meta obsessed

At the moment, mainly Tolkien, HP, (anti)GoT and ASoIaF. Generally also SW, MCU and Sherlock. Oh, and my fics, from any of the aforementioned verses.

[adhd-wifi]

A Fic Pet Peeve as a Chinese Person

MDZS fic writers, please stop changing Jiang YanLi’s name to “Jin YanLi” just cuz she got married to peacock golden boy. Even back in Old China, if you and your partner were (essentially) of equal status, you never change your family name to that of your spouse’s, even as a woman. The concept of “maiden names that are automatically changed upon marriage” isn’t really a thing. If a name change happens, it’s because an individual specifically chooses to take on the name formally (or forced to cuz of whatever nonsense reason). Still, it’s more common for name changes to happen by adoption rather than marriage.

In the case of Jiang YanLi marrying into the Jin Sect, her title is now (Young) Madam Jin, but her name is still Jiang YanLi. In her mother’s case, her name being Yu ZiYuan isn’t a big deal, it’s normal. It was the fact that she was referred to, as a title, as Madam Yu, despite being the Madam of the Jiang Sect, which suggested she took pride in her birth family roots over her marriage into the Jiang Sect. So, please, if you want to call her Jin YanLi please at least put in like one line of her wanting to take on the married name instead of her family name.

Anyways I just needed to get this off my chest ‘kay thanks bye

[drwcn]

I second this!!! I think this last name thing is really non-intuitive to someone not used to the way Chinese titles work and how it’s recorded. And also the fact that for majority of Chinese history marriage was polygamous and so women’s last name were used to differentiate the wives of one husband.

(I think even the original MDZS text gets it wrong sometimes.)

(there’s also the variation that comes with different dynasties…but we won’t go there)

1. The Lady of the House

So “fu'ren” 夫人 is the equivalent of “Lady”, and (for the most part) this is ONLY used for the main wife of a man, the 妻 “Qi”. Therefore, Yu Ziyuan, the wife of Jiang Fengmian should be Lady Jiang or 江夫人 “jiang-fu'ren”. Sometimes to introduce the wife to someone who’s never met her, we can also include her last name in the introduction. For example, 这位是江夫人余氏。“This is Jiang fu’ren, of Yu-shi”. 

The word “shi” 氏 means “clan”. It is considered sometimes to be impolite for a stranger to know the actual “name” of a woman if he is not her family or close assoicate. This rule is not followed in most wuxia stories and fictional works, but it is in history. So to track which family wives are from, their maiden last name is always kept. The “shi” of a woman is never changed after marriage because well…you can’t change which family you’re born in. 

The story refers to Yu Ziyuan as Yu-fu’ren. This is literally a mistake. >_>

A married women may be referred by both the “shi” of her husband and her father. So in the case of Yu Ziyuan, in a legal document (if she was ever like…idk summoned in court or something) she will referred to as “Jiang-Yu shi”. 

Now, for Jiang Yanli, because Jin Zixuan’s mother was still alive and the head of the family is Jin Guangshan at the time Zixuan and Yanli got married, technically Jin Zixuan’s mother is “Jin fu’ren”, and Yanli should be referred to as “shao fu’ren”. 少 “shao” means “younger”. So “Lady Jiang the younger” is essentially what that means, indicating that Jiang Yanli is the wife of the son of the family.  

Addendum: In certain dynasty, the term “da niang-zi” 大娘子 is also used to describe the wife. In which case, her own maiden name would be used. So this might be why Yu Ziyuan is called Madam Yu. Because if she’d been born in let’s say the Song dynasty, she could be called 余大娘子 “yu-da’niang’zi”. Regardless of that, she should still be 江夫人 Jiang fu’ren.   

2. The other non-wives and the use of last names 

The above described in #1 is referring to the legal wife of a man. Even in polygamous China, every man only has 1 wife. The rest of the women he marries are not wives. The term used for them is 妾 “qie”. Because a man can have as many non-wives are he can afford (ugh), you have to differentiate them somehow. If the husband’s last name was Li, for example, it would be wrong to call the concubines “Li fu’ren”. Depending on the dynasty, terms like “xiao-niang” 小娘, “tai-tai” 太太 are used. So a concubine with the last name Cheng, married to a man with the last name Li, would be referred to as “Cheng-xiao’niang of the Li family.”  

When in doubt, as in you see a man with a woman who is definitely his spouse but not sure if she’s wife or concubine, you should always assume the woman is the wife until corrected or told otherwise. So you may see a inn keeper refer to a concubine as “fu’ren” out of respect.  

