, you have something wrong with you.

[micro-usb-deactivated20230625]

[spaghettioverdose-deactivated20]

As a trans woman I can confirm that they indeed found an ancient forest inside a 630ft deep sinkhole in China

[gayweeddaddy69]

cis people can reblog this but keep it on subject, please

[senshibignaturals]

Happy pride month everyone always remember that the sinkhole has an ecosystem large enough to house not only insects but likely several species of small birds or mammals

[beemovieerotica]

one cool thing about having an autistic dad whose special interest is underwater spearfishing is that when he catches fish he'll just call up a nearby chinese restaurant like "hi. i caught a fish. can you cook it and i'll bring my family by?" and they're like "yeah sure come on over white boy" and the fish is delicious.

[beemovieerotica]

it's worth adding that my mom is chinese and she always gets embarrassed by this. like she doesn't want to come to the restaurant with us. she doesn't want to be seen with the white man she caught plus the fish that her white man caught. everyone who works at the restaurant thinks my dad is awesome and compliments him + her for choosing him and we all find this very fun except for her.

[mymidwestheart]

Well, that made me happy. 😌🎠❄️

[rainbowbarnacle]

[alexaloraetheris]

Didn't realize it was a barn at first so I thought by Belgians she meant. People.

[liache]

i love that we and cats share pareidolia (seeing patterns where they dont exist), but instead of seeing faces in everyday objects like us, they see snakes

that computer cord? snake. string? small snake. cucumber? short fat straight snake

[yiffmaster]

snake pareidolia is one of the strongest things in human minds too! people report freezing mid-stride before being consciously aware of a snake in front of them, and the same happens with coiled rope, etc. in humans and other primates. it’s even been proposed that the need to detect snakes was a factor in the development of primates’ insanely good color eyesight

[ehlbee]

It’s because snakes are wonderful and we must stop and admire them at any cost

[cloudabserk]

[truetgirl]

Car Trunk vs Car Boot: A clear win for US English, trunk was already a thing in which you stored items, frequently for transport.

Crisps vs Chips: I gotta admit, the Brits have this one. They're thin slices of potato that have been made crispy. No chipping of any materials involved.

Car Park vs Parking Lot: Equally matched. What's a car park? A place to park cars. What's a parking lot? An otherwise empty lot where you can park.

Elevator vs Lift: Both equally fail to address that the damn thing also goes down.

[senatortedcruz]

I hate Elon musk so fucking much

[senatortedcruz]

Exactly!!!!!

[maryfitzroy]

as joyce carol oates once said, “the poorest persons on twitter may have access to more beauty & meaning in life than the ‘most wealthy person in the world.’”

[shashanotsasha]

Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter (2001, dir. Lee Demarbre)

[the-haiku-bot]

Jesus Christ Vampire

Hunter (2001,

dir. Lee Demarbre)

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[cricketcat9]

This is how it's done in Eastern Europe. Very many years ago I've seen an old lady in my grandparents' village doing it with a very similar tool and beeswax. You need a REALLY good eye-hand coordination...and ability not to mess your design with your own fingers (which I definitely don't possess).

[boccher]

i think every british journalist should just be gunned down

[maidthings]

On the small soggy wet archipelago that makes up the modern day united kingdom, sunny days are a rare phenomenon. As such, the peoples of england cherish each and every one, even going so far as to write songs about them in their local music. With sunlight in such high demand, to block it deliberately is nigh unthinkable, hence their cultural confusion at the invention of the parasol.

[asquared-ohgodnotthehorrors]

Feels worth noting

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

a person from 150 years ago would be terrified by modern stuff . however , a duck from 150 years ago would just be all like ,still got lakes? yes ? okay cool

[elodieunderglass]

“How fleeting are all human passions compared with the massive continuity of ducks.”

