AwakenTheMusic

(They/Them, She/Her) Agendered Aromantic Asexual, Destiel Shipper, Fanfic Writer. In case of emergency, find me on Bluesky, Ao3, and Dreamwidth under the same username.

[awakenthemusic]

i have no idea what the hell is going on anymore. feel free to follow me on Bluesky, Ao3, and Dreamwidth under the same username i guess???

(i just got the dreamwidth a couple of days ago tbh, there's literally nothing on there yet, but i am liking the retro vibes. religious extremism kept me from having a livejournal when it was popular and i feel like this could be healing for me)

[hiveswap]

Everyone go look up the song nasa banned from space

[hiveswap]

Don't forget to play it loud as fuck

[kowai-kabuki-tanuki]

please….listen to the whole thing. And imagine that you are IN SPACE in 1973 and you JUST woke up. Every time you adjust…it escalates somehow.

This song had to be designed in a lab for the sole purpose of fucking with astronauts. whoever added it to the NASA playlist was a genius.

[seasononesam]

Yoink!

[shallowseeker]

very detailed human sacrifice au in my head nooooo

maybe working title: what the mountain takes

village where virgin maiden sacrifices are common to ensure the crops yield etc etc. it's sanctioned by mysterious forces that come down the mountains wearing masks and armor and standing silent and unmoved as they slaughter the innocents and put them on the pyre

the ritual sacrifices takes place on hallowed ground that only virgins can cross into

it doesn't happen that often, but often ENOUGH

some villagers consider it an honor. others fester with resentment

///

anyhoo... preying on that villager resentment, the RECRUITER (yellow-eyed demon) comes sometimes, in secret, in the night, to recruit strong soldiers with the promise of stopping the sacrifices and toppling the mysterious regime on high

(none of the village soldiers ever return ofc; it happened to deanna, to samuel, to HENRY; vanished into thin air)

///

enter john, who is a piece of shit pressuring his kids to train train train just in case they get snatched by the YED but FORBIDS them from volunteering as soldiers proper for the YED (YED CANNOT take them without the father's consent/blessing)

ALSO in addition to working them like dogs and turning them into shadow assassins, he also pressures his kids to lose their virginity super fucked up early so they don't become sacrifices to water the crops

///

sam loves jess, but her family are super chaste believers of the fertility rite, so she spurns sam's sexual advances. repeatedly

sam thinks his dad is a dick because dad is like, "sammy. if you love that girl, you'll rape her."

and ofc

she gets picked

and after sam loses jess to the maiden sacrifice, he rots inside.

he wants revenge

///

enter rowena.

she wants revenge. with black magic. wants to trick the mountaineers into sacrificing her... she's sewn a spell inside herself that will revive her. black magic stuff that will get her behind enemy lines, samuel.

if they can get her up to the mountain, samuel, they can curse it.

Sam is SOLD.

and well rowena's no virgin, but on rare occasions, she tells Sam, if the mountain soldiers are DISHONORED, they will execute and slit the throat of the one who has transgressed.

but that hasn't happened since... mary.

///

with sam's help, rowena transgresses.

she's sentenced to death.

for this particular crime, zachariah* the Supreme high-ranking collector comes down from on high

while he's here, though, he decides it's a REAL good time to do a maiden sacrifice too

you know, to wash away rowena's defilement.

john at this point is freaking out because

a) this happened to mary so big big triggered b) he has a bad feeling about this and c) he knows sam is FUCKING hiding something

///

because zachy is a great big bag of manipulative dicks

he chooses dean for the virgin sacrifice

and everyone gasps because like... dean's no virgin.

zachariah says LOL that's no problem for us. he beckons one of his big, scary soldiers forward

"purify him."

the soldier raises a hand and... SHOULDER GRIP HOT HOT HOT and we get tbh first sense that these mountaineer fuckers aren't fucking HUMAN

with a BURN OF HOT COAL AND BIG WINGS, this soldier purifies dean and wha-la.: dean can now cross into virgin territory for the virgin sacrifice ritual

john is furious.

and zachariah is like lmao we can do whatever we feel is RIGHT ok. sit back an be honored, john winchester.

and john is desperate and offers himself up for dean ofc

the soldier keeps on holding a struggling dean as another soldier steps forward and then john gets purified and sacrificed

and sam is SCREAMING because rowena doesn't SEEM to be coming back to life and whoa this is backfiring this isn't what he wants

then john dies yay

///

and sam and dean are left there in the ruins of all that.

sam doesn't -CAN'T- tell dean the truth, that his whackadoo plan got dad killed, but he is even hotter for revenge.

enter YED.

but now that JOHN* is dead, they can consent to recruitment.

sam volunteers.

dean, distraught, goes with him.