Sometimes, to show respect to a concubine, you can refer to them as “fu’ren” as well but with a number attached. For example if concubine Cheng was ranked number two in her husband’s household, she could be referred to as “Li-er-fu’ren” 李家二夫人 or just  二夫人 “er-fu’ren”, meaning she’s the second woman her husband married. 

3. The term “fu’ren” used as “Mrs.” 

The term “fu’ren” can be used generally to refer to any woman who is married. It would be impolite to refer to a woman as “gu’niang”, because “gu’niang” means Miss, an unmarried female. In a context where you don’t know who the woman’s husband is, or her rank in the family, a married woman should be addressed by strangers, workers, salesperson, doctors, as “fu’ren”. 

And how do you know if a woman’s married? From her hair. A married woman’s hair should be dressed up in an updo. Low-dos are reserved for maidens. The fact that Jiang Yanli’s hair didn’t change pre and post marriage is historical inaccuracy. 

But this is wuxia, a fantasy drama, so the rules are a bit lax. 

4. Royal titles. 

The above refers to nobles or commoners. Royals have their own set of titles and depending on the dynasty, that shit gets real complicated, so the titles of the wives of emperors and dukes and such we’re not gonna talk about because it’s irrelevant to CQL. 

[adhd-wifi]

(I was trying to edit this but I accidentally deleted it my apologies)

Anyways, again, thanks for expanding on this. I didn’t know most of this information and I’ll be keeping this post for future reference.

Btw, I don’t mean to come off as rude or anything, but I would like to point out you used the wrong character for Yu ZiYuan’s name. She uses 虞, not 余.

[drwcn]

Oh shoot. Yeah that’s my bad! Thanks for letting me know.

Also I realized I made a typo above. Jiang Yanli’s title should be Lady Jin the younger 金家少夫人。

(and while i’m at it, i apologize for stealing your post and adding a bit more info) 

5. Class division, age division and the use of titles

Because in Chinese there’s no universal “ma’am” that we can apply to every woman… Things get complicated.

“gu’niang” or  “Miss”, is an entirely appropriate title to apply to any unmarried young woman of most social class (except for maybe princesses and duchesses). When in doubt of a woman’s marital status and if she is relatively young, the default is to assume she is unmarried, and use “gu’niang”. (Of course, if it is known that she is married and you still use gu’niang, it would be seen as an offence as stated in 3, except for some very particular cases.) 

So if Jiang Yanli is walking down the street and trips, and a strange who has no idea who she is tried to help her, they will call her gu’niang, because it is not obvious from way she looks that she is married. 

Now if her hair is in an up-do and the person suspects she is married, they will refer to her differently depending if Jiang Yanli is a) dressed as a peasant or as nobility/wealthy person, and b) if the person is older or younger than her: 

If Yanli looks rich/noble/well-to-do -> default to “fu’ren”. That’s totally a-okay for literally everyone to use.

If she looks poor/peasant, AND if the speaker is someone younger and/or same generation as her, it is okay to call her “大嫂” da’sao or “大姐” da’jie. Da’sao = wife of a older brother, and da’jie = older sister. If the stranger is kind of the same age and it’s hard to tell who’s younger and who’s older, give the person you’re speaking to the seniority as a sign of respect until further information is given. 

If she looks poor/peasant, and the person talking to her is WAY older than her, like an uncle or a grandma, then it is STILL OKAY to call her “gu’niang”, even if she is married. 

However, if the woman you encounter is older, as in way past the age that ancient society expected a woman to be married (like clearly could be someone’s mom or grandma) how you address her will depend on her social status. 

If she looks rich/noble/well-to-do -> default to “fu’ren” or “liao-fu’ren” if she looks elderly. 

If she looks poor/peasant, she can be addressed as Sister (大嫂， 大姐), Auntie (i.e. 大妈，大婶，大娘）or Grandma (阿婆，奶奶，婆婆) depending her age and the age of the speaker. It is very weird to call a peasant woman “fu’ren”, because the term fu’ren implies a certain social status and/or education level. 

When titles like ‘gu’niang’, sister, auntie or grandma is use, the woman’s own last name should be used in conjunction, not the last name of her husband.    

[adhd-wifi]

@tofixit Consider the post hijacking fully forgiven because I’m Chinese and I didn’t know a lot of this (I didn’t live in China most of my life, I lived in Singapore, so I didn’t learn this stuff and was also busy with Japanese and other things LMAO), so you’re giving me some new knowledge about my heritage! So thanks! Didn’t expect my complaining about maiden names to come to this but I’m enjoying it lol

[sol1056]

A lot of nuances I only catch when they’re absent (in the translation). But then, I’m still back on the recent oddity of translating “young master” as “childe”, an incredibly archaic form of address. ‘Master’ is still an english form of address (though somewhat formal and out-of-favor these days) for a young man under the age of 18 (basically, just to differentiate that ‘mister’ is anyone over 18). 

