(past: cf1 cf2) dont ignore, leaving me to fend for myself in a dangerous & impossible situation. current goals: $40 July 20th. $871.82 & $41 July 24th. $70-$100 asap. INFO UNDER THE READ MORE. HELP ME IF YOU ARE ABLE.
ca vn kofi bmac gfm throne paylinks
goals are for debt repymts/credit card repayments. the asap goal is for litter, toiletries & any other necessities needed (including taxes/fees & tip for delivery).
past crowdfunds which are linked above have info & proof if u need as well as my carrd lists bills i have to cover.
im drowning, i don't know how else to cry out. i have debt & bills to pay. cultists to keep off my back. a cat thats so low on litter its a health hazard. dont assume ill magically be ok, if i dont get help in time things will get worse. the more my situation is ignored, the more likely i will eventually die &/or become homeless.
i cant catch up long enough to be able to do much of anything and every fucking day where i live is an abuse rollercoaster. no one's hiring me. ive been isolated away from public resources. im being pushed into more debt the longer it takes to pay everything back.
selling my own belongings is taking forever as i cant ship shit and must rely on lowballing locals around me. my disabilities & my situation make it nigh impossible to focus or create in terms of art/commissions because im not a statue and everything is affecting me as every day things escalate to life or death.
all meanwhile i have to be extra careful to not expose too much of any type of information online or i endanger myself further as stalkers and harassers are determined to have my head on a pike for the crime of being stuck under severe abuse my whole life without proper means to escape.
i appreciate my current friends mutuals and everyone else for helping when they can but im stuck bc when i show my appreciation in my posts Everytime outsiders decide that means im good on everything forever now! which is not ever true, at least thus far! i still massively need help i just like saying thank you!
sorry this is so disjointed im in tears and so stressed writing this trying to prepare myself for the hell i have to go through today especially. im so tired of struggling and nothing seems to work on my end i want out so bad but this cult and debt have me stuck while others try to paint me as deserving of all this bc they find me cringe or bc they cant understand my type of situation so to them it Must be fake.
im slowly but surely dying here and im so tired of ignoring that Fact while i continue to waste away for the sake of others. the harsh truth of the matter is this road leads to death when i can't get help, a job, use any disability aids, have to walk to get anywhere in blistering heat, dont get to eat constantly, barely have any privacy, cant say anything considered as the wrong thing or step out of line in the slightest. so i apologize when i dont know what to fucking do from here!
and i havent even mentioned in this post yet how they keep me coked up either.
so please, please. anything helps but i can't keep going days and days with only or mostly notes to show on these posts.
and Again im sorry this is deliriously cobbled together in a rush. contemplating suicide all fucking morning hasnt left me in the best headspace either.
i really thought the point of "being lgbt+ doesn't absolve you of racism as a white person" was that white people arent absolved of racism by being marginalized but it really seems like people think other marginalizations make it okay. no being disabled doesn't do it. no being poor doesnt do it. we need to fight against racism actively no matter what.
not feeling safe at home is just such a visceral violent thing and if you’ve ever experienced that I’m really sorry, you’re brave and strong and it’s gonna be okay
Like there is a difference between "My trauma creates impulsive urges and has changed my instinctive reactions to be irrational, I need to relearn shit." vs "I'm traumatized so I Can't Help It and you're not allowed to expect better of me"
germansingergirl
amandla
jacobvanloon
kianamaiart
