* 𝒃𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒂

𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐑       /       as       cherished       by       liz.

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vale-x​:

closed starter to @bcllet​ location: greer’s apartment time: midnight

A small cough cleared his throat as Lukas closed the front door behind him, attentive to make the thud as soft as possible. His footsteps were difficult to treat with the same quietness, and they thudded heavily on the hardwood on his navigation to find Greer. Muscles ached with the fatigue of the day, and Lukas stopped momentarily to drop his keys on the kitchen counter, have a glass of water in the dark and reflect on the shift’s events in silence. Though exhausted, he felt an air of excitement about how much success the company was accruing, and carried that excitement with him into Greer’s bedroom, where he first just gazed over at his slumbering girlfriend. For a long moment, Lukas just watched her, smiling dumbly because he was just happy she was there and existed. Then he quietly dressed down to his boxers, and tried to slip into bed beside her without disturbing her. A sigh lifted through him, and he leaned over to carefully press a kiss into her forehead and brush away some stray hair from her face. “Baby?” he whispered, slowly snuggling up closer. Lips found her cheek, arm wound around her waist to tug her into spooning. “Baby, you awake?” he asked, as if he didn’t already have his answer. He missed her, and normally he might have been pushy and woken her up to spend some time with him, but that tempo’d voice in his head reminded him to think about her. She needed her sleep. She’d likely spent all day dancing and was exhausted. He had to be content with being patient and though it frustrated him, he decided he prioritized her rest in this moment. 

Lukas scooted a bit closer, pulled her back into his chest a bit tighter, and sighed again before closing his eyes and settling in to sleep. But not before speaking to her. Even if she didn’t hear him, he wanted to remind her every moment he could. “I love you.” It was mumbled into her hair with a small, tired smile.

        ever  since she  had  dropped  everything  for  lukas  and  had  been  following him  to  san  francisco,  greer  couldn't  really  even  put  it  into words  how  happy  she  had  been.  and  she  still  couldn't  properly  realize  that  they  were  officially  a  pair.  that  they were  together.  that  he  belonged  to  her,  just  as  much  as she  belonged  to  him.  and  after  everything  that  had  happened over  the  past  few  weeks,  it  felt  like  they  had  finally their  happiness  from  the  cruise  back.  one  she  had  missed  so unbelievably  much.

        greer's  days  were  currently  long  and  exhausting.  practice got  the  best  of  her,  especially  because  it  still  hurt  to see  kal  and  not  being  able  to  talk  to  him  like  she  wished she  could.  she  missed  him,  as  her  best  friend,  but  she'd  never  admit  that  in  front  of  lukas.  she  couldn't.  there  was  no  energy  left  in  her  to  fight  anymore,  and  she  didn't  even  want  to  think  about  it.  he  was  too  important  for  her, and  she  didn't  want  to  risk  it.  so,  instead,  she  sucked it  up  but  it  unfortunately  only  drained  even  more  energy out  of  her.  so  it  was  no  surprise  that  she  quickly  had  slipped  into  bed  when  she  got  home  and  barely  heard  it  that  her  boyfriend  had  entered  her  apartment  after  a  few  hours  of  sleep.  it  hadn’t  taken  long  for  her  to  give  him  her  spare  key  as  she  trusted him  with  it  blindly  and  she  wasn't  hiding  from  him anything.

        only  when  the  woman  slowly  felt  the  warmth  increasing  under  the  blanket,  which  could  only  mean  he  had  joined  her and  she  heard  the  whisper  of  his  words,  her  eyelids  slowly flattered  open  and  she  couldn't  even  try  to  hide  the  soft smirk  that  was  tugging  at  the  corner  of  her  lips.  she'd  never  get  tired  of  hearing  him  confess  his  love  to  her. never.  ❝   and  i  love  you.  ❞   she  finally  whispered  back  and  turned  around  in  his  grasp,  now  properly  facing him.  carefully,  she  lifted  one  hand  up,  fingertips  brushing over  his  cheek.  ❝   i  didn't  know  you'd  be  coming  over today.  did  you  even  have  dinner  at  work ?  ❞   she  was, obviously,  slightly  worried,  knowing  he  had  a  long  work  day. and  if  she  would  have  known  in  advance,  greer  wouldn't have  eaten  everything  from  her  own  dinner,  making  sure  he'd get  some  leftovers.  ❝   i  can  also  make  you  something right  now.  ❞  her  brown  eyes  fell  onto  the  clock  on the  nightstand  behind  him,  and  she  chuckled  lightly  as  she realized  what  time  it  was.  not  that  it'd  stop  her  though.

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abigailwilson​:

@enycstarters​ open to anyone ♥

she’s pretty sure dante will kill her if she’s late again. she’s never fond of being on the receiving end of his temper, so she’s sprinting as fast as she can to get to training on time. it’s just this one next turn and then — TH UD ! next thing she knows her ass is on the ground, a groan leaving her lips as she rubs at it. “ fuck. watch where you’re going maybe ? ” she suggests in complaint to the person she ran into since it obviously wasn’t her fault.