I can roll with ‘second young master’ as easily as I can ‘third uncle’ or ‘senior sister’ – these may not be arranged in a way we’re used to in english, but they are all using common english words and therefore we can suss out the meaning when reading at subtitle-speed. but if the translation introduces a term that’s just as unfamiliar as the foreign word it’s purporting to translate, then imo it’s a translation fail. 

[pumpkinpaix]

*pokes head in* This is all really cool information that I also didn’t know and really appreciate!

@drwcn I did want to say a small thing in defense of MXTX re: Yu-fu’ren (also not intended to be rude!! you’re right that mdzs plays pretty fast and loose with titles, names, historical details etc. ><) but in the case of referring to her as Yu-fu’ren instead of Jiang-fu’ren, I do think that mxtx knew that was incorrect. In chapter 51, it says, “虞夫人就是江澄的母亲，虞紫鸢。当然，也是江枫眠的夫人，当初还曾是他的同修。照理说，应该叫她江夫人，可不知道为什么，所有人一直都是叫她虞夫人。有人猜是不是虞夫人性格强势，不喜冠夫姓。对此，夫妇二人也并无异议。”

loose tl for those who can’t read it (my sympathies, i too am struggling), “Yu-fu’ren was Jiang Cheng’s mother, Yu Ziyuan. Of course, she was also Jiang Fengmian’s wife [fu’ren], and once cultivated with him as well. By all reason, she should be called Jiang-fu’ren, but for some unknown reason, everyone had always called her Yu-fu’ren. Some guessed that perhaps because Yu-fu’ren had a forceful temperament, she disliked taking her husband’s name. Neither husband nor wife raised any objections to this.” (sorry this is clunky im v tired)

So it is a mistake, but an intentional one, I think! With regards to everything else though, I have almost zero expertise in the subject, and I’m grateful for the commentary!

(we can all agree on childe tho because D: it’s also strange because it’s such an english-specific word with english culture-specific connotations?? why)

[autumnalfallingleaves]

@codywanweek Day Four: One of Cody's antennae is linked to a tracker in Obi's lightsaber

I am all for "Obi-Wan's lightsaber really likes Cody and that's why he finds it every time it gets lost", but this is a very funny prompt as it stands and I just had to get silly with it :)

reblogs are highly appreciated, and please do not repost my art

[barbarakaterina]

CodyWan Wekk Day 7: Modern AU - Academia

Cody loved all aspects of Pride.

Most of his queer brothers tended to show up mostly for the parties, and obviously they all went to the Parade, but he always tried to take in as many of the lectures and panel discussions as possible, too. Not that he objected to a good party, but the educational program tended to be so <i>interesting</i>.

This one was shaping up to be especially so, though in a rather different way than Cody was used to. 

It was a lecture by some big shot academic especially invited for this purpose from London, about LGBTQIA+ in different religious traditions across time. Religion wasn’t normally Cody’s area of interest, but he’d decided to come and listen to this, given how prestigious the guest was.

He was already feeling grateful he had, because even if nothing else came of it, the guy was hot.

He seemed to be in his mid thirties or so, so older than Cody but not so much that it would be a problem, and he had long red hair tied in a bun and beard that made Cody wish he could feel it absolutely everywhere. He was very glad now that he’d picked the first row and would have a completely unobstructed view. Even if the lecture was completely boring, he’d leave happy.

And then the guy started speaking.

“Good afternoon, everyone,” he said in a perfect honeyed voice that had Cody melting. “My name is Obi-Wan Kenobi, and I want to thank you for your attendance and the warm welcome,” he nodded to the host. “This is my first time in Prague, actually, but it will definitely not be the last. Now, to start, I should clarify that I will not focus on modern Christianity much. Frankly, there is enough information about that out there, and there are better qualified people to speak on it. So if you came here for Christianity, sorry to say, you would be better served by some other events. Now, let’s get to it…”

Cody was falling in love.

The feeling only intensified as the lecture went on, discussing different examples from across history and showing what the different approaches had in common and how they differed, dazzling Cody with the simple array of options that existed in approaches to gender and sexuality.

When it came to questions, his hand was one of the first ones up.

“Hello, my name is Cody, and my question is, do you believe we can take inspiration from any of these approaches?” He asked Kenobi when his turn came.