[shallowseeker]

I had cuh-razy nightmares about this all night damn

When they summit the mountain with YED it's with a lot of other recruits and it becomes apparent to Dean that THIS isn't adding up either. It's a lot of tests.

YED keeps saying he knows "the way up" but the way up is looking like while the mountain demands sacrifices, the rebellion will too

Predictably, when Dean argues with the YED the YED stabs him in the back and leaves him for dead

so, dean and sam are separated dundunduuun

Then Dean is rescued by a patrolman wearing a mask...

[shallowseeker]

I guess i need to add this note so i don't forget it

#cas is ofc going to try to convince dean the way the mountain does things is necessary and right

#he's also going to tell dean of what sam did w rowena to drive the wedge further

cas is working against dean and his village (because the mountain is still evil ofc)

but they do fight together and get closer for it

and as they go on the mountain, there are human virgin traps dotting the landscape and dean begs cas to just undo the purity thingy because that should be easy, riiiight?

and cas is like no. i can't do that with just a wave of my hand there's only one way and it would be a transgression. but eventually he relents but they have to travel to somewhere secure to do that and they both feel a Way about it

cas leads them to an isolated valley, into the mouth of a cave, down a narrow ledge of spikes and into a safety where he barricades the entrance with rubble and dean is like

wow overkill, much? I know it's a transgression or whatev but jeez

and dean is continuing to feel a Way about the whole thing

but is in fact very sad that it seems cas isn't even planning to remove his soldier's mask 😔😔😔

[shallowseeker]

SO there they are in what this ask has dubbed Transgression cave...

Cas still in his scary-ass military mask, his top armor and vestments ON, his leather gloves STILL ON, but hilariously.... his pants off.

And Dean is trembling anyway even though he can't see this crazy guy's face and he's trying to make a joke of it, because between the two of them DEAN is the one with EXPERIENCE, but he's the one who's a Virgin... getting Officially re-deflowered or whatever. And Cas is a virgin but not a Virgin because of his Winterized-religious-military status, and it's INSANE, really.

Cas could at LEAST take the gloves off. Right?

(Please?)

EDIT: I think this is called The face of the mountain now

yay

[inkskinned]

i was the exception to the rule. i should be the ambassador of the american dream. i did it all right.

we were dirt poor. my parents sacrificed a lot so i could be in an area where the schools were exceptional. we all bootstrapped. i paid my own way through college and grad school. i have student debt, but not a lot of it. it took me a long time and a lot of jobs and working and connections and luck and all of it.

now i make good money at a good (remote!) job with pretty good health insurance. I have vision and dental. they even offer pet insurance and 6 free meetings with a therapist. i work with an exceptionally sweet manager, i like my team, and i don't mind the job. i make much more than some of my friends.

so why the fuck can't i afford to eat.

i looked it up. ten years ago, my current salary would amount to 106 thousand american dollars. it was "well over" median wage.

my position's base salary (according to what i could find) has only increased by about 3 thousand dollars. after all, the work has not changed drastically. estimates say that for me to live "comfortably" in this city, i'd need to be making 139,776 dollars a year, before taxes. i am making half of that.

i always bristle when someone on the other side says something about how we just don't want to work, how it's really about me and my failure to succeed. that i need to be pushier, flashier, better; and then capitalism will work out for me.

in the car yesterday, she said that america is probably fucked. that the amount of damage trump is doing to america is largely permanent. i have difficulty arguing with her. prices went up during the pandemic, and then they just - stayed there. i want to believe in the inevitable rise of the human spirit (you know i'm an optimist) but the truth of the matter feels like a smeared handprint - i have no proof it gets easier.

elon musk becomes or unbecomes a trillionaire. we spend billions of dollars in a pointless war. health insurance companies kill people in cold blood. ai "takes over" jobs; assigns you a random number score for your resume so you are automatically rejected by the system. you're fired to make more profit for the shareholders; they rehire someone else for half of your pay. the government spends millions of dollars to destroy national monuments. the white house needs a ballroom. the fbi just posted that they can preemptively arrest someone for domestic terrorism for "extreme" beliefs about america. when i went to go check my facts about that - i found that the this fucking government website has an email sign-up popup that covers the entire page & i literally could not figure out how to close it.