        ❝  i  should  watch  where  i’m  going  ?   ❞  greer  scoffed slightly,  arms  crossed  over  her  chest.  at  first,  she  wanted to  help  the  other  woman  up,  but  not  after  getting  such  rude  remark  back  instead.  the  ballerina  usually  always  was understanding  when  someone  was  in  a  hurry,  but  not  when  it meant  to  hurt  others.  and  greer  had  done  nothing  but  walk  carefully  home  after  practice.  in  her  eyes,  this  wasn’t  her  fault.  not  that  she  wanted  to  blame  anyone,  but  she  just  wouldn’t  let  herself  talk  to  that  way.  ❝  i  wasn’t the  one  running,  was  i  ?  ❞  she  simply  asked,  the annoyance  clearly  audible  but  finally  she  offered  her  hand   towards  the  girl  on  the  ground.

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lennonduffy​:

Part of growing meant leaving things in your past. For someone like Lennon, that meant tripping and burning bridges without meaning to. They told kids not to play with fire, but in her quest for greatness, that was all she ever did. It wasn’t with any malicious intent, no, there were still the after effects. The ripples. The shocks left behind. And sometimes, that meant leaving a friendship in the dust. She felt bad about it, but not bad enough to repair it. Certainly not bad enough to risk fame for someone else’s feelings. Greer was one of those. They’d begun thick as thieves, then personalities crashed and the friendship was nothing but a memory. Lennon missed it some days, most days she was glad that they were far enough to avoid constant flare ups. Until now. When she was sitting on the Metro, literally staring at the other across the way, giving an awkward wave.

closed @bcllet​

        greer  didn't  hate lennon  ―   in  fact,  there  always  would  be  a  part  that cared  deeply  about  her  old  friend.  and  knowing  greer,  she'd still  instantly  be  there  in  an  emergency.  but  she  wouldn't  show  that  side  of  her  anymore,  not  unless  she  had  to. after  they  had  parted  ways  because  lennon  chose  her  way  to fame  over  a  friend,  greer  never  could  look  at  the  woman the  same.  she  simply  didn't  understand  how  one  could  rather   drop  a  friendship,  but  it  also  shouldn't  surprise  her, living in  a  big  city  like  new  york  where  nearly  everyone  tried to  make  a  name  for  themselves.

rather  unfortunately,  their  ways  had  found  each  other  again  on the  metro  when  greer  was  on  her  way  home  from  practice. and  she  didn't  want  to  be  completely  rude,  and  honestly, was  even  a  little  bit  curious  what  she  had  missed  in lennon's  life.  awkwardly,  she  stood  up,  quickly  taking  the free  seat  next  to  her.  ❝   hey...  ❞   it  nearly  a whisper,  with  a  lump  stuck  in  her  throat  she  quickly  tried to  cough  away.  ❝   haven't  seen  you  in  a  long  time.  how  have  you  been  ?   ❞

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ath-ryu​:

IN ALL HONESTY, ATHENA HAD been worried about greer long before the events of the party. their work ethic tended to mirror each other: constantly just moving onto the next thing and putting everything they had into their obligations. today, especially, there was no denying the fact that the ballerina was clearly drained. she should be resting athena couldn’t help but think to herself as close as the deadline was. you performed how you practiced and greer clearly wasn’t entirely there. 

“you don’t need to apologize.. i’m just worried.” she chewed on her bottom lip as she finished, clearly nervous to bring up the incident. she wanted the studio to be a safe space for the dancers that she worked with and the younger woman was clearly uncomfortable. if she was going to continue to be productive, they needed to put her feelings out in the open. keep her focused on the performance. “you’re usually a bit more.. here. not that having something on your mind is something bad.” she paused. “remember, sweetheart.. your feelings matter too.”

i mean, you have seen him. the statement caused a reactionary noise to come from her. it was true, the bruises and the other visible injuries were quite hard for her to miss. yes, he did say something to her. “he.. may have brought it up.” she let out a sigh, running her fingers along the keys but not allowing the sound to play out in the room. “i care about you both. i just don’t want either of you to feel.. ganged up on.” the last part of the statement came out as a strangled sigh. it hurt, seeing two people that she cared about at odds with each other. usually, watching them together made one thing pretty obvious: they made each other better. athena felt the same way about having both of them in her life: she learned something new through a lot of her clients, but the two of them were different. “i just don’t want to see the two of you in pain.”

        athena  was  too  good  for  greer.  she  always  had  been.  greer  always  knew  she  could count  on  her,  which  is  why  she  so  deeply  cherished  her. and  the  last  thing  the  ballerina  ever  wanted  to  do  was  to  worry  her.  a  sigh  slipped  from  her  tongue  as  she  listened to  her  words  carefully,  and  she  just  frustratingly  sat  down  next  to  the  piano.  she  couldn't  properly  dance  right  now anyway.

        your  feelings  matter  too.  didn't  everything  happen  because of  that  in  the  first  place ?  because  of  her  feelings  ?  and  of  course...  also kal's,  to  an  extent.  feelings  from  both  sides  she  didn't  dare  to  explore  further.  greer  simply  couldn't.  ❝   i'm glad  he  talked  to  you  about  it.  seriously.  ❞   and  she meant  it.  usually  greer  always  tried  to  be  there  for  him, to  always  have  an  open  ear  for  her  dance  partner,  but obviously  this  wasn't  anything  but  easy  at  the  moment.  ❝  i-i  didn't  mean  for  this  to  happen,  you  know  ?  ❞    greer shrugged  with  her  shoulders,  staring  at  the  ground  as  she couldn't  face  athena  the  proper  way.  she  feared  that  if  anyone  saw  her  true  emotions,  she  would  completely  fall apart.