Kenobi looked at him, and then his eyes seemed to sort of snag. “Thank you for the lovely question,” he said slowly, still keeping his eyes on Cody, “but sadly, I’m afraid that it would be rather complicated. All of these approaches I described were rooted in wider cultural ideas and social structure that I didn’t get time to get into here, so that without them, they wouldn’t work.”

Cody frowned, not sure exactly what to imagine with such a brief description. “Could you give an example…?”

“I can try a brief one, but if you are interested in this in detail, I can also recommend some books - come speak to me after the lecture.”

Well, that was just the perfect invitation, so of course Cody did. He wasn’t sure he would be actually reading those books, but a chance to speak to Kenobi one on one was too good to pass up on.

He did, indeed, get a list of books, and then Kenobi said: “Actually, I will be starting a new job here in Prague in the autumn, at the Faculty of Arts, so you could always come to some of my lectures that will be dealing with that, too.”

Oh. Oh.

“That is an absolutely irresistible invitation,” Cody said, leaning just a bit closer and carefully observing Kenobi’s reaction.

His eyes went to Cody’s lips. <i>Score.</i>

“...but if I may, I would extend an invitation for something a little bit sooner, and perhaps a little bit more personal…?”

“Why, Cody,” Kenobi replied, “this is what I would call irresistible.”

-

It's Pride this week in Prague and I wanted to honour it somehow. It's nicely symbolic to have CodyWan week at the same time, though it also means I have less time for writing because of all the Pride events. Anyway, today is Parade Day, so have an academic Pride fic that was very vaguely inspired by the lecture about same-sex marriage in Catholic theology I attended yesterday. Happy Pride to any Czechs reading this!

@codywanweek

[barbarakaterina]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

For Day 6 (actually posted day of, I'm so proud of myself!), I picked "crechemaster Obi-Wan" and "touch starved". Mostly it's a brief AU of "what if Obi-Wan's padawanship didn't suck" though.

[barbarakaterina]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Day 4: Videogame AU. I picked Baldur's Gate 3, because of course I did.

[barbarakaterina]

CodyWan Week Day 2: chasing off suitors with a stick

When Cody finished his conversation with Fox and looked around himself, there was a group of people standing around Obi-Wan, and all of them seemed tipsy, were giving him the kind of looks Cody saw on the covers of Bly’s romance novels, and left lingering touches on his arm from time to time.

Cody gritted his teeth. This, more than anything else, was why he hated galas.

He marched over with a resolute step, and rather loudly said: “Excuse me, sirs.”

All of the people seemed startled, as if woken from a trance. If only they had such an excuse.

“Oh, commander,” one of them said vaguely.

Cody ignored them and pushed his way to Obi-Wan. “Sir,” he declared, again just a bit too loud, “may I speak with you for a moment?”

“Oh, of course,” Obi-Wan replied, giving him one of those empty socialite smiles. “Please excuse me, gentlebeings,” he added to his company, and they all tittered their goodbyes as Cody fairly dragged Obi-Wan away from them.

It took some time to find a spot where they could be reasonably alone, but Cody didn’t relent until he did.

Once they had privacy, Obi-Wan slumped against the wall, his polite smile gone, and Cody scowled at him. “You’re an adult,” he said. “Fully responsible for yourself. So why do I keep finding you in these situations?”

Obi-Wan sighed. “You know I can’t offend them-”

“If they get offended when you tell them no, they deserve to be offended!”

“Perhaps, but sadly, they are rather too important to take into account what they deserve. And you know I often come off as flirtatious without meaning to-”

“Stop,” Cody said sharply. “You are not asking for it in any way, shape or form. The only single issue on your part is that you refuse to clearly communicate your lack of interest!” Cody realised his voice was rising, and forced himself to be quiet and gentle. “It worries me, Obi-Wan,” he said.

“I know, my dear.”

Cody hesitated. “Have you…spoken to your mind healer about this?”

Obi-Wan exhaled. “There are enough other things to discuss, I’m afraid, that take priority.”

Cody got that - the war had made sure of that - but still… “I’m afraid that one of these days, you will agree to sleep with one of these leeches simply because you won’t wish to offend them,” he admitted with brutal honesty.

Obi-Wan shrugged, and Cody grew even more alarmed. “Obi-Wan, you hate sex!”

“Jedi do not hate,” Obi-Wan replied. “It’s slightly uncomfortable, that’s all. I’ve certainly gone through more discomfort for missions - in fact, I do for almost all missions.”

