Life exploded. I've survived.
So... After eleven years of marriage, my husband left. It's fine. It was coming for a while. It's fine that it's over, I mean. I was prepared for that part. I wasn't as ready the complete insanity that's followed.
I could write everything crazy he's done since he decided to walk out to go party. (That's the reason, y'all. I'm boring because all I do is work, go to school, study, and do responsible adult shit like pay bills and buy groceries. Torture I'm sure) However, I think the latest escapade will nicely sum up the entire situation.
Two days ago, after being asked for a loan by the ex because he is having difficulty living in his car, I found out there was a Grindr account under my estranged husband's name. Naturally, I asked him about it. He had no clue what I was talking about. He brought his phone over and, after going through his email trash and deleted apps, we determined his phone was used to create an account using his email and photos on his phone. This dumb fuck told me that he had rented his phone out to a meth head couple for $5 per night. These ice zombies then created a Grindr profile under the exes name so they could lure and rob gay men! And the ex is just shocked that his new buddies that are squatting the abandoned house and shooting meth would do him dirty like that.
Now, I'm not sure how much of that is truth. But, it was definitely an eye-opener for me. Because even if it wasn't the junkies, it was him. If I thought he was gay, it wouldn't bother me too much. But I honestly believe it was the ex that was planning to lure and rob gay men. As the mother of transgender and bisexual children, I'm horrified!
We have gone no contact. I'm filing for divorce within two weeks.
So yeah... That's been life. Gut punch after gut punch.
Things are getting better though. My bathroom renovations are complete. The landlord picked the bluest blue ever for the wall color. But it's working and there's a floor. My job has become a place I enjoy. I made the dean's list again this semester. Go me. My kids are doing good. And I'm slowly getting my finances straight.
Today's agenda, since I'm off work for the next two days and on holiday from classes, is to clean this house and get my planners for life, work, and classes organized and set up for 2019. I don't know if this is gonna be "my year" or not. I do know that I'm going to get through it and maintain myself physically, mentally, and emotionally.
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