so yeah, the price of eggs is not going to go down. the cost of RAM is not going to go down. why would it. in the free market, without regulation, all the companies really need to worry about is how else they can bleed a stone.

sometimes when people my age make fun of gen z or gen alpha for being unwilling to work; i think about the lie we've been telling them. because i am not an unusual case. so fucking many of us did it "right". so many of us put our heads down and agreed to the terms and conditions. this was how you do it, right.

almost none of my friends own a house. all of us are in our 30s.

it's apocryphal and likely didn't happen as written, but the myth goes that when Marie Antoinette was told that the general population was starving and had no bread to eat; her chipper reply was so let them eat cake.

there's a 250 foot ferris wheel breaking down on the national mall right now. i can't afford gas, but whatever. our nation's birthday is coming.

i am told to keep trying. do the impossible. solve the puzzle, open the portal. coupon your way to success, high yield savings, skip the coffee break. hustle harder, show up early, leave late. the problem is you, right. it's how you're living life. just keep going!

look forward to the cake.

[lazarrusrising]

Dean actually comes up with increasingly ridiculous reasons to get Cas in his room around bed time so he can fall asleep knowing Cas is there because he sleeps so good when he knows Cas is watching over him, let's talk about this case, yeah lemme just stretch out on my bed, I'm just resting my eyes, very satisfied snoring... Cas just rolls his eyes and decides to rearrange Dean's guns by some arbitrary system (again) or read all of his books (again) until Dean wakes up

[rawwwka]

[ anguish ]

should you vanish, so would I.

[werepires]

in hindsight I probably should have made dean hold the mixtape . it’s been almost 2 years since the last one but the shitty romance novel covers are back! (here is part 1)

[werepires]

Your Honour,,,,, this man is so touch starved,,,

[ninanation]

Come to think of it, it really is insane that my entire country is burning alive and literally no one in the rest of the world cares. Thousands of Indians are dying every day from the heat, it's 45+ degrees in multiple areas, the government couldn't give two fucks, we're getting severe warnings and red alerts, and not a soul outside of South Asia is speaking about it because why would you ever care about brown people

[ninanation]

please keep talking about how Becky from Maryland doesn't like the rising gas prices. It's clearly the more pressing issue.

[creacher-art]

USA folks, that is a consistent temperature range hitting 113°. Death Valley temperatures. In Banda, it hovered between 116°-118° (47°-48° C) for a week straight.

This has been happening all month with little to no international media attention. Here are a few organizations you can check out for resources or to support:

ActionAid India

SEEDS India

GlobalGiving

Raise India (Project Tapan)

[shallowseeker]

Dean and Cas taking a shower together in the communal shower room at the bunker but really they're just hanging out

[shallowseeker]

#They had started a conversation on the way to the bathroom#And dean said it was weird for cas to be in there if he wasn’t showering#So Cas got undressed and into a shower so the conversation could continue via @destielrotsmybrain

Exactly! And Dean just went with it, and now it's a routine.

///

You'd think Jack would follow them in there since they're obv just chatting and there are a BILLION stalls he could use it's COMMUNAL

but he does NOT

[shallowseeker]

#jack will happily go in there if ONE of them is alone in their stall#but something in his little brain stops him otherwise#sam one day: where are they#jack: they're taking a shower#sam: go tell them (x) case details#jack: no <3#sam: why not???

So sam's ofc like - FINE then -EYE- will go tell them the important and super pressing plot details

So he goes in there and he's like "Hey guys, get this,"

and they both poke their sudsy heads out and Sam is like WAIT ❗❗❗ ARE YOU GUYS IN THERE NAKED ❗❗❗

To which Dean is like, "Duh."

Cas: "Do you bathe with YOUR clothes on, Sam?"

And Sam is like "NO but you're in there..." (together) "...naked"

And Dean is like "Bodies are beautiful, natural things, Sammy."