― Dorothy L. Sayers, Gaudy Night (1935)

[chatdomestique]

Reblogging again because I thought they changed the quote so I decided to look up the actual quote and it’s not fake that is very much the actual quote

[finnglas]

when i was a tiny baby queer (aka a 24-year-old), i went to my first pride festival probably three months after i kicked ex-gay therapy to the curb and came out to my parents. being the people they are, my parents came with me. they weren’t really sure about this whole gay thing, but they loved me and wanted me to be safe and happy and wanted to be involved in what was important to me, so they came along. (i also think my mother still might have thought i might get drugged or murdered or beaten by a protester of which there were plenty.)

anyway i wanted a memento of my first pride, you know, and this one vendor was selling keyrings, and i liked it, so i bought one. do you remember those italian charm bracelets that were all the rage like 10-15 years ago? it was a keychain like that, and it had a rainbow rooster, a rainbow cat, and then just a rainbow, and so I bought it.

i run into my mom a couple of vendors over and she goes oh you bought something? what’d you get? so i showed her, and i was like, “I’m not sure why it’s a rooster and a cat. Seems kind of random. But I liked the rainbows.”

and my mom, who was some form of minister’s wife for most of my childhood and teenagerhood, stares at me like she thinks i’m joking.

“What?” i say.

“…it’s a cock and a pussy, Jules,” she says flatly, and that is the story of how i died at the age of 24 while attending my first pride festival.

[finnglas]

I love how every June this one gets dug up and passed around again, lmao.

[finnglas]

oh no is this what we’re doing now

[finnglas]

…relic…

*crumbles and blows away on the wind*

[theknightlywolfe]

When the CEO of the company that didn't turn away Nazi business says "this isn't going to work" you know it's bad.

[unrelatedwaffle]

404 has been knocking it out of the park since they started. Please support their original reporting on this! If you subscribe to nothing else I highly recommend them. Their podcast is great too.

Microsoft Wants to 'Make People Addicted' to its New AI Assistant, Internal Documents Reveal

Planning documents for "Scout" say the plan is to "make people addicted" to the tool before adding new features.

[rainbow-femme]

You know a little detail I love in The Martian book? That Mark is obviously smart, but to different degrees depending on the subject.

He’s a mechanical engineer and a botanist. This makes him especially good at math, biology, food science, physics, and techy stuff that involves building things or taking stuff apart and making it do something else and general problem solving

He’s also generally good at chemistry. He knows that to make water he can breakdown hydrazine, but doesn’t think about the fact that it would cause the place to fill with hydrogen and almost blow up until it does. He also knows you exhale some oxygen each time you breathe, but doesn’t know how much.

He knows that solar panels are held at a 14 degree angle but doesn’t know why, and only knows the angle because he was in charge of setting them up

When he gets injured he doesn’t say what muscles, just that his back hurts. He fixes most of his muscle injuries with pain killers and warm baths while thinking about how the medic would have more detailed instructions

He has no idea how the pilot is so good at pilot stuff, and never differentiates different kinds of rocks like the geologist would

It’s just cool to have a smart character who is smart at things that make sense for their degrees and experience. So many characters get the Sherlock Holmes treatment where they’re good at whatever the plot needs, but in this case the book uses his blind spots as part of the plot. He knows enough chemistry to solve problems but not enough to anticipate the problems the chemistry would cause as well. It’s refreshing to have a book where what a character is bad at, or just not super good at, works with the story rather than just getting glossed over or having the character magically good at everything because if you know botany obviously you also know anatomy and geology and meteorology, etc

[blondejaneblonde]

“…knows enough chemistry to solve problems but not enough to anticipate the problems…” is such a good way to put it.

[lilinternetwarrior]

“Each crewman had their own laptop. So I have six at my disposal. Rather, I had six. I now have five. I thought a laptop would be fine outside. It’s just electronics, right? It’ll keep warm enough to operate in the short term, and it doesn’t need air for anything. 

It died instantly. The screen went black before I was out of the airlock. Turns out the “L” in “LCD” stands for “Liquid.” I guess it either froze or boiled off. Maybe I’ll post a consumer review. “Brought product to surface of Mars. It stopped working. 0/10.””

[modogoblin]