Cody gritted his teeth. He shouldn’t project his own feelings onto Obi-Wan, he knew. <i>He</i> might feel like crawling out of his skin at the mere idea of engaging in anything sexual, but Obi-Wan’s aversion was not the same. Only…only he worried how much of it was an actual difference between them, and how much was Obi-Wan’s pathological self-sacrificing streak. “Just…promise me to discuss this in your next session?”

Obi-Wan gave him a searching look. “If you believe it’s that important, I will,” he said after a moment.

Cody exhaled in relief. Someone more qualified than him would untangle this. “Good. Now, what do you say we get out of here? Cuddle on the couch with a nice nature documentary?”

For the first time since the evening started, Obi-Wan gave a truly genuine smile. “That, my dear,” he said, “sounds like the perfect plan.”

...and a surprise "aro/ace CodyWan" to boot!

[barbarakaterina]

Guys I have an urgent question

I have this saved in my files as “Galadriel’s ring speech”, but I have no idea where I got it from and it seems suspicious to me

but I suck at both Quenya and tengwar

so

can anyone please tell me if this is, in fact, some rendition of “you offer it to me freely, instead of a dark lord you will set up a queen, not dark, but beautiful and terrible as the morning” etc? Either in English just transcribed into tengwar or in Quenya?

I’m hopeless, and I wanted to have it printed on a T-shirt but obviously I don¨t want to do that if it’s just gibberish…

[almare]

Looks like (inconsistent) dropped-a Quenya… in which it says:

caraval tári yasse lána haru anca. ar avan lán, mal vanama ar rácamav iaran ar i lán! vanya ve i ar ar anar ar i lasse i arantan! naira ve láre ar i calmal! antalca lá talamar ambara. alya ní malva ar mama!

My translation of the passage from yonks ago is: Caruval Tári yassë Lúna Heru engë. Ar úvan lúna, mal vanima ar rúcima ve i Arin ar i Lómë! Vanya ve i Eär ar Anar ar i Lossë i Orontenna! Naira ve Lúrë ar i calimale*! Antulca lá Talmar Ambaro. Ilya ní meluva ar þorya.

So it looks like it’s a badly transcribed version of that or something to that effect.

*”bright-thing” my construct for lightning.

[barbarakaterina]

thank you SO MUCH! I used tecendil transcriber with your translation, I hope you don’t mind.

(also tried to translate “i will diminish, do into the West and remain Galadriel” myself, and I think I’ll just hope no one looks at that aprt too closely lol.)

[barbarakaterina]

Guys I have an urgent question

I have this saved in my files as “Galadriel’s ring speech”, but I have no idea where I got it from and it seems suspicious to me

but I suck at both Quenya and tengwar

so

can anyone please tell me if this is, in fact, some rendition of “you offer it to me freely, instead of a dark lord you will set up a queen, not dark, but beautiful and terrible as the morning” etc? Either in English just transcribed into tengwar or in Quenya?

I’m hopeless, and I wanted to have it printed on a T-shirt but obviously I don¨t want to do that if it’s just gibberish...

[moonwich]

We have Good Omens too

[barbarakaterina]

Mind. Blown.

(Also, taking this more in context... The conclusion of GO is that both heaven and hell are evil, essentially. The conclusion of Anděl páně is that both heaven and hell are essentially good, though rather incompetent. I wonder what that says about national characters...)

[honeyppie-deactivated20240623]

People Marvel has done dirty

Tony stark: giving him a daughter and pseudo-son with a little spit-fire of a child on the side and not letting him have the chance to see them grow up

Morgan Stark: giving her a father that she only knew for five years

Cassie Lang: taking her father away from her over and over again (i know it was Scott’s fault the first few times, but damn ya’ll got some fucking issues with fathers)

Natasha: why did she have to die to clean her record? It was already clean with the good she was doing (aside from Civil War cus that fucked her too)

Feel free to add to the list

[ussthunderquack]

Don’t mind if I do! Hre-hem…. (puts on spectacles, as scroll unravels to the floor, down the stairs and out the door...) 

Natasha: Set her up in A1 as an admittedly cliche, but nontheless likable character; a badass seductress spy, working towards redemption, who clearly has UST with her friend Hakweye. Then abruptly turns Hawkeye into the group “married with kids” guy, to free her up for fan service and cheap romantic plots with all the other male Avengers. Then, just as her actress is nearing the end of her prime, and is no longer Hollywood’s #1 iconic sex symbol anymore, the Russos realize “her story has reached its natural conclusion,” and kill her, before ever letting her have any meaningful interactions with any of the other female characters (many of whom she has an insane amount in common with, including damn near identical backstories). 

