Hello, guys. My name is Kris and I do posts. That's it.
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@bdk1902
Hello, guys. My name is Kris and I do posts. That's it.
Cinder: Okay, we’re a little old to infiltrate Beacon as students, so we’ll have to pretend to be new teachers!
Neo: 🤔
———————————————————
Team RWBY: *scrambling through combined exam/endurance course* 🥵
Cinder: *blows whistle* All right ladies, hit the showers! 😠
Yang: Ugh…! Professor Fall is the worst…! 😫
Weiss: I like her! She thinks I have potential!
Blake: I guess she knows what she’s talking about, but I’m getting some shifty vibes from her…
Ruby: She can have whatever vibes she wants if it makes her cut me some slack on dust combinations!
———————————————————
Neo: *observing with a clipboard and a critical eye* 🤨
Jaune: *wearing a ski mask and holding a gun* THIS IS A F****** RAID!!! EVERYONE DOWN!!! 🤬
Pyrrha: *magnetically unlatches electronic lock*
Ren: *picks mechanical backup lock*
Nora: *carrying gold bars to getaway vehicle*
Neo: *proudly marking “A” on team evaluation while crying tears of joy* I have never been so proud to be an educator!! 😭
Professor!Neo: *calling attendance for the new year* Magna Ren…?
Professor!Neo: Young lady, I had your mother and father in my class back in the day!
Magna: (Renora daughter) My mom says you can use your semblance to change your appearance! Do you use it to cover gray hair? 😃
Professor!Neo: *quietly assigning Magna extra homework* …should’ve known she would be like her mother…! 😡
UmaArc
Well saw the unexpected for Cafe and the sorta expected for Creek...lets see how Tachyon and Stay Gold give him a headache
Jaune: Ya know, Tachyon, I've always wondered, but how do you fund some of your experiments?
Agnes Tachyon: Ah, I can show you, my Guinea Pig, but first... We need to cook
Jaune: Cook... What?
*Tachyon is putting on a yellow jumpsuit and a gas mask*
Agnes Tachyon: Quickly now, we have batches to make before the deadline!
Jaune: Batches of what!?!?
~~~ ~~~ ~~~
Jaune: Stay Gold! Where are you!? Oh man... Where did she wander off to now?
*Ring Ring!*
Jaune: Hm? *Answers his phone* Hello?
Stay Gold: Hello Jaune, I'm gonna need your help
Jaune: Stay? Where are you?
Stay Gold: ... Promise you won't be mad?
Jaune: Where. Are. You?
Stay Gold: Don't be mad!
Jaune: WHERE ARE YOU!?!?
Stay Gold: Korea...
Jaune: Korea!? How did you- Wait... Which Korea?
Stay Gold: ...
Jaune: Stay, which Korea!?
Stay Gold: N-North...
Jaune: HOW DID YOU WANDER ALL THE WAY TO NORTH KOREA!?!?
That’s not even the worst part: She’s now the new Emperor of NK.
Xmen Au: so we've established that Emma has a Daddy kink with Jaune. Does she have a praise kink as well?
Wanda: "Tell me I'm a good girl, Jaune~! I'm a good girl aren't I~?"
Rogue: "Tell me how beautiful I am~! Tell me you love me~!"
Emma: Grrr...! Just wait till I find out what kink you two have, and then we'll see how funny it is!
Wanda has a pregancy kink because of her future with Billy and Tommy, and Rogue has blindfold BDSM.
the european mind cannot comprehend the 48 oz dunkin bucket
Excuse me while I look something up...
1.4 litres????
It is literally this!
Kết quả t?m kiếm Google cho https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ish8NBunrQU/maxresdefault.jpg
Cissia: So all this time…You just wanted to pet Chalky?
Promeia: My apologies if I frightened you all these years. That must’ve been haunted you witnessing me killing them.
Cissia: Alright…you can pet her. *hands Chalky to Promeia*
Promeia proceeded to pet the little snake genttly. On the inside...
‘Cutecutecutecutecute…’ spoke Promeia internally.
Nekoranten
One of these is not like the other.