        ❝  the  worst  thing  is  that  so  many  people  act  like it's  my  fault.  ❞   she  sighed  again,  the  frustration  clearly  audible.  ❝   i  feel  like  even  kal  does  to  a point...  ❞   and  she  didn't  really  blame  him  for  it. greer  and  him  always  had  this  chemistry  where  it  seemed like  it  could  be  more.  she  couldn't  even  deny  that  herself.  but  that  didn't  excuse  their  kiss.  ❝   and  the  last thing  i  wanted  was  for  him  to  get  beat  up.  i  wasn't  even there.  i  feel  like...  i  feel  like  if  i  would  have  been there,  he  wouldn't  look  like  this  now.  ❞   and  there  it was.  the  little  part  she  tried  to  hid  from  herself  : everyone  blamed  her,  but  so  did  she  herself.

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alexjvng​:

with all the mess recently going on around him (something that seemed to follow him no matter where he went to: sometimes he really sat and wondered if he was actually the bad luck charm), a breather was always appreciated. as much as he loved the peace and quiet of his own room: sometimes it could get boring. and well, admiring the new york city landscape was something that still captivated his attention, even if it was just a regular street. this city was loud, vibrant and full of life, and there was always something to keep your eye on. it was still a bit surreal to think he was now living here, with an actual job and making friends for the first time in his life. 

getting lost in his private smoking session outside his own door: alex was only taken back to reality when a very familiar voice spoke to him, since he wasn’t expecting anyone today. let alone her. the smoke he let out around them was on purpose. he was always playful around her, knowing it caused a reaction. though right now, such teasing dynamic felt too prohibited… even incredibly wrong. but a small smirk creeped on his lips anyways. “greer…”, he let out with the same energy. “you’ve seen me… you were just pretending that you didn’t”, he commented before taking another drag of his joint in an attempt to appear a bit uninterested over the fact. 

“aw, are you worried i might get sick?”, he teased, unable to help it, though he probably should really not be doing that right now. he cleared his throat. “ha ha, very funny. actually, this might be one of the very few places i am genuinely welcomed at”, he scoffed a little. he wasn’t being hostile towards her, it was just his regular self deprecating humor: but he was probably oversharing by now. he decided to change the subject instead. “don’t you… think it’s a little too soon to be showing up here? we are all still dealing with the aftermath of it all around this place”, he pointed out, it wasn’t a lie. this could potentially only lead to more chaos since everything was still so fresh. but he hoped she wouldn’t take it the wrong way, it was just a genuine concern he was having right now.

        greer  scoffed  at  his  comment  and  couldn’t  help  it  but to  roll  her  light  brown  eyes  annoyingly.  he  always  managed to  get  under  her  skin  and  she  could  curse  him  for  that. again  and  again  and  again.  how  dare  he  say  she  had  just pretended  she  didn’t  see  him.  the  ballerina  would  never  do such  thing.  (  she  totally  would,  especially  with  him.  ) 

        ❝  just  shut  up.  ❞  she  puffed  out  some  air  into  the cold  night,  arms  crossed  over  her  chest.  greer  desperately  tried  not  to  inhale  too  much  of  the  smoke,  the  smell  alone making  her  slightly nauseous.  instead,  she  hummed  at  his question,  glaring  only  more  at  him.   ❝  sure  i  am worried  that  a  friend  of  kal’s  might  get  sick.  it’s called  human  decency.  ❞  she  purposefully  phrased  it  like that,  as  if  she  only  knew  him  through  his  roommate.  not because  of  their  actual  first  encounter.  one  she  desperately tried  not  to  think  about,  ever  again,  but  whenever  he  was around  she  frustratingly  still  did. 

        however,  his  next  question  completely  took  her  by  the surprise,  and  it  was  quite  visible  that  she  suddenly  felt overwhelmed,  not  knowing  what  to  properly  say.  of  course greer  it  wasn’t  right  to  come  here.  but  could  he  really   judge  her  for  it  ?   ❝  you  make  it  sound  like  i  beat him  up.  as  if  it’s  my  fault,  when  it  was  nothing  but toxic  masculinity.   ❞  greer  tensed  up,  jaw  slightly clenched.  even  though  she  always  drifted  away  with  her thoughts  when  she  was  around  alex,  the  reality  always  caught up  on  her.   ❝  and  i  do  like  to  believe  i  am allowed  to  check  up  on  a  friend.   ❞

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𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐑   ―    @alexjvng​

        greer didn’t  know  what  she  was  thinking  as  her  feet  approached the  apartment  kal  and  his  roommates  were  living  in  further and  further.  she  was  supposed  to  stay  away  from  it,  from   him   ―   and  still,  a  part  of  her  just  needed  to know  how  he  was  holding  up.  if  he  was  healing  properly. sure,  she  could  easily  have  done  so  at  practice,  but  around so  many  people,  they  currently  just  didn’t  act  the  same anymore.

        the  woman  was  already  making  up  in  her  mind  what  to  say  to  him,  when  a  familiar  figure  in  front  of the  apartment  caught  her  attention  instead.  and  immediately, this  strange  feeling  she  always  tried  to  ignore  ignited inside  of  her  again.  not  again.