Tony Stark: After giving him a ten year story arc about being unhealthily determined to do everything his own way, to the point of refusing help when he needs it, and gradually learning to open up and accept help, the Russos decide to reward Tony’s unhealthy self-hating deathwish/martyr complex, and make him die saving the universe (in a movie about the whole group, and about the Infinity Stones, with the classic “take my hand!” ending of the first GotG movie right there!) 

Because–as with Natasha–god forbid a character with PTSD be able to live with it. No, the only cure to a painful past is a death-”redemption,” even if you’ve already redeemed yourself enough times that the whole rest of the planet Earth should already have “property of Stark Industries” stamped on their asses. 

Also, they love to show us Tony suffering, but at his absolute worst moments, don’t show us his closest friends helping him or standing up for him. To th point that….

Rhodey: …is given an abrupt 180 in IW and turned into e a Cap fanboy, because all minorities must pause to remind the audience how much they approve of Captain Manifest Destiny. 

Steve Rogers: Introduced to us as the relatively responsible and kind-hearted Team Leader, the Russos decided to make him their personal wish fullfilment Gary Stu and political mouthpiece, while paying his story arc so clumsily that by the end, even most of his diehard fans now hate him. 

T’Challa: HAVE WE MENTIONED HOW MUCH RESPECT THE FOREIGN BLACK KING HAS FOR CAPTAIN COLONIALISM AMERICA? No need to show him having any kind of relationships with any of the other Avengers. 

Sam Wilson: He has common sense, thinks things through, and leads PTSD groups, but is always “wrongfully” doubting the inevitable success of Gary Stu. Is given the role of Captain America in a very random ( “left field…?”) manner, after no buildup to that plot point. 

Bucky Barnes: Used as a prop for Steve’s story, until the Russos had no more use for him, and then forgot him. He never got to reconcile with Tony, or even show onscreen feelings about it after Siberia, because all that mattered was him gushing over Steve. 

Then tossed out like an old sock when the Russos feared a run-of-the-mill fan ship/just didn’t need him to make Stu Rogers look good anymore. 

Also won’t be the new Cap, despite the comics, despite hints in previous movies, and despite Tony Stark offering him the job in the comics, and holy shit what that could have been for the MCU characters, because the writers changed their minds at the last minute, or are just not talking to each other. 

Ava Starr: It’s our movie and we’ll snub who we want to.

Peggy Carter: Demoted from badass independent character who happened to have an interesting history with Captain America to Captain America’s last-minute booby prize (at the cost of her kid’s existence and her original marriage). 

Hawkeye: Deemed not worthy of a romantic plotline with Scarltet Johansen, and thus was demoted from “potential ongoing Romance Plotline” to “Group Family Man.” And they couldn’t even be bothered to do much with that; we learn next to zilch about Laura or the kids, and see almost nothing of Ronan. 

Wanda Maximoff: Dear fuck. First they take a Jewish Romani character, whitewash her, and make her join the Nazis. Then they clumsily write her as still being anti-Tony even after she’s looked into his mind and seen his desire to protect the world (not to mention, you know, him being a public hero and publicly shutting down the weapons company she’s supposed to hate him for).

Have her do heinous things in “Ultron,” especially to Bruce Banner and Tony, and then have her barely interact with either of them for th rest of the series, and never mention it again. 

Then try to treat her like she’s still an X-Men mutant, who didn’t ask for her powers and never hurt anyone on purpose, because the chimps forgot they changed her backstory. 

Then make her strongest relationships with Vision (because obligatory forced romance) and Hawkeye (because he needed something to do in the story), resulting in her hanging out the most with the Avengers she hurt the least. 

As a result, her character comes across to many as never having to own her past crimes, and the Avengers closest to her onscreen seem unsympathetic towards what happened to the others. So now poor Wanda has a whole hatedom, and I can’t even be mad at them, because the writers did her so dirty.

And of course, she never exchanges one sentence with Natasha Romanoff, the one other female Avenger at the time, whose background is insanely similar to Wanda’s. 

Carol Danvers: After that badass cliffhanger in IW….nothing. They just forgot about her.

Bruce Banner: No movies after “Incredible Hulk,” and none with Mark Ruffalo. No closure with Wanda Maximoff. All his relationships are pretty much left in the dust in “Endgame,” getting bare minimal mentions or nods (his friendships with Tony and Thor, his relationship with Nat). And we get nothing about his pre-Hulk backstory.

Is easily the  most morally pure guy in the group, but is “unworthy” to budge Thor’s hammer, because he dosen’t have heroic muscle tits that certain special something. 