Weiss: Ruby and I made soup for you since you're sick.
Ruby: Say 'ah' Jaune.
Jaune: You know... It's the thought that counts.
Ruby: Say 'ah'!
Jaune: You take a bite first.
Weiss: Oh don't be a baby, here I'll show you we did a good job. Pass me the spoon, Ruby. *Coughing fit* Euck what's in that?!
Jaune: You mean you don't know?????
Ruby: N-Nothing. Just a pinch of paprika!
Weiss: you call that a pinch?! It’s basically red!
Jane Doe and Cissia: What is a gag reflex?
Wise:
Promeia: What is this?
Wise: It’s called a hug.
Promeia: this makes me feel…off. Never do it again.
*not even 5 minutes later*
Promeia: *leans in on Wise*
Wise: huh?
Promeia: …hug.
Wise: I don’t understand real girls.
Nicole: Uh huh.
Anby: Doubtful, manager.
Nekomiya: i’m nyat so sure~.
Grace: *chasing Eous*
Rina: Ara~.
Ellen: zzzz~.
Lucy: Idiot.
Ceasar: This is like one of my mangas. A harem war.
Burnice: *jamming to her theme*
Zhu Yuan: W-Well…
Jane: Looks like manager still doesn’t know what he’s capable of~.
Astra: The dates said otherwise~.
Evelyn: Miss Yao, please.
Soldier 11 (Harin): Lying, Walter White? 100 push ups.
Trigger: *Visor turned light pink*
Yanagi: fixes her glasses, sporting a pinky flush on her.
Miyabi: I detected lying, fiancée.
Vivian: Lord Phaethon~.
Yixuan: meet my at my chambers at night, my little disciple~.
Ju Fufu: Heya Junior Wise!
Ye Shunguang: Junior~.
Alice: *squirming behind Yuzuha, fidgeting her thumbs*
Yuzuha: Ehe~
Lucia: *playing with Chestnut*
Yidhari: my my~. Looks like I found my next material~.
Seed Jr (Flora): Yahoo, Proxy~.
Orphie: Oh dear… so many girls that like Wise.
Magus: Remember what I taught you, Orpheus!
Cissia: *snacking on Belle’s snacks, and egg pudding*
Venus: Oh junior Proxy~.
Orchedia and Cecilia: Ara~.
Belle:… You’re a goddamn liar, brother.
Wise: Huh?!
Cinder: Okay, we’re a little old to infiltrate Beacon as students, so we’ll have to pretend to be new teachers!
Neo: 🤔
———————————————————
Team RWBY: *scrambling through combined exam/endurance course* 🥵
Cinder: *blows whistle* All right ladies, hit the showers! 😠
Yang: Ugh…! Professor Fall is the worst…! 😫
Weiss: I like her! She thinks I have potential!
Blake: I guess she knows what she’s talking about, but I’m getting some shifty vibes from her…
Ruby: She can have whatever vibes she wants if it makes her cut me some slack on dust combinations!
———————————————————
Neo: *observing with a clipboard and a critical eye* 🤨
Jaune: *wearing a ski mask and holding a gun* THIS IS A F****** RAID!!! EVERYONE DOWN!!! 🤬
Pyrrha: *magnetically unlatches electronic lock*
Ren: *picks mechanical backup lock*
Nora: *carrying gold bars to getaway vehicle*
Neo: *proudly marking “A” on team evaluation while crying tears of joy* I have never been so proud to be an educator!! 😭
Professor Fall: Asian level strict teacher.
Professor Neo: THE PAYDAY GANG! *Razormind intensified*
Uzi and N had a bby
Look at my new son
His name is Wesson
You should name the next baby Smith. So Smith N Wesson!
Wise (in his shorts on the bed): Uhm…Shifu? Is this really part of the training?
Yixuan (in her birthday suit, has taken a lot of fertility pills): Why of course~. This would enhance your stamina and endurance when you’re in the Hollow. Now take them off~.