[lazarrusrising]

No because even if they never had sex, even if they never kissed, Dean still holds Cas like a lover does, watches the shape of his mouth through every conversation, trusts his hands to heal if he telegraphs his pain, carries his bloody coat from car to car until he can make sure it's returned to where if belongs, makes space at every table right at his side always within reach, brings his head up off the hard concrete and cradles it away from further discomfort, wraps his body in the lone grief of the widowed, let's himself lean into embrace like it's the only time he's able to relax, is brought to his knees at the threat of absence, even if all they ever had went unspoken Dean's body doesn't lie about what was there and what was there was love

[rohirric-hunter]

I am sort of frustrated about that post I made about Google Gemini giving an AI summary of Tumblr users if you google a URL because it quickly turned into a long post where people started sharing all the things the AI got wrong about them, and I'm not saying it isn't good for a laugh when an AI is wrong, but I feel like people are missing the point. Who cares if the AI offers information about you that's wrong? What's worrying is all the information the AI got right.

That initial accidental google I did of a mutual returned an AI summary that was absolutely correct, and featured information about them that would not have been obvious from a quick perusal of their blog. The first few times I googled myself the AI overview was 100% correct. The version of that post that is circulating is not the one where I shared that the AI gave me someone's real name. I had hoped that it had screwed up and it wasn't their real name after all, but no, I checked with them, and just by googling someone's Tumblr URL, I got their honest to goodness legal name. Do you have any idea how dangerous that is? Like yeah I get that it's fun to go, "Haha, AI bad at collecting information," but that's not the problem. The problem is that sometimes AI good at collecting information, and it can collect a lot more a lot faster than a normal human can, by running multiple searches simultaneously and cross-referencing a lot of different documents all in a few seconds, for a level of snooping that would take a real person hours or even days, if they could do it at all.

That is so dangerous and I need people to be angrier about the fact that Google thinks it's okay to let their AI do this for online users. If you google your legal name and you're not already famous the AI won't say shit. Because that would be creepy and invasive! So why does Google think it's all hunky dory to do it for random internet users?

[apollomission8]

If you're reading this and thinking that sounds incredibly scary/unsafe, please go into your blog settings and make sure the setting to discourse external searching is turned on!!!!

^ it should look like this ^

I've had that setting on for a long time. When I saw this post I tried googling my account and no AI summary appeared. I decided to experiment, and I turned that setting off and googled my url again–that time the AI summary appeared. It got a lot wrong, but it did get some things right, and had a concerning amount of information considering a few minutes before the AI summary didn't even appear. It also had the state I live in listed, accurately. That's not something I'm super secretive about, I have said it on here before, but it's also not something I necessarily want an AI telling someone umpromted just because they Googled my URL–frankly I think it's absolutely insane that the AI is able to do that without people questioning it. I quickly turned the discourage external searching setting back on, and I'm no longer getting the AI overviews. But it's definitely something we all should be aware of–especially on other social media sites that don't have that feature.

[defectivegembrain]

[ID: screenshot of a setting turned to the on position. It reads:

Discourage external searching of apollomission8

External search engines like Google or Yahoo will be discouraged from indexing your blog and showing it in search results. It is ultimately up to them to honor your request.

Link text next to this reads: Learn more]

[mathsbian]

You have to do this individually for each blog you own.

[beybuniki]

Cas in the bunker

[scoobydoodean]

Samgirls talking about season 4 Dean's fear of season 4 Sam turning himself into a monster is often so funny because much like season 4 Sam... they... simply forget that Dean spent 40 years in hell being tortured... and that that process is in fact the process that creates demons in the Supernatural universe. Dean was being corrupted toward demonhood for four decades. Sam was simply speedrunning the "becoming a demon" process by drinking blood (a far more pleasant process than the way it happened to Dean).

When Dean gets terrified of Sam turning into a monster (a demon!) it's not a dogmatic "monster bad" or "Dad said so" coming from Mr I Have Never Experienced The Pain Of Slowly Turning Into A Monster. Dean literally had experienced that. He told Sam about it and everything (and then Sam called him a pussy about it like 17 times in a row and ignored it so so do samgirls I guess. It never happened since Sam said it was no big deal and Dean was actually just a wuss.)

When Dean is extremely adamant about Sam not turning himself into a monster he is speaking from having actually felt what that is like. It is Dean being terrified for Sam over something that Dean himself has actually experienced beginning to happen to him. It's just when it was happening to Dean, it was in a context where he could not stop it, while Sam is repeatedly making the choice to keep doing this to himself for a variety of Reasons™️.

[dean-mikaelson]

thinking about how dean saw people in the bunker, so he ordered pizza, locked himself in his room and watched his comfort movies in funny socks

[winchester-reload]

Wishing everyone a happy 2021. Now no one step on anything or start any damn Homer Simpson-style butterfly effects, please.