Scott Lang: Like Tony, he’s a designated “anti hero,” and thus isn’t worthy of the sympathy or recognition he’s due, or a last minute retcon Happy Ending. Only men with abs, butt chins and muscle tits who never have to be “wrong” about anything deserve that stuff.  

Thor: Oh shit! Thor’s developed into a respectable, chivalrous, hero and a great literal king? Nooooo! Gary Stu is supposed to be the most nobleist and badaassist and leaderist of the Avengers! Let’s say Thor got fat, and lazy, and isn’t a good leader anymore, and now Steve can wield both of Thor’s weapons, because America Gary Stu our well developed character is better than anyone, even a god! 

[hedgehog-goulash7]

THE TEA RIGHT HERE

[lord0fries]

☕

[rebelmeg]

I have never seen a meta as good as this, explaining just about every single issue I have with the MCU.

[barbarakaterina]

THIS

[demonic-mnemonic]

Sometimes I just sit and think about how Aziraphale and Crowley spent several years giving some ordinary human kid THE weirdest possible upbringing of all time.

[ariaste]

uhhhhhhh fic of Warlock as an adult where he mentions things offhandedly in therapy sometimes and his therapist is EXTREMELYY???????? CONFUSED????????????

[bixbythemartian]

“My parents couldn’t always make the time for me. Well, Mum couldn’t, for a lot of reasons. Dad… didn’t. It was hard to tell the difference from that age, and she made excuses for him, but I understand it now that I’m older.”

The therapist nodded. She wasn’t taking notes, simply leaning back in the comfortable chair across from him, and she was always doing something with her hands. It’s crocheting today, she says she’s making a baby blanket for a friend. Sometimes it was origami, or knitting, sometimes she’d be sewing, and once she was doing some kind of leather work. Braiding something for some reason. 

He’d sat on about every chair and couch in the room before settling on the overstuffed couch. He could sit sideways and not look at her react, or sit up, or whatever. Sometimes he didn’t want to see her face when he said something, and sometimes he had to. 

“Was there anybody who did?” she asked. Her voice was smooth and soothing. She was paying attention to her work, but also paying attention to him. She said that if she’s writing it makes some people nervous, but if she’s doing something else then the conversation feels more casual, even if it’s not.

Every once in a while, she got this look on her face that he suspected means he said something extremely interesting (or upsetting, or whatever) and was trying not to show it, but it never showed in her voice. He liked that about her. 

He nodded. “When I was younger, we had this nanny. I used to just call her Nanny, I don’t remember if I ever knew her name. She was Scottish. She was real weird, but she’d spend as much time with me as I liked. She was always there, if the gardener wasn’t.”

“A gardener as well?” 

He nodded. “He always had time for me. No matter what. He’d drop whatever he was doing to talk to me. He was from… I don’t remember. Very rural, this fellow.” He thought about it. “I don’t know what happened to them. I think they left to do other things, not too long before my eleventh birthday. I never saw them again. He was kind of boring, sometimes, but he always talked to me like I was the most important person he ever saw.”

“Really?”

He nodded. “Nanny would too, actually. I sometimes think that they’re why I’m, you know, not as fucked up as I could be. That just knowing I could go find the gardener and he’d tell me what the rabbits were doing today, whatever he was doing, that I could tell him about… whatever. Or Nanny. She used to tell me to smite my enemies, I was never sure how to take it.” 

It was just a moment and gone, a single expression of sheer bafflement, which made Warlock laugh a little.

Keep reading

[pippinstook]

Ok, so, as most know hobbits LOVE mushrooms, but what if they love ALL mushrooms, even the poisonous ones. What if a hobbit’s body is able to handle more of the poison and it doesn’t affect them at all. And they love it!

[pippinstook]

And then they nearly give Aragorn a heart-attack when they’re heading to Rivendell. 

Pippin, just being pippin: Look, MUSHROoms!!

The other three, running at full speed: MUSHROOMS!

Aragorn, who is a skilled ranger who knows every plant, tree, and flower to survive: No those are poisonous!

Frodo, who’s mouth is stuffed full: No they’re not. We eat these all the time back in the shire.

Merry, speaking with his mouth full, spitting mushroom everywhere: Yeah, they’re definitely not poisonous. Do you want one?

Aragorn, now having an existential crisis: No, n-no. I’m good.

Sam, mumbling under his breath: Well I wasn’t gonna share anyways.

[enide-s-dear]

@penny-anna this seems like your kind of hobbit lore

[elidyce]

… OKAY NO WAIT THIS IS IMPORTANT

What if that’s the reason Sam and Frodo survived in Mordor? 

