battle of the worlds

a blog dedicated to the absolute insanity that is our collaborative story       ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

[battleoftheworlds]

Tenzalo: Is this peanut free? My son has an allergy.

Store Clerk: That peanut is not free, that'll be a dollar.

Tenzalo, getting out a dollar: You're lucky I hate my son so much.

[battleoftheworlds]

Kidnapper: I have your son.

Devonne: I don't have a son??

Kidnapper: Then who just asked for a peanut butter sandwich with the crusts removed?

Devonne: Oh my gods you have Adlanniel.

[battleoftheworlds]

Reena: Hi there.

Reena: You might see me and think: "Wow, she's pretty dressed up. Is she going on a date?"

Reena: The answer is no.

Reena: I'm going to the aquarium and I need the sea otters to like me.

[battleoftheworlds]

Adlanniel: Out of all of my past boyfriends I don't have a favourite. I love them all equally.

Devonne: It's Sasem, isn't it.

Adlanniel: I can't help it. He has those beautiful "love-me-tender" eyes and I'm weak.

[battleoftheworlds]

Sasem: People often ask me how I handle Adlanniel.

Sasem: The secret is, I don't. One time he called me downstairs and shot me in the eye with a nerf gun.

[battleoftheworlds]

Adlanniel: How do you do that?

Devonne: Do what?

Adlanniel: Act like nothing bothers you?

Devonne: Step one: bottle up emotions.

Adlanniel: Okay-

Devonne: Step two: Molotov Cocktail.

[battleoftheworlds]

Reena: Good morning everyone!

Devonne: Good morning.

Sasem: Good morning.

Stephanie: Good morning.

Reena: You all sound like robots. "Good morning. Good morning." Spice it up a bit!

Adlanniel, hurtling into the room at top speeds: What's up motherfuckers?

[battleoftheworlds]

Adlanniel: *bursts into the room and slams the door shut, clearly panicked*

Kao Li: What did you do!?

Adlanniel: NOBODY DIED!

Kao Li: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?

[battleoftheworlds]

Sasem: I don't really have friends.

Reena: Those are bold words for someone withing hugging range.

[battleoftheworlds]

Rouga: If we're walking together please take into consideration my tiny legs. I can't keep up with you. Please think of my tiny legs, I don't want to be jogging to keep up with your leisurely stroll, you GIANT.

Reena: Just get a pair of roller skates and hang onto my sleeve. We don't have all day.

[battleoftheworlds]

Adlanniel: Fuck yeah I have PTSD: Pretty Talented at Sucking Dick.

Devonne: Please go to therapy.

[battleoftheworlds]

God: I regret creating you.

Adlanniel: Then get rid of me, pussy.

[battleoftheworlds]

Adlanniel: You'll see my name on billboards.

Devonne: Yeah, wanted: dead or alive.

[battleoftheworlds]

"I want small children to think I am either a goddess or a faerie but I want grown men to fear me."

-Devonne

[battleoftheworlds]

"Just trying to do my bestpacito here."

- Adlanniel

[battleoftheworlds]

Adlanniel, seeing a healthy relationship between a person and their father: What the fuck? What the fuck is this? What the fuck?

[battleoftheworlds]

Eidya: I may be short but that doesn't mean you're not about to experience the wrath of a god.