Cinder: *Holding the Relic of Destruction, doing her evil villain speech* ... and just like that, Vacuo will fall just like all the other kingdoms! And there'll be nothing and no-one who can stop me. No, goody two-shoed brats-
Ruby: *Sick of Cinder's shit* Rude.
Cinder: ... no destitute little princesses-
Weiss: *Sick of Cinder's shit* Just shut your trap already.
Cinder: ... and certainly no sad excuses of a knight!
Jaune: *Definitely done with Cinder's shit* You really need new material.
Cinder: Speaking of pathetic knights. I see the tinned man picked up a helmet. What's wrong, wretch? Don't want your snot-smeared face to be seen by little old me?
Ruby: Jaune. Take of your helmet.
Jaune: Uh, you sure? The Atlas refugee moms were rough and the Vacuans weren't any better. Those married ones were a menace!
Weiss: Just do it.
Jaune: Well... alright then. *Begins taking off his helmet*
Cinder: *Mockingly* What, did the useless one among you have a little accident? Did children run to their mewling mommies to warn about... the... *Sees what's under the helmet* monster?
Jaune: *Grey streaked hair in an elegant tail, his well-groomed beard perfect in every aspect, an A-grade Arc Specimen* So...
Cinder: *Tosses the Relic to Ruby, flies towards Jaune* Mine, mine, mine!
Jaune: *Runs in a futile effort* Oh crap, it's worse than the married moms! *Gets caught* Gah!
Cinder: *Already naked and on top of Jaune* MINE!
Ruby: *Catches Relic* Ha! Mission accomplished. I knew it would work!
Weiss: So you don't feel bad? Like at all, about what Jaune's being subjected to now?
Ruby: *Looks over to where Cinder's wrestling Jaune* Nah, I can go subdue her in a min- *Sees the progress of the match* an hour or so, and we'll be fine.
Weiss: *Watches on with morbid interest, realizing that she's fine with an hour* We are terrible people.
~An hour (Or three) Later~
Cinder: *Sweaty, covered in Jaune's White Essence* Hmmm~ That was fun~ I wouldn't mind doing it again~
Jaune: I think ... if I do that again ... My heart's gonna explode ...
Weiss: *Watching from a distance, Flushed with knocking knees* I can't believe I'm jealous.
Ruby: ... OF WHO!?!?
Weiss: Yes.
Ruby: ... Nope. Nope Not dealing with the fallout of whatever this is. This is my limit! I am LEAVING! You can handle this! ON YOUR OWN!
Jaune: *Mildly sexually shellshocked* Gods be damned, who knew all it took to turn you was some... stress relief?
Cinder: *Recovering, nuzzling into Jaune as she is sprawled on top of him* ~Sure... let's call it that. Honestly, I could do with some more of it.~
Jaune: Woman, you may have been trying to kill multiple times until recently, but by the Brothers you will kill me if you push me right now!
Weiss: *Appearing next to them in a flurry of white and glyphs* What if I help? Make it a 2v1?
Jaune: W-Weiss?! But-
Cinder: *Sliding her body against Jaune's* ~Oooh, we should. After all, I should... apologise to little heiress after I penatrated her with my pulsing hot rod. Only fair she'll get to experience yours which is far more pleasurable.~
Jaune: You can't be serious- *A small piece of cloth hits his face, it's revealed to be a tiny and very damp manner of underclothes* Oh... you are very serious.
Weiss: *Very naked, very wet and very aggressive* Yes. I am. First we shall exhaust the miscreant. Then... Oh then I shall partake in that hot pulsing rod of yours.
Jaune: Aura, stamina, Semblance... please don't fail me now.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Later again and back at where our heroes were lodging
Ruby: *Retelling everything up to where Jaune defeated Cinder* So yeah, that was when I called it quits and came back with the relic. Probably safe to say Cinder's on our side now. And I guess that about covers it.
Yang: Damn, so Vomit Boy became a real White Knight, huh?
Ren: It's certainly a resourceful way of resolving things.
Nora: Haha! I knew the Arc Greatsword would reign supreme! I told you all!
Blake: *Slight nosebleed, holding a pen and notepad* Sure, sure. But Ruby, can you repeat the part where all the penetration happened.