What if all those references to noxious fumes and tainted water and everything were completely literal? They avoided eating anything made there, but they had to keep drinking and breathing. 

What if part of Mordor’s defenses was that it’s literally poisonous to any creature not specifically bred to live in those conditions? What if Faramir was so careful about warning them about drinking the water because he knew it was fatal? What if Sauron’s general lack of concern about shit going down inside his own borders (aside from treachery, which apparently happened a lot) was knowing that any Mortal Man or Elf or Whatever that wandered in was gonna be stone dead in a few days, and his desire to catch any infiltrators on the borders was to keep them alive long enough for questioning?

And then these two hobbits who have spent their entire lives merrily ingesting enough poisonous fungi for breakfast to give Shelob a stomach-ache trot into Mordor and drink the poisonous waters and breath the poisonous fumes and scratch themselves on the poisonous thorns and feel mildly unwell.

Years later Sam gets a pained note from Faramir asking him how the hell he and Frodo survived when all the water is tainted with arsenic according to the survivors of the exploratory party and Sam writes back confused ‘What’s arsenic, it tasted bad and a bit metallic, that’s all I know honestly’ and Faramir goes to rant at Aragorn about how bizarre this is and is really confused when Aragorn goes into full-on flashbacks of watching those four tiny dumbasses STUFFING DEATH CAPS INTO THEIR MOUTHS LIKE GODDAMN CANDY. 

[pippinstook]

Oooooo, I like that!! And it would make sense after Boromir went on and on about how impossible it was to be able to breathe in Mordor.

[kittyknowsthings]

Hobbits can handle all the poisons. This Works excellent with the Dwarves use human poisons for Spice. If a human ate with Them at a table they’d die.

[barbarakaterina]

"I can do that with a finger snap" | Thanos & Gamora | Abu Dhabi (Mikolas Josef)

Music: Abu Dhabi (Mikolas Josef) Video: Avengers: Infinity War

[anthonybrxdgerton]

@hogwartshousesnet | march event | women of harry potter → black sisters

“Oh yeah, her mother, Andromeda, was my favorite cousin,” said Sirius, examining the tapestry carefully. “No, Andromeda’s not on here either, look —” He pointed to another small round burn mark between two names, Bellatrix and Narcissa. “Andromeda’s sisters are still here because they made lovely, respectable pure-blood marriages, but Andromeda married a Muggleborn, Ted Tonks, so —”

[stcrkly-deactivated20210125]

it’s true and they should say it.

[starkwest-deactivated20220727]

Tony is fine with being touched and handed things until after Stane’s final betrayal. Pepper hands him the papers in the garage, and he takes them. Everheart hands him photographs at the Benefit, and he takes them. Stane himself hands Tony the pizza box, and he takes it, but after this? After this, Tony won’t accept anything from someone he doesn’t know, or only knows casually and he shies away from touch unless he initiates it.

Here, Stane takes away not only the device that is keeping Tony alive but he destroys Tony’s trust. He takes something that was always fragile and wary and rips it to shreds. Tony has known him since he was a child. There are years and years of trust and faith and yes, love between them. Stane was Tony’s family, his surrogate father. He knew every single one of Tony Stark’s issues and cracks and he manipulated them perfectly. He has Tony paralyzed and unable to do anything. Tony wasn’t there to save his parents from the car crash, he couldn’t save Yinsen and now he can’t move and he can’t save Pepper.

This man who stood by Tony at his parent’s funeral with his hand on Tony’s arm, who hugged him close when he was returned from Afghanistan, who put an arm around his shoulders and pulled in him when he was telling him how they were a team now, this man has his hands all over Tony, is looking at him with more than business speculation in his eyes and there is nothing Tony can do about it. He can’t move, he can’t scream, all he can do is sit there and take it. The silence in that room, so oppressive and sharp, broken only by the crackle of the fire and the distant roll of waves, the soft press of Stane’s fingers on Tony’s cheek, the intimacy of his breath ghosting over Tony’s lips as he leaned in to pull the life from his chest, these things, like the blood and pain of the desert where strange men held him down, forcing his body to comply, these are things that Tony will never forget.

So yeah, Tony has intimacy issues. Deep seated, long standing and soul scarring issues and nothing and no-one, not Steve, not Pepper, not $300 an hour therapists who have summer homes in the Hamptons are going to completely erase that.

It is a part of him that makes him the man he is.

**

[barbarakaterina]

so, i’m sure i’m not the first to notice this but i’ve never seen it anywhere so im’s posting it anyway:

i was rewatching iron man 1 as part of preparation for endgame, and look what i noticed:

vs

just

shit.

goddamn it rogers.