        ❝  alex.  ❞  she  bluntly  stated  as  she  approached  him  a  little  more,  eyes  falling  onto  the  smoke around  him.  greer  coughed  a  little  at  the  smell  and scrunched  her  nose,  quickly  taking  a  few  steps  back  again. the  ballerina  always  stayed  away  from  anything  that  could possibly  damage  her  from  the  inside  (  besides  alcohol  ).  as  a  professional  athlete,  looking  out  for  your  body  was top  priority.

        ❝  long  time  no  see.  ❞  and  she  really couldn’t  remember  the  last  time  she  had  seen  him.  probably  because  she  always  tried  to  forget  about  him  as  quickly  as he  appeared  in  her  mind  ―  which  is  why  she  couldn’t even  explain  why  she  was  talking  to  him  right  now.  god, how  she  hated  this  strange  effect  he  had  on  her.  ❝  isn’t it  a  little  cold  to  sit  alone  outside  of  your  apartment   ?  nearly  looks  like  you  aren’t  welcome  in  your  own place.  ❞

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𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐑   ―    @giovannivitale​

        greer really  wasn’t  in  the  right  state  of  mind  currently.  with   everything  that  was  going  on  after  the  halloween  party,  she barely  could  focus  on  anything  that  was  happening  right  in front  of  her  face.  million  of  thoughts  were  constantly rushing  through  her  mind.  so,  it  wasn’t  really  a  surprise that  she  suddenly  bumped  into  someone  on  her  way  to  ballet   practice,  causing  her  to  stumble  back.   ❝  watch  it, you   ―   ❞  she  was  about  to  curse  at  the person,  a  rather  rare  sight  for  the  petite  ballerina  that usually  was  always  kind  to  all  kind  of  strangers.  but currently,  just  the  smallest  thing  could  set  her  off. 

         however,  the  second  her  light  brown  eyes  fell  onto  the  quite  familiar  person,  lips  parted  in  surprise  and  she couldn’t  believe  that  out  of  the  million  strangers  of  new york,  she  had  bumped  into  gino.   ❝  oh.   ❞ greer  just  managed  to  whisper,  not  really  knowing  what  to say  since  the  last  time  she  had  seen  him  was...    ― well,  when  she  nearly  desperately  tried  to  search  for tinder  dates  and  he  seemed  to  be  the  one  person  she  could have  expected  more  with.  until  she  just  started  to  ghost him  out  of  sheer  panic  and  commitment  issues  again.   ❝ i-i’m  sorry...   ❞  maybe  he  wouldn’t  even  recognize her.  not  that  she  changed  much  since  their  last  meeting, but  maybe  he  had  just  forgotten  about  her.  at  least  she hoped  so.  

[bcllet-archive]

murdrhewrote​:

.

“I don’t see it as a disaster."   He says simply, once again providing no more insight than that. All in all, he had actually quite enjoyed the turn of events.  "And I certainly don’t see it as my fault that your boyfriends went at each other like rabid dogs."  Cue to a waggle of his eyebrows, followed by another handful of nuts coming into his mouth. Her confession doesn’t surprise him. After finding out about their dalliance, very little did. Rico merely shrugs, talking without looking at her, as if he was musing aloud.  "That’s not what I judge you for. Lucifer’s an asshole. I’m an asshole. We don’t pretend not to be."  Now his gaze is fully on her, piercing and unyielding.  "You do. You’re gonna wanna fix him, and when you’re unable to, this is gonna burst up in flames. Neither of you deserve that."  He looks back at the ladies gathering in the distance, blows a kiss to Babette which she catches with one hand.  "I’d hate to see what kind of damage the two of you could do to each other.”

        not a  disaster  ?  greer  scoffed,  shaking  her  head  in  disbelief. if  that  halloween  party  wasn’t  a  disaster  to  him,  she  really  worried  what  he  defined  as  a  disaster.   and greer  nearly  wanted  to  counter  against  rico,  again    ―  when his  words  suddenly  completely  took  her  by  surprise.  all  the time,  the  ballerina  felt  like  he  simply  was  judging  her. but  right  now,  it  sounded  an  awful  lot  like  he  cared.  she softened  a  little,  her  body  not  as  tense  as  before  anymore as  she  leaned  back  into  her  seat.  she  didn’t  even  look at  the  other  ladies,  especially  since  she’d  only  earn  a glare  from  babette  anyway.   ❝   i’m  not pretending  he  isn’t  an  asshole.  i  know  he  is  one,  and  he fucked  at  the  party.  big  time.  ❞  and  yet,  she  knew herself  that  wouldn’t  stop  her  from  seeing  him.  she couldn’t  even  explain  it  herself   ―  and  her  head  didn’t  like  it,  at  all.  but  she  couldn’t  really  control  her  heart.   ❝  and  he  did  hurt  me...   ❞  a  sigh slipped  from  her  lips.   ❝  but  i  don’t  really  want to  give  up  on  him.  anyway,  since  when  did  book  club  turn into  a  therapy  session  for  me  ?   ❞

[bcllet-archive]

ath-ryu​:

@bcllet​

ATHENA HAD ALWAYS THOUGHT GREER was a sweet girl. while she was extremely protective over kal, she felt safer knowing that he had a partner who seemed to support him and care about him. she respected her and her dedication to her work, a way in which the two were quite alike. it felt like athena had truly been bent over the piano for nearly thirty years, after all. 

todays rehearsal was a solo one, athena having already seen kal and now taking the time to go over some of greer’s solos. the moment kal had walked into the room earlier, it was clear that something was going on. the moment that greer entered, the same energy was put out into the open studio. 

