what a tale we have been in @batshape - Tumblr Blog

RIP Maedhros you would’ve loved nicotine patches and xanax. RIP Maglor you would’ve loved having blue hair and pronouns. RIP Celegorm you would’ve loved cocaine and getting banned from dating apps

disabled-tolkien

Once again thinking about the “Tolkien elves are physically superior to humans in every way” thing as a disability parallel

disabled-tolkien

Tolkien really said: a group of people are born with bodies that are weaker, slower, less dexterous, more breakable. They can't do many things that others take for granted. Their bodies are vulnerable and fall to wounds and illnesses that the other group is baffled by. They are physically less able and there are barriers that they will never be able to overcome. They have no magic powers to make up for this difference; they just live with it. Their lives are shorter and they will die earlier.

Still they are heroes, lovers, craftsmen, villains, musicians, warriors, poets, adventurers. Still their existences matter. They are essential parts of the universe. Their lives are meaningful and worthy of honour, however brief they may be.

welcomingdisaster

They saw you from across the bar and they like your vibe. Do you third for 🦄 this silm couple?

Join them?

Yes

No

Voting ended onJul 30, 2024

#galadriel and melian……………….#………yes

prev-polls

Give prev a trinket

Button

Key

Bobbin

Dice

Locket

Ring

Pebble

Bottle cap

Voting ended onAug 22, 2024

moniquill

Every person who has reblogged this from me has given me a pebble. Every single one. I feel like there's some kind of message there about how people perceive me but I'm not sure what it is.

#u quilt dont u? a bobbin for u

musicofthe-ainur

Am I the only person who thought this was really fucking funny

eleemosynecdoche

A lot of the really funny moments in Lord of the Rings come from Tolkien playing with language like this, where we have relatively formal, archaic, “high” language responded to with informal, modern, “low” language.

modernclaire

another hilarious example:

lotrmusical

my absolute favorite example of tolkien switching registers in this way is

dukeofbookingham-deactivated202

Evenstar

Maglor / Maglor and Maitimo

#ooh

kanalaure

in the vein of the cybertruck poll, because it was funny: finwean most likely to own a two-seater sports car

finwe (he's retired and his kids are grown)

nolofinwe (fancy car for date nights that the kids cant get messy)

lalwen (permanently living a single girl summer, childless, having a great time)

maedhros (ironclad excuse to not have to ferry people home after family events)

caranthir (if theres no space for huan, celegorm wont ever ask for a ride*)

aredhel (live fast die young bad girls do it well)

angrod and aegnor (they share :) )

galadriel (in place of a slowpoke you would have a QUEEN--)

celebrimbor (gift from feanor that he did NOT clear w curufin)

earendil (he's the fancy vehicle guy of canon. could still be called vingilote!)

'wait where is blorbwë from my annals?'

manwe's eagles are the superior mode of transport upon this earth (see results)

Voting ended onAug 1, 2024

(*i dont know what kind of dog huan is, but he sheds. a lot. caranthir just wants to have ONE (1) space thats not covered in shed fur)

assume this is in the context of a modern au, or else that everyone is miraculously back from the dead and generally getting along fine and in the interim aman has had its industrial revolution and produced a more eco-friendly equivalent to our technologies

dont take this too seriously or get upset if your blorbo isn't represented, i filled out the ballot on a whim lmao. if you have someone you are Convinced would have one that isn't on this ballot, please do mention it in the tags

kanalaure

last call reblog

#angrod and aegnor sharing is so fucking funny i had to vote for that one

welcomingdisaster

genderswap one m/f tolkien couple to be lesbians

beren/luthien

celeborn/galadriel

earendil/elwing

idril/tuor

morwen/hurin

thingol/melian

feanor/nerdanel

finwe/miriel and finwe/indis

aegnor/andreth

turgon/elenwe

elrond/celebrian

someone else (in the tags)

Voting ended onAug 7, 2024

their kids still occur somehow 🤷🤷

#only ONE?#well theyre all lesbians in my head so jot that down etc #i mean obviously feanor nerdanel first and foremost but beren and luthien very close second #lesbian turgon and elenwe is fun i have an abandoned fic draft of that somewhere #lesbian feanel

naarisz

Tar-Ancalimë, first Ruling Queen of Númenor.

carlandrea

Tinúviel

#eyes eyes eyes #:)#luthien #beren

welcomingdisaster

an inexhaustive list of diagnoses given only to the quendi

mind-deafness: that is, inability to use osanwë

pre-traumatic stress disorder: characterized by excessive and disturbing foresight of events yet to come; dwelling on an ill future; depressive states following a resignation to fate or compulsive attempts to thwart it. if the event is survived, this sometimes, but not always, may develop into a post-traumatic stress disorder diagnosis.

partial retrograde amnesia: colloquially referred to as "forgetting," this is a state common and accepted among the edain, but highly unusual and concerning for elven-folk.

cognitive exhaustion: described as declining motivation and will to live, coupled with anhedonia and a feeling of extreme fatigue. some in the community believe this condition is equivalent to major depressive disorder, and ought to be characterized under the same diagnosis. most elves, however, prefer a separate label.

amusia: tone-deafness; difficulty processing music or beat; inability to perceive musical tone and pitch. this is rarely considered a serious medical diagnosis for edain and khazad individuals, but the significance placed on music in quendi culture means quality of life for tone-deaf individuals is severely affected. elves with severe amusia, or those who mind music unpleasant, report very poor social outcomes in quendi society.

uncahier

maedictus

Éowyn 🍂

dostoyevsky-official

when you say "get rid of the cursed amulet," i can't help but notice a tone of jealousy. envy, even

transfemfaramir

gotta say some people are always like oooo fëanor loved plain nerdanel because she was so soft and kind and patient and lovely to him and that’s what made her beautiful to him. ok well what if she wasn’t. what if she was impatient and irritable and jumped up during family dinner to go start work on a new sculpture. what if she spent days down there in her workshop covered in dust ignoring everyone. what if she wasn’t very maternal. what if she had a temper. what if she was a brilliant abrasive artist like he was. what if she wasn’t just a woman forced to mother a difficult man. what if instead their partnership was built off homophrosyne and that’s why they worked

#tradwifing nerdanel is soooooooo sinisterly boring.#there is no way she was not also insane #nerdanel #feanor