[frot-cember-deactivated20241214]

Bitch that’s the tubby custard machine 😂 *image depicts a vast monstrous infernal engine using hundreds of spiderlike arms of black iron to shove the writhing bodies of naked, emaciated humans into its blazing maw*

[throo]

Wh-what do you mean it’s from a birthday cake

[throo]

We could have been eating him

[misscrazyfangirl321]

Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable

[cinturongazo]

im not using wojaks. get on my level

[draconym]

Getting dumped really puts children's cartoon villains into perspective. Like dude you're SO right, love and caring ARE disgusting and we SHOULD cast a spell to drain all human emotion into your amulet.

[draconym]

Friend breakups are how you get lines like "Your friends? You think your friends are coming to save you? Don't make me laugh."

[medievaljournalist]

so you know that cursed sword that slowly drives whoever wields it mad & causes mysterious illnesses? you guessed it: scabbard was absolutely loaded with black mold

[depsidase]

[mihai-florescu]

The lion does not concern itself with the bank account balance when a little treat is calling

[mihai-florescu]

The lion will never financially recover from this

[phantomrose96]

Dealing with burnout is sooooooooooooooo easy all you need to do is operate at 40% indefinitely and be kind of mad at yourself the whole time.

[sermna]

???

[not-your-average-url]

I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.

I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.

[charl0ttan]

horses cant scratch themselves but humans cant go fast. we support this legandary partnership

[druggonaut]

Wrong! Humans irrelevant and obsolete now

[charl0ttan]

agnostic horse: we just dont know where scratch posts come from

[07242024-deactivated20240725]

mp3 player wrapped

you listened to songs

i love you

[lenn-ey]

crossfaded on apple slices and peanut butter

[latedawnsandearlysunsets]

[mon3trs]

[wetorturedsomefolks]

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.