Ruby: No, I-
?????: *Loudly crashes through the door in an exhausted heap* Water, please...
Yang: Dayum, Jaune! You look like you got wrung out like a washcloth.
Jaune: *On his back, staring listlessly at the ceiling* Those two... should never... work together... again. Oh, my pelvis.
Cinder: *Entering after Jaune, stepping over him whilst giving the man a long view of her legs and what's between them* I have not felt this relaxed since... Well, for the first time really. Our knight really worked out those kinks I had.
Weiss: *Entering as well, doing the same as Cinder and offering Jaune a paradisiacal view* Yes, it was most rejuvenating for sure. But to be frank, we will have more matters to discuss. Actual serious matters.
Jaune: *Half delirious from recent events* Well Frank, I wasn't expecting the name change, but I'll get used to it.
RWBYRNC: ...
Yang: Wow, Jaune. Not even half-a-day and you're already pulling dad jokes?
Nora: Fearless Leader? More like, Fearless Breeder!
Jaune: *Processing, Processing, Finished Processing* Ah... Fuck.
EVERYONE: *Goes berserk for various reasons*
Ren: *Handing Jaune a bottle of mineral water, sports drink, and a Pocket watch* You'll need all the years ahead of you to keep up I think.
Jaune: *Downs Water, Downs Sports Drink, Presses Button on watch turning young again* UUUGGGGHH my Pelvis still hurts.
Yang: *Putting on Jaune's armor* I'd give you a pat on the back, but I've got to put the work in to get on your level!
Blake: *Naked* Are you ready my Knight?
Yang: *Ahem* OF course my dear Princess~ Allow me to carry you to your chambers?
Blake: Permission Granted~
Cinder: Wait, What happened there?
Ruby: Jaune's the rusted knight and when he was made young again, he was given an item to switch back and forth between those ages.
Cinder: Oh~ So I may have my prey Fresh as well~
Weiss: Our Prey* Unless you'd like to be My prey~
Cinder: You certainly Devoured Me out there~
Ruby: Gross.
Nora: hah! *Picks up Ren*C'mon Renny! Let's go make Sure Jauney doesn't get lonely in the parent's club~
Ren: *Is picked up* I'll join you in soreness soon Brother!
Cinder: ... now where is Emerald? And the boy?
Emerald: Hey guys We got the Smore's supp- UUUHHHH.
Oscar: What'd you stop for- Oh.
Emerald: ... you know what I think we forgot the- the-
Oscar: Cinnamon graham crackers!
Emerald: Yep! That! Let's go Oscar!
Oscar: Right behind you emerald.
Cinder: that's a fair reaction to me.
Nora: *Sprinting By* WAIT! EMERALD! WE NEED TO HAVE RENNY'S BABIES!
Emerald: ... Sorry oscar!
Oscar: And the Gods curse me yet again.
Weiss: Oh So those three did get together!
Tai's Problem
Summer: We're very very worried about you.
Taiyang: What worried? Why?
Summer: We think you have a problem.
Taiyang: Problem? What problem?
Qrow: You don't drink.
Taiyang: What?
Qrow: You're a fuckin' disgrace.
Summer: Alright now Qrow, please alright!? Tai, there have been rumors going around that you've been abstaining from drinking.
Taiyang: Well, they're lies! Okay, cause I love drinking. It's delicious. I'm drunk right now.
Qrow: Look at him. He can't even slur his words.
Summer: Qrow, we don't know that.
Taiyang: Actually, I went out last night and got absolutely spannered.
Qrow: Hammered?
Taiyang: Hammered!
Summer: That's a warning shot there.
Qrow: I found this in our room *Holds up a bottle of Dasani*.
Summer: Brothers above, a bottle of water, Tai!?
Taiyang: I was holding it for a friend!
Wow, Tai…Dasani…not even good water?
practice doodle - how it feels every time a date event comes around
Wise: Belle! Have you seen my credit card? I can’t find it on my wallet, and I didn’t carry any dennies on me…YOU WHAT?!