Love letter for my future
I have never considered myself an intellectual.
My right side of the brain and my unmeasurable creativity have never let me excel academically. Always a 80 on average in report cards, and bad for sports, math, and philosophy.
I’m not intellectual, but a innate sage.
I like to analyze things emotionally and with creativity. Search for little stars in between the crowd and recognize the good work between my kin. Thus, I always try to acquire knowledge, meditations, and good vibes.
Enemies, I don’t have. Neither, I have treachery.
I’ve always considered myself wiser than the others that have my same age or idiosyncrasy, since I have details of my daily life that I put a lot of effort, it has been worth it.
Recently, I’ve thought a lot about my behavior and modus operandi if I ever have a significant other again.
People that have no knowledge about my love life, it is simple: I have had an official relationship since 17 years ago, my only boyfriend killed himself, I was celibate for 6 years, demisexual, sapiosexual, and incredibly selective.
The next advice are for myself, a reminder of what I believe I must do the have an interesting and pleasant relationship.
It’s the most important one. It’s a failure of respect, breaks the trust, and the atmosphere becomes stressful, untrustworthy, and a heartache. Once stalked, breakup for sure.
2.- RESPECT FOR TIME AND SPACE
It’s paramount. Mostly when those people enjoy solitude and/or time with their friends. One must know when to dismiss herself and wish sincerely that that time when he’s not with you it is a good time.
3.- ENJOY A REAL FRIENDSHIP
Be friends above all, enjoy the chatting, to learn to be with that person without touching. To know what he thinks about other women and learn about his beauty cannons. Let him know about yours. Be sincere, don’t be hiding people or situations because of fear that he might react in a bad way. Communicate worries and ideas that you wouldn’t tell anyone else. Let be your confident. Listen to them about his professional passions. Listen about triumphs and failures. Help when there’s a problem. A real friend. Listen about past relations, without jealousy, without rage; what happened, happened; those stories mold that person and his way of loving.
And after sex, continue being friends. After a breakup, continue being friends.
Do not be scared of silence. Enjoy them. Talk more than with words. Mia Wallace in Pulp Fiction couldn’t have said better.
Mia Wallace: Don’t you hate that?
Mia: Uncomfortable silences. Why do you feel it’s necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?
Vincent: I don’t know. That’s a good question.
Mia: That’s when you know you’ve found somebody really special: you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably share silence.
5.- AVOID RUMORS AND GOSSIP
Don’t be a goal of gossip. And the most accurate way to do so is when the relationship does not come to the light. There can be speculations, but it can only be known if it is asked directly.
That commitment is just for myself. It is best, when it’s reciprocated.
7.- STAY AWAY FROM THE INTERNET WHEN I’M WITH MY SO
The internet is a vague and cheap copy of our identity. Mostly, social media. I like to be given my rightful place, and while you’re online while with your SO, it’s not a complete place.
Have enough trust for no lying, hide, or distort my identity. It is one of the best freedoms that we can have: be yourself beside the person that loves you. That someone knows you when you’re on your own. In my opinion, it is sublime.
Respect our opinions, advice, insanity, knacks, rarities, defects, virtues, experiences, perceptions, vices. Try not to change them and accept that person just the way he is (best if reciprocated). Even when there’s a dispute. Try to be the most responsible and mature to not fall in insults or offenses.
No. I’m not intellectual. Nonetheless, I’m certain that my next significant other will not let me go.