“greer, hey.” the older woman flashed her a weak smile, hoping it would cheer her up. kal and greer seemed quite good for each other and the last thing athena wanted was to see something happen to them. “you ready to go?” while she had tried to ignore the elephant in the room, after a couple moments of silence went by it became a bit harder to ignore. 

“greer..” she murmured, stepping out from behind the instrument and making her way over. “has something happened.. i cant lie.. i noticed both you and kal don’t really seem like yourselves.” rico had already sort of told her what happened, but she had been waiting to hear it from the lips of those involved. 

        greer  really  wasn't  feeling  well  enough  to  practice  today. and  yet,  here  she  was  ―   never  giving  up  on  it.  everyone knew  she  was  a  perfectionist  that  didn't  stop  working  until every  move  was  perfect  and  that  she  sometimes  would  stay  at the  studio  till  the  late  evening.  but  today,  she  didn't even  have  the  strength  to  go  through  the  basics  even.  and especially  not  after  having  a  dispute  with  kal  before  practice,  which  only  had  drained  even  more  energy.  all  she wanted  to  do  was  to  simply  lay  in  bed.

        greer,  hey.  the  familiar  voice  managed  to  snap  greer  out of  her  thoughts,  and  she  turned  around  to  athena,  trying her  hardest  to  flash  the  older  woman  a  little  smile.  greer felt  bad  for  keeping  her  hanging  today,  for  not  performing at  her  best  and  taking  up  her  time.  ❝   sorry.  " she  mumbled  weakly,  stepping  closer  towards  the  piano  again, just  wanting  to  continuing  practicing.

        but  athena  seemed  to  have  other  plans,  and  a  sigh  rolled from  her  tongue  once  she  mentioned  what  she  had  tried  so desperately  to  avoid.  she  didn't  want  anyone  else  to  see  how  tense it  currently  was  between  kal  and  her,  but  fooling  athena was  nearly  impossible.  she  knew  greer  and  kal  just  simply too  well.  she  awkwardly  looked  down  at  the  ground, scratching  the  back  of  her  neck.  ❝   i  mean,  you  have seen  him...  ❞   kal  had  private  practice  before  her,  so she  was  sure  that  athena  would  have  noticed  the  cuts  and bruises  on  his  face.  ❝  i  guess  i'm  kind  of  responsible  for  that  and  i  just...  ❞   another  sigh.  ❝   did  he say  anything  to  you  ?  ❞   greer  felt  immensely  worse with  every  second  that  passed,  knowing  damn  well  if  she talked  to  athena,  she  wouldn't  be  able  to  dance  at  all today  anymore

[bcllet-archive]

𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐑 / as cherished by liz.

[bcllet-archive]

hyxnjxn​:

Now look, you made her sad. And all at once the fight seemed to slip away from him, his anger dissipating and leaving only a harsh ache in its place.  The traitorous voice in the back of his head nagged at him, made his heart clench painfully for the unshed tears that had caused her eyes to go glassy and hallow. He had never, ever wanted to be someone who hurt her but now it seemed that was all he could do. Simply existing around both him and Lucifer and the same time was tearing her apart, he could see that, but selfishly, hopelessly, he wished that their friendship was more important to her than it was.

Maybe he had been deluded this entire time, his own repressed feelings for her making him see things that weren’t there, but he had felt it that night and he had felt it again on Halloween. The thought made him scoff dejectedly at himself, that had probably also been in his head. He had ruined his life for nothing.

He glanced up, the way she, herself, couldn’t look anywhere but her shoes tugging at him incessantly. Maybe not for nothing.

“You’re right,” he agreed, defeated, “I don’t understand, Greer. Help me understand.” He folded his arms over his chest, his brow furrowing in concern before he rolled his eyes. “Oh wow, what a saint he is.” Praised for the bare minimum.

‘Sure, he murdered six people, officer, but he owned up to it and that has to count for something!’

There was a part of him that felt that wasn’t actually too far off, scary enough.

He opened his mouth, ready to dismiss her before he stopped himself. He wouldn’t let his anger get the better of him, not with Greer, even if she did make it nearly impossible to hold his tongue. “I-yes, Greer of course I can, I’ve been worried about how this is effecting you all weekend, that’s part of the fucking problem!” He all but yelled, uncaring, for once, of the hundred or so people in the building.  “The question is, can he?” Kal gave a final, dark chuckle before his back hit the wall and he let out a hiss of pain.

“I’m sorry that you regret it so much.” He spat, his jaw clenching as he looked away from her, off into the distance with a thousand-yard stare. He felt foolish, just like he had told her before the kiss. Maybe that’s all he was, a court jester for her entertainment. It certainly felt that way.

“No, I don’t suppose we really had time to get well acquainted.” He grumbled, unable to deny himself another jab at the man’s expense. “I tried with him, you know. All I did was introduce myself after he ran into me. You don’t find that concerning at all? What happens when he decides that one of our instructors is getting a little too close? He’s just going to commit assault every time he doesn’t get his way?”

