An open letter to the rude girl at the She Loves Me stage door.
Hi, I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to introduce myself, but my name is Sheronah, you can just call me Rona for short, I much prefer that. I am twenty-three years old and I have autism. Yes, you read that correctly. Aspergers to be more specific. Just in case you don’t know what that is, you should probably google the plethora of challenges I face on a day to day basis. Amongst all of those challenges, I have a tendency to hyper focus on things, and alas, have restricted or obsessive interests that makes me seem like a ‘walking encyclopaedia’ about particular topics. Ask me anything about Superheroes or Star Wars and I could talk your ear off for hours, right down to the tiniest of details that most ‘normal’ people probably wouldn’t notice.
That also applies to things like musical theatre. When I see a musical, I don’t just ‘see’ the musical. I SEE the musical. I see the entire thing, and then at the same time I see the tiny little things that usually go unnoticed. I see the patterns on the walls and floors, I see the colours of the books on the shelves, I see the textures of clothing, the pin stripes on pants, every detail of every prop, I see every single person on that stage and I see every single detail of their clothing, hair and make up. I can memorise what colour shoe each character wears in each scene and recall entire scenes by memory. Usually something like this would be a huge sensory overload for me, but in this instance, it is a beautiful moment that has me in awe.
Having Aspergers Syndrome means that emotions are particularly tricky for me and often leave me very befuddled. But when I am sitting in the theatre, and those actors are up there performing and singing. I feel those emotions, and I UNDERSTAND those emotions and that is the most valuable thing to somebody with Aspergers. Just to be able to understand something for once, to be so in the moment, taking every single thing in and everything else fades away. For those two and a bit hours, I’m normal like everybody else.
So, yes, when I was in the city, I saw the show many times and every single time I saw that show, I reacted as if it were the first time all over again. I smiled, I laughed, I cried, I cheered, I clapped, and I left feeling whole, complete, happy, and utterly in love with the show that was able to have such an impact on me, that I went back again and again. And yes, I have an instagram account completely dedicated to Laura Benanti, because of how much she inspires me and helps me through the plethora of bad days that sometimes make me want to give up. I’m sorry that it bothered you and that you found the need to hurt my feelings. I’m even more sorry to myself, for not being able to speak up for myself and for letting your nasty words affect me. I will be trying my best not to let that happen again in the future. I really hope that the next time you are waiting at a stage door, you keep nasty comments to yourself. You never know what other people might be going through and I hope nobody has to feel the horrible feelings I was made to feel, simply by the words of a stranger.
prguitarman
2087
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origamiaround
tangentwithtanner
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