He shook his head in disbelief, his hands waxing in front of him as he laughed. “That is not even remotely comparable, Greer. The last time I checked Rylan has never done anything even close to what Lucifer has done. Threatening to tell the board about of sex life so that I get fired, Greer, are you fucking hearing yourself right now? She’s made some mean comments, not blackmailed and assaulted you. She’s depressed, not a raging fucking lunatic!”

He turned away, his hands clenching as he stretched his stiff neck. This was getting far too heated. He never wanted to fight with her in the first place.

“He made you what?” He turned, his moth dropping open as he searched her eyes for assurance, anything that would tell him that she hadn’t agreed to whatever demand he had made. “What does that even mean, Greer?”

        ❝   i  don't  ―  ❞   a  sigh  slipped  through  her  lips, but  she  couldn't  finish  the  sentence.  i  don't  regret  it, she  at  least  managed  to  finish  in  her  mind.  greer  didn't regret  kissing  him.  at  least  not  in  that  way.  she  only regretted  that  it  only  happened  now.  that  this  pent  up frustration  between  them  only  came  back  to  the  light  when  she  was  close  to  a  relationship.  they  should  have  just  talked  so  much  earlier  about  what  happened  between  them.  now it  was  too  late.

        her  gaze  fell  back  onto  him  and  honestly,  she  had  given up  by  now  to  hold  her  emotions  back.  whether  it  was  the tears  or  the  anger.  greer  tried  to  study  him,  tried  to understand  why  he  just  seemed  to  care  so  much.  why  he  wouldn't  just  give  up  on  her.  ❝   do  you  ?  ❞   it slipped  uncontrollably  out  of  her,  curiosity  all  over  her face.  she  wanted  to  know  if  he  did  regret  it.  he  was  the  one who  was  in  a  relationship.  not  her.  ❝   and...  and  does rylan  know,  by  the  way  ?  ❞   greer  didn't  really  want  to talk  about  her.  she  just  couldn't  stand  the  other  woman, but  she  tried,  for  his  sake.  she  really  fucking  did  and now  she  was  the  problem  rylan  probably  always  seemed  so afraid  of.  and  greer  couldn't  even  blame  her  for  it.

        ❝   i  ―  ❞  greer  was  just  at  a  loss  of  words  by now.  kal  called  her  out  so  much,  and  he  was  right,  about  everything.  about  everything  he  said  abou t lucifer  ―   and  she  knew  it,  she  just  didn't  want  to  believe it.  ❝   have  you  never  loved  someone  so  much  ?  loved  them despite  their  flaws  ?  ❞   her  voice  was  weak  and  she just  felt  how  her  cheeks  were  wet  from  the  tears  that  were flooding  down.  quickly,  she  tried  to  wipe  some  away  with the  hem  of  her  shirt,  trying  to  prevent  herself  from looking  worse.  ❝   and  i  know  it's  not  the  same  !  ❞   her  voice  got  a  little  louder  again.  ❝   but  you  cling to  someone  who  hurt  you,  too.  while  you  preach  about  how you  love  her,  and  yet...  you  and  i  ― ...  ❞   she  snorted, frustratingly  running  her  hands  through  her  hair  by  now, leaving  them  in  a  disheveled  mess.  she  felt  like  kicking  something  out  of  frustration  right  now.  ❝   and  yet  you'd do  everything  for  her...  ❞   and  maybe  a  part  of  her wished  that  she  was  in  the  same  spot.

        and  she  couldn't  even  blame  him  for  the  shocking  look that  appeared  on  his  face  when  she  had  spilled  the  truth. she  didn't  even  want  to  imagine  what  she'd  feel  like  if rylan  had  told  him  to  stop  being  friends  with  greer.  ❝  he  told  me  to  choose...  and  i-i...  i  love  him,  kal...  ❞  her  voice  broke  and  she  had  to  lean  against  a  wall, trying  to  keep  herself  steady.  ❝   i  told  him  it'd  be   only  be  work  between  us  from  now  on.  ❞   she  hated admitting  the  truth.  she  absolutely  hated  it.  especially because  she  knew  she  couldn't  keep  her  word  to  lucifer.  not  with  kal.  not  with  the  friend  who  always  sticked  by  her side.  not  with  the  person  who'd  always  catch  her.  ❝   but  i  don't  know  how  to  stay  away  from  you  even  just  in a  friendship  way...   ❞

[akanesource]

adelaide kane photographed by luc coiffait

[lady-arryn]

The Royal Ballet’s production of Swan Lake  *•♫♪

[bcllet-archive]

@hyxnjxn

[adelaidedaily]

Adelaide Kane photographed by Jordan Harvey

[bcllet-archive]

murdrhewrote​:

closed starter: @bcllet​ 

location: book club meeting. 

“I don’t think much of you."  The statement is an odd one. Made during the break of the club’s typical discussion, brought about just as soon as the woman’s face turned his way. It feels unfinished. Like there is more to come, like he will keep on talking. 

But there’s nothing.  Instead, he fishes out nuts from the bowl and pops one into his mouth. 

        greer gritted  her  teeth  together,  pretending  she  wasn’t  too  hurt by  his  statement.  she  really  didn’t  need  him  to  lash  out against  her  currently  as  well.  she  had  enough  of  it.  ❝  i  am  not  sure  you  are  one  to  talk,  this  entire evening  was  only  a  disaster  because  you  thought  it’d  be  a great  pr  stunt  to  pretend  that  someone  got  murdered.  ❞ sure,  he  couldn’t  have  known  that  an  actual  murder  would happen  afterwards,  but  still.  maybe  the  evening  would  have turned  out  completely  different  for  her.   ❝  and  you don’t  get  to  judge  me  for  who  i  lo   ―   ❞ she  quickly  stopped  herself,  just  hoping  that  no  one  else from  the  book  club  was  eavesdropping  on  their  conversation.  ❝  i  mean,  aren’t  you...  somewhat  a  friend  of  his  ?  shouldn’t  you  be  supportive  ?   ❞

[bcllet-archive]

hyxnjxn​:

“Well he seems pretty dammed convinced that you’re his girlfriend so you might want to clear that up.” He said, his tone biting. 

His eyes lit up at her words, skyrocketing past anger and straight into completely incomprehensible rage. “Are you kidding me?” He asked, bordering on hysterical for the first time since they had met nearly ten years ago. “Are you out of your fucking mind?” He laughed, his hands tugging on his hair as he gritted his teeth, grinding them together with a sickening slide.

 "Let me get this straight, he commits a felony, one which I, by the way, was gracious enough not to press charges on so that your life could be a bit easier because he would, inevitably, somehow blame you for his entire career crumbling while he spends three years in the goddamn penitentiary and you’re lecturing me?“ His chest heaved, his hands shaking with a manic energy. "You didn’t even bother to call and see if I was okay, which was awesome, by the way. Felt real fucking good.” He spat, his nostrils flaring as he tried to reel in his temper. It wasn’t her fault, she hadn’t done anything wrong. But defending Lucifer? Everything he had done had been completely out of line. He had extended an olive branch, with no other reasoning beside making her happy, and this was the thanks he got? 

“You’re delusional,” But still, he was undeniably hurt, “That’s all I can come up with. Maybe he really did sell his soul to a demon because this is absolute insanity. I can’t believe you’re holding me as responsible for this as him!” He huffed, his hand pressing at his forehead, amazed at this turn.   

“Maybe I thought he would stop being such a fucking dick all the time.” He spat back, “o-or that he’d kick me out of the party, or that he’d stop threatening my career, maybe? Never once did I think you could ever be in love with a man who was so controlling and insecure and violent and unstable and childish that he couldn’t think of any other way to handle his emotions other than beating the shit out of me in public. Maybe I’m the idiot for not realizing that I’m just supposed to punch my way through life.” His breath came harshly, his chest expanding past what was comfortable as he wheezed. 

“It doesn’t matter?” He scoffed. “It matters so much. Greer, I understand you love him for whatever reason but Jesus Christ this isn’t one red flag it’s the entire flag store!" 

"Why do you feel the need to apologize for him?” He asked, disgusted at the notion. “You didn’t do this, you didn’t do any of this.” Then, the realization. “Greer, No. Don’t tell me- you still want to be with him?” He laughed, deep and broken. Of course. His own life was in shambles and Lucifer walked away with everything he wanted. Life was a joke. “Holy shit, my life is a nightmare.”

        she  flinched,  eyes  widened  in  shock  as  he  started  to lash  out  at  her.  in  ten  years,  working  side  by  side  with him,  sometimes  being  more  together  with  him  than  actual partners  or  even  with  her  family    ―  and  greer had  never  seen  him  like  this. 

        she  took  a  deep  breath  as  she  tried  to  stay  as  calm  as possible,  not  to  break  out  into  tears  right  here,  right now.  she  couldn’t  cry.  she  couldn’t  show  weakness, especially  not  at  her  work  place.  if  people  would  notice  her  red  eyes  later,  they  would  immediately  add  one  and  one   together.  and  greer  couldn’t  let  this  happen.  she  didn’t want  to  put  kal  in  the  bad  light,  but  also  not  risk  anything  for  herself.  instead,  she  clenched  her  hand  into  a fist,  trying  to  stop  them  from  shaking  as  she  just  focused on  his  voice  instead.  usually,  focusing  on  him  always  calmed her  down.  during  a  performance,  he  was  all  that  mattered to  her.  he’d  always  catch  her.  but  right  now,  she  wasn’t so  sure  of  that  anymore.  and  she  absolutely  blamed  herself for  it   ―   and  it  wasn’t  about  to  get  any better. 

        ❝  you  just  don’t  fucking  understand,  kal.  ❞  she wasn’t  able  to  look  at  him,  and  instead  looked  down  at the  ground,  focusing  on  her  ballet  shoes  she  was  already wearing.  if  she’d  look  at  him,  she  couldn’t  hold  back the  tears  anymore.  greer  just  knew  it.   ❝  i  don’t hold  you  as  responsible  as  him,  actually.  he  even  admitted he  started  the  fight  and  trust  me,  talking  to  him  wasn’t any  pleasant  either.  he  hurt  me.  he  hurt  me  by  hurting  you.  and  i  know  he  knows..  and  i’m  sorry  for  not calling.  i  know  i  should  have,  but,  uh   ―   let’s just  say  i’m  surprised  i  managed  myself  to  come  to practice  today.  i  mean,  can’t  you  imagine  a  little  bit how  i  feel  too  ?  i  know  it  doesn’t  excuse  it  but... yeah.  ❞

        greer  didn’t  even  want  to  think  back,  didn’t  want  to think  the  heavy  words  lukas  and  her  exchanged  as  well.  a part  of  her  was  just  glad  that  lucifer  didn’t  know  how exactly  the  kiss  happened,  what  led  to  it.  that  he  didn’t  know  how  deep  her  past  with  kal  was  running.  how  close they  once  were...and  never  dared  to  be  again  until  the halloween  night.  if  he’d  know,  she  didn’t  even  want  to imagine  what  kal  would  look  like  now.  he  probably  wouldn’t even  be  standing  here  and  indeed  had  to  rest  (  like  he was  already  supposed  to  ).

        ❝  i  am  not  saying  sorry  for  him  ❞,  she  admitted, and  still  couldn’t  look  at  him  while  her  heart  was heavily  pounding  against  her  chest.  greer  felt  like  she  was about  to  throw  up.  fighting  with  kal  was  something  she’d never  imagined  to  be  so  intense.  ❝  i  am  saying...  sorry for  whatever  happened  between  us  there.  because  that  was what  got  you  into  that  mess.  ❞  sure,  maybe  lucifer  had thrown  the  punch.  maybe  he  went  too  far.  but  it’d  have never  happened  if  the  iconic  ballet  duo  just  didn’t exchange  a  kiss.  a  kiss  she  didn’t  want  to  think  about, about  what  it  actually  meant.

        ❝  y-you  don’t  know  him  like  i  do...  he’s  not  the monster  everyone  makes  him  out  to  be.   ❞  at  the moment,  greer  didn’t  know  if  she  was  actually  telling  kal  this   ―   or  rather  herself.  she  loved  lukas,  and she  always  would  do  so.  and  it  was  the  truth:  greer  knew sides  of  him  no  one  else  even  got  to  witness.  she  was even  the  only  person  who  actually  knew  his  name.  knew  him behind  the  mask  he  was  wearing.  but  that  didn’t  excuse  his  behavior  and  she  knew  it. ❝  i  just  don’t understand  why  you  make  me  feel  so  fucking  bad  for  loving someone  when  you  are  not  better.  ❞  and  there  it  was,  the anger  she  had  been  holding  back  as  well.   ❝  how often  did  you  and  rylan  broke  up  after  all,  huh  ?  i honestly  lost  count.  she’s  not  good  for  you  either  and yet  you  keep  running  back  to  her.   ❞ 

        finally,  greer  dared  to  look  up.  but  it  was  a  mistake. harshly,  she  bit  down  on  her  lower  lip  as  she  could immediately  feel  the  first  tear  running  over  her  cheek.  she had  to  spill  the  truth.  she  didn’t  want  to,  but  she couldn’t  risk  losing  lukas.   ❝  he  made  me  choose. between  you  and  him...  ❞

[bcllet-archive]

mayahirsch​:

When Maya takes notice to the evident fear inhabiting Greer, she stops in her tracks. Even as awkwardness blossoms with each interaction they had, Maya still feels the desire to protect her from whatever impending doom was on the horizon. “Greer,” She starts, her dark eyes narrowing a tad. “It’s gonna be fine. I promise.” The woman insists, reaching over to gently touch the other’s forearm. It was always hard for Maya to shed that same humorous layer she was always sporting. The one that thrived on never taking anything seriously as well sarcastic comments that same in the shape of an obvious (but poor) coping mechanism. 

Finally, a sigh sounds from her before allowing her gaze to wander. “You know I love a good place to hide.” She jokes, her smile returning. Maya then holds out her arm for Greer to take, signaling for them to start searching for someone for the both of them to hide out for a bit. “While we’re looking, why don’t you tell me what’s making your night so horrible. You know, aside from the actual fucking murder that’s taken place.” Laughter weaves through Maya’s words. Silently, she hopes she could get at least one laugh out of Greer too. 

        strangely,  maya’s  word  had  an  incredibly  soothing  effect on  greer.  she  couldn’t  even  describe  it  but  maybe  it  was the  familiarity  she  shared  with  the  other  woman  before.  it made  her  feel  safe  when  she  most  needed  it.  and  when  maya said  it’s  gonna  be  fine,  there  was  a  part  inside  of  her that  immediately  believed  her.

        ❝  thank  you ❞,  greer  whispered,  a  soft  smile embellishing  her  countenance.  a  rare  sight  this  evening.  and happily,  she  reached  for  maya’s  arm,  the  familiar  closeness  calming  her  down  even  more.  ever  since  their  try  at becoming  more  serious  didn’t  work  out  and  greer  had  backed away,  it  was  always  a  little  awkward  between  them. nevertheless,  the  ballerina  still  saw  a  friend  in  her  despite  everything.   at  her  request,  greer  indeed  had  to laugh,  shaking  her  head  in  disbelief.   ❝  it’s nothing...  important.  ❞  it  actually  was,  but  greer  didn’t know  how  far  she  could  cross  the  line  about  talking  about a  potential  current  relationship  with  someone  she  had  once tried  to  achieve  the  same  with.   ❝  just...  boys  being boys,  basically.  ❞  at  least  a  little  truth,  but  still nothing  in  detail.  instead,  she  tried  to  focus  on  finding  a good  place  to  hide  as  she  wandered  with  maya  through  the halls.